Someone Like You
by CollinsJ
Summary: While searching for a blanket in Maura's house, Jane stumbles across something that reveals things she would rather have not known. But a lot of good does eventually come out of it. STORY COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Hey guys. This totally came to me when I was about to go to sleep and I just couldn't help myself. Will do my best to be fast with the updates...don't I always...*smiles***

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own Rizzoli and Isles, or make any money from the story.**

* * *

Jane thought she may have been in the middle of some strange dream. _Sure feels real, she thought to herself. _The detective foolishly pulled the door shut, backed a few steps away, then approached the door with great caution again. Slowly, she opened it and gave the room a once over, more careful this time around. _Nope, still the same she said to herself._

It was October, and the pending Boston winter had no mercy on its citizens. Maura, it turned out, was 'hot-blooded'. The blonde doctor obviously had some elaborate explanation she could give in more precise medical terminology. Jane however, preferred to just go with 'hot-blooded'. Around 4am Jane usually found herself covered in goose bumps. Maura had a tendency of kicking the covers off during the course of the night, leaving Jane shivering with the winter cold on the nights she stayed over - which were many.

So this particular night the sharp detective had decided to make a contingency plan. She thought it wise to toss an extra blanket on her side of the floor, which she could in the middle of the night, pick up and wrap herself around when her sleeping companion had kicked aside the warm and heavy duvet. Little did she know that her late night innocent plan was going to lead her into uncovering the most peculiar of things.

Maura was in the master bedroom going through her lengthy nightly ritual as usual. It was a little after 11pm and Jane had just finished locking up when she thought of this extra blanket thing. So here she was, standing at the door of one of the four bedrooms occupying Maura's house. It was a spare bedroom that was never used, as far as Jane knew. Twice only had she ever entered that room. The first time was when she had visited Maura's home for the first time and the good doctor had given her a tour of the place. The second and last time, excluding this unfortunate incident, was when Angela moved into Maura's guest house. The elder Rizzoli's things had not been properly sorted into the guesthouse and they figured she'd be more comfortable in the main house for her first night. Jane had entered that room and retrieved an extra pillow from the impeccably spread bed upon Maura's instructions. That's when she'd noticed the neatly arranged blankets that she was in search of this particular night.

To Jane's amazement however, the room was set up completely different this time around. She couldn't even find the vocabulary to define what was before her eyes. Had it been anyone else's house, it wouldn't have been so daunting, _but this was Maura. _

There in the room lay a white-set twin sized bed, with a matching bed frame and dressing table and chest of drawers. The bed was spread with a pink super girly duvet and an about eight-pillow decoration set. On one side of the wall was the largest **'One Direction' **poster she had ever seen, and to her horror, a board cut out figure of one young lad named **Harry. **The book shelf already held a few neatly arranged books and the dressing table was semi covered in **'One Direction' **memorabilia. _Or whatever you call it, she thought to herself. _The room was no doubt set up for a girl between the ages of eight to about thirteen, who was most definitely not just passing by. _Nope, this looks a little long-term, she said to herself once again. _

''What the fuck!'', this was said aloud this time. She was finally coming out of her initial shock and wanting some damn answers. She strode determinedly to Maura's bedroom, extra blanket all but forgotten.

''Is there something you forgot to tell me'', she jumped right into it. Maura was contently walking out of her ensuite and clearly heading to her side of the bed.

''Excuse me?'', Maura didn't miss the accusation in Jane's tone.

''Is there something you would like to tell me?'', she asked again. Not caring to choose different words or elaborate.

''I'm afraid I don't understand what you mean Jane. Care to be more specific'', Maura was using her jocular tone, oblivious to what Jane had witnessed.

''Are you expecting a guest?''

There was a pause, in which Maura realized Jane had walked into the room.

Maura situated herself quietly on the bed, trying, and failing to find the appropriate explanation to offer Jane. The normally impatient detective was leaning against the door frame, waiting 'patiently' for her best friend to speak up. It was moments like these that Maura desperately wished Jane's impatience would win her over. Unfortunately for her, now wasn't one of those times.

''Jane….'', she said carefully. She was in deep fear of saying the wrong thing. Its not like she had really done anything _that _wrong. _''Keep telling yourself that'', she heard Jane's voice in her head. _ ''I was going to talk to you about that''

''When?''

''When I was ready Jane, I just didn't know how to tell you this'', Maura spoke softly. Jane knew that was her placating tone. She wasn't having it.

''Are you ready now'', she raised her eyebrows at the blonde, daring her to answer in the negative.

''Not exactly'', seems Maura was just as stubborn.

''You know what? Forget it. Don't tell me. Its not like I matter right? What is it my concern who choose to have come live with you. I'm only the best friend right'', Jane spoke this as if she was ok with everything, but there she was collecting her gun and badge, making a move to leave.

''Jane, where are you going?''

''I have my own place you know''. Now _that _came out bitterly. ''Sorry Maur. Didn't mean it like that. I'm just going to go over to my apartment. Don't worry about it''.

Jane was clever. This was her way of getting things out of the doctor when the woman didn't want to speak up. She would guilt trip her and threaten to leave. It was mean, she knew it. But it was done with love, no – _for _love. She wanted to be in every part of Maura's life, and she wanted to contribute, and help wherever and whenever. And every time she was left out of the loop by Maura, even for one afternoon, she felt irrationally hurt, just like she did now.

Maura was also clever. She knew Jane's antiques. And when the guilt trips began, she indulged her only because she wanted to. It could be argued that Jane knew this too. It was really a case of what came first, the egg or the chicken? Nevertheless, Maura indulged her as always. She couldn't keep it a secret forever anyway. At some point she was going to have to tell Jane. Maybe it was better to be ambushed now, that to mule over it all night long and still not find the right words to say.

''Please sit with me'', she motioned for Jane to take her usual side of the bed so they could converse. Jane did so.

''I wasn't entirely honest with you''

''No kidding'', Jane bit out. She didn't know why she was being so mad about this.

LIE….She knew. She just didn't want to say it, or think it.

''No, Jane. I mean to say that, I wasn't honest with you from the very beginning. As in, from the time we met''

Warning bells of all sorts were going off in Jane's head. She didn't even want to begin to guess.

''What didn't you tell me? That you have of kid or something'', Jane said sarcastically.

Woops…..soft spot. Maura didn't answer.

''Holy shit! Fuck Maur! DO YOU HAVE A KID?'', Jane practically jumped off the bed.

''Jane….will you please calm down'', Maura pleaded.

''CALM DOWN? YOU HAVE A FUCKING _CHILD _MAURA. AND YOU NEVER THOUGH TO MENTION IT ALL. THESES. YEARS…THAT WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS'', Jane yelled at the top of her voice. She was almost sure her mother had heard her from the guest house.

''Can you please stop swearing Jane, its really unnecessary''. This got her to calm down – just a little bit though. ''sit down Jane so I can explain properly''

''Boy do I wanna hear what you have to say''

''It's…''

''Oh God please don't tell me its with Ian'', Jane cut off. Looking utterly destroyed. Maura was taken aback a little bit. It hadn't ever occurred to her that having a child with Ian could devastate Jane to such a degree. It was common knowledge Jane despised the man, rightfully so. Maura just hadn't known it wasn't just dislike, but hurt as well. For a fraction of a second, regardless of the circumstances, she allowed herself to imagine that Jane may actually harbour the same feelings she had for the brunette.

''No Jane, its not with Ian''

''So-''

''Let me explain this from the beginning Jane, so you may fully understand''

''Ok'', Jane took in a deep breath, as if she were about to dive into a swimming pool.

''Her name is Joyleen Yolanda Bellamy and she's 12'', Maura had no idea why she started off there. It seemed it was the only fact to her whole story and the only thing she could safely say with complete honesty.

''Wow'', was all Jane could say. _Talk about bomb shells. _

''She is living in France with her mother''

''Fuck'', Jane was making a move to leave again. She wasn't sure what she expected to hear, but this certainly wasn't it. MOTHER?

''Jane, please let me tell you. I have been trying to say this for the past four years I've known you but it just could never make it out of my mouth''

''If she wasn't coming here were you ever going to tell me?'', Jane tapped her foot to the floor impatiently.

''No'', Maura couldn't lie, even if she wanted to.

Jane walked away briskly, and Maura had to run to catch up with her long strides.

''Jane wait. Why are you so mad with me?''

''Because Maura. These are the types of things you tell your best friend ok. I understand that you have never really _had _friends but come on. This should be general knowledge. How do you think it makes me feel, after four years of a rel-, friendship'', she caught herself pretty fast. Maura didn't miss it, but chose to let it go for now, it really wasn't the time for _that. _''how do you think I feel learning after all this time that my best friend has a daughter? A fucking twelve year old daughter. What the hell Maura?''

They were downstairs at this point and Angela, with her eagle ears, couldn't let the yelling slide.

''Jane, why are you shouting like that?'', Angela barrelled through the kitchen door.

''Jesus Christ'', Jane muttered under her breath. Her brain was filled with the name Jane going round and round in circles. Maura had said it at least ten times now, and here her mother was again, piling on. She wished they would all just stop saying Jane at the beginning of every sentence. And it frustrated her more that in the midst of Maura's revelations, this tiny little irrelevant detail was nagging her. ''Now is so not the time Ma. I don't wanna say something I will regret, please just leave''. Maura nodded to Angela as well. She really didn't want the situation escalating any further that it already had.

''Fine. But could you please keep it down. The whole block can hear you'', with that Angela left. She truly sensed they were having a very serious discussion, and her nosey ass knew better than to stay.

''I'm sorry isn't going to be enough to appease you right now Jane. But I think it would be fair if you at least let me explain the situation''

''Sorry'', she mumbled.

''Its rather cold. Do you mind if we go back and finish this conversation in bed?''

''Stupid cold''

''Huh?'', Jane hadn't realized she spoke out loud until Maura had spoken back to her.

''Stupid cold is what got me in this mess'', she waved her hand an nothing in particular.

''I don't understand''

''I was looking for an extra blanket because you always kick the duvet off. And I went into your spare bedroom….'', she let it trail off, knowing Maura got the gist of it.

''I'm sorry''. The blonde wasn't sure if she was apologizing for kicking the covers, or for keeping a secret.

Anyway, they amicably walked back to the master bedroom. To have a conversation Jane wanted so much to hear, and not at all, at the same time. She knew where her rage stemmed from. There was not really a logical reason for a simple best friend to lose their mind to such an extent. And she was experiencing much more than just rage, and it angered her even more. She hated how Maura brought out the extremes of all her emotions. Positive or negative. It just left her vulnerable and helpless, and she loathed it. Worse still, there was nothing she could do about all those feelings. Its not even like making them know will make anything better, if anything, it will make all those emotions the more prominent.

They settled back into their positions on the bed, each sitting as stiff as a board.

''Will you let me continue now?''

''Yes'', Jane rasped.

''I am sure I won't find the most suitable sequence of events, and I may miss some things, or not explain properly. Forgive me. This is a conversation I rather wish I didn't have to ever have''

''It's ok. I am sorry for being an ass Maur. You know I don't exactly have the best track record when it comes to handling certain things''

''I know''. This at least lighten the moods and brought about a bit of laughter.

Maura then cleared her throat, and began to explain to her best friend….

* * *

**AN: Ooooohhh, Maura's keeping secrets. **


	2. What Happened

**AN: Thanks you guys. *WARNING*, mention of abortion, for those who don't want to hear about that. Sorry.**

* * *

''In a way you could say she's not even my daughter, but I-I feel like I owe it to her'', she was starting to tear up and there is nothing Jane hated more than a teary Maura.

''Sweetie, its ok. Just tell me, it's alright'', she stoked her upper arm for a little bit of reassurance.

''The first….and only girl I dated was Margo. I was in France, and still very young and at the peak my adventurous phase. She was three years older, and about the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen'', she said wistfully. ''we were at the university and I met her through a group mate of mine. She was studying journalism'', Maura chuckled a little. It was kind of funny, how two people like her and Margo could ever cross paths. Anyway, they did.

''That's interesting'', Jane added needlessly. She had started hating the woman right after Maura said they dated.

''We were together for almost three years, my longest relationship to this day. I even met her parents. And her mine, like wise. Then ummm…'', she nervously fidgeted, knowing she was getting to the most….complicated part. ''then she fell pregnant''

''She _cheated _on you?'', Jane's eyes almost fell out.

''You could use those words, yes''. Maura was calm, and it was unnerving to Jane. ''she didn't know who the father was''

''You've gotta be fucking kidding me''

''Jane. Do you have to keep swearing?''

''Sorry, sorry. Go on'', she raised her hands in surrender. Her mind was made up though, she was going to drain the life out of this Margo if she ever saw her. No one had the right to put Maura through all that – no one!

''I was very hurt Jane, more so now than then''

''How is that even possible?''

''I was young and in love. Foolish and naïve. It hurt a little then, but I recovered very quickly. When I thought about it as I got older though, I began to realize the impact of what she had done to me''

''Having a child is a very big deal Maur''

''I know. I was twenty-three then. Everything felt serious Jane. I thought I would be with her forever. She loved me, gave me attention, cared for me, made time for me, listened to me. Those were all the things I yearned for. I had always felt like an outcast, but she made me fit in just a little bit. Maybe she was using me since she was a bit older, I don't really know Jane to be honest. But during that time, it felt real and wonderful''

''So what happened?'', Maura had paused for a rather long time and Jane figured she needed some coaxing.

''She wanted to have an abortion. I couldn't let her do that''

''Not that I condone her actions, but why wouldn't you want that. I would think it would work out better for you. And after she cheated, did you really still _want _to be with her?'', Jane wasn't seeing Maura's logic yet.

''I don't quite know what I was thinking Jane. It was confusing and I didn't have anyone to talk to except her. I was scared that I'd lose her, furious that she had slept around, and I just didn't like the idea of an abortion at all''

''So….''

''So I told her I would support her. A very ill thought out idea on my part. I promised her I would be with her through it all, that the child would be ours and we'd raise it together''

Jane ran her hands over her face several times, wondering what the best words to say would be. She didn't want to be upset with Maura, she had no right being angry with the blonde. Maura might have omitted this information, but she understood Maura's actions to a certain extent. When a person is lonely and they finally find someone, they want to cling on for as long as they can. If she analysed herself carefully, she would find out she was just like 23 year old Maura. Jane had always been lonely emotionally, up until she met Maura. And she understood that she would do anything for Maura, if the alternative meant losing her.

''I didn't keep my promise Jane'', Maura began to cry once more. Jane quickly gathered her in her arms, planting kisses and offering kind words. She had to be strong and understanding for Maura. ''I have carried this guilt with me all these years''

''You didn't do anything wrong Maura''

''I did. Don't lie to me Jane. I stayed with Margo. We were happy together throughout the whole pregnancy. I did everything I said I would, I was there for her in any way I could be. And the baby was born. Oh Jane….'', Maura cried some more. ''she was so small, and so…..real. I left her in the hospital and never turned back. Who does _that?''_

All the self-loathing Maura had desperately tried to rid herself of over the years was coming back full force. All the lies she's used to convince herself over the years that what she had done was acceptable all faded into nothing now that she was faced with it all over again.

''Its ok Maur, it will be alright'', Jane tried to sound convincing. She didn't.

''I transferred to BCU and just left her. With a child I had promised we would raise together. I-I'', Maura was choking on her words, trying to get everything out at once. ''I used to sing to the baby. I think she knew my voice. She would kick when I spoke to Margo's stomach'', Maura laughed a little through the tears. Jane was still holding her against her chest and she was glad for the support. Jane was always her pillar of strength. ''we shared an apartment and we had a room already set up for the baby. I enjoyed buying baby clothes Jane. They were so small and adorable. I cut the umbilical cord, held her as she took her first breath, kissed her and fled. I can't believe I did such a thing''

''Shhh Maur. You were scared. It's alright. You stuck around that long, I would have run for the hills long before that''

The first thing about Jane Maura fell in love with was her humour. Never in her life had she met such a funny person. Someone who knew how to find humour in almost everything. That was the most endearing thing Maura had ever seen.

''What about your parents?''

''Well, I can only imagine that Margo's parents were livid, but I can't say for sure. I told my mother not to ever tell them where I was, or tell me what was going on in France with the baby. I just wanted to be completely detached and act as if it all never happened. My mother hadn't been particularly keen on the idea to begin with, so I can safely say it was more of a relief to her. Father couldn't really be bothered''

''I'm sorry. I wish there was something I could do''

''Yes there is''

''Anything'', Jane knew she would do anything.

''Forgive me…for not telling you sooner''

''But first tell me why you never said anything''

''By the time I met you Jane, I had long moved on from that period in my life. And truthfully, I didn't anticipate there would ever come a time when I would have to speak of this. I felt like it was unnecessary opening of wounds if it was sure to never have anything to do with our lives. So I just forgot about it, and decided against ever mentioning it. I also concluded that if I was going to say something, I would have had to say it at the beginning of our friendship. By the time you get to year four, it's sort of weird to mention it. And I certainly wasn't going to say anything at the beginning of our friendship. I was so happy Jane. You made me so happy. And the last thing I wanted was to ruin it with talk about all the bad things I had done in the past''

''I understand. I hope you don't mind my asking, but why is she coming here _now?''_

Maura took a very deep breath. Another hard thing to explain. It really wasn't getting any easier for her.

''Do you remember when I went to meet my mother in New York a month ago?''

''Of course. When I had to babysit your _very interactive _**tortoise**'', Jane looked smug at having remembered the name correctly. She always did anyway. When she said turtle it was just to get a rise out of Maura, and maybe a little attention. The detective had a funny way of acting like a child sometimes. Maura loved it though, and Jane knew it – again, the case of the egg and chicken.

''Yes, that time Jane. When I got there, she informed me that Margo's mother had passed away a week prior''

''I'm sorry about that Maur''

''It's quite alright. The problem is that Margo's mother is the one that raised Joyleen, I learned. She lived with the child from after she was born. She was in an accident, and died in hospital a few days after''

''Oh my God'', Jane gasped. It really did seem like the situation got worse after every sentence.

''Margo had made it very clear that she didn't want to have children. I begged her to keep that child, then I left her. I owe so much to that poor child Jane, so much I don't even know where to begin''

''You'll make it up Maur, don't beat yourself about it''

''My mother said Margo was going to give the child up for adoption, but her mother decided to take her instead. Margo went on with her life, while Joyleen stayed with her grandmother. And since she is deceased now, the child has no one to take care of her. Margo's father can't do it on his own, and Margo herself has vehemently refused to do so. She….ummm''

''What Maur?'', Jane saw the hesitancy in her best friend and had a feeling there was more bad news coming.

''Margo told Joyleen that she didn't have a father, but had another mother. Can you believe she never even bothered to find out who Joyleen's real father was? Turns out she told the child quite a lot about me. So when my mother arranged we meet a month ago, it was to inform me that Joyleen had personally called her and asked to be brought to her other mother – me''

''How did she get hold of your mother?''. Jane knew it really wasn't the most important question out of the myriad she had, but it came out anyway.

''Margo gave her the number. She told her that she could ask me to come and live with her, and if I said no she would then work on getting her into foster care''

''How can she not want to take care of her daughter?''

''She never wanted her Jane. And apparently she does journalist work all over the world and doesn't have the will nor the time to look after the child''

''So….''

''So I asked my mother to speak with Margo and arrange that she be brought to stay with me. Permanently''

''Permanently! Are you sure Maur, I mean….''

''I have never been more sure Jane. I abandoned that child twelve years ago. She doesn't deserve to be put in foster care. It may not exactly be my fault that she was brought into this world, but in a way it is. If I hadn't pressured and assured Margo about keeping her, maybe she would have just had an abortion and all of this would not be happening. But I made sure the baby was kept, and then left. So its my turn to make it up now. I have to do right by her. I have to do make it up to Margo too. I hurt her as well, and words can never make it up. This is the only way I can apologize and compensate for my wrong doings. Do you understand Jane?''

''I do Maura''

''Thank you''

Jane smiled sweetly at her. Maura was so cute, all the time. And Jane knew, even without being asked, that she was going to be there for Maura and Joyleen come what may.

''So this is why the room is set up?''

''Yes. While I was in New York, my lawyer sorted the paper work for me. He liaised with Margo and guardianship has been granted to me effective two weeks ago. Once she's here I will work on the adoption''

''Okaaaaaay'', Jane dragged out.

''When the paper work came through I then had someone come to do her bedroom. I was informed that she is a fan of the British boy-band **One Direction, **so that explains why her room looks the way it does''

''I see'', Jane was trying hard to take it all in.

''She is arriving on November 20th. And when she gets here we have to start looking for places for school and getting her settled in properly. At least-''

''Wow….back up a little. She'll be here in a month?''

''Yes''

''That's so soon. And how did all of this happen without me even knowing''

''In case you were wondering why I have been looking a bit too tired of late, that's your explanation. Sneaking around is not a very easy thing Jane, especially for someone who cannot lie''

''Well, I'm impressed then''

Maura began fidgeting with her fingers once more. Here Jane was thinking they had gone through all the bitter subtopics. Whatever Maura had to add now, was probably even worse than anything else she had said. The doctor was on the verge of pulling apart her fingers with the vigour she used to twist and rub at them.

''I feel a bit cold Jane. Shall I just turn the heating up a little bit more?''

''No!'' Maura's progress was halted immediately. She was standing up very quickly and heading out into the hallway and Jane was very quick to put the brakes on her. ''Spit it out now Maura. I know you aren't cold''

Maura really hadn't lied. She _was _cold. But it wasn't actually from the weather, it was from fear. The blonde didn't want to have to say this to her best friend, but she was well aware that she had no choice.

''Maura, just say it. You have gone this far already. How bad can what you have to say really be?'', Jane pleaded. Holding onto Maura's hands as she blocked the way for the doctor to escape. ''I can handle it Maura. Let me help you''

''Margo is coming with her. To drop her off I mean''

* * *

**AN: Oh snap….**


	3. Little Things

**AN: I cannot stress this enough….this is a RIZZLES story NOT a Maura/Margo pairing. Thanks for your continued support again. **

* * *

Jane was pretty sure what Maura had just said was the definition of losing something you never had. She felt Maura slipping away in that very second. She knew almost nothing about Margo, and almost everything about Maura, but was fairly certain she had lost a battle she hadn't even known she was fighting. _I should have told her how I felt a long time ago. I should have done something, anything. How do I even begin to compete with this Margo person now? I've lost my chance. This is it._

''Jane'', Maura yelled for what Jane could only assumed was not the first time.

''Yeah''

''Did you hear what I said?'', she asked tentatively.

''Of course I did'', Jane answered back a little annoyed.

''You seemed to have….ummm, drifted off a little bit''

''Sorry, just….you know''

''No I don't''

''Forget it. So….Margo is coming along too''

''I haven't spoken to her. But my mother and her, oh and my lawyer, all agreed that it would be best if she brought Joyleen over in person. Solely for the purpose of the child. She doesn't know me. And it would only be beneficial if she wasn't just blindly brought here on her own. It's a whole different continent where she is expected to begin a completely new life, with someone she has never met. To be honest I was shocked to hear she herself had asked to be brought to me. I am unaware of what exact details she learned about me over the years, but either way I owe her''

''I hear you Maur. How long is she staying? Margo I mean''

Maura could hear Jane was not happy at all. It was adding up to about two hours since they began this conversation. They had work in about six hours, if murder didn't call sooner. She wanted to suggest they go to sleep, and continue the discussion tomorrow, but the blonde knew it wasn't going to sit well with Jane at all.

''Do you think we could maybe absent ourselves from work tomorrow?''

''What! Why?'', Jane didn't see _that _coming.

''There is quite a bit more to say Jane. I am exhausted, and I know working tomorrow without this resolved is going to be very challenging. I would very much like to have this cleared out as best as we can. I'd like the chance to say everything I have to say. I have years of stored emotions Jane. Things that I would've liked to say but never knew how, or to whom to say them to. I have questions, and fears, and…..so much Jane, so much. Please''

''Ok''. Jane walked out of the room, and Maura quietly went to tuck herself back in bed.

It was an odd situation. Logically there wasn't anything she should really have been feeling bad about. Yes, she neglected to inform her best friend about some past details. It really wasn't the end of the world. Jane could be upset, just a little, then they would move on. But that was a lie. Her friendship with Jane wasn't just a friendship. Jane had been very accurate when she nearly slipped up earlier in the night. What they had was a relationship. It might not have been romantic, but it was a relationship nonetheless. And things like that are not what you keep from someone who you are in a relationship with. Moreover, Maura knew there was no way she could do this without Jane. She had had a glimpse into what living with a child was like when TJ had been abandoned on her door step. Then to top it off, she had found herself responsible for Cailin for a few days. It was very tiresome work. She was not in the least bit equipped for it. Her reliance fell heavily on the Rizzoli family, but mostly on Jane. By bringing herself into this, she had brought Jane into it as well. So the brunette had every single right to yell, and shout, and be angry and pissed off. This was being thrown into her face as well. And she had gotten no warning about it whatsoever.

Jane had just sent an email to Cavanaugh on her and Maura's behalf, requesting a personal day. She was done and found she had no desire to move from Maura's office chair. She wanted to scream and cry at the same time. Her fear was only one. That Maura and Margo would rekindle whatever they had all those years ago. And that was killing her mercilessly. She didn't even want to imagine the pain of watching the woman she had loved for FOUR WHOLE YEARS, loving someone else. She had to do something. She had to fight for Maura. She had one month, _one month_ before Margo came, to tell and show Maura how much she meant to her. She had no time, and she was going to have to start tomorrow. Jane Rizzoli never backed down. If Maura didn't want her in the end, at least she'd know she tried.

So she pulled herself together and quickly made some plans online for what they'd do on their day off tomorrow. When she finished she walked back into the bedroom, to her relief, Maura had fallen asleep.

''You really were exhausted'', Jane whispered into the dark room. ''Not that you could lie about it'', she chuckled to herself. Settling down quietly achieved, she closed her eyes and fell asleep as well, trying to remind herself to be bold for the upcoming month.

* * *

Maura's usual alarm went off at 6:45 am. The doctor always gave herself ample time to do her yoga or run, take a shower, have breakfast, and dress up. Her internal clock worked just as fine though. Normally by the time the alarm went off, Maura would already have been awake. She usually got up at 6:30am. She never wanted to admit to herself, but she got up at that time for one reason – Jane. Somehow during the night, they tended to gravitate towards each other. And Maura loved, more than anything else, the feeling of waking up to Jane's arms wrapped around her. She would allow herself fifteen minutes of uninterrupted pleasure every night Jane slept over. Those where always the best fifteen minutes of her day.

Jane hated Maura's alarm. Before it increased its tempo, Jane lazily lunged to shut it up. She was spooning Maura, almost as usual. Getting hold of the phone, she desperately tried to shut it up before it woke the sleeping blonde in her arms. Mission accomplished, she threw it back and settled peacefully back into her position. Maura hadn't moved so she assumed the doctor was still asleep, since she had been thoroughly exhausted the previous night.

She secretly placed a kiss to Maura's neck, and nuzzled further into her – front against back. Maura smiled, and tried to fall back asleep. She did, so did Jane. How could they not, they fit so perfectly together.

Angela barged into the house at 8am. She didn't have work till nine, so she figured she'd nose around as she always did. She had spotted Jane's car and Maura's still parked in the driveway, so knew the two were still around. It was unusually quiet in the house though. She tip toed to the master bedroom very quickly. Angela had no sense of boundaries. Unlike Maura, the matriarch knew it. The blonde at least over stepped without knowing; Angela on the other hand, did it very purposefully. It was rare to wake up before the doctor, so Angela took the opportunity. She knew the two shared a bed all the time. She just wasn't sure what happened behind closed doors.

She carefully opened the door to the master bedroom, where she saw the two fast asleep. Maura had kicked the cover off, so Angela had a clear view – not in a perverted way though. The two were spooned together intimately. Jane with her left leg and hand over Maura's body, face buried in gold locks. Angela smiled smugly. She totally knew they were sleeping together. What she didn't understand was why they still had the whole men thing going on if they were together. There was only one explanation. And Angela concluded that what they had was just a physical thing, purely sexual, nothing else. So she went back down stairs and headed off to work.

When the pair awoke again, it was almost 9am. Maura hadn't slept that long in a very long time, and she was quite relieved at how refreshed she felt. She had been so tense for a whole month now. The secrets and procedures transpiring without Jane's knowledge had left her too mentally fatigued.

* * *

''You still aren't going to tell me where we are going are you''

''Nope''

Jane had rushed out on an 'errand' just after waking up, leaving Maura with so many questions. When she returned, she told the blonde they were going 'somewhere' to have a bit of 'fun', before going 'somewhere' else, to talk more. The doctor hated cryptic things. She was glad they had arrived at their destination though. Curiosity was killing her.

''The Roller Rink Jane! What are we doing here?''

''Come on, lets go'', Jane jumped out of Maura's Prius heading for the back entrance.

''It's a Thursday afternoon, they are closed'', Maura called from behind though she was diligently following the brunette.

They reached the back door and a young man opened up for them.

''Hey Tony''

''Place is all yours''

The two did a strange fist-pump and Tony was on his way. ''Thanks buddy, I owe you''

Jane quickly lifted her hand to silence her best friend before Maura began the questions.

''His dad owns the place. His elder brother used to be a friend of Tommy's a while back. They don't open on Thursdays, so we have the place to ourselves for as long as we want. Come on'', she pulled Maura in.

''Ok…'', Maura scanned the place in amusement. She wasn't quite sure why Jane had picked such a choice of entertainment, but she decided to just go along. Any distraction would do really.

The place was dimly lit, kind of romantic in its own teenage-ish way. Jane waved her hand for Maura to follow her into the little box room they have inside for the DJ. When Maura caught up, Jane flashed three CD's right in her face.

**One Direction ''up all night'', ''take me home'', ''midnight memories''**

Maura immediately smiled that smile that made Jane swoon.

''Jane…'', she purred.

''Thought we'd better acquaint ourselves. I don't wanna look like a fool when I tell Joyleen that her mother knows everything, when you don't even know a single song by these boys''

''That's really thoughtful Jane, thank you. It hadn't even occurred to me to familiarise myself''

''Motherhood 101 : she'd probably be more impressed with you singing along to One Direction than with you providing a bed for her to sleep in''

''You can't be serious?'', Maura asked in pure shock.

''Just wait and see''

_I knew I couldn't do this without you, Maura mused._

''You wanna skate a bit while this plays?''

''Sure''

Jane put the first CD in and they went to put some skates on. Maura was surprised to find herself actually liking the boy-band.

Then Jane went to put in the second album and they skated some more.

''…_everytime we to—ou—uch, you get this kinda ru – u – ush, baby say yeah…..let me kiss you''_

They had skated fast to that song, and they were dancing as well. It was Jane's favourite and she had to go and replay it again. After the third time, they were tired and decided to rest a little. They lay down in the middle of the rink facing the ceiling as the next song began to play. It was by mere coincidence that it was a slow track that they could just listen to while they caught their breath. They were too tired to speak for a little while and in no time, they both got caught up in the song.

''…_.You'll never love yourself half as much as I love you. And you'll never treat yourself right, darling, but I want you to. If I let you know I'm here for you. Maybe you'll love yourself like I love you…''_

Maura was so quiet, listening intently. She didn't even notice the tear that rolled down her cheek – Jane did though. She would have been as emotional too if she hadn't heard the song before. It was simply beautiful. When it came to an end, she swiftly stood up and went to put it on repeat. Maura didn't have to ask, she knew the blonde wanted to hear it again a few more times.

When Jane re-joined her again in the middle of the roller rink, she went to lie right beside her, and gently took her hand, placing a light kiss on Maura's knuckles.

''…_.And I'm joining up the dots with the freckles on your cheeks. And it all makes sense to me….'' _Maura wiped another tear.

''…_.I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth. But if I do. It's you. Oh, it's you they add up to  
I'm in love with you. And all these little things…''_

The song played three more times before Jane decided she didn't really want Maura to start weeping, because she was surely getting there. The detective went to turn the music off and stretched her hand out for Maura to stand.

''That was my favourite song of all of them'', she whispered.

''I like it too'', Jane smiled. She'd never pegged the blonde to be one to get all emotional over a song. It should have been everything going on that was piling on. ''Should we go for lunch somewhere?''

''Can we just have it here?''

''Are you sure?'', Jane asked – surprised.

''Please'', the impending conversation had Maura already drained before it began. She figured she might as well get it over with while she was already in the state she was in.

''Ok. I'll order Chinese''

Their lunch came and they enjoyed it in relative silence. Jane knew Maura was trying to gather herself, and she didn't want to push her.

After eating, Maura began.

''My mother said Margo will be staying until December 3rd. She'll use the other spare room, so Angela doesn't have to worry herself''

Jane wasn't worried about her mother in the least bit. It was this French woman that bugged her. Jane was sure she was going to be sleeping over at Maura's for two whole weeks. Unless of course Maura told her otherwise.

''If she hasn't changed from the person she was in university, she's a nice person. She was very open minded, and strong willed and focused. She talked a lot and liked to dance. I can't tell you were I went wrong with her. Everything seemed so fine, and the next thing – she's pregnant. I assumed it must have been because I didn't find a vast amount of pleasure from the parties everyone went to. That should have been where I lost her. Because she said she slept with 'whoever' at some party, where she was completely drunk and had no recollection of much of the night. I can't say for sure whether it was that one time, or if it happened often. She told me it was that one time, and I believed her then''

Jane hated to hear all this, but she had to.

''She was the first woman I was ever attracted to. She was so sure of herself. I was in awe of her. I loved her. My mother always said it was a phase I would grow out of, I guess she was right''

Jane instantly felt crushed. Did Maura mean the lesbianism was a phase, of the loving Margo was a phase. She had to know, so she asked.

''Which part exactly was the phase, liking women or liking Margo?''

* * *

**AN: I can't help myself, sorry, but how are you guys feeling about this so far?**

**I love those 2 one direction songs, I also couldn't help myself.**


	4. Stay everyday with me

**AN: Just thought I'd put this out there (about Angela's beliefs) - my mind tells me that IF Angela isn't fond of Jane's attraction/love for Maura, she will pass it off as just a physical thing, as a copying mechanism. I donno, thats just what I think. Anywho...**

* * *

''My attraction to Margo I suppose''

Jane wanted so badly to continue with that line of thought, but she had to let it go for now since she had at least one answer.

''You don't think I am rushing things with Joyleen do you?'', Maura asked softly.

''Honestly, yes. I think you are. But I really do understand where you are coming from. I just don't want there to be problems with Margo that's all''

''What kind?'', Maura dreaded to even think of that aspect.

''I don't know. She may want what you guys had before, or she may change her mind about Joyleen and want to take her back. Or maybe Joyleen may even change her mind''

''After running off, I am fairly certain Margo doesn't want anything between us. If she does….I don't know Jane. I don't feel that way about her anymore''

''Just cause you haven't seen her yet'', Jane defended.

''I highly doubt that would make a difference. With all that's going on, that really isn't on my mind. I would rather not go down that road. If she changes her mind that's alright. At least I know I would have tried, same goes for Joyleen''

''Did you name her?''

''I picked Yolanda. I'm surprised Margo still gave her the name. I figured after I left she would have forgone it''

''She still loves you maybe'', Jane said solemnly.

''I don't know. I feel so out of touch. All of sudden, I just don't know so many things. I really thought I had a handle on...my life. That I had moved on and things were alright. But as of late, everything just seems to be crumbling down little by little''

''There are things we can never run away from Maur, it always catches up with us. But I need you to understand that you are not alone in this. Look at me'', Jane moved her face up so she could have a close look into her eyes. ''you're my best friend, and I love you, so much'', she faltered a bit but caught herself and continued. ''I could never let you face this alone. I will be there, every step of the way. Don't ever hesitate to ask for my help, I will do all that I can to help you. Joyleen will love you Maura, how can she not?''

''Maybe she heard all sorts of terrible things about me''

''If she had, I doubt she would have asked to come live with you. Give yourself some credit Maura. You're awesome, and you know it. Now stop being modest will you'', Jane nudged Maura a little and they both laughed. The conversation was becoming too serious for Jane and she needed to diffuse the intensity a little bit. Maura was always grateful for that gift Jane had.

''Thank you Jane, for everything''

''You're welcome. Still feel like skating?''

''Just a bit more. I may have eaten a little too much, the exercise will be helpful''

''On it''

Jane put the music back on, and they skated for a little while more until they were well spent.

It was around 6pm when they made it back home. They both showered and sat down to watch a few television programmes while relaxing their muscles. Later that evening, Jane made dinner and they took an early night in preparation for the next day at work.

* * *

''What do you think about Margo living here for the duration of her stay?'', Maura spoke into the dark room when they were settled into sleep.

''I don't know'', Jane lied. She knew _exactly_ how she felt. She hated the idea, and she didn't want it happening. But she had no right to say that to Maura.

''You must have some kind of opinion Jane. You can't possibly feel indifferent about it''

''It's happening Maura, is it important what _I _feel?'', Jane flailed her hands into the air.

''It is to me'', There Maura went again with that tone and those words that left Jane weak in all parts of her body. She had to choose her words carefully. Her intent for the next whole month was to make her feeling known, but she didn't want to just throw them at Maura.

''I feel…uneasy about it'', she began safely. ''I don't want you hurt. I don't want her to come here and make you unhappy and uncomfortable in your own home. I don't want her blaming everything on you and leaving you with choices and decisions you don't wanna make. I don't want her hurrying you into anything you aren't ready for'', it was now all just coming out for Jane like rain water. And Maura was deeply touched. ''I know you're an adult Maur, and I probably have no say in it. But I am scared of what is going to happen with you two under the same room. I don't want you doing anything you will regret''

Maura searched for Jane's hand under the covers, accidentally brushing against Jane stomach which caused the detective to shiver involuntarily. ''I appreciate your concerns. And as my best friend, I would like to think that you _have _a right, and you _have _a say in my life. Because if I get hurt, it's you that I will come to. So you are allowed to say all these things to me'', Maura unconsciously fiddled with Jane fingers thinking through what she wanted to ask her best friend.

''You're fidgeting with my fingers Maura. Say it'', Jane knew her tell all too well.

''I just don't know how to ask this of you''

''You should know by now that I would do just about anything for you'', the words came out before Jane had the chance to sensor them.

And Maura spoke before Jane had the opportunity to rephrase her sentence, ''I know Jane. I would do the same for you'', she rubbed on Jane's fingers again. ''Can you…or is it possible…it's uhhhh'', the words were not coming to her.

''What is it Maura?'', Jane feared it was more bad news again. Or was Maura trying to tell her stay away during the time Margo would be around? Jane thought she'd die if Maura asked that of her. She wouldn't be able to do it.

''Is it too much to ask, for you to stay here….everyday, while Margo is around'', she said swiftly.

Jane let out the breath she was holding. ''It's not too much. And I will gladly do it. Can I ask why though?''

''I'm scared. And the worst part is that I don't even know what I am afraid of. I just think I will feel much more secure with you around whilst she's here''

A thought occurred to Jane out of nowhere, she shot up immediately, ''Maura did she ever hurt you?'', her voiced had gone several octaves high in the space of a second.

''No Jane!'', Maura shot up too. ''No. She never'', she reiterated. Then pulled Jane back onto the pillow.

''Sorry'', Jane apologized for her overreaction.

''It's fine. I suppose I made it seem that way without realizing''

''Why are you so frightened then?''

''For all the reasons you mentioned before. And I know from past experiences, that having you around grounds me. It gives me clear perspective. So I think that I will be able to handle it better with you around here''

''I'll be here, everyday okay?'', Jane gathered her in an awkward hug before they split up and fell asleep.

* * *

Jane was getting very nervous. A week had gone by. A whole week and she hadn't made a dent in her plan to make her feelings known. They had caught a double homicide the morning after being at the roller rink, and it had left then with virtually no time alone. Jane spent most of that week at her place because of the mixed work schedule they had with the case. It was finally on the next Thursday that the case was solved and thankfully Cavanaugh gave them the weekend off after filing paperwork the whole of Friday.

The odds where certainly not in Maura's favour. Just when she thought she was about to catch a break, she received an email. Jane and herself had planned a relaxed movie night together and a freshly cooked home meal. They had indulged in enough take-out over the week. The detective was in the kitchen, loitering around pretending to do some actual work. She had that habit. She was what she dubbed, ''domestically-lazy''. She hated doing any sort of house work. So when she was at Maura's, she just aimlessly touched things in the kitchen pretending she was doing some good.

After about five minutes of rearranging the pans and salad bowls Maura hadn't returned to the kitchen so she called out to her. ''Her Maur….I don't know what you intend on cooking''

No answer.

''Maura'', she yelled a little louder.

No answer.

She briskly walked towards the direction the blonde had gone in, finding herself in Maura's office. ''Hey…everything alright?''

Maura was just staring at her computer screen, looking as if she had seen a ghost.

''Maura'', Jane walked over to see what had gotten her friend so worked up.

_To Maura Isles_

_Hello, this is Joyleen Yolanda Bellamy. I got your email online, I hope you don't mind. It's still a bit early, but Mother says I am supposed to start doing my packing this weekend, and I was having a hard time. I know I am supposed to bring my clothes, but what else? My mother has been very busy so I haven't got the chance to ask her, and Grandpa doesn't know either. He suggested I ask you, so I can be sure. I have a guinea pig, can I bring him? Grandpa always forgets to feed him. I was learning to roller skate also, can I bring my in-liners? I have a lot of books that I don't want to leave, but I am afraid I won't have enough room for everything. Mother says I can only bring three large suitcases, but it's not enough at all. Grandma bought me a dart board for my birthday, but mother says I should leave it. I really love it. And my favourite one direction poster is going to get damaged in my suitcases. It seems I also cannot bring all my teddy bears. And the remote control car I got from Grandpa is quite big as well. Packing is very difficult. Will I have enough space in my bedroom for all my things? _

_I hope I didn't disturb you._

_From JY_

''I was coming from the bathroom when I heard an incoming email so I decided to just check it before coming to make dinner'', Maura explained through the tears. She couldn't for the life of her understand why she was so emotional. She had never in her life been like that before. It was surprising, and very annoying.

''That is very adorable Maura. You don't have to cry sweetie'', Jane put Maura's head against her stomach since she was standing. ''she seems like such a nice girl''

''She does doesn't she''

''Yeah'', Jane ran her hands through Maura's long hair.

''What should I say to her?''

''To be honest, I have no clue. Those were so many questions''

They both laughed a little.

''I know!'', Maura practically bounced off of Jane and reached for the house phone, immediately dialing a number.

''Hello'', she said excitedly through the phone. It was strange behaviour for someone who had been crying mere seconds ago.

''_Maura, is that you dear?'', Constance responded._

''Yes mother. I hope you are well''

''_I sure am. Yourself?''_

''Managing. Would you do me a favour, if its not too much to ask?''

''_Most certainly. What is it my dear?'', Constance and Maura had resolved so much and were on much better speaking terms._

''Would you please arrange for the private jet to fly Margo and Yolanda over?''

Jane's eyes almost fell out as she heard this.

''_May I ask why?'', Constance was equally surprised._

''I received an email from Joyleen. She seems to have many belonging and isn't faring well with parting with most of them''

''_I see. That is very thoughtful of you want to help out. I will speak with Margo and make necessary alterations to their travel''. Constance wasn't a strong supporter of what was transpiring, but if there was one thing she knew how to do well, it was letting Maura be. _

''I cannot thank you enough mother. It means a lot, everything you are doing to help''

They said their goodbyes and Maura turned to Jane.

''What do I say to her now?'', she asked, sounding uber pleased with herself. Jane was torn. On one hand she was happy Maura was embracing this and was starting to feel happy about it, but on the other she was terrified something may go wrong leaving Maura utterly devastated. She decided to put the latter in the corner, and deal with things as they came.

''You better tell her the new plans then. She will be happy. You're wonderful Maur''

The doctor stood up and allowed Jane to pull her into a tender hug. She melted, she always melted in Jane's arms.

She then sat back down and began her reply.

_Dearest Joyleen_

_It is quite alright that you contacted me. Please, if you have any concerns feel free to email me anytime. It was also really lovely to hear from you, and I am looking forward to having you here. I spoke to my mother, and she shall arrange for our private jet to be of use to you for your travel. That means to say that you will be able to bring everything – within reason – that you like. Your poster will surely not be ruined, and you can certainly bring your guinea pig along. I have a tortoise myself, and my best friend has a dog. It will be quite the cocktail of pets I should imagine. Your room is also big enough to accommodate all your belongings I am sure. If not, we have plenty of room in the house that you can use. _

_Stay safe. Looking forward to meeting you. _

_Maura Isles_

''Is that okay Jane?'', Maura asked nervously.

''Looks perfect to me''. Jane couldn't help but smile at Maura's quirkiness. They both didn't even realize how Maura had said that her best friend has a dog and that the three pets will be living together. Being together was so natural to them, it only took an outsider to notice the well crossed boundaries.

Maura nervously pressed send, and the email was gone.

* * *

**AN: Is anyone else sensing disaster with Maura, Jane, and Margo under one roof for two weeks?...oh dear!**


	5. I love you

**AN: Thanks again you guys. You motivate me to write literally everyday.**

* * *

''Have you seen Doctor Isles?'', Jane asked Suzie Chang.

''Oh, she left about half an hour ago. She said to tell you to call her'', Suzie recited like a diligent school girl. She wasn't fooled by Jane's bravado, she knew the brunette had a 'thing' for her idol Maura.

''Why didn't she call me?'', Jane was already getting aggravated.

''She did Detective. You were not picking up that's why she left me with the message – in case you came looking for her''

''Okay, thanks''

Jane pulled her cellphone from her belt buckle, only to realized the devise was turned off.

''Fuck'', she swore under her breath. She had either turned it off by mistake or the battery was dead.

Jane had arranged to take Maura out for dinner. They hadn't had the time to go out in a long while, and Jane figured it was a good opportunity to try and woo the doctor. She knew she was doing a horrible job at it. She just wasn't sure what the best way to go about it was. She had never had to work on wooing anyone – it was the guys job. And seeing that she had never dated women before, she was at a slight disadvantage.

She had gone to the morgue to ask Maura if they were still 'on' for the night, since she hadn't heard from the blonde since lunch time. Now Maura had gone home, and she was realizing her battery was indeed dead, so stopped by the café.

''Hey Ma can I use your phone for a minute?''

''Good day to you too sweetheart'', Angela said sarcastically.

''C'mon Ma…..'', when Angela made no move she acquiesced, ''Okay…how was your day Ma?'', she said with faux sweetness.

Angela just indulged her stubborn daughter. ''It was fine. Here'', she handed the phone to Jane.

''Thanks'', Jane was already walking further from the prying ears of her mother in search of some semblance of privacy in the noisy café.

After three rings Maura picked up…._''hello Angela''_

''It's me…hi''

''_Jane! I tried calling you about five times. How come your phone kept going to voicemail?'', Maura said in a panicked voice._

''My battery ran out in the field. I didn't even realize until now. Was actually wondering why you hadn't called _me''_

''_Are you through there?'', Maura had sobered up._

''Yap. I'll come to pick you up at 7''. Jane's reply was chipper, so unlike her. It was a testament to how excited (and nervous) she was.

There was a pregnant pause, in which Jane wanted to die. Had she done something wrong? Did Maura no longer wish to have dinner with her?

''Maura…'', it came out as more of a warning.

''_There have been some changes. That's why I left early '', the blonde hesitated._

''What sort of changes?'', Jane didn't like the sound of things at all.

''_It's with Joyleen and Margo''_

Yap.

Jane knew it already. Ever since those two came up, there is always a certain way Maura gets when she has to bring them up in conversation. Even the silence speaks a million words.

''What is it?'', she tried to sound calm. It didn't really work though.

''_Mother made arrangements with the private jet. But Father had to use it for something, so it was only available to Margo and Joyleen at a specific time. And they didn't really have a choice besides to take advantage of it that time. Apparently Margo managed to sort her work out so she could be here at a different time. But Joyleen is having to miss out on her final week at school. I have been informed that it is alright though, since she's changing schools anyway''_

Maura rambled while Jane kept her silence. There was only one thing Jane wanted to hear from that speech. It was **when **the duo was instead coming. But that was divulged. Meaning whatever the answer was, it wasn't a good one. And when it came, it surely was as Jane had suspected.

''_They will arrive next week Friday instead'', Maura concluded. _

Jane took a VERY deep breath. Here she was thinking she had at least twenty days to sort out affairs of the heart with Maura, turns out its only seven – six in fact, the current Friday they were in was already winding down. And she doubted she had the strength to do anything this particular day.

''_Are you going to say anything Jane?''_

''Ummm, yeah. Its…ummm, good that they….sorted things out'', it sounded lame, even to her.

''_I'll see you when you get here Jane''_

The doctor didn't want to have this conversation over the phone with Jane.

''See ya' '', And the phone went dead. Jane walked over to return the device to its owner.

''Geez, you look like someone threw a bucket of cold water on you. Is everything okay?'', Angela yelled. The woman didn't even know how to keep her voice down. She was going to embarrass her in front of Maura's fancy French people, Jane just knew it.

Speaking of which….

''I have to talk to you about something Ma. Actually, Maura and I have to tell you something''

Angela smiled. She was certain they finally wanted to tell her they were sleeping together so she wouldn't be surprised if she saw them in a compromising position.

''Of course. Do you want me to come over after work?''

''Yeah, do that. Call before you come okay''

Angela smiled again. _They are afraid of being caught, she said to herself._

Clearly the two were having a completely different conversation. Normally Jane would have caught that her mother's mind was drifting in the wrong direction, but she was too caught up in her own thoughts to notice.

''See you later'', she called as she walked out.

Dinner was off Jane's mind already. She wasn't in the mood anymore. The detective was a bit of an impulsive person at times. She made some irrational, ill thought out decisions on the whim. She acted like a cranky toddler or a ten year old boy. This was her emotional side though. And it was the side that NEVER merged with her work. When she was doing detective work, she was the best. She was everything the emotional Jane wasn't. And that silly emotional side surfaced whenever it came to Maura. The blonde had the ability to make Jane things she was not. The doctor made Jane weak and strong at the same time. Jane couldn't understand it, she hardly wanted to think about it. Earlier that day she had been strong. Maura had made her strong. The detective had been elated over their dinner plans and was looking forward to having a nice time out together. But now, Maura had made her weak. Now she didn't have the zeal to do anything besides curl into a ball and cry. Both times Maura hadn't really done anything per se. Earlier in the day the blonde had just been her usual self, the same way she had now just delivered news to Jane but done nothing else.

Jane was feeling very weak and helpless now, but she would always be strong for Maura come what may. That was the definition of how Maura made her weak and strong at the same time. She wasn't going to do anything about her feelings tonight, but she was going to help Maura break the news to Angela, and inform the matriarch of how much help she needed. So instead of going to her apartment to get dressed for dinner, she drove from the precinct straight to Maura's house.

Maura was feeding bass when she heard the detective unlocking the door.

''Jane?'', she asked in surprise.

''Hey'', the brunette answered dejectedly.

''You didn't get home did you?'', she asked the unnecessary question.

''No''. Jane kicked her boots off, and placed her gun in its usual drawer.

A thought occurred to her in that moment.

''Do you think it will still be safe to leave my gun in here when Joyleen comes?''

''Interesting. I hadn't thought of that'', Maura tilted her head to the side in thought. ''I could get one with a lock, or you will just have to take it upstairs with you''

''Do you think she will be scared to see me with a weapon attached to my belt?''

''Again. I hadn't considered that. I don't think she will be scared though, maybe a little….uneasy. Who knows, she might even be fascinated''

''I think that's an even bigger problem then''

''Why?'', Maura asked, clearly not following Jane's train of thought.

''Fascination will lead her into wanting to experiment. Which can lead to accidents''

Maura placed her hand to her forehead. She was starting to feel like she was going to have a nervous breakdown. It was appearing as if she had thought NOTHING through.

''You okay'', Jane queried.

''Yes. No. I don't know. I am just trying to concentrate on breathing for a little while''

''You do that. I don't really feel like going to the emergency room right now'', Normally they would have laughed. But clearly none of them had the energy.

Jane swaggered over to where Maura was- in the living room- and pulled her closer in. She looked at her for a long while. Part of her, a very big part of her, wanted to just kiss Maura in that moment. And she knew Maura would have responded, she could see it in the blondes eyes. But now was really not the time for confusion. She wanted things to go as smoothly as possible. Kissing her was going to bring about awkward conversations and situations when Joyleen came over. She didn't want Maura to struggle with having to explain their recently changed relationship. She needed Maura to have a clear head and transition into 'motherhood' with her best friend by her side, not a 'could be lover, could be friend'.

She felt she needed to compete with Margo, but what came before anything else for Jane was Maura. She had to put aside everything else and just be there for her best friend. So that's what she did instead. She pulled Maura into her for a bone crushing hug. She didn't let go quickly. She held onto Maura. Literally feeling the small woman sink into her. Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulder and kept her arms securely holding onto Jane. The brunette squeezed her waist, feeling again how nicely they fit together. She swayed them by a fraction for side to side, feeling the blonde struggle to keep her tip toes on the ground. Eventually she let her go, pulling away slowly.

''This isn't going to go smoothly Maura''

''I know'', she hung her head. Feeling for the millionth time as if she was making a mistake of gigantic proportions.

''But I need you to understand a few things. I may have said all this before, but I NEED you to understand''

Maura nodded her head, tears on the verge of spilling out again. Jane was holding her at arms length, and she wanted to cry because she wanted Jane to pull her closer. She wanted to cry because she wanted Jane to have kissed her moments ago. She wanted to cry because Jane was so good to her and she feared she didn't deserve her, or wasn't returning the favor. She wanted to cry because once again, she was feeling out of control, and overwhelmed and confused. She really hadn't thought this through at all she realized.

''Are you listening?'', Jane asked and waited for confirmation. It came in the form of a nod again. ''I am not going anywhere, and if we mess this up we mess it up together. Ma is going to help us, so will the guys if need be. YOU ARE WONDERFUL. You don't have to change anything about yourself when Joyleen comes. She will love you just the way you are. And we will help her understand that you are new to this, so she can cut you some slack okay'', Maura smiled a little. ''Just tell me whatever you need and I will do it. Don't worry too much about this, it's going to be okay. Things will fall into place eventually''

''How do you always know what to say?''

''I don't even know if all this is what I _should _be saying. But that's all that feels true to me right now''

''You're wonderful too, and I'm sure she is going to love you as well''

They embraced again, a little more gentle this time around.

''I love you Jane''

''I love you too Maura''

It was platonic as it came out, but deep down they both meant it in a stronger fashion.

''I asked Ma to come over when she's done with work'', Jane rasped through the emotions coursing through her.

''What about dinner?''

''We can do that another time Maur. If these guys are coming next Friday we better get Ma on board soon. I really don't fell like going out anymore anyway. Unless you still wanna go, its okay you know''

''No Jane, you're quite right. It will be beneficial to speak with your mother and just call it a night. I don't so much feel like going out myself anymore''

* * *

Following her daughters instructions, Angela rang before coming over into the main house. The matriarch had what she could almost call the shock of her life. She hadn't in her wildest dreams anticipated what the two women before her were saying. With great effort, she came to understand the situation (just a little bit though).

They talked for almost two hours. Maura expressed her fears of the impending motherhood, and Angela helping to lay them at rest as best as she could. The elder Rizzoli promised to be there to assist whenever needed. It was a tricky situation however. She wanted so much to ask about Maura and Jane's relationship and where it stood. She wanted to question them about the complexity of having three woman under the same roof, given the circumstances (former lover - future lover - Maura in the middle). She wanted to scream what a terrible idea it was, but she didn't know how to branch off into the delicate matter. But in true Angela Rizzoli form, she tried anyway.

''Now Maura sweetheart, I hope you don't mind my asking. But are you ready to have Margo back into your life again?'', Angela began to ask carefully.

''She is not coming back into my life Angela. Like I said, she is just coming to help Joyleen settle and she'll be on her way''

''You are a very smart woman Maura. And when you said before that you hadn't thought this through, I believed you were wrong – I stand corrected. You actually _haven't _thought this through my dear''

''Ma...'', Jane warned.

''Joyleen is her daughter Maura. She isn't going to just drop her off here and never show up again. Not being able to live with her doesn't exactly mean she doesn't love her''

''Sure does to me'', Jane piped in. Disgust smothering her tone.

Angela just acted as if Jane wasn't even there.

''What I mean is that she is going to want to see her daughter again, and she'd going to want to call and speak with her. She may even have parenting styles she prefers for her daughter, that you may not agree with. You are going to be in each others life again through this child, whether you like it or not''

Aha!

Both Jane and Maura hadn't even considered this. So much for being intelligent adults. In their defense, Maura's mind had been plagued with 12 year old guilt and the desire to make it up however she could. Jane's mind had been invaded with thoughts of how much she wanted Maura and how she was going to keep Margo physically away from the blonde. Between that, they hadn't cast any thought into Angela's new analysis.

Jane spoke first, ''I think Margo gave away those 'parenting ideas' or whatever you call it, when she said she didn't want the child'', her voice began to raise higher now, ''she wanted to put the child into foster care Ma. Was she going to be calling the foster parents everyday to ask them what her daughter ate for breakfast? Bullshit! BULL . SHIT'', she shouted, already pacing.

''Jane'', Maura stood to place a calming hand to the raged brunette.

''I hadn't considered all of that Angela, thank you for pointing it out. When she is here, I shall be sure to set concrete rules that will avoid any problems in the future''

''Do that dear. Because co-parenting is very difficult. And it is not something you want to do with a woman you hardly know anymore, let alone with a grown child''

Jane had stopped pacing and was now sitting dejectedly on the sofa, stuck on the word 'co-parenting'. That word had popped up in her brain a few times over the week, but is was always in relation to _her _and Maura – not Margo and Maura. She felt weak again. She felt like she had lost the battle again. She wanted to cry once more. But she wouldn't do it in front of her mother and her best friend.

''I am going to take Jo for a walk, I'll be back in a bit'', she didn't even turn to see if she'd been heard. She just had to hurry before the tears started. And she made it out just in time not to be seen, but Angela knew her child. She heard the tell tale signs of tears. _Maybe what they have isn't just sexual, the woman thought to herself._

She was now alone with Maura, and she wouldn't pass up the chance to have this talk with the woman who couldn't lie.

* * *

**AN : Oh boy….**


	6. What love is

**AN: Thank you ever so much for your interest in this story**

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own Rizzoli and Isles**

* * *

''Jane doesn't confide in me. Since her father left, I think she just sees me as weak and fragile''. Jane had left, and Angela was now sitting on the couch side by side with the blonde.

''I don't think that is true. Jane is just generally reserved, emotionally'', Maura defended her best friend.

''Does she confide in you?''

''She does. But I have to pull really hard to get some things out of her''

''But eventually she does talk to you''

''Yes she does'', Maura answered truthfully.

''Do you confide in her?''

''Of course'', Maura began to feel a bit of an itch around her neck and felt the immediate need to amend her statement. ''Most times'', she added quietly.

''Who do you talk to about the other things you don't tell her?''

Silence.

''Maura…'', Angela rubbed her knee encouragingly.

''No one. I only have Jane really. And there are some things I can't say to her. Those things I just keep to myself'' She could feel the lump in her throat rising already. _Damn emotions. _

''That can't be healthy now can it?'' Angela knew exactly where she was going with this conversation. She only hoped Jane would take one of her really long walks.

''No. I suppose not''

''Would you like to tell me what's really bothering you Maura. There is obviously much more than just this issue with Joyleen''

''There is Angela, but I don't think I am ready to deal with that just yet''

''Putting it off isn't going to make it any easier. If anything, it gets worse. Talk to me Maura. You know that I have always been here for you, and I always will''

''I know Angela. Thank you so much for that''

''What's going on with you and Jane?''. She said it. She had to. They were on limited time and she didn't want to waste it waiting for the doctor to take her time. It was cruel, but she was doing it for her two girls. They needed this resolved before another party was involved and it became harder to handle.

''What?'', Maura hadn't expected that.

''Jane and you, Maura. Tell me what's going on''

''Nothing is going on. I mean…..she is a little uneasy about the situation and really worried for me and-''

''I know all that dear. But that is not what I am asking. What is happening between you two….physically''

Maura's eyes bulged out, ''NOTHING! What do you mean physically? Like sexually?''

Angela liked Maura's frankness. Jane would have never used the word sexually – ever.

''Yes. I understand that you two are…sleeping together but-''

''Whoa…what?''

''You and Jane are having sex aren't you'', Angela was now a bit confused.

''No we aren't''

''But-''

''But what?''

''Just that the other day….'', Angela began to retell how she had found them sleeping the other morning and how that confirmed her suspicions.

''I assure you, we are not having intercourse'', Maura stated firmly.

Angela couldn't argue. ''So what _is _going on then?''

''I don't know'', she ran her hands over her face multiple times, searching for an explanation but not finding one.

''Talk to me Maura. I may be able to understand''

That finally broke the doctor's resolve.

''I love her Angela. I'm in love with your daughter, but I just don't know what to do about it''

''You haven't talked about it have you?'', the elder woman lightly rubbed Maura's knee again. Trying to offer whatever support she could.

''There was just always something going on with our lives- Hoyt, My family, Tommy, Casey, Serial killer boyfriends, work, TJ, My surgery….No time seemed appropriate. And now with this Margo situation – it's even worse. I don't want her to think I want to be with her just because I am afraid of parenting all on my own. I don't want her to think it is because I am confused and vulnerable. All these feeling have been there for a very long time. Long before all of this''

''Well just tell her that then''

''It's not that simple. You know Jane Angela. I don't even know where to begin''

''It's okay sweetheart. I'm sure Jane loves you. Maybe just let Joyleen settle in then you can discuss it. That way both of you won't get too overwhelmed with things'', Angela reasoned.

''That's what I thought as well''

''Good. Let's focus on the child for now okay. It will be fine, Jane isn't going anywhere''

''I hope so'', Maura whispered.

She had been tempted to tell the brunette how she felt after Casey proposed. It was a major wake up call, and the blonde had been beside herself wondering what on earth she would do. But she couldn't do that to Jane. She couldn't take away a future with Casey if that was what Jane wanted. Love to Maura meant giving away anything for the person you love to be happy. She hated to admit it, but she had learned this from Paddy Doyle. It was the ONE lesson she learnt from her biological father. As much as she loathed Doyle for giving her up and lying to Hope, she later understood his reasoning. Her life would have been hell if Doyle had raised her. So that is how she learned to forgive her biological father, and that is how she came to understand what love was. And her love was put to test by Casey's proposal, when she stood beside the woman she loved and told her that she would support her no matter what decision she made.

To her great relief, Jane declined Casey's proposal. It was like a second chance to life for Maura. She had begun wasting away that day in the nursing home when Jane delivered the news. But as it was presently, there were no love interests for Jane. So she could wait just a little bit. She could give Joyleen a little while to settle down then she would confront the detective with her feelings. Yes, it seemed like a great plan, and she was proud of herself for the briefest of moments.

* * *

Jane took a REALLY long walk. By the time she got back, Maura was in the shower. She had texted Maura to let her know that she was alright but just needed a little time to herself. Maura wondered so much what it was that Jane was thinking of. What it was the brunette was clearing in her head. There are times when Maura feels like Jane is in love with her, and times when she feels that is not the case at all. Jane often times gets jealous and over protective, but it can be argued that that is just her nature. And on the mornings Maura takes those fifteen minutes cuddled up with the sleeping brunette, Maura is perfectly sure she feels the same. But that is Jane's subconscious, she will be asleep. So Maura came to the conclusion that Jane may have feelings for her, but she is not acting upon them because she doesn't want a relationship with her. According to Maura, what Jane wants is a friendship. And the romantic feelings surfacing are unwelcomed and being pushed back where they came from. Maura doesn't understand why, but the last thing she wants is to push Jane away.

''Hey'', Jane rasped. Her voice was funny from the crying but she was trying hard to cover it up.

''Hey yourself'', Maura walked out of the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around her, choosing to ignore Jane's current demeanor. Jane was shy in the first days, but had gotten used to seeing the blonde in this state of undress. She had even peaked sometimes when Maura only had her bra and knickers on, but had never seen anything else further than that.

''I'm gonna take a shower''. It was as if Jane had an epiphany. She just stood from the bed and ran into Maura's ensuite. She _needed _a _cold _shower. Her thoughts sometimes took a direction she couldn't stir them away from. She was glad that she hadn't showered earlier on; she desperately needed to get herself off if she had any hope of falling asleep next to Maura.

Jane haphazardly threw her clothes on the bathroom floor and walked into the shower. She quickly turned the water to lukewarm, turns out cold was just _too _cold. With the water flowing freely over her naked body, the detective, unashamed of her actions in the confines of the large shower stall, let her mind drift to the gorgeous woman on the other side of the wall. Her imagination ran wild immediately:

_Maura opened the glass door to the shower to join Jane. She padded her feet towards Jane and was standing behind the tall brunette as the water began to wet them both. Lightly, Maura ran her hands over Jane's shoulders, before beginning to plant open mouth kisses on strong shoulder blades. Maura's hands began to run down the length of Jane's body until they got to her waist. She moved her hands and let them graze the toned stomach then brought them back to her back and began travelling up again. Jane shivered, and moved to rest her head against the tiled wall in front of her. _

''_I'd like you to look at me Jane'', Maura stated firmly. When Jane didn't move, the blonde took a step back. That was enough to spring Jane into action. She turned around to face the naked form of Maura. She was beautiful, and Jane instantly felt the gush of wet juice sip out of her core. The throbbing had begun, and Maura hadn't really touched her yet. When they made eye contact, Maura took a step into Jane's personal space and confidently placed her hands on Jane's breasts. The two mounds were created to fit into Maura's small palms perfectly. She gently pushed Jane until her back hit the wall. They were no longer under the water, and Jane had absolutely nothing to distract her from the sensation of just Maura. _

_The blonde forcefully kneaded on Jane's breasts, loving the moan that escaped those thin lips. She pushed her body into Jane's and began kissing her neck aggressively. She knew Jane came faster and harder when dealt with forcefully. Her lips moved to one of Jane's erect nipples and started sucking hard on it, grazing it with her teeth as she targeted the other nipple. _

''_That's so good Maur….ahhhh''. _

_The wet kisses trailed down the brunette's sexy abs, until Maura got to a clean shaved centre. She wasted no time pulling Jane's legs as far apart as she could. She could smell Jane's arousal, and she loved it. She took a moment to savour the aroma before digging in. _

''…_oh God'', Jane gasped. The blonde had a way with her tongue. She lapped around the wet mound twice, before sucking in all of Jane. _

_The brunette was trying hard to find something to hold onto but failing. _

_Maura flicked her tongue mercilessly against the sensitive clit. _

''…_oh Maura…oh..ohh…''_

_Maura flicked and sucked harder and faster, feeling Jane getting closer to her orgasm._

''_Jane...''_

''_Ye-sss…''_

_Maura withdrew her mouth suddenly._

''_No no no, Maur what are you doing'', Jane asked wildly. She was so close, the halt was physically painful. _

_Maura stood to Jane's length so she could look her in the eye._

''_Do you love me?'', she purred._

''_So much Maura. I'm so close….please''_

_Maura thrust two fingers into Jane slowly, receiving a very loud moan in response. She added another one and begun pumping harder into her. _

''_Right th..ere''…''ohhh God''…..''please don't stop''_

_Maura increased her tempo when she felt Jane's centre begin to clench. _

''_I love you Maura….I lov-e yy-ou'', Jane repeated as a very strong orgasm took over her. The blonde shut her up with a forceful kiss. One that showed just how turned on she was by Jane's orgasm filled declaration. _

''_I love you too'', Maura whispered back against her lips. _

Jane slid down the shower wall until her ass hit the ground. She didn't have the strength to hold herself up anymore after such an orgasm. It was magic how she could touch herself imagining Maura and feel as if the blonde was really doing it. Her imagination was pretty creative and vivid. She only hoped she was quiet enough such that Maura didn't hear her.

* * *

**AN: Hmmmmm...what are you guys thinking?**


	7. Independence

**AN: This didn't come yesterday as usual. It was the weekend...*wink wink***

* * *

Eventually Jane gathered her strength and dried herself. It was only a little after 9pm but Maura was already tucked into bed by the time Jane exited the shower. The brunette quietly walked to the chest of drawers and picked out a pair of underwear and warm pyjamas. She was now feeling cold from the extra long time she spent in the shower. Carefully, she pulled the panties on. Maura was propped up by her pillows pretending to read but actually watching Jane instead. The detective feared this, because she did the same when Maura was changing. Trying to appear as casual and unbothered as can be, she pulled her towel off and swiftly put the pyjama t-shirt on. She repeated the same fast motion for the pants and, leaving her towel where it was, walked into bed. Maura always played clean up in the morning. No matter how much she told Jane, the brunette still left a trail of mess behind her. And no matter how much she complained, Maura still cleaned up.

''How was your walk?'', Maura shut her book, tired of pretending to be reading when all she wanted was to just talk to Jane.

''Refreshing'', the casual reply came. Jane placed her head atop her arms on the pillow and lay facing Maura.

''I'm a bit jealous. I haven't been out for a walk in two weeks''

''We should take a morning walk tomorrow''…..''if murder doesn't call on our weekend off'', she added.

Maura duplicated Jane's movements and they were now face to face.

''I would love that very much'', she said sincerely.

''Just not at the crack of dawn please''

''Whenever we get up Jane'', Maura smiled. It felt good to not have a heavy conversation for once.

It was short lived.

''I am sorry about cancelling dinner tonight. Would you like to go out tomorrow night?''

''It's fine Jane. We can see how we feel tomorrow and decide as the day goes'', Maura smiled again.

They just lay there, in silence for a long while, unsure of where to begin – or if to begin at all.

''I made some plans for Sunday afternoon?'', Maura broke the silence.

''What sort of plans?''

''After your mother left I went online''

''….and?'', Jane prompted.

''There are sessions held at a community hall here in Beacon Hill for 'women impending motherhood', they call it. They have sessions for pregnant woman and for adopting and fostering mothers. This Sunday afternoon there is a session for adopting mothers, from 1 – 4 pm. I saw it online and I registered to join the sessions for the next month. I feel it's something I need to do''

''That sounds like a good idea Maur. Do you need me to come with you?''

''No thank you'', she left it at that and smiled at Jane. The brunette's intentions were always right, but Maura felt she needed to do this on her own. She had had a minor evaluation of herself before Jane's return, and she was disturbed with the results.

The mistake she made twelve years ago is what led her to her current predicament to date. She had heavily relied on Margo in university. She was a loner and when Margo came around she gave herself completely to the strong force of Margo Bellamy. And when the woman had cheated on her and fallen pregnant, Maura had clung onto her regardless. She couldn't let go. Margo had been everything to her, and the thought of suddenly being without her frightened her. So she made the stupid choice of agreeing to parent with Margo, all because she didn't want her to leave. All because she didn't know how to be without her. All because Margo made her feel like somebody, made her recognized. She depended on the elder woman. And though she had told herself she wanted Margo to keep the baby because she didn't quite support the idea of abortion. It was a half truth. Part of it, maybe even a bigger part of it, was that she felt like having this child with Margo would bind them together forever.

She was dependent on Margo back then. And she is dependent on Jane now.

She doesn't want history to repeat itself.

She loved Margo, and she trusted her, but look where it got her. She loves Jane and trust her too. But no one can tell what the future holds. She doesn't want to fall victim to what happened before. She feels helpless now, and her only strength is Jane. She knows its not healthy, and that she needs to find strength within herself. Jane is supposed to help her, and support her. But she should be able to do this on her own as well.

The classes are her beginning step. She wishes she had more time, but she will have to work with what she has. It is better than nothing. The decision to do this without Jane is her first step at independence. She needs her confidence, and she needs to be able to ground herself on her own. She isn't only doing this for herself, but for Joyleen as well. What kind of mother would she be if she didn't even know what she was doing? What kind of mother would she be if she had to run to Jane or Angela for every little thing? What kind of mother would she be if she failed Joyleen? What kind of mother would she be if Jane (for whatever reason) left and she was left to face motherhood alone and unprepared? And what kind of _person _would she be if she failed _herself? _

What kind of lover would she be to Jane if she couldn't even be a decent mother to Joyleen?

She was a grown ass woman, and she needed to step up. She had gotten herself into this mess, and she needed to fix it.

''I made an appointment with my lawyer for Monday'', she whispered. Jane had just been watched several emotions pass through the blondes face, and was still wondering why she wasn't welcome to join Maura on Sunday.

''For what?'' Jane was hoping nothing had gone wrong again.

''I need to speak to him about the terms of this arrangement thoroughly. Like Angela mentioned, I don't want future complications. I want it sealed and settled before Margo leaves''

''That's a good idea'', Jane swallowed hard before asking, ''Will you be able to co-parent if it comes down to it?''. Jane asked, but she was terrified of the answer.

''In all honesty, I don't think so. Margo and I lead very different lives. Even back in university''

''How did you stay together for three years then. How did you even meet?''. Jane had made it a point till then, not to ask many questions about Maura's relationship with Margo. She simply just didn't want to know.

''We were having a fundraising for the university and it was just for basically anyone who wanted to support the cause. My roommate was doing the project and she invited me to join her. Turned out that a friend of hers was a friend of Margo. So we formed a group and that's how I got to know her. I was incredibly geeky, and much more reserved. For whatever reason, she just took an interest in me. So she started inviting me over to all sorts of things – picnics, dinners, parties. I went. It felt good to have someone take an interest in me for once. And over the holidays when my parents were always away she invited me over to her place. And it just somehow developed into a relationship. She was the first woman I was ever attracted to, and it grew into love I suppose. And just like everyone else she got bored of me. I couldn't keep up with the parties and she was so vibrant and outgoing so I let her go without me. A person can only try for so long right? She tried, I just wasn't the girl for her''

Jane wished she hadn't asked. She didn't know what to do with the information now.

So she asked something else.

''Why don't you want me to come with you to this parenting class thing?''

''I feel like I should do a few things alone Jane'', Maura was resolute in her tone, Jane couldn't counter it.

''I understand. If you change your mind though, I'll be ready and waiting''

''I know Jane, thank you''.

''It feels too early to sleep. Do you wanna watch something?'', Jane shifted to face the ceiling.

''Sure'', Maura didn't mind really. She was emotionally drained.

The detective picked up the remote that always stayed on her side, Maura didn't much care for television in bed. Jane channel surfed for a bit until she got to comedy central and just started watching what was playing. Apparently it was showing a rerun marathon of Friends, and Jane didn't really mind some Jennifer Aniston. They watched until midnight, both completely content with having a good laugh and escaping reality for a while. Maura was the first to have fallen asleep. She looked so peaceful and beautiful, Jane allowed herself some moments to just gaze at her.

''You're so beautiful'', she whispered to the sleeping form. ''You have been through so much sweetie, I hope to God this thing isn't going to be another disaster. But whatever happens I'll be here. I love you'', she placed a light kiss to the blonde's forehead and moved to turn off the light before trying to fall asleep herself.

* * *

Saturday brought with it a lot of tension, it was so thick it suffocated them - even Angela didn't want to be around her girls. After having brunch, the elder Rizzoli made a quick exit, something so out of character for her. Jane had woken up at her usual late time, around 8:30. To her surprise, Maura was still asleep. She'd busied herself for a while, think the doctor would be up in no time. But it had seemed Maura was in no hurry to wake up. So Jane had gone downstairs and began preparing breakfast with her mother. The task was done in relative silence, both parties only speaking when need be. Maura had finally made into the kitchen just after midday. The two Rizzoli's had not mentioned anything, neither had Maura given an excuse or explanation, which made everything even more weird that it already was.

''I didn't do anything wrong did I?'', Jane ventured. She'd followed Maura back into the bedroom where the blonde had slipped back into the warm blankets after eating very little.

''Of course not, why would you think that?'', Maura responded calmly, making herself more comfortable.

''Well for starters, you have barely spoke more than four sentences since you got up, at 12pm might I add''

''I just have a lot on my mind Jane, you haven't done anything wrong''

''So you're going to spend the whole day in bed?'', Jane gestured to Maura's current position.

''I think I just might, yes. I don't really feel like doing anything''

Jane thought for a brief moment, before making up her mind. ''I'm just going to take care of a few things then. See you later?''

''Yes''

Jane planted a soft kiss on Maura's temple. ''Call me if you need anything okay. Or if you just feel like talking''

''Thank you Jane''

And Jane left.

They knew each other so well. Jane had sensed that Maura needed some time alone from the moment the blonde walked downstairs that 'afternoon'. The doctor had hardly had a second to herself since everything started going on. She was either with Jane, Angela or at work. Jane knew from experience how overwhelming that could be. Just yesterday she had stormed out needing some time to herself, and she knew how great she felt on her return. Maura deserved that too. And if the blonde didn't feel like leaving her bed, then Jane would leave her house.

Maura was grateful for how considerate her friend was. The doctor hadn't missed the excuse Jane gave to leave. Maura knew Jane had lied about having something to do, just because she didn't want Maura to feel bad about wanting to be alone in her house for just one day. They looked out for each other. Even the unspoken words spoke so much. Maura feared however, that this care they had for each other could be the cause of problems one day. And unbeknownst to her- to them both- it _was_ the cause of some problems. Jane was holding back on letting her feeling be known because she had herself convinced that Maura didn't want to hear that now. Maura was also holding back because she believed that the timing was inappropriate and would be unappreciated. It was a little sad sometimes how much they cared for each other, but wonderful nonetheless.

* * *

Jane had been in her apartment for all of one hour and she was bored to death. All she wanted was to be with Maura. The detective had absolutely nothing to do. Everyone she knew was either working or enjoying their peace. Normally she would have relished this time alone, but today she just wished the day would end already. Her only option for company was Angela. And that was something she didn't have to waste time thinking about – it was a no go area.

She began to pack a few belongings. If she was going to be at Maura's for two weeks she at least needed a few more things. Bag placed by the door, she found herself with nothing to do once again. it was so bad that she began cleaning. House spotless clean, she decided to check out this group for motherhood Maura had said she was joining. The detective thoroughly went over everything until she was convinced the program was going to be helpful to Maura. What she still couldn't quite understand was why Maura had firmly stated that she wanted to do it alone. Fear began prickling through her at the thought that maybe Maura no longer wanted her involved in everything. She quickly dismissed it, that was something she didn't even want to consider. She'd have to wait for the blonde to tell her that herself.

In Beacon Hill, Dr Isles hadn't moved from her bed except to go to the bathroom. It was 5:25pm and she had spent the day in her head, conjuring all sorts of scenarios and selecting what course of action would be the best to take. She had thought of just about anything, to even the possibility that an attraction to Margo may resurface. She had considered what she thought to be everything, and as depressing as it was, she was glad that she had thought things through enough to have a better handle on whatever may happen once her ex-lover and soon-to-be daughter arrive.

She wouldn't say it out loud, but she has thrilled to hear the door open and close downstairs. Her Jane was back.

In no time at all, the brunette was opening the door to the bedroom. ''Hey'', Jane said in that deep raspy voice that echoed endlessly in Maura's heart.

''Hello Jane''

''I missed you'', Jane hated sounding sappy, but this was Maura and this was just the truth.

''I missed you too'', Maura sat up finally.

Jane slowly walked into the room, from behind her back she pulled out a plant and a box of chocolates. Maura looked at her suspiciously, but with a growing smile on her face. ''I brought you something'', Jane shyly stated, placing the plant and box of chocolates forward so their owner could reach for them.

''You got me a plant?'', Maura asked in disbelief.

''You didn't look too happy when I left, so I wanted to bring you something to cheer you up a bit. Granted a plant isn't the best way to go but…..I was in the shop, and they were there. You know the Chinese shop you bought that weird herbal tea?''

''Yes'', Maura smiled.

''The man said they are great house gifts for friends, and they symbolize long-life and bring happiness to the person you give them too. They're called-'', Jane started to pull out the plant keeping instructions so she could find the name.

''-Chinese evergreens. This is the Silver Queen variety if I'm not mistaken'', Maura cut in.

''Yeah. That's correct. And I figured the chocolate would do you some good as well''

''This is so sweet of you Jane. I don't even know what to say''

''I wouldn't mind a hug'', the 'non-hugged' begged for.

''Come here then'', Maura placed her gifts down and pulled Jane into a hug. She needed it as much as Jane did, maybe even more. ''Thank you''

''It's okay Maur. I want you to be happy. Now this China plant needs to do its trick'', Maura laughed at Jane's antiques. She didn't really need a plant to make her happy – she just needed Jane.

''I have a confession to make'', Jane said again as she pulled from Maura's embrace.

''What have you done?''

''You see, for whatever reason you are always feeling much warmer than me, so its always freezing in here. And the man from the store said the plant needs to stay in warm temperatures, above 60 degrees or something like that. So I bought it also in the hopes that you could keep the temperature higher for me _and _the good-luck plant''

Maura actually laughed out loud. Jane melted inside. ''Only Jane Rizzoli can bring me a plant as a way of telling to turn the heating up''

''Well its serving multiple purposes here you know'', the brunette defended.

''I know it is Jane. I will make sure to keep the heating up for you and my lovely 'Silver Queen' here. You do know its best for the bathroom right''

''Yeah, the man said. Figured we could spice things up a little in there while we're at it''

''Very funny Jane. So does this mean you are going to be decorating my place while you're staying over''

''Hmmmm'', Jane pretended to think. ''I'll have to see as time goes. I've never been a fan of those African masks you know. Maybe I could replace them with some sports stuff''

''Don't you dare Jane Cleme-''

''Stop right there!'', Jane did not like the middle name calling one bit.

Maura began to dig into her chocolates hungrily.

''Have you had anything to eat?'', Jane asked when she looked at her friend.

''Not since breakfast. And I didn't eat much of that either''

''I'll go make some dinner. Something quick?''

''I'd appreciate that Jane, I'm very hungry''

''Coming right up''. Jane exited the bedroom and headed downstairs to make them dinner. She hadn't really had anything herself, too preoccupied with wanting to just come back to Maura. She was pleased with herself though. As much as she had loathed being away from Maura, the blonde appeared much happier and less tense. The time the doctor had spent alone all afternoon was needed and very beneficial to her.


	8. Indulgence

**AN: Thanks to everyone following, favouriting, and reviewing. It makes me SO happy.**

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own Rizzoli and Isles**

* * *

''I'll see you later. Don't wait up for me if I am a little late, by all means go ahead and start the meal''

Jane just made a sound as Maura walked out the door. The happy bubble they had been in since yesterday was instantly popped. Maura was going to her 'impending motherhood' group thing, and Jane was feeling like a cranky toddler once again. She wanted to go with Maura, but the blonde had firmly said no. Now Jane was faced with yet another afternoon alone, before everyone started showing up for the Rizzoli Sunday dinner. _That _is not the company she wanted. She felt as if Maura and her would drift apart if they weren't together for more than one hour. It was scaring her, but there was nothing she could do about it.

Maura had cleared enough room the previous night for her to pack her clothes but Jane had been too lazy to do that. Feeling idle, she began to sort out her belongings in the drawers and closet. It was a contrast from Maura's expensive neatly arranged stuff. Jane's things were just placed there, and looked desperately out of place. She couldn't care less anyway, clothes were the last thing on her mind.

Now another thought popped into her head. God she felt like a teenager. It occurred to her that Margo was going to arrive looking impossibly gorgeous and she was going to be standing next to Maura in her sweat shirt and jeans looking like Rondo's cousin. She actually laughed at herself. She immediately made a move to leave the house. Margo and Joyleen were arriving on Friday, and once work started tomorrow, she wouldn't have the time to loiter around at the mall.

THE MALL!

She was willing going** to the mall**, all on her own. She wanted to document it for future dull days so she could laugh at herself.

* * *

The mall was packed as usual. She hated the mall, any day of the week. Detective Rizzoli had quite an impressive savings account for someone like her. She didn't make glorious amounts of money, but she never spent much either. She lived a very simple life, and most of her spendings went to bills. Which wasn't much because she was hardly at her place since Maura came into her life. And she barely did any food shopping either - eating from Maura's or from her mothers. She hadn't even spent anything on clothes if she thought about. On top of not caring, she always went shopping with Maura, and the blonde somehow ended up paying for the VERY FEW and cheap items she picked. So she had saved up a lot really. And today she was going to indulge herself for once. Jane Rizzoli was going shopping.

The lanky brunette stood at a crossroad, wondering which shop was suitable enough to pick up a few decent clothing articles. It was quite daunting now that she thought about it. Usually she'd just go to her regular shop and pick up several t-shirts or button up's of different colours and call it a day. If she wasn't doing that, she was in Maura's boutiques looking at outfits she wouldn't be caught dead in.

Steeling herself for a very eventfully boring endeavour, she walked into Macy's. Yes, _that _had to do it. For starters, she could find everything in the one shop – clothes, shoes, under garments, night wear, and accessories. The detective pulled a rolling cart as she strode into the department store like it was something she did every weekend.

She began with the shoe section. There she bought two pairs of boots. Black long, and brown short. _This has to be safe, she mentally patted herself on the shoulder._ Next she targeted the jeans section. _It is high time I buy a pair of these. _Last time she'd gotten a pair must have been a year ago. Quickly perusing through the sizes she picked up a light blue pair and a burgundy one as well, remembering how much Maura adored the colour. While walking to the 'tops' area, she passed some trousers, where she ended up picking a narrowly flared pair of khaki pants.

The tops were hard, there were so many of them and she hated having to choose from a wide selection. Jane Rizzoli always preferred the simple things in life. With Maura in mind, she pep talked herself not to drop the trolley and rush back home. Frustrated, she selected two neat sweaters, and two long soft/casual shirts. She was already pissed off and was finding absolutely no enjoyment in shopping whatsoever, so she picked up her pace. A selection of two scarfs, hat and glove pairs were thrown in and she set off for the night wear.

It immediately dawned on her how she actually owned ONE pair of pyjamas – which stayed over at Maura's by the way. She found that sleep wear shopping was much more appealing than anything else. Before she knew it, she had four pairs of pyjama's in her cart – including a very sexy nightie she found for Maura. She wasn't sure how she was going to give it to the blonde without it appearing odd, but she'd have to dwell on that later. Panties and bras were in that area and she soon found herself with four _matching _pairs. With a six pack of socks added to her shopping, the brunette was confident in calling her trip a success.

* * *

By the time she got back home (Maura's), dinner preparations were underway. Angela was in her zone and commanding the kitchen like a boss. Jane knew walking in with large Macy's shopping bags was going to be the end of her reputation. She'd rather deal with the consequences when she had the clothes on than just after buying them. A smaller bag with what she intended to wear for dinner that evening is all she came out with.

''Oh hey Janie. I was beginning to wonder where you two were. The guys will all be here in about half an hour'', Angela yelled. Even though it wasn't necessary.

Jane quickly checked her watch to find it was 3:45pm. Boy was _she _glad. Maura would be back in half an hour at least. She hadn't heard from the blonde and was dying to know how things were going at the gathering.

''Where's Maura?'', Angela asked when she saw Jane come in alone.

''She had to do something'', Jane answered discreetly.

''Will she be here for dinner? I made her favourite. I knew the poor woman needed some cheering up''

Jane smiled at her mother's sometimes sweetness. ''That's nice of you Ma. She should be here soon. If she's not, she said to go ahead and eat without her''

''Is everything alright Jane?'', warning bells were sounding in Angela's head all of a sudden.

''She's okay Ma. She just needed to do something''. Jane hadn't spoken to Maura about whether the blonde was okay with people knowing she was attending this group session. All they had agreed on was telling the guys over dinner about Joyleen's arrival.

As much as Angela was itching to delve into some of the complexities of her daughter's life(and the bag she was holding), she decided against it. There was probably going to be an enough emotional toll on the doctor and detective after spilling the news to everyone else. She figured it would be best to let the brunette's heart rest for a while.

''Why don't you get yourself settled. I've got everything under control here''

''Thanks Ma''. Jane quickly ran for a shower and change upstairs.

It didn't take Jane long to shower that day – not that ever really did. She wanted to be ready by the time Maura got back. For the first time she actually used Maura's dryer, instead of just letting her hair dry on its own. She carefully tamed it, leaving the unruly curls in a very neat format. Maura's dresser had a variety of face products and she picked the darkest shade she could find and applied just a touch to her face. She added a little eye liner and a touch of eye shadow. Lipstick was a bit too far-fetched for her, she decided to just go with lip gloss. Feeling content when she looked herself in the mirror, she emptied her Macy's shopping bag and began to dress. Her choice was the burgundy skinny jeans and the soft white buttoned shirt.

* * *

Angela gave her a silent once over when she walked into the kitchen. The Rizzoli mother could not remember the last time she saw her daughter look that good – she was speechless, and that was saying a lot when relating to Angela.

''Honey, you look absolutely stunning'', Angela gushed.

''Thanks Ma. Can you pleases not make a big deal out of it will ya''

''Sure'', Angela smirked. Jane totally knew her request had flown over deaf ears.

It was 4:35 and all the guys were walking in (Korsak, Frankie, Frost, Tommy), and Maura still wasn't back.

Ten minutes later, Lydia was coming in with TJ, and still Maura wasn't back. The guys had started giving Jane a tough time over how neat she looked. It was annoying her and she was worried about Maura too. After thinking about it for about 10seconds, she pulled out her phone and speed dialed 'one'.

''Hello Jane'', Maura picked after three rings.

''Hey….you coming?'', she asked tentatively.

Maura was quiet for a little too long. This was how Jane knew the blonde was looking for a polite way to turn down an offer of something.

''Look Maur, no pressure okay. I just wanted to know that's all. I haven't heard from you and I was just worried''

''You're wonderful Jane. I honestly don't know how you do it''. It totally came out of nowhere and bore no resemblance to the conversation at hand, but it seems Maura was just itching to let it out all day.

Jane blushed, thankful no one was there to see her.

''I'm parked by L'Espalier'', the blonde said after the pause.

''You're going to eat there?'', Jane asked, confused as to why the blonde would be at a fancy romantic French restaurant.

''They have that fine bottle of French wine I so love. I thought I'd buy one''

''Do you have twenty minutes to spare?'', Jane blurted all of a sudden.

''I don't understand Jane''

''Can you give me twenty minutes to get there….like, wait for me''

''I could, yes. But why''

''Just busy yourself for twenty minutes okay. I'll be there soon'', and Jane hung up.

The brunette left the confines of Maura's study and bounced upstairs in record time. She was glad she looked fabulous already. Pulling out one of the black expensive blazers Maura had purchased for her – against her wish by the way – she shrugged it on and bounced downstairs.

''Hey Ma'', she yelled in true Rizzoli fashion. ''Maura and I have something to take care of. We won't be back till later. Have dinner without us''

She ran out before the woman could protest, or worse, question what the pair was going to do. She opened the trunk of her cruiser and pulled out the pair of black boots she had bought. It was a dressy pair and only had a small heel, making it possible to wear it casually as well.

Driving to L'Espalier took her exactly fifteen minutes, which in total made her late by five minutes. She knew Maura wouldn't mind though. Easily spotting the blue Prius, she drove to park right beside it. The blonde was still sitting in the car, reading whatever material she had in her hand. Jane quickly jumped out, not wanting Maura to wait any longer, and rushed to open the door for the blonde.

''Hey you'', Jane rasped.

Maura stared at Jane with absolute shock, and awe.

''Jane….you look wonderful'', she breathed.

''You too Maura'', and she bravely placed a kiss on the doctors cheek. ''will you have dinner with me?'', she pulled her arm out so Maura could take it.

''How could I saw no'', she smiled at Jane. ''How you get all dressed up _that _quickly. And you put on make-up Jane. Are those new clothes?'', the questions came out of Maura's mouth like rain water.

''Let's get inside shall we, then we can talk about it''

''Of course, I'm sorry'', Maura said shyly.

''Don't be. You should know by now how cute you are when you ramble''. Neither knew where _that _came from, causing them both to blush.

The place was all kinds of fancy, and Jane started to feel a little self conscious about an attire she had deemed suitable but was now feeling inadequate. Maura of course fit in, that's why she hadn't even bothered giving the blonde a heads up. Maura was always ready to be anyway. She had on that particular evening, a silk red blouse and black skirt combo. That was paired with short black boots and a brown trench coat. She looked impeccable as ever, especially considering she had put on that ensemble before 1pm that day.

They were seated at a two-person table in the far corner of the romantically lit restaurant. The pair couldn't help but feel like it was a _date _, though neither of them wanted to bring that up.

''I've never been here before'', Jane started casually. Their wine had been served and they were waiting on their starter.

''I came here twice with my mother. She loved it''

''It is….beautiful''

''Indeed''

Their starter was served, much to Jane's delight, she had been expecting something raw and disgusting but got an appetizing serving in front of her instead.

''When did you go shopping without me Jane?'', The blonde had been suppressing the question for too long now.

''You couldn't help yourself could you?'', Jane laughed.

''Not quite, no. You look amazing. I wish you had an idea of the difference make-up makes to your face. And your hair….'', Jane began squirming under Maura's appreciative gaze. She always felt uncomfortable with compliments, and it was being made worse now by the flirtatious tone her best friend was using.

''I don't know Maura, I thought I'd try to look presentable for dinner since Ma is always giving me a hard time. And I gotta say, shit takes forever to put on. I can't commit to doing it everyday''

''Well you certainly need not worry, you're gorgeous my friend. And you look beautiful, even with the untamed hair and lip-gloss free lips''

''Thanks'', Jane blushed. She felt idiotic for not even having a similar comment to return.

Their main meal came, which they both ate with gasto. Maura had begun telling Jane all about her afternoon and how helpful her first gathering had been. She told Jane about the two friends she'd made, one woman adopting a baby and the other fostering a girl the same age as Joyleen. Maura seemed relieved and happy and excited, it filled Jane's heart with joy. As much as she wanted to be part of that, she was still exceedingly happy that Maura had made a choice that was worthwhile.

''I can't thank you enough for dinner Jane. Again, I don't know how you manage to just know what I need'', Maura said after the dessert they'd agreed to share.

''Figured you'd be tired by the time you got home, and having a house full of Rizzoli's is never a way to relax. And the selfish part of me just wanted time alone with you. I miss talking and laughing with my best friend''

Maura held her hand to heart indicating how touched she was by Jane's words, ''Ew, Maura. Don't even say it''. Jane knew the blonde was about to say something mushy but Jane had almost exhausted her vulnerability for one day, she was running on low''

''Fine fine, I won't. So tell me about your little shopping trip'', the blonde used her flirtatious tone again.

''I told you already. I was just bored and I went to the mall and ended up buying just a few things'', Jane confessed.

''If I'm not mistaken, I believe that's what they call 'retail therapy'. I bet you felt good afterwards''

''If you must know, I _did _feel good afterwards. I even bought you something'', Jane regretted the words the second they left her mouth.

_Fuck fuck fuck, she repeated to herself._

''You got me something? Wow. I should get distressed more often, you've been showering me with gifts Jane. That sort of thing makes a woman feel special detective'', the doctor flirted.

''I guess that's the point'', the brunette countered.

''I don't like to guess. Facts would be preferable''

''In that case then, my intention _was_ to make you feel special''

''Well you have succeed. Immensely''

The check came and Jane handed her card to the waiter.

''Thank you for dinner, Jane. I really enjoyed it''

''You're welcome''

Ridiculous bill paid, the pair were on their way. Jane chivalrously opened the door to Maura's Prius for her. ''Race ya?''

''No Jane. I am not going to participate in that dangerous and juvenile game you play with Detective Frost. I really wish you would stop it you know. I fear for you when you-''

''Okay Maura'', Jane stopped the rant. ''We aren't going to race home. But just so you know, it would have been the perfect ending to a perfect evening''

''The perfect ending to _my _evening would be if I had you alive before I fell asleep''

Jane smiled sweetly at Maura and headed for her vehicle. When they got home it almost 8pm. Everyone had left, save for Angela who was cleaning up.

''Hey Ma'', ''Hello Angela'', the two were all smiles as they entered the house.

''Look at you two….where have you been?''

''I apologize for missing dinner. Jane took me out. It was lovely, the-''

''Okay Maur, she gets it''. Jane could see the two women in her life getting overly excited and she didn't feel comfortable in the slightest. ''I hope you had a wonderful time Ma, sorry we couldn't be here. Goodnight''

That effectively brought the budding conversation to a full stop, Angela knowing that staying was not the best course of action. The two were in some sort of love bubble, and if she could help just by being absent, then she would.

''You both have a goodnight then'', and she left, cleaning halting exactly were she'd gotten. She knew they would only be grateful she was out of their nose.

* * *

''Where are your things?'', Maura searched frantically for Jane's shopping once they got upstairs.

''Come on Maura, you promised not to make a big deal out of this''

''I'm not, I just want to see what you got that's all''

''I left the bags in the car'', Jane said nonchalantly. She was NEVER going shopping again if it brought this kind of attention.

''Jane!'', Maura gasped, then ran out of the room, obviously heading for the detectives car. Jane wasn't going to indulge her, she ignored her, hoping the issue would be laid to rest.

Maura returned with the bags skilfully balanced in her arms. ''This is impressive Jane'', she said as she began going through the items. They were being carefully arranged on the bed as the blonde looked in awe at Jane's choice of clothing. The brunette really had good taste if she put her mind to it, Maura mused.

Just as a thought crossed Jane's mind, Maura unloaded the bag with the under garments and zeroed in on the nightie Jane had bought - which was almost non-existent. She lifted it up and looked at Jane expectantly, eyebrows raised in question.

* * *

**AN: Busted….what does Jane have to say for herself now?**


	9. Ruin me

**AN: This is the hardest chapter I have had to write so far. I never anticipated how challenging it was going to be. M rated throughout – be warned.**

* * *

''Can you please leave my stuff alone'', Jane resorted to her childish mannerism as she bolted off the bed and tried to snatch the offending material from Maura's grip. The blonde was two steps ahead of the thoroughly embarrassed brunette and swiftly ducked from Jane's efforts to take back the nightie.

''You didn't seem to be objecting over the past several minutes I was going through your 'stuff'. Why the sudden change of heart detective'', Maura teased as she ran to the other side of the room.

''Mauraaaaaaaa'', Jane whined, following her very pleased friend.

''Just let me have a look Jane'', Maura ran to climb on top of the bed as she began looking at the tag closely. ''This isn't your size Jane'', she gasped as realization dawned. ''Jane?''

The brunette wanted to sink into the earth and never see tomorrow again. ''Just give it back'', she said harshly as she jumped onto the bed to attack Maura. The doctor hadn't anticipated how aggressive Jane was going to be and before she could do anything, Jane had her pinned to the bed face down. ''I said….give it back'', Jane held her position strongly.

Maura was lying on her stomach, trying fruitlessly to save herself from Jane's strong form. The detective has lying right on top of Maura, holding her firmly in place as she tried to extract the little bit of material Maura was holding hostage between her breasts.

''Is this what you got for me?'', Maura asked, still trying to escape from Jane.

''If I said yes would you give it back and leave me alone?'', Jane relented.

''If its mine then I certainly won't be giving it back. And as it, _you_ are the one lying on me, so it is you that has to leave me alone'', she reasoned.

''This isn't fair'', Jane complained.

''Jane, just move…'', Maura pushed her ass into Jane's crotch in an attempt to get the taller woman off of her. They both grunted in pleasure at the unexpected desire that immediately rushed through them. They were both still for a few seconds before Jane pushed her hand under Maura's body trying once again to take the garment from her friend. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, her hand landed on Maura's breast. ''Are you fondling my breast!'', Maura gasped.

''Maybe I wouldn't if you'd just give that back and let me be'', Jane countered, hand still on breast.

''I would if you'd climb off of me''

Jane unconsciously slackened her weight on Maura and the blonde took that moment to turn and attempt to get away from Jane. Ever the detective, Jane reacted fast and caught Maura just as she'd turn up but not escaped yet. They lay there, Jane with both legs either side of Maura still pinning her on the bed. Maura had the nightie crumbled up into a ball in her arms now, unwilling to let go until she got a closer uninterrupted look at it.

''When you give that back, I'll move off you''. The words were said, but in all honesty, were not meant. The tone Jane used had absolutely no connection to the context of her words, it was dripping of pure arousal and she was helpless to do anything about it. The look on Maura's face told Jane the blonde hadn't even heard anything but was just staring at Jane's lips moving.

It was a heat of the moment act. It was a decision that had no time to be thought of. It was a 'now or never' situation. Jane had to man up, or woman up, or whatever. She had to act. Loving Maura meant to her that she couldn't deny Maura anything. If she had time to think, she probably would have told herself that it was a very BAD idea, but luckily there _was _no time. Maura looked at her like someone who wanted to be kissed. The doctor's chest was heaving in anticipation, hazel eyes darting from dark brown to thin chapped lips, and back again. Maura wanted it, and was waiting. Who the fuck was _she _to deny the love of her life what she so desperately needed.

Using the only weapon she had at hand – emotion – Jane traced the circumference of Maura's face with her forefinger. Maura didn't shut her eyes, she wanted to see Jane. Since there was no more talking going on, Maura needed to know from Jane's facial feature what was happening – internally that it, because physically she had a pretty good idea (she was starting to get wet and needed to be fucked by Jane – it was _that _simple).

Jane's thumb went for Maura's bottom lip, where she brushed it lightly and then repeated the action again. They were so close now, breathing in the same air. It was as if Jane was trying to memorize every feature on Maura's face, not that she hadn't already. She just hadn't ever done it _this _close.

''You are so beautiful'', Jane finally said reverently. She looked to be in awe of the woman lying beneath her, trying to say so much to her yet the words failed her. Maura didn't bother to speak, she knew she couldn't say anything intelligent if she tried. She was content to just be the object of Jane's undivided attention, and to feel what Jane was doing, and listen to what she was saying.

''Your eyes are so big and alive and mesmerising. I love to look at them in the sun mostly, when they have that beautiful shade of green''. Jane's lips touched Maura's eyelids for the first time. The blonde finally had to close them, and boy was she glad. It seemed the sense of sight had momentarily inhibited her sense of feeling. It immediately occurred to her that Jane had slightly moved so her lips could reach her eyelids. In the process, Jane's crotch had lightly rubbed against Maura's. Sadly, Maura had missed this sensation, but just the thought of it sent an intense bolt of arousal throughout her entire body.

''I love it when your face is flushed and your cheeks turn a light shade of pink'', Jane moved to kiss said cheeks. This time Maura didn't miss the sensation when Jane moved. Their crotches rubbed against each other again. Even though they were fully clothed, the feeling elicited an inaudible moan from Maura.

''Your nose is so unique, and cute. It fits your face very well. I like it when you scrunch it up trying to smell something during an autopsy. It's really sexy'', the brunette left a sweet kiss to the nose.

''And your lips, my God'', Jane breathed. She didn't even have the words to adequately express how she felt about Maura's lips. ''They just beg to be kissed'', is what she eventually fell on when everything else failed.

The hands tightly gripping the garment that had led to all of this finally relinquished their hold as Maura moved them from in-between her body and Jane's, to around the detectives neck. That simple movement worked wonders for them – effectively bringing their bodies as close together as possible. This time they couldn't hold their moans, as Maura pulled Jane closer to her.

''I've be waiting for this for SO long Jane, don't make me wait a second more'', as soon as the sentence came out, Jane had her lips on Maura's. They both didn't move immediately, as they let the years of pent up passion flow freely through them. Rapidly breathing in the same breath, feeling their noses against each other, it was as if new life was being transferred into each of them.

Jane wanted to die and live inside Maura's mouth the second the blonde opened up. She didn't even have a chance to react before the smaller woman sucked her tongue into the vortex that was her mouth. It was like walking into a candy shop for Jane, she wanted to pick the first piece she saw, but also wanted time to shop around and see everything they had on offer. Maura made the choice easy for her, she slowly sucked on her tongue, transferring every last drop of body fluid their mouths possessed. Reluctantly, she pulled Jane's face away sucking in her lower lip and letting it go with a plop.

Jane didn't understand the gravity of something she always deemed as simple as a kiss. God knows she'd had many of _those. _Its not until you have one that actually means the world to you the you begin to understand. One that instead of making you break off to breathe, you would much rather choose to die with your tongue stuck up someone's throat. Jane had a single tear running down her face. That's when she understood what a kiss really was. The only way she could define or even explain it was to say that the moment Maura pulled their lips apart was the moment she took her first breath into a new life. The kiss itself was like rebirth. She supposed that's how a baby felt after sucking in air for the first time. She supposed that maybe it was how people felt after being baptized. Her eyes had opened to a whole new world. Maybe it was a little over the top, or dramatic even, but Jane strongly felt like everything she knew about love was wiped spotless clean, to leave only the engraved name of Maura Isles.

Maura was frustrated at her inability to do justice to what she had experienced in words. Oh the sweetness of everything she wished to tell Jane, and yet nothing got pasted her tongue. As her eyes bore directly into Jane's soul, she wiped the lone tear on Jane's perfectly sculpted face and pulled her in for more. It was times infinity of everything she thought good. She felt a sudden surge of anger for why they had waited this long to bring such beauty to their lives. Jane participated more this time around, sending blood rushing to places Maura didn't even know existed in her body. The brunette ground further into Maura's body now, unable to be content with just the contact of lips. Maura was game, lifting herself off the bed to meet Jane in her efforts as well. Maura reveled in the feeling of her breast rubbing against Jane's, their hips moving in sync, Jane's thigh between her legs wreaking havoc to her dangerously throbbing centre. They both weren't sure when the shift from 'I'm found my soul mate kiss' to 'fuck me senseless' happened.

_No, Jane admonished herself. _She wanted to make love to Maura, not fuck her. There would come a time for the frenzied quickies, now was definitely not it.

She stopped kissing Maura slowly, not wanting to put an _immediate _halt to their blissful moment. When Maura looked at her with those bright and beautiful searching eyes, Jane wanted to cry all over again. How one individual could manage to be so perfect was beyond Jane. The brunette rummaged her surroundings blindly until she got hold of the nightie responsible for all of this.

''I _did _buy this for you. I can't say for sure what I was thinking at the moment, or what my intentions were, but I saw it and I just couldn't think of anyone who would look better in it'', Jane confessed breathlessly. Even the _air _she was breathing in now was different. It left pure, and much cleaner. _Stupid, I know. She had her brief internal monologue. _

''Can I have a close look at it now?'', Maura showed those dimples Jane had long fallen in love with.

''I'm just going to be embarrassed. Can you analyse it in your closet or something?''. Maura had thought they had gotten past 'prude Jane', clearly that was not the case.

''Okay. Thank you Jane'', she pecked her on the lips and squirmed from underneath her in a hurry.

Jane should have known better. She had only been lying down for a whole two minutes, replaying what had just happened over and over again when Maura returned. ''What do you think?'', the blonde said seductively, voice dripping of nothing but sex. When Jane looked up to her, it was to find Maura in the barely-there nightie she had bought.

The blonde shook her mass of hair crazily, leaving the tendrils hanging messily off her shoulders. She was bare foot, which left the detective's joints feeling like rubber. From where Jane was, she could see Maura's black thong clearly. _Had it been THAT see-through when I bought, she asked herself. _

The garment was black laced, with red heart patterns scattered haphazardly. The straps where thick, connecting with a mid-section that left a clear view of a freckled chest. It set Jane wild with fire when her eyes fell further down the blonds breasts, to find she had no bra on. The red ribbon on the upper mid part held her heavy breasts in place, discreetly showing dark-pink nipples. It was hard to miss them anyway, they were taut and protruding, and just begging to be sucked. Jane had no strength to move from her lying position. She watched, mouth agape, as Maura swayed towards her.

''You picked the perfect size detective'', she said in a sultry tone. The words might as well have burned Jane. God knows her insides were like burnt coal already. Maura didn't wait for a response, she pulled Jane's legs with astounding strength, and the brunette was now lying in front of her, feet touching the floor. Maura separated her legs skilfully and expertly positioned herself between them, before pulling Jane's hand so the brunette could sit up.

''For once I don't want to dissect the outcomes of my actions. I'm going to put all my trust in the love we have for each other – be it friendly or otherwise. I want to make love to you Jane, right now''. She moved her hands and put them around Jane's neck, while Jane put _her_ long ones around Maura's waist. ''I swore I'd never make love to a woman again….after Margo''

''Why'', Jane finally spoke. Her voice heavy with every emotion she was being attacked with, never mind the physicality's happening in her body.

''I never met a woman who compared to Margo, and I didn't want to ruin the memories I had of….her'', she said. Jane was caressing her through the thin material and it was causing her to lose her train of thought. When she started to see the emotions running past Jane's face like a slide show, she needed to stop Jane before she lost herself.

''Tonight Jane, I want you to wipe away every feeling from the last time I was with Margo all those years ago. I need you to touch and kiss every inch of my body that anyone has ever touched. I want to make new memories with you Jane, and I never want to remember ever making love to anyone else. You have to ruin me for everyone Jane, because I only want _you''. _

With that last revelation, Jane began to plant kisses on Maura's stomach. From behind, she grabbed the doctors ass to pull her closer in, groping her a little forcefully. That elicited a soft moan, which only served as encouragement for the taller woman. The kisses migrated from the stomach to Maura's thighs, Jane kissing and touching every inch as instructed. She moved herself from the bed and got to her knees, descending down the pale-skinned body before her. She planted kisses to Maura's knees, and firm calves, and continued to go down till she reached the ankles.

Turning the medical examiner around, Jane repeated the process to Maura's backside until she was now on her feet kissing shoulder blades and grazing her teeth along for effect.

''Oh Jane'', Maura moaned, turning to face the detective. Jane swallowed another moan from her as she pulled the air out of Maura's lungs in a heated kiss that produced yet another squirt of body fluids – for both of them. Then she began going down Maura's front, pulling the nightie down with her until Maura was only in her thong. Jane took a moment to admire her 'handy work', before finally taking a stiff nipple into her warm mouth. ''Ahhh'', Maura moaned again. Her nipples had gotten increasingly sensitive from how erect they were.

''I want to feel you Jane'', she panted. A loud groan escaped her lips as Jane withdraw the contact. The blonde wished there was a way Jane could disrobe with her lips glued to her body.

Feeling impatient, Maura tugged on Jane's shirt, blindly fumbling with the buttons to rid her detective of the offending garment. The shirt was gone in record time, and so were the jeans, leaving Jane in just her bra and underwear. ''You're exquisite Jane. You have perfectly formed musculature and such lovely tanned skin'', Maura said as she smoothly ran her fingers over Jane's upper body, targeting her back and unclasping her bra. ''These'', she delicately massaged the two mounds, ''are stunning''. Jane couldn't suppress her moan. She placed her own hands over Maura's soft one and aided the blonde in applying more pressure.

Their lips met again, like opposite ends of magnets. Jane grabbed Maura's thighs and hauled the smaller woman, delicately placing her on the bed. She began sucking at a particularly sensitive spot on the freckled neck, earning herself an impatient groan.

''Take me Jane. I want you to have all of me'', Maura pleaded. Jane, it turned out, was more reserved in bed. It may have been because it was the first time with a woman, or that she was just generally that way. Either way, she'd barely said anything since the clothes were shed and had just obeyed Maura's commands. However, they were too far gone to analyse that shit at the moment – that would be done later, and dealt with accordingly.

Maura felt Jane's panties and wanted nothing more than to set them on fire for being in her way. She reached out and began pulling them off.

''Maur, I've….uhhh''

''….never done this before'', the blonde finished for her.

''Yes'', Jane said guiltily.

''It's okay Jane. Just take these off. I will tell you exactly what I want''. At this point, Maura expected a sarcastic comment to be thrown in, or a little bit of teasing at least. Something along the lines of her bossiness. But nothing came.

Jane was the type of person who took sex seriously. She didn't sleep with anyone unless she at least trusted them, and had some sort of connection. She didn't engage in 'casual sex' AT ALL. She was feeling overwhelmed and flooded with emotions. Never mind the fact that it was with a woman, who happened to be her best friend and love of her life. Add to that the circumstances surrounding their lives at the present moment. The normally proud, brave, and confident detective was feeling insecure and inadequate. But her body was telling her two things – she was super turned on, and she needed to listen to Maura's instructions.

By this time, Jane's panties were off, and Maura was pulling off her own thong. ''Touch me Jane. Your hands feel so right against my body'', Maura ground harder into Jane's center, loving the little bit of friction. The blonde had her smaller hands covering Jane's ass and pulling her in as much as she could. _She, _as it turned out, was more vocal and demanding in bed.

With one hand massaging a breast, Jane braved to send one south bound where it met a VERY wet center. ''Oh my God'', she said almost to herself.

''Yes Jane. That's exactly what you do to me'', Maura ground into Jane again. ''Before tonight, you could get me this wet without even touching me''

Jane was feeling her core throb in all kinds of ways that were leaving her hot and bothered. She hardly knew what to do with herself. ''Yes Jane'', Maura purred as Jane made the first contact with her wet lips. ''Keep going Jane. Wipe away every memory of anyone who's ever touched me''. That was enough motivation to get her going, even though she'd never done it before. She just went with what she enjoyed being done to her.

Her fingers slid up and down along Maura's folds. The slippery sounds only made it that much more enjoyable. ''that's right Jane…..keep….going''. Jane took sometime feeling Maura's vagina. Her fingers explored tenderly, earning her some gasps when she grazed the swollen clit. ''Go inside Jane….please''. And Jane did. One digit slipped in effortlessly and Maura moaned loudly. ''Another one'', she panted, chest heaving. And Jane added another finger, and of their own volition, another digit followed. ''Oh God Jane….move them faster….it feels SO good'', Maura screamed as the glorious sensation of being filled washed over her.

Jane rested an elbow on the bed for better leverage, as she pumped into Maura's center faster. ''Go deeper inside Jane….as deep as you can'', Maura begged.

Jane wasn't entirely sure if what she was doing was right, but she went with the sounds she was getting from Maura, and boy was the doctor screaming her name. Whatever she was doing must have been right.

''I want to do this with you Jane'', she cried out. ''I want to cum with you. Let me touch you please'', Maura said and began to slip her hand between their bodies so she could get to Jane's center.

''Wow'', was all Maura could say when she felt Jane's drenched folds.

''That's what _you _do to _me''_, Jane rasped, voice hardly recognizable even to her own ears.

''Do what I'm doing'', Maura instructed. She was circling Jane's hard clit, and the brunette was beginning to lose her bearing a little from the sensation. ''Just do what I'm doing Jane…..I'm so close…'', she panted heavily.

They were both moaning out loud now, each trying so hard to please the other while feeling tingling's all over their body. ''I'm gonna cum Maura….oh God….I can't…'', Jane began to shake. Maura had felt the strong constrictions around her fingers already. Whatever orgasm was coming to Jane was going to be a mighty powerful one. And from her constrictions, she knew her orgasm was going to be nothing short of blinding. Hearing Jane confess that she was seconds from a release was a turn-on on a whole different level for the doctor.

''Maur….'', Jane began to writhe above Maura. The tingling began in her toes and spread throughout her body at lightning speed. Her heart was almost out of it confines when Maura said...

''I'm cuming Jaaaaaaaaane….''

''…aaahhhhhhh'', they both screamed as a giant wave of orgasm blinded them.

Jane didn't feel the tears, but saw them as Maura wiped her hand over her cheek. They both had the type of orgasm that leaves you weepy, limb, sweaty, and tired as fuck. Jane slowly rolled off Maura and lay facing the ceiling like her partner, both catching their breath.

* * *

**AN: This is really one of those times when I desperately want to know how this panned out…..please tell me.**


	10. Making up

**AN: Sorry its late and short, had a presentation to prepare. I enjoyed reading all your kind words, thanks a million you guys. **

* * *

Jane used the shower in the guest bathroom for the first time in years, if for nothing else than the few minutes alone with her thoughts. When she finished she put on a pair of pyjama's and went back to the master bedroom. Maura was not yet done, so she quietly snuggled into the warm bed, wondering how she was going to begin her conversation with her best friend.

When Maura emerged, _unprovocative _night wear in place, she slid into the blankets as well. They lay facing each other, when Maura decided to start the talking process.

''I don't quite know how to proceed from here'', she admitted.

''Don't you think you should have thought about that before you took your clothes off'', Jane spat back.

''Well you should have _thought _before your bought that lingerie for me'', Maura shot up from the pillow. The conversation was definitely taking a turn for the worst. Neither had expected the anger. They didn't appear upset when they where lying in silence. It's just that when their mouths opened, heated words fell out of nowhere.

''Excuse me!'', Jane gasped, sitting up as well. ''you'', she pointed at her, ''are the one that was going through my fucking shopping. You should have just left it alone when I told you to''

''What are we fighting about here Jane? That we had sex or that I don't know what to say, bec-''

''No!'', Jane put her hand up. '' You did your share of talking _during _sex''

''So you are upset with me'', Maura stated.

''Gee, who would have guessed''

''Your sarcasm is not welcomed right now Jane''

''Of course, because _you _said so. Never mind what Jane wants'', the brunette's childish behaviour made its appearance once again. Jane Rizzoli was a classic example of the work done by Psychiatrist Eric Berne - she represented and exercised the **'three ego states'** perfectly. Her **parent ego** showed when she was with her friends/work partners/family. In this case she portrayed her beliefs and showed her caring and sympathetic side. At work, her **adult ego **always ruled. She was nothing but logical and analytical. And then came her **child ego**, where everything was based on childish emotions. Which are usually of the unflattering kind : impulsive, eager to please, self centered, angry. And this particular ego state was in action when she was with Maura.

Maura watched her intently, wondering what had set the brunette off like that. She drew blanks, it really just came out of nowhere.

''What are you implying here Jane. Are you trying to say I _made _you sleep with me?'', Maura asked in utter shock.

''I don't know. I'm gonna go'', Jane jumped out of bed and started for the door.

''Jane'', the name was like a spear thrown through her chest. '' If you walk out of this house, don't come back''

''What?'', Jane whipped her head around.

''If you walk out of here, I am going to take it to mean that you regret sleeping with me, and you don't care about me enough to want to discuss it _maturely_''

''Mau-''

''That's final'', Maura tucked herself back under the blanket. And Jane walked out, slamming the door behind her.

When she got downstairs, she headed for the kitchen and slumped on the stool. She hated herself instantly, how could she do that to Maura? Well she knew why anyway. She was afraid. Afraid of this new bond that had been formed between them was. Afraid of how strongly she felt for the blonde. Afraid that they did it too soon. Afraid that this was going to get complicated when Joyleen arrived. Afraid that things were going to turn sour in light of Margo's presence. Part of her was even afraid that she may not have performed to par. She was generally just afraid, so she lashed out at the woman she loves.

Maura was still in bed. She refused to cry over this. She had done everything right, and Jane had no business accusing her of anything. She was furious, and for the time being she meant what she said, if Jane left, she didn't want her coming back.

_She's right, Jane told herself. If I care about her I shouldn't leave, no matter how terrified I am. If I go, it does come off as regretting what happened, and God knows I don't. I'm just scared, and I should talk to her about it. _

Jane began making a cup of Maura's favourite tea. She set two cups in a tray and put a saucer of biscuits on the side. Gathering up all she had, she headed back to the bedroom with her peace offering. She lightly knocked, then pushed the door open with great effort because of the tray in hand.

''I brought tea'', she said in shame.

''Thank you''. Her voice was flat. She then sat up and accepted the cup amicably.

''I'm am an asshole''…''And I'm allowed to swear this time, because it's the only word that fits''. Maura turned her lips up a little, sipping on her hot beverage. Jane was sitting at the edge of the bed, trying hard to find the finest words to use. ''What I said was wrong. I should never have used that tone with you, you have done nothing to deserve it'', she swallowed hard. ''Making love to you was one of the best things that's ever happened to me. It's a dream come true actually, and it's something I can NEVER regret Maura. I want to do it again and again, for the rest of my life. I'm just afraid, so I lashed out at you''….'' A little insecure even'', she added quietly.

''I understand Jane. But don't ever walk out on me when you feel that way. I'd rather fight with you here, than have you miles away ignoring me''

''I understand, and I'm so sorry Maura. Its not going to happen again I promise'', Jane said sincerely, glad she had been understood.

They sipped on their tea for a little while, both unable to come up with something relevant. When the silence had gone on for too long, Maura began. ''What does this mean in terms of our relationship status?''. She wasn't one to make beating about the bush a norm, she much rather preferred to get straight to the inevitable point.

''I don't know'', was all Jane offered.

''I don't know either Jane, but me asking you is means of better defining the situation''

''Do we have to label it just yet?''

''If it was any other day Jane, I would have said no. But given the circumstances and the pending situation, I would venture to say it is required that we indeed attach a name to what is happening'', Maura said as she munched on a biscuit and sipped on her tea.

Jane sighed heavily, clearly not ready (or willing) to label themselves yet. It was an even bigger issue for Jane, given that it was also going to be an entire identity change – from heterosexual to…..bisexual?...or homosexual?. She wasn't even sure. Despite popular opinion, Jane was completely straight until Maura. It may have been that she suppressed her gay feelings just to prove everyone wrong. Bottom line is that she had never been with a woman. In any case, she hadn't found one that was worth the effort of dissecting her sexuality. But Maura was, so now she was faced with having to deal with closeted issues.

''I don't know what label to put to us Maura'', she said sadly. She _really _didn't know.

''Can we at least try to figure it out….preferably now''

''I don't want you to take this the wrong way Maura'', Jane said seriously. ''But the reason why I didn't want this to happen was because of the problem we are in now – having to define it. We have FOUR AND A HALF days before Joyleen gets here. What do we tell her?''

''We tell her whatever it is that we agree on right now'', Maura reasoned.

''Sure….'hey Joyleen, this is my best friend turned girlfriend four days ago'…'', Jane said sarcastically.

''Those roles are not mutually exclusive Jane. Being my girlfriend doesn't mean you are no longer my best friend''

''That's not the point Maura'', Jane raised her voice.

''Well what is?'', Maura returned equally as loud.

The brunette placed her tea cup down and rubbed her face vigorously. ''You don't want to start motherhood, and a relationship at basically the same time''

This got Maura thinking. She didn't respond, Jane had made a fair point.

''The pressure is going to be too much. Balancing your time with me, and your time with Joyleen. Trying to please two very different people who have equally important roles in your life. How do you explain to a twelve year old you've just met that you are in a four-day lesbian relationship with your best friend who is just staying over for two weeks? What role do I _then _play in her life?''

''I hadn't thought of it that way'', Maura whispered.

''Well you do that then!''

''Jane…don't yell at me please. This isn't easy for either of us''

''I'm sorry'', Jane said once again that night.

They shared a silence once more, while the doctor mulled over what her friend had said.

''So we don't have sex again until she's settled and we can explain our relationship better to her?'', Maura asked quietly.

''I didn't say that'', Jane very nearly shouted again.

Frustrated, Maura raised her voice again, ''So what _are _you saying? You seem to want to have sex again, but are reluctant to label us lovers…..what are you saying Jane?''

''Sorry Maur…this isn't coming across well at all. I don't know people who fight after sex, its usual _before'', s_he chuckled humourlessly.

''Right…make-up sex'', Maura stated.

''Okay'', Jane slapped her hands on her thighs resolutely, deciding she just had to open up and be honest ''I can't promise to sleep next to you on this bed for the next three weeks and not make love to you again. That isn't possible. I could go back to my place, but that isn't the best solution either – it will still happen. And besides, I promised to be here while Margo is around'', Jane breathed in deeply before continuing. ''What about remaining the best friends that we are for now. And if we sleep together again that's fine, it is what it is. When Joyleen comes I'll just be the best friend I always was, and then when things settle down a bit we can then work on building a proper relationship''

''If I didn't know any better I'd say I'm being used for sex here''. Maura was facing down and Jane took it seriously.

''Oh my God Maura, you know I would never-''. She was cut off by the blondes laughter. ''Heeeeey'', she threw a pillow at Maura's face, which the doctor caught in time. ''That wasn't funny''

''Well now you know what your humour is like at times''. They both laughed, enjoying the dissipating tension.

''It sucks when you're this side of it''

''Well there you go Detective''

''So are we good?''

''I suppose. What do we tell Margo if she asks?'', Maura asked tentatively.

''That its none of her business'', Jane responded immediately.

''Jane! She is going to be leaving her child, I think she has the right to ask about our relationship status''

''I don't know….we tell her we _aren't _in a relationship. Because technically we aren't right?''

''Right'', The word came out painfully from Maura's mouth.

''It's not her concern whether we are sleeping together or not, okay? _We_'', she gestured between the two of them, ''are trying to figure this out. And we deserve to do it on our own terms – alone. People get to know once we figure it out. So when we define this, that's when we tell everyone. We just have to keep the….you know…kissing and stuff behind closed doors''

''I see your point'', Maura didn't look happy.

''Look. Maura, look at me baby'', Jane moved from her position to go closer so she could lift Maura's face to look into her eyes. ''Don't confuse this as me not wanting to be with you or anything along those lines. Its just the situation that's all. I just want things with Joyleen to go smoothly. You know I ain't going anywhere, so there's nothing to worry about. And we can still make love whenever we want'', she finished with a smile.

This seemed to appease Maura, who smiled genuinely in return. ''I love you Jane'', Maura caressed Jane's tanned cheek with her hand.

''I'm guessing I didn't tell you _that _did I. I love you too Maura. I'm in love with you. You are amazing, and I love you just the way you are – everything about you. You have the most wonderful heart, so kind and generous. Thank you for putting up with me all these years. I can't wait to be in a proper relationship with you, to call you my own and kiss you wherever and whenever I want'', she demonstrated by pulling in the blonde for a passionate kiss. ''My mother wont be happy to hear that her only daughter has fallen in love with a single mother'', she joked.

At this, Maura laughed out loud. She was proud to be in love with a woman such as Jane. ''I'm glad I have you to make me laugh Jane. Your humour is pretty pleasant if exercised appropriately''

''Come here you. I think its time for that make-up sex you mentioned earlier''

Jane gently pushed the blonde into a lying position and got on top of her. Her hands immediately landed on the blondes abundant bosom, causing Maura to moan out loudly as Jane kneaded them powerfully. ''We're going to have to work on tuning your volume Dr Isles. There's going to be a kid in here soon''.

Maura was inexplicable turned on by Jane's returned confidence. Practice _did _make perfect, and it helped that the detective was a very fast learner. The brunette had not missed that freckled zone on Maura's neck that made her lose all her modesty. Jane sucked on it really hard as her hand continued its ministrations on the full breast.

''Oh Jane'', she moaned. ''Keep going'', she begged not wanting Jane to remove her lips from that very arousing spot.

''I didn't intend on stopping baby….''. Maura began grinding into Jane, seeking whatever more contact she could. And just like before, they both loudly moaned at the friction against each other's sex's.

''Take this off me'', Maura pulled irritatedly at her night wear.

Jane made quick work of disrobing the blonde and then herself, before falling into yet another session of phenomenal love-making: less instructions this time.

* * *

**AN: The earliest I can get the next chapter out should be Sunday night (my time) - if all goes well.**


	11. Expectations

**AN: I fear there may be a developing ''Jane hate club''. Please don't hate her...I'll fix her.**

* * *

Monday morning came faster than expected. When Maura's alarm went off, she didn't have to hide how much she enjoyed being in Jane's embrace, neither did she have to pretend to still be asleep. She took her usual fifteen minutes of solitude, but today she replayed the previous night in her mind. The memory set little flutters in her stomach alight. Jane was just as good in bed as she had imagined, and the brunette _had _indeed ruined her for everyone else. She knew it would take nothing short of a miracle to get her to one day even consider sleeping with anyone else. Jane set the bar really high; it was unattainable to anyone else on planet earth.

At 7am she finally slid out of bed and went for her shower. The detective was moaning and groaning about getting up by the time Maura was done. ''Prolonging this isn't going to help you Jane'', they went through their usual morning banter. It was the same every morning – Maura trying to get Jane to awaken, Jane clinging to fruitless hope of more time to sleep.

Begrudgingly she headed for the en-suite while Maura dressed up. ''Did you water the plant?'', Jane called out from the bathroom. She was looking at the variegated green leaves, feeling mighty pleased with her purchase.

''Of course I did. I'm not like you Jane''

''Like me'', she gasped. ''What am I….the plant neglecter?''

''No, just someone who forgets little things like those'', they bantered back and forth as they went about their rehearsed morning routine.

Maura left immediately after finishing. She needed to start early, because she had a long lunch break in which she had to meet with her lawyer. They shared an adoring parting kiss in the kitchen, failing to notice Angela's eye on them.

''I take it you two have…'', Angela flailed her hand, unable to land on the right word. Jane was startled, as she had not seen nor heard her mother enter the house.

''Ma….'', Jane sighed.

''I'm not gonna bother you about it sweetheart, it was a long time coming''.

Jane sighed again.

Angela was watching her daughter intently and knew something was off with her, she only hoped the stubborn brunette would let it out – if not to her, to someone at least.

''Talk me Janie'', she rubbed her shoulder encouragingly.

''Don't worry about it'',Jane responded, sounding slightly dejected.

''Jane'', Angela announced sternly. ''Do you think so little of your mother? Do you really think there is nothing I can say that can be useful to you?''

''You know I don't mean it like that Ma'', Jane pleaded with her hurt mother.

''Then try me. See if there isn't anything an old lady doesn't have to share''

''You aren't old'', Jane smiled.

''Most times I think that's how you see me''

''I see you as _old-er, _not old''

Angela pulled her daughter over to the breakfast stool so they could have a quick heart to heart before work. They both still had about thirty minutes before having to leave the house.

''I fucked up with Maura'', she confessed.

Angela watched her, confused to no end. ''Do you mean to say you _fucked her?_''

''Ma!'', Jane admonished.

''Well I don't understand. How could you have fucked up. I mean, she just left and you two seemed all lovey dovey – kissing and all''

''Yeah, well that's part of the problem''

''Just tell me what's going on Jane'', Angela probed.

''We….uhh….we slept together last night'', Jane paused, to let her mother take it in and respond. The first part is all that happened. ''I said we….you know….slept to-''

''I heard you. I'm just waiting for you to say what the problem is'', Angela said with an air of patience she didn't possess.

''We had sex, then I told her I didn't want to be in a relationship with her, then proceeded to have sex with her again''

''Hmmmm'', Angela said thoughtfully. ''She seemed to be okay when she left though''

''Yeah. I know she is okay with it, she wouldn't lie to me if she wasn't''

''But…..'', Angela pressed.

''I don't know. I feel confused. We talked about it and decided it would be a smoother transition with Joyleen if we didn't have a fresh romantic relationship in the way''

''That seems sensible''

''Yeah'', Jane sighed again.

''So why the long face honey?''

''I don't want to make a mistake. Do you understand? I don't want to regret this. Because I'm going to be living here until Margo goes, and we said we're still going to be sleeping together. The only thing is that we wont actually _be _in a relationship. Does that even make sense? Are we just stupid Ma?''. It had been a really long time since Angela saw her daughter plead in such a manner. She could tell how torn, and hurt, and confused her little girl was. All she needed was a third opinion, an outsider who could tell her that she and Maura weren't totally bonkers. Maybe another perspective could help.

''How does Maura feel about all this?''

''She wasn't too pleased when I suggested it at first, but I think she gets it''

''I'm going to throw in my two cents, and promise not to be mad at okay''

''I'll take anything I can right now Ma''

''You and Maura have been best friends for years now, which is a perfect foundation for a relationship. But don't get confused Jane, it will be a **relationship**. You know how some people say 'oh what's the big deal with labeling things, lets just go with it?' ''

''Yes''

''Well there actually IS a big deal. When you label something, it automatically has certain expectations attached to it. Once you and Maura name what you have as a 'relationship''',she used air quotes, ''It means what you expected from each other before as best friends has altered now. With that change, comes different demands and expectation. Do you understand me Jane?''

''Yeah'', Jane responded like a child learning her favourite subject.

''So I want you to know that you weren't wrong in declining the beginning of a relationship just yet. Imagine the commotion when you expect Maura to spend the whole of your afternoon off with her but Joyleen wants to be taken to the cinemas or something?'', Jane nodded. ''It's little things like these, it doesn't have to be the very big things. But when two people as in love as you and Maura are start a relationship, I would think you would want to spend each waking moment together'', Jane nodded again. ''But it will be hard for Maura to meet your demands and Joyleen's demands simultaneously – one of you will suffer. So yes, you made a wise decision''

Jane instantly felt relieved and thought all was well, but Angela began to speak again.

''However, there is one flaw in your reasoning. And that is mostly on your part Jane''

''What?''

''If Margo wasn't coming along, I would say things are going to be just fine. But I can't say that now Jane. Speaking as someone who had seen better days, some feelings may surface between Maura and Margo'', Jane instantly paled. She looked like she was going to throw up at Angela's words. ''Maybe there is nothing to worry about, but you can't know until it is actually happening. Maura isn't a deceitful person, its not her I am worried about. Its you honey. You need to ask yourself if you are ready''

Jane no longer responded.

''Sleeping with Maura doesn't hold much weight. Are you going to be able to handle it? Not having a claim on her I mean''

Jane still didn't respond. She just sat on the stool, staring at the same empty spot on the flat surface in front of her.

''I know now that you love her, and you want to make things as painless as possible for her. But think of yourself too. If you continue with what you are doing, you need to commit to it. And you need to be prepared for whatever outcome. Through everything that will be going on, Maura is going to say and do some things you are not going to be happy with. And you need to be prepared to know that you won't be able to fight her from a lovers or partners perspective. You will only be 'the best friend'. And because you are sleeping together, you are going to feel as if you have certain rights to her – that you won't have, just so you know. And hearing those words from Maura is going to hurt really badly Jane. I'm not saying you need to tie her down or gain some sort of control over her by being in a relationship with her now. No, that's not what I mean. All I'm trying to say is that you need to make your decision, and be able to deal with it throughout everything. It could _really _go wrong if you two aren't careful''

Jane wanted to run, but her feet felt like lead.

''You know how terribly she feels about abandoning Joyleen, and you know as well as I do that she is going to go out of her damn way to do anything under the sun that she can to make that child happy. She loves you too baby, but I don't want you in the cross fire of it all. It's going to be hard and confusing for her too, don't forget that''

Angela waited for her daughter to say something, but she didn't.

''I have to head to work now. Stop over for something to eat okay'', she kissed her daughter on the forehead and left her to her thoughts. Part of her felt like it was an evil thing to do. But she loved her daughter, and what kind of help would she be if she didn't tell her daughter all this?

Left alone, Jane finally cried. It was an emotional overload, and it didn't help that it was Monday and she needed to be at work in half an hour.

When she sobered down she quickly made an attempt to look presentable before leaving. She hadn't thought much, she'd mostly just cried – for what, she wasn't sure. She just wanted it all to go away, everything. She wanted to run, but she couldn't bail on Maura. Not after she'd promised to be there.

Thankfully, (not that she condoned murder) she was called out to a crime scene before even making it to the precinct. It was the sort of distraction she needed. Then it dawned on her that she was going to be seeing Maura for the first time at work after having sex. She wasn't sure how she was supposed to act. All those thoughts went flying out the window when she spotted Dr. Pike just as she pulled up.

''Where's Maura?'', she asked without so much as looking at the scene before her.

''Had something to attend to'', Frost responded. Him and Korsak saw Jane was vexed just by the way she opened her car door and were in no mood to increase her temper. Pike knew better than to even offer a condescending remark.

**You ok – J. **She texted Maura.

No reply came as they began to process the scene. She was getting even more frustrated by the second. It was in that moment that she understood exactly what her mother was trying to say about expectations. Normally she would have just gone about her business and waited to find out what Maura had been up to, later. But now, no. She wanted to know where Maura was and what she was doing, _immediately. _Normally, it may have worried her just a little. But now she was furious. Wondering if Maura was planning other arrangements without her knowledge. It was juvenile, even to her, but she couldn't help it.

The guys had been alerted by Angela at dinner the previous night about Maura's situation. And seeing how on the edge Jane was, they didn't dare utter a word about her mood. They just went about their business, ignoring her sour state, because they knew that's what the brunette preferred.

She was leaving the scene when Maura finally texted back.

**I am alright Jane, why? – M**

''Are you fucking kidding me?'', she said to herself.

**I'm guessing it never occurred to you that I would worry that you didn't show up and are God knows where – J**

Jane picked up her phone on the second ring, ''Yeah'', she rasped.

''Hello Jane, I'm sorry I got caught up''

''Sure'', Maura didn't even catch the bitterness in Jane's tone.

''My lawyer had a family affair he needed to attend to and the best time for him to meet me ended up being this morning. By the time dispatch called I was in his office so I had Dr Pike fill in for me''

''Why didn't you say anything?''

''It all just happened Jane'', Maura answered obliviously.

''But still'', she persisted.

''Jane, I wasn't aware I had to inform you about every little detail about my day''

Jane was silent. She knew she had no right, just as her mother had warned her. And she knew she had been childish lately, and lashed out at Maura more than was warranted. ''Can we talk?'', she eventually said.

''Of course. I am on my way back, do you want to come over to my office before you proceed with the case''

''Sure''

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Jane was walking into Maura's office with a bouquet of flowers looking guilty as ever. She closed the door behind her and strode to Maura's desk.

Maura quietly took the flowers looking amused. She plucked the card out without saying anything and began to read out loud _''I love you Maura, and I know I don't say it as much as I should, as much as you deserve to hear it. I'm sorry for my behaviour of late. I act like an ass, and always feel terrible after. Don't forget that you're loved, so very much. Jane''_

The blonde stood up and pulled Jane into a kiss she had been dying to give her since walking out of the house.

''Please don't use such vulgar language, written _or _spoken, in Joyleen's presence. You ought not to use it in anyone's presence anyway'', Maura warned kindly.

''I better start learning right'', Jane offered a weak smile.

''I realized after I got off the phone that you were very upset. What's the matter?'', Maura asked looking directly into Jane's soulful eyes.

''Sit with me'', Jane guided them to the couch were she began to retell parts of her conversation with Angela that morning. She told only the parts about being in a relationship and having different expectations as opposed to just best friends.

''I'm not saying to do anything about it. As in to change what we talked about last night. I just want you to understand why I was upset this morning. And why I may be upset again at a later date. I am trying to handle this better, I swear''. Jane didn't want to mention everything else to Maura because she hadn't made a decision yet. She just wasn't sure about a lot of things. And better for her to be unsure on her own, that to drag Maura along with her.

* * *

A murder had to be solved, so that's how they spent the rest of the day.

Murder unsolved, they called it a night and headed home. It was to find Angela setting up the table for dinner when they got home. Jane's heart almost exploded out of her chest, scared to death that Angela was going to begin to say to Maura all she had said to her. Seeing the look of utter fear on her daughters face, Angela gestured that she wasn't there to talk about what Jane was afraid of. Relief instantly flooded the brunette, as she began to tend to Jo Friday while Maura helped Angela set dinner.

They enjoyed a light conversation with their meal. And Maura shared the details of the documents she's written up with her lawyer, before Angela called for their attention. ''I wanted to talk to you guys about something''

Jane begged with her eyes again, but Angela just shook her head. ''I was thinking that I'd like to stay over at Jane's apartment when Joyleen arrives''. It didn't go unnoticed that what Angela wanted to say was 'when Margo is around'.

''You mean while Margo is here?'', Maura called her out on it.

''Yes'', Angela said truthfully. ''I know I am popular for my 'meddling' as you call it, but I like to think of it as 'caring'. I figured you guys will better solve things without me in the process''

''A move won't be necessary Angela. If you'd like to keep some distance you could just stop coming over as frequently as you do, no need to move'', Maura reasoned.

''It doesn't seem as if it's necessary now, but just in case, I'll just be out of the way. If you need me for anything you know I will be here in a heartbeat''

''Thank you Angela. If you do change your mind at anytime, the place will be untouched and waiting for you''

They smiled at each other. Jane seemed to just be a spectator, she hadn't voiced her thought as yet.

''Jane'', Maura prompted when she saw her brunette was lost in thought.

''Yeah sure Ma, use my place''

''Well then, I'll move on Wednesday. I'll ask Frankie or Tommy to help with anything I need. I'll be off to bed now'', she stood and gave her girls both a hug and kiss goodnight before she was on her way.

* * *

''Why do you think your mother wants to leave?'', Maura queried as they got ready for bed.

''Doesn't want to be involved in the arguments'', Jane snorted.

''Are you really expecting the worst from Margo's visit Jane?''. Maura's tone had turned really serious.

''I don't know Maur. I don't even know what she looks like. Have _you _even seen Joyleen? Have you even seen Margo since twelve years ago?'' Jane settled in to her side of the bed, Maura tucked-in beside her as well.

''I haven't seen Joyleen yet, neither have I seen Margo since the day I left her in the hospital''

''Why Maur?''

''I don't know. I just told myself I'd see them when they got here. When I went to New York my mother had some photograph's of them but I refused to see them'', Maura said sadly.

''How could you not even want to see what they look like….what _Joyleen _looks like?''

''My mother sent an email with the photo's. Many a time I've just stared at those unopened images, but I could never bring myself to open them''

''Can I see them?''

* * *

**AN: Is Maura going to agree to this? One more chapter and then we finally meet Margo and Joyleen. Do you guys have any preconceived ideas about them? I Love talking to y'll...**


	12. The anxiety

**AN: I hate it when you hate me….coz I love you guys. And I hate it more when you hate Jane and Maura. So….WE MEET JOYLEEN AND MARGO HERE. I'm not too pleased with this chapter, but I will do my best to make the next ones interesting.**

* * *

''Can we just leave it until they come Jane. It's silly but somehow I would feel better that way'',

''Okay'', the subject was dropped as they fell asleep. Maura moved and was the one that spooned Jane's long form. She knew she would have a hard time falling asleep if she didn't have Jane close to her.

Tuesday was uneventful and eventful in a way. The murdered Doctor was still lying in the morgue. Maura was doing all she could do, but finding nothing on the body that could lead them to the killer. Jane's gumshoe thing wasn't helpful either. They were all stressed from not having any leads, and it was driving them all kinds of crazy.

At the end of the day, Maura and Jane went home and just relaxed in the tub for a good hour before retiring for the night.

On Wednesday, Angela was ready to move out. It was her day off and all she needed to take with her to Jane's was just her clothes really. That didn't warrant the aid of either of her sons, so she set about on her own. She knew she was going to miss the luxurious guesthouse, but also knew it was for the better that she steered clear.

Murder still unsolved, Jane and Maura made it home after 8pm – exhausted as ever.

''Part of me fears this is just going to become a cold case. It's been two days and we still haven't gotten a single thing'', Jane complained.

''You may be right. The murderer really knew what they were doing, and had planned it for a very long time''

''Do'you want me to make you anything?'', Jane asked Maura before she headed upstairs.

''A sandwich should be just fine. I'm really tired and just want to have a shower and relax''

''Cool, I'm make us those then''

Maura headed upstairs for a quick shower while Jane fixed some sandwiches for them. The blonde wasn't back after a while so she decided to make a quick call to her mother to find out how the moving had gone. Angela informed her that all was well, and that she needn't worry about a thing. When Maura got back down, clad in clean sleep-wear, they sat down to have their supper.

''Ma said she moved alright''

''Oh dear, I meant to give her a call earlier on, I can't understand how I forgot'', Maura said.

''It's okay. She said she's fine anyway''

They finished their meal, chatting briefly about the case and just life in general. They were both skirting over the fact that _those _guy would arrive in a day and a half. It was a sore subject, and neither had the strength for it as it was.

On Thursday, Maura was the one to start. ''Do you want to go to the mall with me during lunch?''

''Sure. What do you wanna get?'', Jane asked absent mindedly. They were driving to work and dreading the rising difficulty of the case they had since Monday.

''I thought I'd get Joyleen a gift''. Jane looked at her confused. She'd had a whole room done for her, what other 'gift' did she need? ''I mean like, a proper gift. The room and everything kind of goes without saying. I wanted something to actually _give _her''

''I see. Well we can go then. Did you have anything in mind?'', Jane asked as she pulled into the parking lot.

''I've been looking online and I thought I could get her a lovely guinea pig cage that we could keep in the living room. They have this lovely pet shop at the outdoor mall that has some wood cages and play centers that can blend in well with the living room décor'', Maura said in one rush.

''That's sweet Maur, I'm sure she'd love it''

''So meet you at one?''

''Yeah, I'll come get you then''. They shared a parting kiss before the elevator doors opened and they went their separate ways.

Work was unproductive once again. All they got were dead ends, and failed attempts at figured out who in fact killed the doctor. He had so many patients, many of whom weren't too fond of him. His family seemed decent enough, and he didn't have many friends. It was all difficult to discern, regardless of their great efforts.

''I'm out for lunch'', Jane announced at 1pm on the dot.

''See you in a bit'', Korsak replied.

''I won't be back till 2 though''

Frost and Korsak threw each other a meaningful look that Jane didn't notice as she rushed out.

Maura was ready by the time Jane got to the morgue, so they were quickly on their way. Jane learned that day that the pet shop was the best place to go when at the outside mall. There were very few people and no bumping into chatty girls with a shit load of shopping bags. The shopping assistant greeted them cheerfully and showed them to the guinea pig sector. The doctors eyes immediately landed on the wood-cage piece she had seen online. The young man explained how it possessed everything a guinea pig owner would ever want for their pet. Even Jane was sold, it was quite lovely – despite being very pricey.

Once that was done, they headed back to work.

''Do you think I should maybe do some food shopping?'', Maura asked during their drive back.

''I would say no. You won't know what she likes to eat so its better if you leave it until she gets here. That way you can go together and she'll tell you what she likes, and you'll tell her how it's slowly killing her by clogging her arteries and what not''

''Oh God I hope she doesn't eat like you do''. Maura briefly chastised herself for not at least looking at ONE of Joyleen's pictures so she could have a better understanding of her eating habits.

''Heeeey, that's so rude. What's wrong with how I eat?'', Jane complained.

''It's unhealthy''

''Well I _hope _she eats like me. That way we can gang up against you. I might just have an ally soon''

Maura laughed. She loved how Jane could so easy incorporate Joyleen into their lives, _before _she was even there. Something within her just knew the two would get along. She knew close to nothing about the young girl, but she knew everything about Jane. Jane was the type of person who you could get along with if she really wanted you to, regardless of how you are. She had seen Jane do it with her, and she knew Jane could do it with Joyleen too.

...

Rizzoli guts were underperforming. This case was most likely going to fall into the very small percent of unsolved cases she had. Nothing was looking up at all, and they didn't even have much place to start. The guys had spent the day at the golf club the victim frequented, met with fellow golfers and talked to the staff. Still there was not a clue. All they learned was that he was disliked because he was rich and bragged about it. Was it reason to kill, no. But they still had a dead body in their morgue.

At the end of the day, Jane was a nervous wreck. Tomorrow was a day that would change her life forever, and she wasn't looking forward to it one bit.

''You look very tense honey'', Maura observed the brunette.

''I guess its cause I am''

''Anything I can do?''. Jane felt like it was a trick question. Saying yes was admitting to fear and vulnerability, and saying no was making Maura feel useless. Not wanting to be an ass again, she decided on the truth.

''Whatever you know to be able to release tension would be great''

Maura smiled slyly. Sex was the only thing she thought would benefit Jane at the moment.

''Come with me'', She took Jane's hand and led her to the bedroom.

…

''I guess I did need that'', Jane panted against Maura's sweaty body after a mind numbing orgasm. Maura certainly knew her way around the lanky body.

They shared a shower before getting ready for bed.

''I love _you._ And there is no need to stress about tomorrow. I'm really glad you're going to be here with me Jane. I love you more for that''. Maura tried to reassure Jane before falling asleep.

''I love you too. And I wouldn't be anywhere else other than here with you''

* * *

Again Friday came by fast. _What the fuck, was Jane's waking thought. _

''Are some hours being removed from the day?'', Jane said groggily.

''That would be impossible Jane. And good morning to you too''

''Morning baby'', she said through her scratchy morning voice. Maura felt those butterflies she always got when Jane said something sweet.

''How do I look?'', Maura turned around nervously in Jane's line of view.

''You look lovely Maur''

''Jane! You didn't even _look _at me''

Jane finally sat up, knowing she wasn't getting the last ten minutes of sleep. ''Maur, you're dressed already? Its like 7am''

''I know Jane. I was just a little….jittery. I couldn't continue sleeping, and I wanted to look my best so I ha-''

''Okay Maur, I get it. Calm down. You look beautiful, you always do''

Maura sighed heavily. Clearly that's not what she wanted to hear.

''You look amazing. And your attire is perfect'', Jane tried again.

That must have been better, because Maura smiled widely at her.

''Just so you know, it's not always _what _you say, but rather _how _you say it'', the blonde said smugly.

''Okay smart ass, what should _I _wear''

''Ohh'', Maura squealed. How she loved to dress Jane. She went into her closet and pulled out Jane's black trousers – the ones that actually fit her, not the loose ones. She then matched them to a blue button down – she swooned over a Jane in a blue buttoned down shirt. And it matched well with her outfit. Maura had a blue dress and a black blazer to go over it.

''This'', Maura presented the ensemble.

''I hope I don't mess it up before lunch'', she joked.

''I better make toast for breakfast then'', Maura took it seriously. Jane just laughed at the flustered woman before going in for a shower.

...

Cavanaugh gave them the weekend off, starting Friday at 1pm. Margo and Joyleen were scheduled to arrive at 2:30pm. Knowing Joyleen had a sizable load of luggage, Maura arranged for a small van to transport their luggage while she and Jane took the two in her Prius.

It was no surprise they made it to the airport early, Jane was a bundle of nerves – just as Maura was.

''I can't remember the last time my hands were this sweaty'', Maura said.

Jane took said hands and wiped them with her own slightly less sweatier ones. ''It's gonna be okay''

''I hope she likes it here and doesn't decide she'd much rather return. I can see the appeal of France so maybe-''

''If you faint, she might just change her mind'', Jane tried to joke. She could see her friend was nearing a vasovagal episode, and she needed to help calm her down. According to the information they were just given, the plane had landed five minutes ago so they were stationed by the waiting area looking out for the two. Jane was strangely calm, while Maura's insides were almost spilling out.

The blonde was going over her breathing techniques when Jane spotted who she was sure was Margo and Joyleen. The younger girl had dark 'above the shoulders' blonde hair, just like the elder woman next to her. She was about 4 foot 8inches – short in general, with potential of not getting any taller than maybe 5 foot 5 in her entire life. Joyleen looked bubbly and wore a wide smile on her face. The bag in her hand must definitely have been housing her pet.

Margo was a presence. From where Jane stood, she could feel the confidence the woman exuded. She looked so….sure of herself. She was a VERY beautiful woman who was no doubt comfortable in her own body. Margo rocked a very short hair-do. She looked rather wealthy – expensive jewellery, and all. The woman walked with swagger, looking uninterested in her surroundings, a bit like she would rather have been elsewhere.

''Maur'', Jane tugged on the blonde who had her face mostly buried in her hands and had not noticed the people they were waiting for.

She then followed Jane's line of vision and spotted the two coming from a distance. Margo, to her, had changed vastly since university – in terms of appearance. She looked _much _hotter, and had certainly aged well (if you could even call it aging). And Joyleen, with her beautiful blue eyes took Maura's breath away.

''Maura'', the girl surprised them all by falling into Maura's arms. But the blonde embraced her equally as hard, tears spilling out of her eyes already.

''Oh honey, you are such a pretty girl'', Maura whispered into her hair.

Meanwhile, Jane was studying her competition. And she already knew the type of woman Margo was, before she'd even said a word.

''Hello Margo'', Maura greeted as she pulled away from Joyleen.

''Vous regardez belle Maura'', Margo said shamelessly, pulling her ex-lover into a hug.

''Thank you, so do you''. Maura let go and turned to take Jane's hand in hers. ''This is Jane….'', she swallowed hard – clearly wanting to say more but unsure how to proceed. Margo was watching their entwined hands curiously. She hadn't even cared to look at Jane properly, as if the brunette was of no concern to her.

''Jane Rizzoli, her girlfriend'', she tilted her head in Maura's direction and offered her hand to Margo for a hand-shack. ''Welcome to Boston''

Maura felt everything inside her turn to liquid. Jane had just called her her girlfriend. She wasn't sure if it was possible to feel any happier.

* * *

**AN: I love Revenge - don't know if any of you watch it. Margo in my mind here, looks like Margo from Revenge. I think she's hot, there's just something so sexy about her.**


	13. Meeting

**AN: I feel much better now, we don't completely hate Jane and Maura anymore. Next chapter will most likely come on Wednesday night. Thanks again you guys. **

**PeaceOfPi – the guest who reviewed, she said and I quote ''…thanks for the quick updates btw. You rock for that…''. I just wanted to say thank you, it really means a lot that you appreciate that – not only (her, I guess), but all of you too.**

* * *

_Well fuck it. Fuck it fuck it fuck it, Jane told herself. _She'd done it. She'd put a name to everything between her and Maura, because she'd be damned if she lost her to Margo. And it _was _very possible. Margo was a catch, and Jane didn't want Maura entertaining the thought of a rekindle between them. Maybe it was selfish, but Jane knew Maura deserved her. Margo was not the type of woman who would put Maura before anything else. She wasn't the type of woman who would happily give her life for Maura. Jane was convinced there wasn't anyone who could love Maura Isles more than she did.

Maura turned to Jane in surprise, and offered a sweet smile – one that answered the question Jane asked by squeezing her hand. _Yes, I will be your girlfriend. _

''Interesting'', was all Margo said.

''Joyleen. This is Jane'', Maura introduced the two. Clearly Margo didn't have the manners to.

''Hallo Jane'', she said in her French accent, offering her small hand to the brunette.

''It's lovely to meet you sweetie'', Jane took her hand for the greeting. ''What do we have in her?'', Jane pointed to the bag in Joyleen's hand.

The child's face was alight with Joy. ''This is Sky, my guinea pig'', Joyleen set her bag on the nearby chair and began taking her companion out to introduce it.

''I need to take this'', Margo announced, pointing to the chiming device in her hand. Clearly she had no interest in the happenings of their first encounter. She _did _have an interest in Maura though, because her eyes lingered a little too long before walking away to take her call in private. Joyleen looked sadly at the retreating form of her mother. Her face told Jane and Maura that the woman took no interest in the child's pet – or life for that matter.

''Sky, say hi to Maura and Jane'', Joyleen held the fluffy animal in her hands. Sky was a chubby light brown and white pet, very cute by anyone's standards.

''Oh my, he's a big fellow'', Maura said.

''She , Maura'', Joyleen laughed. ''The…what is the English name for an animal doctor?''

''Veterinarian'', Maura answered.

''We just say the Vet'', Jane helped. She saw how Joyleen was struggling to even begin to say the word.

''Yes, that is easier. The Vet said she is overweight, I have just started her on a diet''

''Well, you won't have any problems here with that. Maura here, is all about eating healthy'', Jane joked.

Joyleen seemed to find this amusing and just laughed out loud. ''You can hold him'', she handed the pet over to Maura. The blonde took it wearily, never having have handled such a pet before. Sky might have sensed this and began to squirm in the doctors grip. ''Just don't keep him too close right now, he may pee on you. At home its okay because you can always change'', at that mention Maura quickly pushed the pet as further away from herself as she could. Joyleen broke off in laughter upon seeing Maura's horrified face.

''Give him to Jane so she can say hallo too'', Joyleen jumped up and down in delight. The little girl was such a pleasure, Maura and Jane couldn't help but like her in the mere fifteen minutes they'd just met. It wasn't possible to not be drawn to her, she had such positive energy, Maura actually feared she might not be able to keep up. Jane on the other hand, seemed to be faring just fine. The brunette took the guinea pig and began acting out scene's from the movie **G-Unit. **Joyleen broke off into yet another fit of laughter.

''Have you seen that movie Jane? Maura, have you?'', she asked enthusiastically.

''I have, but Miss thing over here probably hasn't'', Jane pointed at Maura.

''Jane'', Maura playfully shoved her.

''Okay okay…sorry'', She offered. Joyleen watched them with great delight. She had a feeling she was going to love it in Boston.

''So you guys are a couple'', the young girl stated. Jane nervously rubbed the back of her neck, unsure what and what not to say. What she _did _know was that she had to say something. ''It's okay….the whole gay thing. Mother already explained that to me, because she is gay too. And because you and her used to be a couple'', she looked to Maura.

''Yes, Maura and I are a together. But we have only just started dating….but we were best friend's for years'', she added.

''Is that okay honey?'', Maura asked quietly.

''Yes it is. I'm just a little bit confused though. Because if you are my other mother, I should call you mom, correct'', she looked at the doctor expectantly.

''If you'd like too, Joyleen. Maura would be equally fine''

''Isn't it disrespectful to call your mother by their first name?'', Joyleen reasoned.

''Yes it is. Its just that our circumstances aren't the norm. But calling me mom is still okay sweetie, don't think that I am objecting''

''Right. So if you and Jane are together, does that make her mom too?'', the girl asked for clarification.

''Woooooah, honey. Maura, mom'', Jane pointed at Maura. ''Me, Jane'', she pointed to herself. ''There is no need to get confused about it. Just call me Jane please. If there are any changes, we'll figure it out in the future alright''. _Boy did she get straight to things. Kinda just like Maura, Jane thought. _

''Okay, but I will start calling you mom after Mother goes so that it doesn't get confusing'', Joyleen said happily. ''I just wanted to be sure. Meme, my grandmother, always said I should ask all the time so I am sure about everything''

''Well that's good Joyleen'', Maura seconded. ''If there is anything you want to know, or are not sure of do not hesitate to ask me, or Jane. All the time okay''

''Sure, and-''

''Yolanda'', the little girl was cut off by her mother. ''Your Pepe wants to say hi'', the phone was handed over to the little girl who was all too happy to speak to her grandfather.

''Has the driver taken our luggage over to your place Maura?'', Margo queried.

''Yes. We were just waiting for you so we could head home''. Yes, the tension was thick. But that was mostly between Jane and Maura, Margo didn't seem to have a care in the world. In fact, she acted as if Jane wasn't even there – barely looking at her, or directing conversation towards her.

''Yolanda bebe allons-y'', she beckoned for her daughter to make a move on her conversation and then addressed Maura, ''We have so much to catch up on, ma cherie. You still look as stunning as you did twelve years ago, what is your secret?'', she threw Maura a seductive glare.

''We should probably get going, the van should be waiting for us'', Maura completely ignored Margo's comments and questions.

Joyleen joined then as they began to walk outside to their car, the little girl diffusing the tension with her happy talk. Margo has busy typing away on her phone once again. The woman was seriously in her own little world. She watched with a blank expression as Jane opened the passenger side door for Maura, while her and Joyleen jumped in the back.

''I can't believe you wound up in _this _place'', Margo scrunched her face up uncomfortably as they drove through the streets of Boston heading to Beacon Hill.

''It's a very lovely place, I wouldn't want to anywhere else in the world. You'll see Joyleen'', Maura quickly answered. There were four easy ways to piss of Jane Rizzoli. Negative mention of her family, her job, her hometown and her Maura. Maura didn't want an argument before they even got home.

''I can't wait'', Joyleen squealed. ''My friends were so jealous I was moving to America''

''Well that because they thought you were going somewhere fancy like California'', Margo snorted. Jane gave the woman one thing though, at least she had the decency to speak in English. Because she could easily have chosen French and left her out completely.

No one responded to her rude remark anyway. Joyleen began chattering away about her farewell part at school, and how she'd gotten goodbye presents from her friends. Margo was back on her device again, and Jane just couldn't wait to get out of the car.

When they got home, the van with their luggage was parked in the drive way. ''Cool place Maura'', Joyleen scanned the house with excitement. Margo just rolled her eyes, it was too modest for her liking. She was the flashy kind of person. Because she travelled a lot, she didn't buy a house for herself. But she often rented mansions in whatever country she was situated in at a given time. She had inherited a lot from her late grandparents, and now more from her mother's passing.

Joyleen bounced up the front porch as if she had lived there her whole life. Jane opened the door up for her and the two entered. The detective didn't want, but knew she had to give Maura and Margo sometime to speak on their own. She also needed sometime alone with Maura to talk. There was going to be a lot of talking going on, and Jane wasn't excited in the least. She spared one glace outside and saw Margo jumping into the drivers side she had just vacated so her and Maura could talk.

''You wanna see your room?'', Jane channelled her energy to the sweet girl in her company. Before they could make it upstairs, Jo came barking happily.

''Is that your dog? Maura said in her email that you had a dog''

''That would be her. Her name is Jo Friday''

The terrier jumped into Joyleen's small arms. ''You have a funny name'', she stroked Jo. ''She's sweet Jane. I couldn't have a dog because my Pepe is allergic. Does he live here? You stay with Maura right? So now I finally get to have a dog''

_Great, Jane thought. What do I say now? _She decided not to answer at all. ''And Maura has a turtle''

''I thought she said she had a tortoise''

''Or right, a tortoise. I always call it a turtle just to annoy her''

Joyleen laughed out loud, ''you are naughty Jane''. The detectives heart melted a little. She was already falling in love with the little girl. ''So…my room''

''Follow me'', Jane lead the way.

...

Meanwhile in the car…

''Why do you call her Yolanda?'', Maura began the second Margo sat down.

''Because that's the name you always wanted for her. _That _is her name''

''So why did you name her Joyleen then?''

''I was very angry when you left, so I picked another name. But when I was done being upset, I began to call her the name that was supposed to be hers''

Maura wasn't sure why she asked that question, and now that she had the answer she wasn't sure what to do with it. ''I'm sorry for what I did Margo'', Maura said sincerely. She really did mean it, and hoped Margo would accept the apology.

''It's okay. I was very mad at the time, but I moved on from it'', she said simply. Appearing to genuinely not be affected anymore.

''Why don't you want such a wonderful girl Margo? She's so beautiful and smart and cheerful. How could you not want her?''

''I told you this _twelve years ago _Maura. I did not want to have a child. This was all your doing, and that is the reason why she is here today''

''I understand that you may not have wanted her then, but watching her grow, don't those feeling change?''

''You don't get to say that to me. _You _walked out on us'', Margo stated firmly.

''I did, and there is nothing I can say that will make things any better or different. What I did was wrong. I was young and naïve and I made some very bad decisions''

''So don't question or judge mine''

''What did you tell her about me?''

''Everything'', Margo shrugged.

''Everything?''

''Yes Maura, everything. That I got pregnant, don't know who her father is. That I was dating you and you wanted to keep her. Then you abandoned us. Everything''

Maura rubbed her face, unsure why Joyleen would even like her after hearing all this.

''I told her good things too Maura. I told her about our time together, how much we loved each other. I told her about all the times you sang and read to her when I was pregnant, and how you took care of me. And if you must know, that's the only thing me and her have in common – you. I told her about you when she was 6years old. Every time we spent together, she asked me all sorts of questions, and I told her everything I knew about you''

Maura wiped the stray tear. She was deeply touched.

''That's why she chose to come here Maura. Because she loved everything she heard about you. And you know what she said about you? She said, 'if she wanted me when I was just a bean in your stomach, she'll definitely want me now when I'm a big girl'. So I told her I could bring her here if you agreed''

It was a new revelation for Maura, having someone who wanted her, before they even met her. She didn't know what she would do for Joyleen. Her own mother had to go through stages of wanting her – both biological and adoptive. But here was this little girl, who just simply wanted her. She felt overwhelmed and fell completely in love with the child that instant.

''She wants to call me mom'', Maura said through the tears.

''You _are _her mother. That's how it's always been. She's grown up knowing she had two mothers, despite that both of them weren't in her life''

''I will never leave her again'', Maura promised herself out loud.

''So…you and Jane huh'', Margo got to what she deemed a more interesting topic.

''Yes'', Maura answered.

''I didn't think you were still dating women''

''I wasn't, Jane was the first….after you''. Maura immediately wished she hadn't admitted that.

''Is she any good? In bed''

''Margo! That isn't any of your business''

''Oh please Maura. You can't tell me that I'm going to be here for two weeks and we aren't going to make some new memories'', she winked at her.

Maura exited the car that moment. She in no way wanted that with Margo, no less the mere conversation. When she got into the house, she heard loud laughter from upstairs. Following the noise, she could hear Joyleen's amused voice throwing endless questions at Jane, and the brunette trying to answer as many as she could. When she peeked through the door, she found Jane sitting on the bed with Joyleen kneeling behind her, small hands in unruly curls.

''Oh Maura'', the girl called out when she spotted the blonde. ''Isn't Jane's hair cool'', she gushed.

''It is indeed. Maybe you could get her to comb it once in a while''

''I do comb it. Don't listen to her Joyleen, she just wishes she was a dark haired raven beauty'', Jane said the last part theatrically.

''Gotta go to the toilet'', Joyleen jumped off the bed headed to the bathroom.

Before Jane could get a word out, Margo appeared. ''Maura, all you had to do was just answer me you know'', she started.

''Is everything okay Maur?'', Jane asked, seeing the blondes face contour unpleasantly as soon as Margo arrived.

''Yes, everything is fine'', Margo answered. ''I don't know why she's upset, I was just talking about me and her having sex for old times sake'', she said smugly, knowing she had hit a nerve and daring Jane to say anything back.

* * *

**AN: Woops...**


	14. Mine

**Especially for Lou18**

**AN: To MM-UP from Deutschland, there is no PM link on your profile! And I put in a vote on your poll, you might not like my answer though….lol. **

**All you guys taking the time to read this, thanks. Your reviews and PM's are very interesting and encouraging. You're all really awesome. **

**This chapter has a bit of everything - anger, tears, smiley moments, sex, shouting. Be warned. I feel a little schizophrenic today. **

* * *

**Disclaimer: I don't own Rizzoli and** **Isles.**

* * *

''_Yes, everything is fine'', Margo answered. ''I don't know why she's upset, I was just talking about me and her having sex for old times sake'', she said smugly, daring Jane to say anything back._

Detective Jane Rizzoli owned a gun, and she was never hesitant to use it if need be. When they had gone to the airport to pick Joyleen and Margo up, she had kept her badge and gun in the dash board so as not to scare the child off quickly. That may have been the _only _reason Margo was still expelling carbon dioxide into the bedroom the three adults were still standing in.

Maura had never known Jane to have excessive self-control. She lashed out over an inanimate object like a red traffic light if she was running low on caffeine. The fact that three whole seconds had passed and Jane hadn't said anything was a testament to how truly pissed off she was. Jane was boiling underneath, and Maura knew it. Outside she looked like a normal angry person would look, but inside Maura knew that one wrong move, and Jane would be unstoppable. She could start a fire that could burn the whole of Beacon Hill if you tested her. Margo didn't know that, and so she was having a go at Jane.

Jane let the silence go on for up to six seconds for ONE reason only, her and Maura hadn't gotten to talking about their suddenly changed status - everything had happened so fast. Jane didn't want trouble just yet, but if it came to it, they were surely all going to bathe in it. She knew that her actions, or whatever came out of her mouth, was something she would regret for the rest of her life.

For Margo's sake, Maura thought it best to intervene quickly. ''This is highly inappropriate conversation Margo, and I would advise that you refrain from speaking of that again – it is NEVER going to happen'', Maura spoke icily.

''No need to get –''

''I will say this only ONCE'', Maura stepped into Margo's personal space. ''I am with Jane now, and she is the only one I am interested in sleeping with. What we had is in the past, don't get mislead by my kindness. And next time I won't be speaking so nicely about this'', she took a step away and stretched her hand out to Jane. ''You and Joyleen can make yourself comfortable. Your bedroom is the next door from this one. Excuse us''

They bumped into Joyleen by the door as the girl was on her way back from the loo having missed all the drama, luckily. ''Oh Jane, you're tall enough. Can you please stick something for me on my bedroom door?''. How could Jane say no to those puppy dog eyes.

''Sure sweetie''. Her seething anger dissipated considerable at the trusting eyes the child showed. She turned to Maura, ''I'm coming in a minute'', it came out as more of a question. Maura nodded and Joyleen ran to pull a combination of letters from her back-pack that spelled out **Yolanda. **

''I haven't said anything to you only out of respect for Maura, don't push me'', Jane spoke to Margo through clenched teeth. The words might as well have been lava, because they burnt like hell. The dark blonde was still looking shell-shocked from Maura's words. It was evident she had never heard Maura speak like that, let alone to her. And she definitely wasn't expecting it. Her intention was to pick a fight with Jane, not Maura.

Obliviously happy, Joyleen came up to Jane giving the brunette instructions on how she wanted the letters stuck onto the door.

''How come you use Yolanda?'', Jane wondered.

''Well, Joyleen is my first name and I mostly use it at school. Most of my friends call me JY. But at home its always been Yolanda. So my door will say Yolanda, but my school books will say Joyleen. Get it?''

''Gotcha'', Jane smiled as she finished sticking the letters. ''I'm gonna have a word with Maura for a little bit okay. Get comfortable''

''Thanks Jane. You're pretty awesome''

''You're pretty awesome too honey'', and Jane swaggered off to the master bedroom.

...

''I'm in here'', Maura called from the en-suite when she heard Jane enter.

As soon as the brunette walked it, she was pushed against the closed door by a very predatory looking Maura. The blonde suddenly had an uncontrollable desire to consume Jane.

''Mau-'', the name never made it past the first three letter, as Maura's lips melted like better against Jane's. The brunette felt like she'd been hit by a giant wave, all thought process gone.

They began the kiss slowly, but very powerfully. ''So I'm your girlfriend now'',she said as more of an exhale.

''It wasn't the most perfect way to ask you Maur, but yes. I want you….desperately''. Jane's strong arms held on to Maura's hips firmly, pulling the petite woman as close to her as possible. Maura began slowly grinding into Jane, making the detective bang loudly against the en-suite door.

''We..'', Jane tried to get out through the kiss. ''We need to be careful…Jo…Joyleen or Margo are going to…he-hear us'', Jane finished.

Maura pulled away slightly and looked into Jane's chocolate eyes seriously. ''I saw how you held yourself back in Joyleen's room'', she spoke like someone who'd just finished running a marathon. ''And its because we hadn't got the chance to talk…about this'', Maura kneaded a firm breast – as if she was referring specifically to the boob. ''I'm all yours Jane Rizzoli. And next time'', she started her kisses along the detective's neck, ''don't hesitate to stand up for your lover''. Jane moaned at the word. Maura was her lover now. She now had the right to speak up for her. Winning the lottery would never feel that good. ''I think you need a little reminder Detective'', Maura's hand left the breast and began unbuttoning Jane's trousers.

''What if they hear us Maura?'', Jane worried.

''I want to fuck you Jane….nothing is going to stop me'', spoke with such conviction. Jane would have sworn those words hadn't just come out of the mouth of Maura Isles. For the doctor, there was something strangely exhilarating about the prospect of may be being heard. She wanted to do this, and it was going to take a natural disaster to halt her progress.

Pants unfastened, Maura's lips latched to the tanned long neck once again – sucking rigorously. Her teeth dragged against the surface of Jane's now sweaty skin, and latched onto another spot that was then sucked on once again. She was definitely going to leave marks, but Jane was hers and not a single soul had the right to question her. The dancing around had gone on for too long.

''Maura'', Jane panted. ''Kiss me''. She didn't need to be asked twice. The normally refined doctor planted a kiss of violent passion to wet waiting ones. When Jane's parted lips asked for more, she got a tonsillectomy from the blonde, who was again relentlessly seeking more contact with her girlfriend.

''Did I tell you how incredibly gorgeous you look in this blue button up'', Maura asked as she opened up said garment.

''I just remember you picking it out for me'', Jane smirked.

''It took all the self-constraint I had since morning not to rip it off you'', as the words came out, the shirt was being thrown across the room.

''I can understand why you don't have any now''

''I used up all I had Jane. Step out of these''. The brunette was shocked to find her pants around her ankles that fast. Maura was a woman on a mission, and Jane wasn't complaining.

With Jane now in only her bra, underwear and shoes, Maura pushed her back against the door. She decided on a final assault of Jane's neck – there was something incredible sexy about it for Maura. Not to forget the sensation of feeling Jane's moans as vibrations that go directly into her mouth when she's kissing that neck. A warm tongue left a moist trail as it voyaged to Jane's ear. The fleshy organ then carefully entered Jane's ear. The penetration released a gush of fluid from Jane's core and Maura thrust it in and out intentionally sluggish.

''Awwww baby'', Jane moaned loudly.

Maura felt empowered.

Slowly she went down on her knees – still clothed. It was the first time she was going down on the detective. Their previous sexcapades had been less…varied, you could say. It had been love-making. Worshipping the others body. And had evolved around the tradition fingering. It had been centered on emotional feelings. Now it was primal. Now it was _fucking. _Something had happen within Maura from the second Jane had called her her girlfriend that she couldn't quite pin point. That would be dealt with later though, she had a visibly throbbing and drenched delicious pussy before her eyes.

''You smell like…'', Maura inhaled Jane's scent deeply, ''Like heaven'', she laughed at herself. It was the only word she could possibly use as a description. And her hungry tongue immediately met with pink slick folds. _Yes, just like heaven. _

''Oh fuck'', Jane's head met with the wooden bathroom door as she was now unable to hold it up.

Maura never slackened in her assignment. She licked Jane's entire core, not wanting to waste a single drop of Jane's sweet juices. Her tongue it turned out, was just as meticulous as her fingers, if not more. It swirled around a swollen nub, making lazy potent swirls.

Jane held firmly to the door's wooden railing for what little support she could get. Her one leg was perched onto the bathroom stool close by, giving Maura full access to all that was Jane. The doctor held onto Jane's legs as she continued offering her lover as much pleasure as she could.

Jane could feel her heart beat racing fast. Maura had landed on the spot to the left of her clit, the spot that made her almost blind with arousal. ''Maura…don't stop. Ri-right there'', she begged, afraid the blonde would relocated. She needed her just where she was. And when Maura began to flick her tongue, Jane thought her legs wouldn't hold her up. ''Oh Maur…Maura….I'm….'' the sentence – if you could call it that - was never completed. Jane screamed as her orgasm hit her like a head-on collision with a speeding truck. Maura hadn't even gotten to penetrating Jane with her tongue. Long forgetten where the other two people in the house. It was all about her and Maura in that moment.

''Wow'', Jane exhaled as she sank to the floor. Her limbs were vibrating from the after-shocks.

''We'll talk properly later okay'', Maura offered from her position next to Jane.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later Jane was freshened up and in search of Joyleen.

She floated downstairs feeling like she ruled the world. Yes, she was floating – in her mind at least. She felt invincible, and ready to conquer anything.

''Hey Jane. Were you and Maura still talking?'', the girl asked innocently.

''Yes'', Jane said thickly. They had talked right? Or not….whatever. Leaving out details wasn't so bad, even Maura did it. ''I see Sky is settling in well'', the detective quickly averted the conversation.

''Wonderfully. I hope you don't mind'', she said shyly. ''I figured since you had a dog and Maura has a tortoise, the cage was for Sky''.

''You figured right''. Joyleen had spotted the beautiful cage and had no doubt it was for her pig. She had been too excited and anxious to wait for permission, so she had gone ahead and started making it comfortable for her pet. In all honesty, she _had _waited, but no adult had presented themself. Margo had already began working and was locked off in her room. Jane and Maura were, according to her, _talking. _So the poor girl did what she had no problems doing, entertained herself.

''So….are you hungry sweetie?'', Jane asked while she peeped at Sky running around in her new territory.

''Sort of'', Joyleen shrugged.

''What about I introduce you to some good old fashioned American food''

''Really'', the girl jumped in delight.

''We have a problem though'', Jane said conspiratorially. Bright blue eyes were looking at her intently – waiting. ''Maura isn't going to be too happy about it'', Joyleen chuckled, having an idea where the conversation was going. ''So if you end up in a French restaurant, I want to make it clear now that it is not my doing''. Now the little girl simply laughed out loud.

''I don't want to go to a French restaurant. It would be odd, coming from France and going to eat French food again''

''Tell that to your mom Maura'', Jane snorted good naturedly. She knew her girlfriend was going to be thinking of all sorts of fancy places to go.

''I will''. Jane's eyes immediately grew wide. _Please tell me she understands sarcasm….oh my God, Jane cried internally. _

''I didn't mean to say you need to _tell _her that'', Jane clarified.

''So you were joking, or using….'', she searched for the word.

''Sarcasm'', the brunette helped.

''My Meme used to say its rude, and that I shouldn't use it'', she said a bit sadly.

''That's true''. Before Jane went on, it dawned on her that no one had even mentioned the passing of the girl's grandmother, the woman who had parented her. Jane felt so bad for that, so so bad. ''Come here'', Jane took a smaller hand in hers, she had already seen the change in Joyleen's happy mood. Jane led them to the couch, where they sat down next to each other.

''I'm sorry about your grandmother honey'', Jane said painfully, as if the words themselves were hurting her.

''It's okay'', Joyleen said quietly. It was quite a contrast from the her prevailing demeanour since arrival.

''It is okay, but its also not okay''. Blue teary eyes found Jane's. It was Jane's intention anyway. She wanted the girl to look at her, but not knowing her very well, she didn't want to come off as demanding or uncompassionate. ''It's not okay that she died. It was a very terrible thing, for you especially. But its okay to talk about it. And its okay to be sad, or to cry'', the tears began to fall from the little girls wide eyes. Jane quickly gathered her into her arms, feeling her own tears threatening to fall. ''Me and Maura are here for you sweetie, always. Do you understand?''

She nodded.

''Good. And if you ever want to talk about it, we're here''

There was a bit of silence, save for the sound of Sky running rampant in her new cage. ''I miss her'', Joyleen finally said in a small voice. It was so small, and she sounded a little bit afraid Jane might have thought.

''It's okay to miss her. You loved her very much'', Jane soothed. Rubbing the girls arm that she still held in a side-ways hug.

''I did love her. And I'm sad because I will never see her again''

Jane had no idea how to follow up on that, so she just went with her instincts. ''My grandma died ten years ago'', she revealed.

Joyleen instantly lifted her head to detect how serious the brunette was. ''Really?''

''Yes. And I was really sad. I was actually _sick _for about a week. We were very close and I loved her so much. I was her favourite'', she let out a humourless chuckle.

''I was my grandmother's favourite too'', Joyleen said with a bit of delight in her voice, looking considerably perked up.

''Well….aren't we just awesome'', Jane tried her hand at a joke. It worked, because the young girl smiled at her widely.

''Yes we are'', and this time Joyleen was the one that fell into her arms, squeezing the brunette extra hard.

''Wanna get ready for dinner''

''I'm ready'', Joyleen looked down at her jeans and sweater combo.

''That's my girl'', they high-fived each other because the had matching attires. Jane then realized what she has said, but it was pointless taking it back because she meant it.

Maura was in a teary mess, standing by the hallway watching her 'new daughter' and 'new girlfriend' bond. It was the cutest thing she had ever seen. She couldn't even imagine that in the midst everything going on, she had forgotten to offer her condolences to Joyleen and Margo. That was so out of character for Maura – etiquette was the most natural thing to her.

The blonde walked back upstairs to Margo's room, thinking that having this talk with her ex-lover now was better than leaving it until _she _brought it up.

...

''Come in'', Margo answered after the first knock. ''Maura'', she said in surprise. The dark blonde was perched on the computer table with her laptop on, clearly doing whatever business it is she did.

''Sorry to disturb you'', Maura began politely. ''Can I come in?''

''Sure'', Margo said sceptically. It sounded like a trick question, after what had transpired. But she then remembered that Maura had always had a good heart.

Maura walked in and sat by the bed with her legs crossed at the knees, dressed to the nines as usual. ''I wanted to tell you how very sorry I am about your mothers passing'', she said sincerely.

''It's fine. Sad, but shit happens right''

''It does indeed'', Maura replied uncomfortably due to the use of profanity. ''How is Joyleen copying with the death?''

''Okay I suppose. She doesn't – _hasn't - , _talked about it. Father and I spoke to her briefly after the death, and during the funeral, but that was it. She didn't really say much about it. And like I told you before, me and her aren't really close. She usually just talked to Mother, and now she sort of has no one''. Margo's tone seemed a tad detached. As if she was just telling a story she'd heard.

''Did you really _try _to talk to her?'', Maura pressed, after having witnessed Jane's efforts.

''Don't give me that Maura. Where were YOU twelve years ago when she was waking up every two hours for a feed, or nappy change? Where were YOU when she fell all those times learning to walk, or off her bicycle? And you want to lecture me now about _not trying_'', Margo yelled.

Unbeknownst to her, Jane had heard her raised voice from the beginning of those sentences and was on her way upstairs.

* * *

**AN: Don't kill me. I swear this isn't on purpose. I need time to work out the coming dialogue/shit storm...maybe.**


	15. Cheeseburger

''**Sasha is looking old and worn out lately. She needs to fix herself. Botox or something''. An Anon posted this on tumblr. Can you just imagine THE NERVE this person had? Who the **_**fuck**_** says that? I am still pissed about this. There is NO amount of botox that can make Sasha Alexander look any more beautiful than she already is. Shame on that person.**

**Right….the story :**

* * *

_Unbeknownst to her, Jane had heard her raised voice from the beginning of those sentences and was on her way upstairs._

''Maura, Joyleen is asking for you'', Jane lied. She was pretty sure when Maura got downstairs the two would be distracted enough not to worry about Jane's lie. She had walked into the room looking as calm as a tranquilized addict. With one glance towards Margo, Maura walked out – Joyleen, to her, was more important than the argument bubbling up with Margo.

''I warned you before'', Jane said bitterly after shutting the door behind Maura. ''I'm a very busy person Margo, and I don't have the time or energy to play around with serious matters. You, and your life – past and present – have got nothing to do with me'', Jane inched closer to a slightly frightened Margo. ''If it wasn't for Joyleen, you'd have left this house _before _you got your foot past the threshold. When you _try _to insult me, like you did before – it's easy for me to let it slid. But not when it comes to Maura'', she enunciated every word clearly. Pointing a deadly finger to the woman in front of her she continued. ''When it comes to Maura I don't take things so lightly. I told you before not to test me, I'm not going to say it again''

''Well its really _her _fault that we are here'', Margo said trying to appear un-intimidated.

''Don't even go there'', Jane warned coldly.

''Oh I should'', Margo huffed, standing up from her sitting position in an attempt to have equal ground with Jane. ''She did an un-honourable thing by leaving. She doesn't get to just run away and go on with her life because everyone's scared to tell her what-''

''Shut the fuck up'', Jane pushed the woman towards the wall in one swift motion. Margo's eyes nearly fell out of their sockets when her back made contact with the wall. The blonde thought it might have been a regrettable move on Jane's part – something she may have done out of pure anger and hadn't meant it. Because of that she watched Jane get closer to her thinking an apology, filled with begging, was in order.

She was wrong. Jane had made no mistake.

The brunette stepped purposely into her personal space, exhaling directly onto her face, with a stern finger pointing to her. ''You fucking cheated on her. You went around doing God-knows-what then came back to her _pregnant'',_ she yelled, not caring now that Joyleen or Maura could possibly hear them. ''If you hadn't gotten pregnant where you going to tell her that you were sleeping around?''

''Get off me'', Margo tried to get past Jane. The brunette pushed her back to the wall forceful.

''I'm not done saying what I have to say_ woman,_ and you're going to damn well listen''. She saw the fear in the woman's eyes and had a little internal victory dance. ''You didn't even know who the father of that child was. That's how bad it was. And you want to come into Maura's house and insult her. And guilt trip into thinking she's the worst person in the world. Not on my watch'', Jane seethed. She was fuming and trying hard to keep a lid on her temper. God knows some of it had already gone flying out the window.

''That is _my _girlfriend. I don't know what kind of intentions you had coming here, but whatever it is isn't going to happen. Maura is a good woman, the best damn person I've ever met. She may try to tolerate your stupid behaviour because of that beautiful little girl, but don't be mistaken into thinking I will. I don't owe you _anything. _I don't owe Joyleen anything. So watch yourself. Watch yourself really closely, because you may leave Boston before your intended time – and be grateful if that will be in one piece. There isn't a single thing on earth I wouldn't do for the woman I love, don't forget that''.

With those words she moved away from Margo's stunned form and left the bedroom. She wasn't sure what Margo thought, or what she'd tell Maura but she didn't care. The woman had been poking at her since her arrival, and Jane had had just about enough.

* * *

''Are you okay?'', Maura jumped to ask Jane the moment the detective was in her view. She had heard the shouting, and had taken Joyleen out on the porch to have a look outside. She hadn't intervened, because she felt Jane deserved to have her say in everything that was going on. And Margo had hurt her feelings, so part of her felt she deserved Jane's wrath.

''Yeah. I'm gonna go for a run I think'', Jane mumbled avoiding Maura's gaze.

''But we're going out to dinner honey'', Maura said as she walked over to Jane with great concern marring her features.

''You can go without me. I haven't had a run in a while and I think the air would do me some good, you know….clear my head a little'', she shrugged. Joyleen was captivated by trying to keep up with Jo, so she wasn't listening to their conversation.

''Are we okay?'', Maura asked quietly.

''_We, _are okay…..'', Jane answered, leaving the rest to go unspoken. Her and Margo were _definitely _not okay. Neither was Maura and Margo. Or Joyleen and Margo for that matter. Yes, the woman was trouble. She was the root cause of all of this.

''There isn't a way I can persuade to come with us is there?'', Maura tried, batting her eyes a little for Jane.

''Nice try baby, but no. I'll make desert'', Maura tilted her head to the side placing her hands around Jane's neck instinctively. ''You guys can just have dinner, then when you get back we'll have desert''.

That seemed to appease Maura, who smiled widely and placed a soft kiss to her girlfriends lips. When it registered that Joyleen was in the vicinity, she pulled away shyly. ''It's okay Maura. I'm sure she has seen this before'', Jane assured her.

''I just don't want her to feel uncomfortable'', the blonde worried.

''I want to believe that if she is, she will tell us. Maybe we can talk to her about it later?''

''That would make me feel better, yes''

''Now go on. Poor girl must be starving by now'', Jane smacked Maura's ass playfully.

''Are you ready to go sweetie?'', Maura called out to Joyleen, throwing an amused glance to Jane.

''Me and Jane are ready'', she ran up to the two adults with Jo in her arms.

''I'm not coming with you hon, I'll just make desert for when you get back''

''Awww'', the girl sulked. ''But why? You said you'd introduce me to some nice American food''

Maura looked to Jane skeptically, having already had fears about the eating habits of the two girls in her life. ''And where exactly was Jane planning to take you?'', the blonde asked.

''We hadn't decided the exact place yet. Come on Jane'', she tugged her hand.

''Sorry Joyleen. I'll be here when you get back, don't worry''

''Okay'', she said grudgingly. Only happy over the prospect that she was at least going with Maura.

* * *

Luckily for Joyleen, Maura had the decency to take them to **Catalyst**, a bistro in Cambridge which was most suited for the occasion. It was an informal elegant sit-in, where they could order anything from seared scallops to cheeseburgers. She missed Jane the second she perused through the menu and spotted a picture of a delicious cheeseburger – Jane's favourite.

She was sitting next to Joyleen with a delighted Margo opposite them. The French woman was glad Jane had not joined them. After their earlier encounter, she would be happy to never lay eyes on her again. The twelve year old was excited as ever. She scanned her environment cheerfully and asked endless questions. She, according to Maura, was a hugger. She'd pulled the blonde into too many hugs to mention – it warmed Maura's heart each time. Because of her and Joyleen's growing affection for each other, she feared Margo would backtrack out of jealously and take the girl back with her. But upon studying the woman, she came to the realization that Margo didn't even care, possibly hadn't actually noticed their instant bond. She was so full of herself and the only person other than herself she took interest in was Maura – but that was in no way flattering to the good doctor.

''I am going to have a cheeseburger'', Joyleen announced after seeing the mouth-watering picture on the menu.

''Really?'', Maura smiled. ''That is Jane's favourite''

Joyleen felt as if she'd discovered the cure for cancer. The little girl's face broke into a wide smile that actually brought tears to Maura's eyes. ''Jane has awesome taste'', she said. ''What are you going to have?''

''I think I will try the burger too'', Maura indulged herself. If it was possible, Joyleen's smile got even bigger. ''Will you try one too Mommy''

''Oh no, definitely not'', Margo looked appalled. ''I will have the chicken oysters''

_Way to dampen the mood….Jane's voice rang in Maura's head. _

The kid just shrugged, happy that Maura was on board.

When the burgers came, Maura pulled out her mobile phone. ''Oh do take a picture of us Margo''. When they left the house, Margo had offered Maura a brief and insincere apology. Maura didn't much mind, all she was certain of was that Jane had definitely made an impact for an apology to come out willingly from the pompous woman – despite the insincerity of it. So they had left it at that and tried to get along for the child's sake. Maura hadn't even bothered to ask what the two spoke of, which kind of pissed Margo off. The dark blonde had thought she'd maybe take that opportunity to tell Maura that Jane had physically assaulted her.

''Sure''. Margo grabbed the mobile phone and took the pictures. She didn't even care to ask to join in, or even pretend to be interested. At least Maura and Joyleen were having enough fun between the two of them to care about her. Margo took several snaps of the two with huge cheeseburgers in front of them. Then another few of the both of them biting into the huge sandwich. If she had a decent sense of humor she may have found it laughable when Maura was trying to contain the contents of the burger between the bread ends. Or when sauce was dripping from the sides of Joyleen's small mouth. Maura briefly wondered what happened to the woman she had once fallen in love with. The woman who had been out-going and liberal and social. The woman who had loved her with all her awkwardness and social shortcomings. She had changed considerably, to the point of being hardly recognizable to Maura. The only trait still intact was her I-don't-care-attitude. Except now, it wasn't endearing anymore.

When Margo handed the phone over to Maura, the blonde had about a dozen pictures. She and Joyleen went through them, giggling at how silly they looked. She selected them all, and sent a message to Jane – sure her detective would find them thoroughly amusing, as opposed to the woman opposite her. After the pictures were sent, she typed out : **I miss you. My cheeseburger kept me going though, as ridiculous as it sounds. It made me feel like you were here, even though you weren't. It was Joyleen's choice – imagine how scared I am right now of the two of you under the same roof. **Then she remembered something else after pressing send : **we will most likely be done here in about half an hour. Expect us home by 8pm. Would you like me to order you a burger to go? **

A reply had come in from Jane already by the time she hit send to the last message: **omg Maura…those pics are so cool. You two look lovely. Now I wish I had come with you. And how could I say no to that burger? Bring me one, luckily I hadn't eaten much. I definitely have room for that. love you.**

Maura's heart beat a little faster. It was the first time she was getting a text from Jane with the words 'love you' at the end. She couldn't remember how many times she had been tempted to write those words at the end of a text in the past. It felt so great to not hold back anymore.

**I love you too Jane… **she typed out. Margo watched her swoon from across the table and felt a pang of jealously. She wanted Maura to swoon like that for _her. _''So…what does Jane do?'', she began to stir trouble once again. She was like a fly – you swat it away, it comes back. You try to smash it, it flies back to the same place again.

''She's a detective'', Maura declared proudly.

''Like the police?'', Joyleen piped in.

''Yes honey. She's a homicide detective'', Maura answered her.

''What do those do?'', the curious girl inquired.

Maura paused a little, to try to find the best word-choice. Already the subject was sensitive, being about death and all. ''When people die, it's because they are sick, or they are in an accident, or they are old. But sometimes they die when another person kills them''. Joyleen nodded her understanding. Margo and tuned out at the word 'detective', already typing away on her phone and moving around the left-overs in her plate. ''So Jane's job is to find out who killed someone, and why they did it. So that person is put to jail and they can't hurt anyone else''

''Cooooool', she dragged out. ''Does she have a gun?''

''Yes''. The little girls eyes widened in astonishment.

''Can I see it?''

''You will have to ask Jane about that sweetie'', Maura answered. Unsure what the detective would have to say about that. She figured it was best to leave it to the two of them.

Margo was uncharacteristically quiet. Maura had been expecting a jibe or snarky comment of some sort. But nothing came. She was relieved they didn't have to go into _that _conversation, though part of her knew it was going to be revisited again soon. A few minutes later they gathered up their possessions and headed home.

* * *

Meanwhile at home, Jane had actually kept her word. The brunette had spent the time after her run making desert. She had called Angela and asked advice on how to make the best cannoli's. She'd made them dozens of times before, but she wanted to know how to make the perfect ones for Joyleen. She succeeded in making three small batches – cinnamon, chocolate, and nutty. She wasn't sure what Joyleen would like and decided a variety would be better. When she was done she rang her mother again and began informing her of how things were going with their visitors. Then she went on to tell her about her and Maura's changed status. The matriarch was very happy for them, and was vastly pleased upon hearing all about Joyleen. She could tell her daughter already loved the kid and she just couldn't wait to meet her. She had obviously wanted to jump into her car and drive over that exact moment, but Jane had to work hard to tell her to stay put and that they'd meet at Sunday family dinner.

Jane then proceeded to make calls to her brothers and her partners. Everyone was eager to know how things were getting along at the Isles' household, but Jane only reported the good news – giving vague details of the arguments that had ensued.

It was around 7:30pm when she'd gotten the texts from Maura with the pictures. She wanted to cry from how extremely adorable they looked. She couldn't help but forward a picture of Maura and Joyleen – teeth sunk in burger – to everyone. The reply she got from them was basically the same : **OMG, That is so cute. **With the exception of Angela who felt a text was inadequate and had to ring back to say it into Jane's ear. She stopped short of calling the blonde…after much begging on Jane's part.

The brunette realized she had about an hour before the trio got back, and decided she'd go out to get something for Maura and Joyleen. Something she was certain would make her blonde shed a cosmic amount of tears (of joy).

* * *

**AN: Who can guess what Jane is going to come home with….**


	16. Captions

**AN: This was a bit rushed, hope it's not so bad. I needed to get it out because I won't have the next one till possibly Wednesday - SORRY! I didn't want you to wait that long. **

**Welcome aboard to all new followers. I'm delighted with the response from everyone. Thanks a lot - really.**

* * *

With Thanksgiving around the corner, Jane was glad that the mall close to them was closing later than usual. She parked her car and dashed off to the **photo shop**. The pictures Maura had just sent her were too cute to be stored in her phone's gallery only. She needed a nice blow-up for all of them to see whenever they pleased. And Jane figured that having a framed photograph would support Joyleen in feeling at home at a new place. She had noticed how the girl had stuck a few pictures of her and her friends on a small portion of the wall, but had no family pictures. It broke Jane's heart, because all Jane had were family pictures, which she cherished to no end. Maura also had no pictures. Jane had found it odd when they first became friends. But it later swelled her heart when the first framed picture Maura ever put in her house was a caption of the two of them in a side-hug. That picture sat by Maura's bed-side table, and every time Jane's gaze caught it she fell in love with Maura all over again.

It meant the world to Jane, to know that she meant _everything _to someone else. Sometimes it scared her, knowing that Maura had placed her heart in her hands for safe keeping. Watching over something very precious can be daunting most often. But the thought that this woman had trusted and believed in her enough to take such a leap left Jane feeling like she'd just survived a tsunami.

The man behind the counter smiled at Jane as she showed him the pictures she wanted to use. He took the time to show Jane around the shop so she could pick out frames from the wide selection they carried. It took her nearly the whole hour to get everything done and she only hoped the three wouldn't be back by the time she arrived.

The Prius wasn't in view as she pulled into the garage – which she was grateful for. It gave her a few minutes to place her gifts before they got back. She hurried to un-bag her purchases and put them in the appropriate spot.

The first was a canvas wall hanging. This one she'd done specifically for the living area. The picture went on the spot Maura had removed the drawing of Hope at _her_ grave site. After that picture was taken off, the spot had remained unoccupied and Jane believed the new hanging would fit just perfectly. She'd selected the picture with Maura and Joyleen smiling directly at the camera. The plates with untouched burgers sat in front of them, with Maura's hand draped around smaller shoulders. They made the most adorable pair Jane had ever seen.

Upstairs, she went to Joyleen's room. She picked a clear and visible area on the wall where she hung the framed picture of the two of them biting into their very large burgers. She knew Maura would prefer to have that particular one stored in her gallery instead, but was certain Joyleen would appreciate it immensely. The last framed one was her favourite, and that one was going on the wall in…their…..or Maura's bedroom (that would be a discussion for another day). This was a picture captioned at the perfect moment, a picture the two hadn't even been aware was being taken – a mistake on Margo's part probably. The woman must have just unconsciously pressed the button, and she had taken Maura with her eyes closed, smile in place. The blonde's one beautiful dimple was deeply showing, as the other was covered by Joyleen's lips. The girl also had her eyes closed, and was placing a kiss to Maura's cheek. Her smile could also be seen, as her other hand pulled Maura closer by the shoulders.

Yes, it was the best. It showcased both their joy and love, and how comfortable they were in each other's presence. She hung the framed photograph just above Maura's chest-of-drawers, where she knew they would see it all the time.

Mission accomplished, she placed the two wallet sized ones she'd made for herself in a clear slot. She'd always wanted to have Maura's picture in her wallet but felt the blonde would find it creepy if she saw it. Many times she'd felt jealous when she saw Tommy pull out something from his wallet and a photo of him with Lydia and TJ showed. Or when the photo of Korsak's son showed in his wallet. Or even when a few customers showed their pictures to Angela over the counter describing their loved ones and the moment the picture was taken. Even her murder victims had pictures of loved ones on their person.

People around her age didn't really produce pictures of their parents or siblings from their wallets or purses. It was always a caption of their significant other or their children. And it hurt Jane because she had neither. Even though Jane had gotten to the point of being proposed to, she'd never even _considered _carrying around a picture of Casey. The first time when she felt she wanted have a picture with her, it was Maura's that she desired.

And now she finally had one. Now she could pull out her wallet to take a credit card out and a picture of Maura and Joyleen would appear. She didn't feel forward, she knew it was only a matter of time before Joyleen was as good as hers too. She already loved her, and felt protective of her. They would be a family, and not even Margo could stop them .

She was in the kitchen, whistling chirpily as she filled the re-heated cannoli's knowing those guys would arrive anytime now. And she was right, five minutes later the door was opening.

''Jane. We brought you a burger, it's the BEST'', the young girl bounced into the house running to the kitchen where Jane was.

''Thank you. Those pictures made me pretty hungry I must say'', Jane took the offered food, as the girl pulled her into a tight hug.

''Will you come next time?'', she mumbled into Jane's ribs.

''Most definitely'', Jane assured her. She meant it. ''I made some cannoli for you guys''.

''Hey'', Maura placed a soft kiss to Jane's cheek.

''Hi'', the brunette blushed.

Margo and Jane offered each other a head tilt as means of greeting. It was more of an acknowledgement really. Clearly neither was trying to impress the other by pretending to like them.

''Oh my God'', Joyleen gasped all of a sudden.

''Honey, are you alright?'', Maura ran to her, heart beating so fast she felt like she was going to pass out if anything happened to Joyleen. Jane continued heating her burger in the grill, she didn't panic because she knew the child paid attention to detail and would definitely not have missed it on her way to the toilet. Margo was making her way in the direction Maura had gone in, silently.

''Oh my God'', Maura repeated the words when her eyes fell on the canvas on the wall. ''Jane'', she breathed. The brunette lazily swaggered to the scene, feeling slightly smug. ''When….how…'', Maura stuttered.

''This is awesome Jane'', Joyleen ran in for yet another hug. ''I love it. Do you like it Maura?'', she asked unsurely. The blonde was just staring at it in absolute shock.

''I do'', she managed to nod.

''I got one for your room too kid''

''No!'', Joyleen exclaimed.

''Yap'', Jane assured her.

The young girl ran up the stairs as fast as her feet could take her, hair bouncing up and down in the process. Maura turned to Jane, but before she could say anything Margo began. ''I'm off to bed now. I could do with a rest''

''I made some dessert'', Jane tried to be civil.

''That's quite alright. I don't really fancy sweet foods. Goodnight'', she directed the parting message to Maura only.

Undeterred, Jane looked back at Maura. ''You like?'', she smiled that full dimpled smiled.

''This is beautiful Jane'', Maura traced her delicate fingers over the canvas before pulling Jane into an embrace. ''I don't know how you thought of this, but I love it. Thank you so much''

''I got two more''

''Maura, come and check this out'', Joyleen called from the top of the stairs. Jane laughed a little at her accent. It was sweet, but she found it funny nonetheless. Endearing also.

The two made their way to Joyleen's room, dessert all but forgotten for the time being. ''Isn't it nice?'', Joyleen looked at Maura for confirmation.

''I'm just glad she didn't put _that _one downstairs'', Maura laughed.

''On the side here'', a small finger pointed to the space beside the framed picture, ''I will put one of me and Jane'', she smiled triumphantly. Jane fell in love with her all over again. First Maura had put their picture together in her room, now Joyleen. She was starting to feel complete.

''Where's the other one?'', the blonde asked.

''Follow me'', Jane led them down the hall, one hand securely around Maura's waist.

Joyleen did a quick look around of the room before her eyes landed on the picture. ''Oh wow. That one's nice too. But I like mine better'', she stated. The young girl obviously couldn't quite comprehend the gravity of the caption the same way Maura could. And tears had begun, rolling swiftly down Maura's cheeks.

''Heeeeeey…'', Jane gathered her in her arms.

''Why are you crying Maura?'', Joyleen asked, looking to Jane in hope of getting an answer.

''I….'', the words couldn't come out.

''She really loves it. And she loves you'', Jane pulled Joyleen so the three of them could all hug. ''And she loves me too'', the brunette added. They all laughed as they held tightly to each other.

''I love you both too'', Joyleen said quietly. She was starting to feel a love she hadn't known before. She loved her mother, but Margo wasn't warm and was almost non-existent in her life. She loved her grandparents, who had devoted most their time to caring for her. But that love was different compared to how she was starting to feel for Maura and Jane. She couldn't explain it, even to herself. It was just a feeling, something you could never make anyone understand with mere words.

* * *

Margo had retreated to her room for the night – exhausted or whatever, the other guys didn't really care. Jane served her cannoli, to Joyleen's absolute delight.

''Please tell me we can make these again? The ones I had before NEVER tasted this good''. The girl moans as she chows down three cannoli's – one of each flavour.

''They really are tasty Jane. Thank you''

''It's okay. Not like I had much to do without you guys around'', she shrugged.

''Awwww'', Jane's favourite girls coo in unisons. Then the three all break off in laughter.

''Today seemed like a rather long day I must say'', Jane breaks the sap-fest quickly. ''feels like Joyleen's been here for days''. It really _did _feel that way. It was only afternoon when they arrived, but they have gone through changed relationship status, arguments, sex, bonding, dinner, baking. Jane even went to the mall. Normally these events would have happened 'one each day'. Had _that _been the case, the entire week would have been over by now.

''What do you normally like to do before going to bed'', Maura engaged Joyleen.

''Play board games'', she clapped her hands in excitement. ''I brought a few with me. Ooh, let's play **Cluedo. **You will love this Jane. Maura said you are a detective''

''Wow. Take it easy kid'', Jane cautioned. The young girl had spoken everything in one breath, hardly taking in some air.

''Okay'', she let out an exaggerated breath. ''Maura said you have a gun'', she changed her line of thought from the board games.

''I am a detective, yes'', Jane said reluctantly, looking to Maura to see if she was in the right track.

''Can I see your gun?'', she beamed.

''No sweetie. Its not safe for me to give it to you be-''

''Not to give me'', Joyleen corrected as if Jane was the child. ''Just to let me see I mean''

''I have it attached to my belt when I'm going to work everyday, so you will see it Monday morning if you are up before I leave'', the brunette dodged smoothly. ''You can see my badge if you like''

''Oh cool'', Joyleen dutifully followed Jane to the master bedroom where the badge (and gun) were safely stored in her bed side drawer. Maura remained downstairs clearing up the mess Jane had made while preparing dessert, and the plates they had left lying around. When the pair got back, Joyleen looked satisfied with what Jane had shown her and was clutching what Maura was certain was a board game under her arm.

''This is not going to be very fair, because Jane is a detective so she is going to solve the mystery faster than both of us'', Joyleen huffed a bit dejectedly.

Maura read the outside of the box swiftly and said, ''I am almost positive this is going to be a very interesting study''….''for me at least'', she added.

''What do'you mean?'', Her girlfriend asked suspiciously.

''Being a detective, I believe you will pick up on the clues faster than Joyleen or I. But your disadvantage is the unfortunate fact that the game is in French, though that doesn't really matter in this instance. Joyleen's competitive advantage is that she has prior experience with the game, and mine is that I am very observant and am a quick learner. It's going to be very interesting'', Maura gushed excitedly.

Jane rubbed her face, certain the _game _was going to turn into some sort of study subject.

Surprisingly enough, the game was enjoyable. Joyleen won. Turns out the most effective thing was practice and experience. The little girl knew exactly what she was doing, and by the time Maura and Jane finally caught the absolute hang of it, Joyleen was already making her accusation – Mrs Scarlet had committed her murder in the ballroom with a dagger. Game over.

The excited girl begged and pleaded for another round but the two adults had to turn her down. They were both exhausted, but most of all, the girl herself was tired they could see. She was just too happy and excited to want to go to bed.

''We'll play again tomorrow night sweatheart'', Maura promised.

''Okaaaaay'', she dragged through sleep laden eyes.

* * *

''Do you need anything? Are you going to be alright?'', Maura nervously asked. It was the girls first night, and Maura wasn't sure what correct protocol for bedtime entailed. Was she supposed to tuck her in? She was definitely too old for bedtime stories. But did she at least take her to her room? Sit with her a little bit? The poor doctor was torn. Asking was going to sound too incompetent on her part. She made a mental note to ask about it when she went to her group session on Sunday.

They separated at the top of the stairs - Joyleen giving them both a hug and kiss goodnight.

''She'll be alright'', Jane comforted Maura as they went through their nightly routine.

''I hope so'', she sighed. ''You know what'', Maura suddenly stood from the dresser-chair. ''I'll just go and have a word with her'', she spoke looking at the picture Jane had framed on the wall.

Jane nodded, and Maura was on her way.

_Knock knock._

''Come in'', came a low reply. Maura entered the room and stood sheepishly by the door, before walking over to sit on the bed beside Joyleen's lying form.

''I just wanted you to know that I am glad you're here. This is your home now honey, and I'd like for you to feel comfortable at all times. This-'', she swallowed thickly, willing herself not to get teary. ''This is all new to me. So there will be many things I don't understand, and don't do right. I need you to do one thing to help me out''

''What'', curious blue eyes met hers.

''I need you to be honest with me. When you're not happy or when you need something, feel free to talk to me, to ask me. Nothing will make me mad at you okay. I want you to be happy here, and loved all the time. There isn't anything here that shouldn't be touched, or rooms that are out of bounds. Do whatever makes you comfortable. And tomorrow we'll go shopping and get all the kinds of food you like to eat, and buy whatever else is missing for you here''

''Okay'', Joyleen nodded. Then Maura went on.

''I apologize for leaving you. When you're older, I'll try to explain it in a way you can understand. But just know it wasn't because I didn't love you''

''I know'', the girl whispered. She was slowly falling asleep now. Maura just couldn't have been able to close her eyes without having said these words to her.

''Goodnight sweetheart'', Maura let her lips linger on the sleeping girls forehead, knowing she'd climb any mountain and swim across any sea to make things right with the girl.

She quietly padded back to her bedroom, hearing Margo chatting away happily on her phone. _Does she ever stop, Maura thought. _

''She alright?'', Jane asked when Maura settled down beside her.

''Yes. She's asleep now. I just wanted to tell her to feel at home and to know that she is loved. And to apologize for leaving''

''That's sweet baby''. Jane turned the lamp off as she spooned her girlfriend.

''I'm glad we did this Jane. The relationship, and taking in Joyleen. Today has been one of the very best days of my life'', she confessed.

''I'm so happy too. And I'm sorry there was so much running around in circles before. I was – _we were – _very confused and scared I guess. But I'm glad we're past that. We'll do this together, and we'll do a damn fine job at it. The relationship _and _the parenting. Thanks for letting me do this with you Maur''

''I can't think of anyone I'd rather it be''

Jane placed a kiss to the back of Maura's neck as the exhaustion from the day's events finally caught up with them.

* * *

**AN: What will Margo be up to on Saturday morning...oh boy**


	17. Morning anger

**AN: This chapter is brought to you courtesy of a hangover, I couldn't leave my bed today so I figured I might as well do something useful. Will get out a much longer chapter by Thursday hopefully.**

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own Rizzoli and Isles.**

* * *

Maybe it was the excitement or the nerves, possibly even both, that had Maura consumed by a torrent of jitters. Butterflies were on the lose throughout her entire body, it was overwhelming. She wanted to scream, to laugh out loud, to run – hell, to fly if she could. Anything really. She was willing to do just about anything in order to keep herself in one place within her body. Because for as much as she was lying down in bed in one place, her insides were all over the fucking place – jumping, hopping, gliding. Jane's arms that would normally be able to keep her at bay were doing a very poor job today.

After turning numerous times, she figured it was worth her while to just get out of bed. The last thing she needed was to wake her girlfriend up unnecessarily at 6:55am on a Saturday. Jane would be livid, and possibly grumpy for the rest of the day. So she slid out of bed, donned on a warm nightgown and headed downstairs. She didn't really have a plan, but figured she'd go into her office and do some online searching. She was due for shopping with Joyleen and she needed to at least educate herself on trending twelve year old fashion, and to figure out what type of food was deemed acceptable. She was almost sure anything sugary and fatty was just about right – judging from Jane's eating practices. However, finding out what the most 'healthy' unhealthy foods were would be helpful for bargaining purposes.

Her impromptu itinerary was wiped off the face of earth when she collided with a fast moving Margo while rounding the corner to head into the kitchen.

''Ouch!'', Maura's hand landed on her source of pain, the area just above her left eye where Margo's elbow had somehow banged.

''I'm so sorry'', Margo pleaded, ''I didn't see you sneaking up on me''. The slightly taller dark blonde held her coffee mug further from Maura so she wouldn't spill any, or worse, burn Maura.

''I wasn't sneaking u-''

''I know'', Margo said. ''I'm just kidding''. She placed her mug on the nearby table. ''Let me see''

''It's fine'', the doctor rubbed the pain off walking into the kitchen.

''It's not. I bumped into you. And your face screams pain'', Margo guided Maura to sit on the stool before she could protest further. ''Here's some ice. That's what you use here right?''

Maura grabbed the small bag of ice Margo pulled from her freezer and placed it directly to the painful stop. The last things she wanted was to go out with a swollen forehead. It was a difficult endeavour it turned out. Margo had elbowed her pretty hard, so it hurt really badly when she put pressure on it. And it didn't help that the she was using an extremely cold method to ease the pain.

''Just leave it. You'll be fine'', Margo said considerately. It's the first thing she's said to Maura since her arrival that's sounded much like her old self – the Margo Maura once knew. ''Can I make you a mocha?''

''Thank you'', Maura accepted, placing the cold bag in Margo's hand. She watched the visitor making herself at home in her kitchen, a sight she had never in a million years ever imagined seeing – her ex in her kitchen! It was like a bad dream.

''So what are your plans for the day?'', Margo tried to make polite conversation. It didn't even suit her.

''I was going to take Joyleen shopping. I am not sure what her preferences in food are. And I suppose we could also pick up any other things she would like to have around the house. If she feels up to it, we may bug some clothes or shoes'', Maura rambled, suddenly feeling nervous about her whole situation.

''That sounds nice. Joyleen does love shopping'', she waited a beat as she passed a hug of mocha to Maura, then stood closely in front of her. ''Is Jane coming with you?''

_There it was. Maura totally had a feeling about this._

''If she likes she can'', Maura answered shortly. Hoping Margo would let it go. It was really too early for this.

''I'm sure she will. I don't see her wanting to spend the day here with me'', she chuckled.

Maura didn't respond, opting to let that particular discussion come to a close. Margo wasn't finished though.

''You have changed a lot since I last saw you Maura'', she began discreetly.

''I should hope so. It wouldn't do for me to be the same person I was twelve years ago would it?''

''No, it wouldn't. But you aren't…..''

''Aren't what, Margo?'', she pressed.

''You aren't much of an Isles anymore''

Maura stared at her in confusion. What was this woman trying to say really.

''I don't think I understand what it is you mean exactly''

''You don't come off as an Isles anymore. I mean, you dress wonderfully, but….'', Maura watched her with a raised eyebrow. ''Your place is'', she raised her hands in the air, ''Small'', she settled on.

''You're joking right?'', Maura actually laughed.

''We grew up in mansions Maura, and now you are living in the small house in BOSTON, of all places'', she said snobbishly, and a little disgusted.

''Well this is my home Margo. Its enough for me, and I love it'', Maura continued having her hot beverage, trying hard not to let the woman got to her. She was just glad she wasn't talking about Jane anymore.

''It's not just the house you know. What happened to the BMW's and Mercedes? You drive a TOYOTA now!'', the word was said like it was a disease Maura had contracted.

''I don't appreciate you judging my life. I didn't ask you about yours did I?'', she defended herself.

''You can if you like, I don't have anything to hide and I'm living up to _my_ standards''

''Well good for you. I'm happy with the way my life is. There are more important things than the size of my house is or what type of car I drive. My money is put to better use now'', Maura was about to stand now, she'd had it.

''So that's why you're dating that police officer now huh, part of your new 'lifestyle change''', she used air quotes. Maura halted from standing up from her chair immediately.

''I'm sorry?''

''I knew it wasn't like you the moment I got here. You've changed to try to make her feel better? Or to make yourself fit into the world of the poor?''

''Jane is a wonderful person'', Maura said harshly.

Margo laughed humorlessly. ''that's all you have to say? She's a wonderful person!'', she sipped on her mocha again. ''How long have you been seeing this woman such that you felt the need to change yourself just to be with her?''

''That's none of your business. You don't even know her'', Maura spat out.

''I know a bit. I can read you know. The internet is a mighty lovely tool. She's probably using you'', she said nonchalantly, like it was any other everyday conversation.

''I don't like that you're here Margo. I don't want you in my life at all'', the blonde said in a dangerously low voice, pacing a little bit now.

''A least one thing hasn't much changed about you'', she had Maura's full attention now so she went on. ''You love too hard. It's the reason we're here today. If you hadn't been so clingy and needy, I would have gotten rid of that pregnancy. You wanted me in your life too much you were willing to do anything to make me stay''

''Don't you dare say that''. Maura starting to feel a pending onslaught of sobs.

''Regardless of that trait, I loved you Maura. I still do. And that's why I listened to you. That's why I kept that child, for _you. _And after all that you left. Is that what you are going to do to Jane too? Just leave. You are here changing your life and doing all these out of character things so she can love you and want to be with you. That's so low Maura. That's why I say you aren't behaving like an Isles anymore''

''I'm not an Isles''

Margo didn't even hear it, it was so low and covered with her now loud sobs. ''You deserve to be with someone in your social level. Someone you can be comfortable to be who you are with''

''I'M NOT AN ISLES'', she shouted.

And before Margo could even ask what that meant Maura had stormed off upstairs.

* * *

The doctor walked straight into the en-suite and banged the door shut. That jerked Jane out of her peaceful slumber right away, as she wondered why Maura would close the door so harshy that early. She was just going to fall back to sleep, knowing by the lighting that it was still too early to be up, but she decided to go to the bathroom. That way she wouldn't have to wake up again.

Her foot almost stopped in the air when she heard Maura's loud sobs coming from the other side of the door. She hurried to open the only thing blocking her from her love, but it was locked.

''Maura'', she called while knocking the door as well.

No answer.

''Baby let me in please'', Jane tried softly.

No answer.

''Maura. What's wrong. Why are you crying?'' Jane would have figured it was Margo, had she known that the blonde was coming from downstairs. Her mind told her that Maura rushed to the bathroom their bed.

''I'm going to take a shower'', Maura said in a small voice.

''Can I use the bathroom first. I really need to go''

If Maura was in her right mind she would have picked up on the ruse. As it was, she just opened the door without thinking.

''Maura'', Jane said in a pained voice. Her girlfriend was standing next to the tub looking small and frail in a nightgown that suddenly looked too big on her. ''Honey what's the matter?''

''I'm just going to take a shower, I need to-''

''What happed to your face?'', Jane's fingers trailed around a small swell above Maura's eye.

''I bumped into Marg-'', Maura stopped the second she realized what she was saying.

''Are you coming from downstairs?'', Jane asked bitterly, already knowing what the answer is.

''I'm okay I ju-''

''You have a bruised face and you're in tears Maura, that's NOT okay'', Jane pulled Maura into her. The blonde's head found home on Jane's chest as the sobs began again.

''Did she hurt you?''

''It was a mistake, we just bumped into each other'', came the muffled response.

''Then why are you crying? Did she say something''

No answer.

''I'm trying to be civil here Maura, but she keeps doing this''

Maura nodded in agreement.

''I don't want to harsh or mean or rude. You know that right?''

Another nod.

''But I can't stand here and watch her make you cry like this, so early in the morning Maura. We were all still asleep for chrissake. Is she on a mission to make your life hell?''

No answer.

Jane knew a thing or two about questioning Maura. If you asked her a question she didn't want to answer she googlemouthed or left out details by using big words to confuse you. If she had no strength for that, she just remained silent. And she had done that two times already now, and Jane was fast getting angry. God knows she didn't want to, but she wasn't going to just stand and watch someone else make Maura sad – no matter the circumstances.

''Here, have a bath'', Jane sat Maura down on the tub and turned the water on for her. ''Is that going to be okay?'', she pointed to the red bump on her forehead.

''It's likely swollen now, I didn't put ice for the recommended amount of time. Possibly red as well, I haven't looked in the mirror''. Maura answered automatically, consciously wondering why Jane wasn't still lashing out. _The appearance of the bruise must have gotten her preoccupied, Maura thought._

''This should be good'', Jane gestured to the filled tub.

''Thank you''. Maura began to disrobe, with the help of Jane of course, who's mind was running down the gutter. She wouldn't let those feeling take over this moment though, there were more important things. But it was just impossible for those fleeting thoughts not to come with Maura's striking breasts in full view.

She settled for a kiss though, as she let Maura soak herself in the water for a little bit. Stepping out of the bathroom, she leaned against the door and let out a loud sigh. For a brief moment, a very very brief moment, she had forgotten she was actually furious with Margo. But as the thought took root, her feet carried her downstairs easily.

* * *

''You're one of those people that don't pick up on things simply do you?'', Jane asked casually, leaning against a wall watching Margo in the kitchen.

''Excuse me?'', she turned to Jane.

''I said, you don't seem to understand things in the simplest of forms do you?''

''I don't know what you're on about about Jane'', Margo shrugged, with no care in the world at all. She was really strange, if Jane thought about it.

''Maura came back upstairs crying. No -'', she cut the French woman off. ''I'm not here to ask what you said to her, that's not my priority'', Jane remained leaning on the wall casually. But nothing about her face, or tone now, said casual. ''obviously you don't take to warnings, or a little bit of roughness. I don't know you well Margo, and I suppose that assumption is mutual''

''So?'', Margo taunted.

''I don't know how you operate where you're from, but here in Boston, things go differently. I hope you hadn't unpacked too much of your things, because your stay here is going to be cut short''

''Says who?''

''Says me. You think I don't see you hiding behind Joyleen. You think you can come here and act however you want'', she pointed a finger to her, furious now. ''You think you can just say whatever the hell you want, make Maura _cry _and then happily prepare coffee in her fucking kitchen?''

''This isn't your house Jane''

''Well fuck you, it isn't yours either. You think Maura is so desperate to make it up to Joyleen that she'll let you continue to make her life difficult while you're here? And you know what, maybe she has come off that way. Maybe she's let you think you have some sort of hold over her'', Jane fully walked into the kitchen now, her anger looming dangerously on the surface. ''Let me tell you something. Before you and Joyleen walked into our lives we were happy and content with what we had. If you take your daughter and decide to leave, Maura will be sad, but it'll pass. She will live. We can have children of our own Margo okay, both her _and _I. So don't go around thinking you're doing us some sort of favour or whatever. Children will always be there, but me, no. Maura loves _me. _She is going to be _with _me. No amount of guilt tripping will ever land her in your arms again. _That _ship her sailed''

Jane didn't really mean all she'd said. She knew Margo had a hold over Maura because of Joyleen, and the worse thing was that Margo knew it, so she was taking advantage of it. Jane needed to make it stop, however she had to.

''That's not true, Maura will do anything for Joyleen'', Margo defended confidently.

''You seem to have forgotten that she left that same child twelve years ago, in a fucking hospital. Don't think that she won't hesitate to do it again''. It was a low blow, for Maura's sake, but Jane had had it up to here with the woman. She'd had these fears from the very beginning of all this Margo/Joyleen business, now she had to put an end to it.

''She would never leave her again''

''Try her Margo, you just try her'', she dared the woman. And Jane loved the fear and uncertainty she could see in Margo's eyes.

Margo began to walk away, and Jane pulled her hand before she went further. ''I believe your purpose in coming here was to help Joyleen settle in and to fill in some paperwork with Maura'', she looked at her with her 'scary detective face', as her friends called it. ''I STRONGLY suggest that you get that paperwork filled out at the beginning of this coming week and leave. Joyleen is settling in just fine, and she can still continue to do that in your absence. Leave Margo, before I make you do it in an unconventional type of way. We don't mess around here'', she warned angrily.

Margo was just about ready to shrink as she watched Jane walk back upstairs.

* * *

**AN: Margo's little visit is reaching its end, Jane can't take it anymore. **


	18. Disturbance

**AN: To guest 'Soul Plains', thank you so much for such a lovely review, it really made my day. And everyone else, I appreciate your support in this, All 319 of you...*melts***

***Warning*...sex down there.**

* * *

Maura was still in the tub, all pruned up after Jane had given herself fifteen minutes to calm down.

_Knock knock._

''Come in'', came the soft reply from inside the bathroom. Jane walked in and perched herself on the tubs edge, throwing an adorable smile to the woman she loved so dearly.

''You aren't going to be too happy when you look yourself in the mirror'', Jane smiled.

''It's bad isn't it''

''That's all? No google-speak for why it looks that way''

''No'', Maura replied softly. She looked sad, and Jane felt a wave of anger course through her. Every part of her body was telling her to just go back downstairs and beat the living daylights out of Margo. But looking into Maura's sparkling hazel eyes, she couldn't help but just sit there, waiting patiently for the fury to dissipate.

''You're very beautiful you know that?'', Jane posed it as a non-rhetorical questions.

''I've been told'', the blonde blushed, unable to locate her box of humbleness.

''Do _you _believe you're beautiful?''

Maura sighed deeply. ''Sometimes I look myself in the mirror and think that I am beautiful, but sometimes I don't see it'', she answered truthfully. Maura was nothing if not honest.

''Why do you sometimes feel like you aren't?'', Jane dipped one hand into the water playing around with the bubbles a bit.

''I can't say for sure. Maybe it's an internal sort of thing'', she shrugged.

''What do you mean?''

''I normally feel like that on days when something trying happens. Like after I met Doyle, or when my mother brushes me off, or after a date with the wrong guy, and after I met Hope and Cailin. Its all those type of things. I just look myself in the mirror and think 'no, I surely cant be that beautiful a woman'''.

''I'm glad you said yourself that it's an internal sort of thing, because it is. You're very beautiful to me Maura. And not everyone will share that view with me, but it doesn't matter. You're with _me, _and when I look at you'', she chuckles a little bit. ''I see one of the most beautiful women I've seen. And I can only hope that that is enough for you, the fact that I see you as breathtakingly beautiful''

''It's enough for me Jane, believe me. I didn't have you _this _way back then, so I think loneliness may have played a part''

''We've done an awful amount of _thinking _this morning my dear. Tell me something that you know to be completely true'', Jane tried to lighten the mood.

Maura thought for a few seconds, eventually landing on, ''I love you Jane'', she stated clearly. ''I love you completely. And if there is one thing on earth I am going to fight for, it is you. Not because I need you, or because I depend on you or because I don't want to live without you – but because I love you''

Jane looked at Maura a little quizzically, unable to fully comprehend what the blonde was trying to say. Her words were in relation to what Margo had said to her that morning. So she'd done a lot of thinking while she lay in the tub. And Margo was wrong, and right at the same time. Maura was desperately in love with Margo at one point, which isn't the best form of love – desperate love that is. That need to be with Margo had driven her impulsive decisions. That feeling of not wanting to be without Margo had led her to ill thought out plans. But it was different with Jane. She knew it now. Because if it was desperate love, she would have professed her feelings to Jane a long time ago. If it was needy or clingy love, she would have begged to be in a relationship with Jane after they had sex. No, what she had for Jane was the healthy type of love – the good love. And she would do whatever she did for Jane simply because she loved her.

''I cant find the right words to explain myself Jane. But I love you, all of you. And everything that comes with you – your job, your friends, your family''

''That's very sweet Maur, I love you too''. Jane dipped down for a slow kiss, one she was reluctant to deepen though.

''I better get out of here, the water is cold'', Maura shivered a bit. The girlfriend passed over her towel and Maura got herself dried up. Looking into the mirror, she realized how awful the bump on her forehead looked.

''My God'', she gasped. '' I hadn't expected it to look like _this''_

''It'll go down soon I'm sure'', Jane sympathized.

''Says the doctor'', Maura quipped.

Jane hadn't expected to laugh out loud so soon after the morning she'd just had. Maura was so unexpected with her jokes these days, it just made Jane's day. She'd never tell her though, but Maura made really good jokes. The blonde often held back out of insecurity, but if she just let herself go, she'd be a very funny woman. Oh and maybe if she made her jokes more around the science-y sort of crowd.

''Funny'', Jane said when her laughter died down.

''Figured'', the blonde replied smugly. She always felt proud of herself when she made a laughable joke, especially if it was Jane that she made laugh so hard. ''But I seriously can't go out like this'', she pointed to her face.

''I would like to say it's okay, but I know once the stares start you're just gonna run back home''. Maura shoved Jane playfully after her last sentence.

''This isn't funny Jane'', she admonished.

''Why are you laughing then?''

''Jaaaane'', she whined. ''I have to take Joyleen for shopping today''

''Yeah, that's gonna be a bit of a problem. You can go tomorrow then'', Jane threw herself onto the bed while Maura walked around tidying the room and grooming herself.

''Tomorrow I have 'impending mothers' from 1-4pm. Then everyone is coming over for dinner. There just isn't enough time tomorrow. Oh my God Joyleen. Who will she stay with?'', Maura panicked.

''Hello'', Jane waved her hand in the air in a sing-song voice.

''Of course, I'm sorry. I'm just starting to get nervous again'', Maura tried her breathing techniques.

''It's okay. Listen, I can take Joyleen out today and we'll just pick up a few things so she doesn't get too sad about not going at all. And then some day during the week we'll go out again, and next weekend too''

''Hoping that I don't bump into anything again'', Maura joked once more.

''You're on a role today'', Jane laughed. Maura hadn't even meant it as a joke, in fact, she was quite serious. That probably was the funniest element of her jokes. She didn't even know what she said was funny half the time. It drove her detective mad with laughter.

''Seriously though, rest while we're out. And you can even sort out things with Ma about tomorrow's dinner while me and the kid head out''. It seemed like an out of the blue decision, as if Jane hadn't put any thought into it. But the detective had. She had no clue pertaining to the details of Maura's run in with Margo that morning. But what she knew is that whatever Margo said made Maura sad and not angry. Margo hit a nerve, and it appeared to Jane that Maura had reached some form of conclusion. She could see a resolve in her blonde. She wasn't going to ask just yet, she was going to give Maura the time and space she needed. Maybe a talk between the two of them while she and Joyleen weren't around was a good idea. If Maura couldn't handle it, she'd call Jane. And Jane trusted and believe in Maura enough to know that she would tell her if things got to a point she couldn't handle.

''I think I might just do that Jane. Your mother and I have a lot to go over about tomorrow. And I haven't spoken to her since Joyleen arrived, I feel awful because of that''

''She'll understand''

Maura walked over to Jane and let the brunette pull her onto the bed. She fell atop a pyjama clad body, as her towel loosened off. ''Jane'', she giggled. Jane was tugging the towel off and pulling Maura into a kiss at the same time. The blonde helplessly melted into her girlfriend. Jane's hand palmed a sizable breast. She'd waiting to do that since helping Maura undress earlier on.

''It feels like a life time since I felt you'', Jane rasped. Her voice overtook by sex already.

''It does'', Maura pulled on Jane's pyjama shirt. It came off with ease, leaving a sight of hardened nipples before her. The doctor meticulously rolled a nipple in her mouth, being rewarded with a deep moan from below her.

Jane could hardly wait, she pulled at her pyjama trousers with one hand as Maura worked her magic on her breasts. Once her pants were off, leaving then fully naked, Maura ground her core directly into Jane's and she could feel her detective shiver in anticipation.

''I want you Maura'', Jane panted. She didn't have to finish and say inside of me, Maura knew.

''Together Jane. I want you too'', Maura placed her thigh against Jane's center, feeling Jane's thigh rub against her core as well.

''You feel so ready'', the brunette breathed, rocking to meet Maura's thrusts for greater impact and friction.

''_You _do all this to me Jane''. Their lips met in a powerful collision, tongues battling to win the challenge of who gets consumed by who.

''Ahhhhhh'', Jane moaned loudly when Maura's thigh began to rub fully against her taut clit. Jane loved the feeling of their bare breasts rubbing against each other – nipple to nipple. She loved the feel of Maura's sweaty skin against every inch of her body. She loved to see the glazed over look her partners hazel eyes turned when she was so ready to just be fucked raw.

''Jane?''

''Yeah'', came the breathless reply.

''I need to feel your fingers inside me''. Maura thought the grinding would suffice, but she was all of a sudden in a penetration mood. Her whole vagina opening was crying to be touched, clenching in protest for lack of a more direct form of friction.

Jane took Maura's hand and was guiding it towards her pussy when they heard a soft knock.

''Maura….Jane? Are you up?'', a shy voice could be heard at the other side of the door.

''Shit'', they said in unison. The door itself wasn't even locked. Thank God for the child's manners.

_Knock knock._

''Morning sweetie'', Jane called out uncertainly.

''No I stop now-'', Maura protested vehemently but was cut off.

''Can I come in?'', came an innocent question.

''I'm just gonna…uh…dress up sweetheart. Can you give me two minutes?''

''Okay. I'll just run downstairs for a glass of milk''

''Good….take your ti-'', the word didn't come to its end as Maura had her wet lips on Jane's already.

''Thanks Jane….I don't think…it was…physically po…ssible for…me to….ah….stop'', Maura said between kisses, frantically grinding into Jane now – who was repeating the same action as well.

''She's coming back soon baby''

''I'm close….come on Jane''

''I'm close too''

''Touch me Jane'', Maura pleaded.

Jane wasted no time in thrusting two fingers into Maura's dripping core.

''Oh Jane go faster…hurry''. Jane didn't need to be told twice. Her knuckles were rubbing against her clit causing sensations of their own. She went harder and faster, lifting herself slightly off the bed to meet Maura halfway. ''Ahhhhh, I'm coming Jane….ohhh don't stop baby'', she screamed low. Jane could feel Maura clench tightly against her fingers as her own orgasm came through.

Maura had come down from her high, but Jane was still going. The brunette's orgasm was a long one this time around, failing to come to a quick finish.

''Jane'', Maura warned. ''She's going to come back any second''

''W-wait….I'm….still cuming'', Jane said through gritted teeth, writhing uncontrollably beneath Maura.

_Knock knock_

She was back. The two adults scrambled onto the floor with a loud thud.

''Are you okay?'', called the concerned child.

''Yes dear'', Maura was the one to answer now, no longer completely consumed by arousal. Jane on the other end, seemed unhappy to draw her orgasm to a forced finish. She grabbed her pyjamas and ran into the en-suite, leaving Maura to wrap her towel around herself and open up for Joyleen. The blonde felt slick juices all over her 'lower regions' as she went to the door, hoping they wouldn't trail further down before she got a chance to clean up – again.

Their sexual encounter officially disturbed for the first time, Maura still had no heart to wipe away the smile gracing her face.

* * *

**AN: Soooo...Joyleen didn't hear anything between Margo and Jane's telling off...phew!**


	19. Leave

**AN: Someone asked me where I got the names Joyleen and Yolanda from. I thought I'd mentioned it but just realized now that I hadn't. Remember S04E02 with the girl called Yolanda that Jane/Rafael got killed. Well I just loved the way the name fell off Jane's lips. And Joyleen is just a name I've always liked for no particular reason.**

* * *

Jane couldn't help but finish herself off in the bathroom. It must have been the fear of getting caught and Maura's hopeless need that had her so turned on to the point of having such a long insatiable orgasm. Feeling thoroughly quenched, she wiped herself off and joined Maura and Joyleen in the bedroom.

''Good morning Jane'', the child beamed, running for a hug and kiss from the tall detective.

''Morning sweetie'', Jane smiled affectionately back.

The ball of energy jumped back onto their bed making herself at home with a glass of milk on Maura's side of the bed.

''Did you sleep well?'', Maura inquired.

''Perfect. I must have been very tired. When I woke up I only heard noises from here so I knew you were awake. Mummy is doing some work''

The two grown-ups were stuck on 'heard noises'. What kind of fucking noises had the child heard?

''Were we making too much noise?'', Jane tried tactfully.

''Not too much. But I didn't want to disturb that's why I was knocking'', she shrugged and took another sip of her milk.

Jane and Maura shared another meaningful look, the two at a complete loss as to what they should say. What Maura did know was that at some point they needed to have a discussion with Joyleen about their love life and the physicality of it.

''Joyleen honey, can we….have a little talk?''. The intelligent woman felt a lot less intelligent in that moment. Regardless, what better time to bring up the topic than now? Jane looked at her skeptically, wishing there was a way she couldn't be part of the conversation, and knowing it wasn't possible.

''Is something wrong?'', the young girl asked uncertainly, a little terrified even.

''Not at all my dear. I…we just wanted to speak with you about our relationship and allow you to ask any questions you may have, if any''

''Okay'', she smiled shyly.

''Jane and I are in a romantic relationship as you know'', Jane cringed at the M.E's words. Joyleen just looked at her seriously. ''And as such, we will portray displays of affection unannounced''. Now the child looked confused.

''What she means to say'', Jane offered in layman's terms, ''is that, is it okay with you to see us kiss or hold each other in the house or at the mall or something''

''I don't mind'', she said surely.

There was an awkward pause before Maura spoke again. ''What you did this morning was advisable. Knocking on the door before entering'', she clarified. Again, Joyleen didn't seem to have caught on. Jane this time around, was in no mood to help out. She was already flustered as it was. She just sat cross-legged from Joyleen and looked expectantly at Maura. ''You are allowed in here honey, anytime you like. But its best that you knock every time just in case we're-''

''I think she gets it. Right Joy'', Jane stopped Maura's unfiltered words.

''I do'', the girl laughed. ''You'll be doing what grown-ups do that I'm not allowed to see'', she spoke a little knowingly.

''Correct'', Jane clapped her hands on her thighs dismissively. She was dying for the conversation to come to an end already. Out of the other two in the room, the brunette seemed to be the only uncomfortable one with the topic at hand. ''Soooo Joy, you and me are heading over to do some shopping hey''

''No!'', she gasped, eyes growing wide with excitement.

''Yap. Just you and me. I'll show you the fine parts of Boston, and we'll eat hot-dogs from the vendors and swim in the lake''

''Jane'', Maura slapped her leg lightly. Joyleen just laughed out loud.

''You aren't doing any of that honey'', Maura warned Joyleen. ''I now feel a little apprehensive about letting you two lose, unsupervised''

''We'll be fine, Jane is the police'', Joyleen tried to calm Maura down thinking the doctor was really worried.

''Yes she is, and the best in the whole of Boston'', she gushed proudly about her lover, stretching out to peck her on the lips. Feeling self-conscious, Jane stretched out and pecked Joyleen on the cheek, who in turn got on her knees to peck Maura's cheek.

''You two are the best'', small arms gathered Jane and Maura by the neck for a group hug. Joyleen was a very affectionate girl. She wasn't reserved in showing physically signs of adoration and gratitude. She was just like Jane in that regard, but less squirmy about it though. But was a complete opposite to Maura on that same front. The blonde never showed such overt affection until Jane came along. And even then, it was still a little reserved and thought of. Joyleen however, just fell into their arms and showered them with kisses whenever she felt like it. It was refreshing for Maura, who really could do with an abundance of affection – physical especially – after all the childhood neglect. Affection from sexual partners wasn't really the sort of affection she needed. What she got from Jane as a best friend and from Joyleen as a daughter was what she had longed for her entire life, and she would do her damn best to return that affection.

* * *

After breakfast and a shower, Jane and Joyleen got themselves ready to head out. Maura gave Jane her credit card for all the purchases she was going to make, along with instruction on the 'proper' things to buy. That was of course the healthy food stuffs, high quality clothes, and un-harmful toys or gadgets. They were both sad Maura wasn't joining them, but were still so pleased they were spending some time together.

''Bye mummy, bye Maura'', Joyleen called on her way out. Her mother was sitting in the living room going through a magazine. Margo had declined the offer to join the two in shopping claiming to have lots of work to do.

Finishing up the final touches on cleaning the kitchen, Maura joined Margo on the couch – sitting stiffly. She finally understood what Jane had been on about when she had said she didn't want Margo coming and making her feel uncomfortable in her own house. It was exactly what was happening now, and Maura wasn't having it.

''Do'', Maura rephrased, ''Would you like me to show you around Boston?''

''Désolé?'', Margo asked. _[sorry]_

''You didn't want to go out, and I am unsure whether it's because you didn't want to be with Jane or if it's just because you aren't interested in seeing Boston''

''It's both actually'', Margo closed her magazine and set it on the centre table in front of them.

''Oh'', Maura said, not expecting such blatant honesty.

''You aren't naïve ma chérie. How do you honestly expect me to like Jane?'' _[my darling]_

''She has done you no wrong Margo''

''You don't get it do you. I love You Maura, I still do''

''Margo…''

''No, let me say this. I know you think I have been awful since I got here''

''Because you have been'', she stated.

''I don't like Jane because she got to have you, okay''

''I'm not sure how you want me to respond to that Margo''

''Tell me you don't feel something for me'', she dared her former lover.

''I don't, sorry. I love Jane now'', Maura firmly replied without missing a beat. ''And I'm sure you are with someone of your 'social class''', she added a little sarcastically.

''You left me Maura. It's not like I had stopped loving you''

''You had''

''No'', Margo defended herself.

''You were sleeping with other people. Words were moot at that point''

''It was just sex Maura''

''Not to me. You hurt me deeply, but I forgave you because I loved you''

''We can try again Maura'', she pleaded. ''We have a beautiful girl. And we can try to be a family again. It would be-''

''Don't say that'', Maura warned. ''You have shown no love or affection for that girl since you've been here. And _now _we can be a family?''

''I'll change. I'll try my best, and do anything to make it work'', Margo shed her first tears. Maura was quite taken aback. The woman had be stone cold since her arrival, tears was the last thing the blonde expected.

''That's not good enough'', Maura told her. ''It's far too late for us. You know that I loved you and cared for you deeply, but it's in the past. I found someone like you, except, she's _much, much _better. Jane is the woman in my life, the only one there ever will be''

''But you aren't even giving us a chance'', she sniffed. Taking the tissue Maura handed to her, ''What if she hurts you?''

''Do you know what one of the worst things about you is?'', a shake of the head is all she got. ''You never once asked about Joyleen's safety, or future henceforth. It might have been flattering if you didn't like Jane because you feared some sort of harm towards Joyleen from her. Your profession of undying love might have held some weight if you had thought Jane wouldn't make great company for Joyleen. But you have not once mentioned any of that'', Maura spoke with surprising calm. ''You're here rivaling Jane for my love, but what about _Joyleen _Margo? Do you even think about her, or care about her at all? And don't give me that nonsense about me not being there twelve years ago. I left, get over it. I'm here now''

''Looking at her hurts'', she confessed quietly.

''What?''

''Looking at her, and thinking about her hurts. I can't love her, because it makes me miss you too much. I look at her and blame her for you leaving. If I hadn't gotten pregnant, if it wasn't for her, you wouldn't have left me''

''Do you hear how that sounds Margo? What happened to you?'', Maura worried. ''None of this is _her _fault. There is a very big chance we wouldn't have been together now regardless of the pregnancy. Leave the poor child out of this. You did this, and I did this, but not her''

''I'm sorry'', Margo dabbed at her now runny nose.

''I'm sorry too Margo. Life _is _what it is''

A small silence descended upon them, before Margo quietly said,

''Can I ask you something?'', she threw Maura a small smile.

''Sure'', came the apprehensive reply.

''When you said you are not an Isles, it confused me. I was reading about Jane yesterday and I came across an article about her shooting your biological father. I know it's none of my business, and quite frankly I didn't even read through it. But then you said you are not an Isles this morning and it got me thinking''

''It _is_ none of your business. And if you read the article you would be sure to find all you're looking for'', Maura cut her shortly. The last thing she wanted was to discuss her complicated family with Margo.

''I'm not looking for a fight Maura. I'm just asking what that is all about''

Maura relented, and shared a few unspecific details about how she found out about Doyle, and how it eventually led to meeting Hope and Cailin.

''Wow. Who would have thought'', Margo remarked. It did really make a thrilling story for anyone in particular. The doctor briefly wondered how she was going to explain it to Joyleen, funny enough she hadn't even considered it before.

Margo began to share with Maura the details of her life since they last saw each other. She talked about Joyleen growing up, about her relationships, and her journalist globetrotting job, and so much more. They shared laughs and surprises, Maura even sharing her unfortunate romance stories. Talking took them into lunch, where they made a salad each and continued talking.

''It's so nice to just talk to you Maura, without the yelling and harsh words'', Margo mused.

''That was all your doing''

''I know, and I'm sorry'', Margo apologized again as they sat back on the couch. Maura wasn't too certain of how sincere Margo was, but didn't quite care at the moment to be honest. Her mind was set on a decision she had made.

''Margo, I appreciate that we have finally managed to have a mature conversation and to lay some feelings and concerns to rest'', she started very serious, shifting in her position so she could face the dark blonde properly. ''I made an appointment for Monday with my lawyer''

''Bien'', Margo listened carefully, a dreadful fear filling her suddenly. _[okay]_

''I want you to relinquish all parent rights to me''

Margo was silent for a few second, thinking of what exactly Maura was trying to say. The blonde already had custody of the girl, but they hadn't discussed taking Margo completely out of the picture. What they had settled on was that they'd see how things go and take it from there, but here Maura was having decided already.

''Why? And when did you make that decision'', she asked out of pure curiosity at first.

''I came to that conclusion this morning. And I would like you to leave as soon as that is settled''

''What?'', came a shocked reply. Margo was totally blind sided. The woman was of the opinion (after their recent talk/catch-up) that things were going smoothly finally.

''First of all this is my home'', she said conversationally. ''I hate that you have made me uncomfortable and unhappy since your arrival. I love Jane, and I also hate that you have made her angry and unsettled since yesterday too. I want more than anything, to be the best mother I can be to Joyleen. But I can't do that with you around here, and I can't do that without full and absolute legal rights to her''

''That's not fair to ask me to do that'', she complained.

''Maybe it isn't, but that's what I want –''

''She's my daughter too Maura'', Margo raised her voice a little. Maura had thought about it in depth, and came to the realization that she was in way going to co-parent with Margo. Angela, with her big mouth and nosy habits, had been spot-on about _that _aspect when they spoke days ago.

''Indeed. But think of what's best for her. I am not saying that you should give me all parental rights so that you never see her again. Joyleen can come to France whenever she would like to see you. But you won't be welcome to come and visit her here'', Maura stated the last part clearly.

''Wow'', was all Margo could come up with, shaking her head in disbelief.

''If you aren't happy with that arrangement, then you can both leave'', Maura swallowed the lump in her throat at the prospect of being separated from a child she loved immensely. ''Joyleen will still be welcome here whenever she likes, but not you''

''But we were chatting happily and getting along fine just now'', she asked confused, and a little desperate.

''We were Margo. But like I said, I made that decision in the morning. And don't be deluded into thinking our conversation was a way to persuade you into making decisions you aren't comfortable or happy with. My mind is made up. You have the whole of tomorrow to think about it, before our Monday meeting. Either way, I would like you gone by Thursday at the very least. If you agree to my proposal, the paperwork should be finalized by Wednesday''

''Why are you doing this Maura?'', Margo asked through tears once again.

''Because I love Jane. She has put me first in a lot of things for a very long time, and she has given me so much you wouldn't even understand. I refuse to sign up for something that will cause us heartache. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if all of this became the cause of my break-up with Jane. You may call it neediness or desperation or whatever you want, but its love. _I_ know that, _Jane _knows that. And that's all that matters to me'', she paused to gather herself a little, speaking calmly as she was all along. ''I love Joyleen too. And she will have a happy and stable home here with Jane and me. For _her _sake, leave her with me Margo. If that child ever meant anything to you, please give her a chance here''

* * *

**AN: I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. What'd'you all think? Is Margo going to take Joyleen away? *hides* **


	20. Togetherness?

**AN: I'm embarrassed at how I just disappeared. Got my head back in the game now, sorry.**

* * *

**AN: I apologize to the guest that feels sorry for Margo. I had so much to say to you (good stuff), but you don't have an account I can respond to. **

* * *

''Maura will kill me'', Jane said backing away from the shop as if it was holding a gun to her.

''Come on Jane, its just ice-cream'', the child reasoned.

''To you. And me. But your other mum….not so much'', she shook her head to emphasize her point. ''Besides, its cold'', Jane added with hope of swaying the girls decision.

''It doesn't matter'', Joyleen stomped her feet impatiently. The blue eyed blonde was standing by the entrance of a McDonald while the elder brunette stood as further away from the shop as she physically could.

''Honey, no. That'', she pointed at the bold **'M' **symbol, ''is THE WORST place we can ever go to buy anything. We will never hear the end of it for the rest of our lives. Maura will _never _let me take you anywhere ever again''

Curious shoppers threw awkward glances at them as they passed by. The scene appeared to be one of a mother and daughter _both _having temper tantrums. And the large distance between them proved than neither was budging.

''Okay'', Jane tried to compromise. ''Why don't we go to an ice-cream place I know. It's close by''

''Do they have a McFlurry there?'', she said, already walking towards Jane.

''Not a McFlurry, but they have other kinds – lots of different flavours''

''But I wanted a McFlurry. Its really my favourite Jane'', the child pouted.

''If I take you to this other place, then next time when we're out with Maura you can ask her. She'll explain exactly why we can't ever go to McDonald's, or any other shop like it''

''Okay. But there better be good ice-cream where you are taking me''

''I promise''

Joyleen grabbed Jane's hand and they walked back to the car to drive to this new place. The young girl as it turned out, wasn't too serious about her shopping. She didn't mind doing it, but was much happier just walking around and munching on snacks. As soon as they got into the indoor mall she ran for the candy stand and bought some treats. And after picking up some accessories in **Claire's **she had spotted the McDonalds. So technically they hadn't bought anything, but were driving off already. God knows _Jane _wasn't complaining.

...

Joyleen wasn't disappointed. Despite the ice-cream being much unlike the McFlurry she was craving, it still tasted wonderful. And she had over a dozen flavours to choose from, leaving her with the ultimate combo of three different flavours.

''Where to now kid?'', Jane asked after they finished their ice-cream in the cold Boston weather.

''We could watch a movie'', the child suggested.

That was certainly better according to Jane. However, chances were that her girlfriend wouldn't be too happy if they returned with no groceries. It also didn't help that all they'd bought was a tone of little items from **Claire's. **The blonde would definitely wonder what they'd been up to the whole time. And when she would find out they had indulged in the badness that was ice-cream, she would accuse them of having had plenty more disagreeable foods.

''Why don't we go grocery shopping first, then we can get Maura and go for a movie together''

''Perfect'', Joyleen clapped her small hands, happy to spend any time with Maura that she could.

The closest supermarket from where they were was **Hannaford, **so the detective headed that way. She was almost sure this was going to be a trying experience for her, so she was completely braced up for the arguments to ensue once they began throwing items in the trolley.

To her great surprise, Joyleen didn't fuss as much as she'd anticipated. The young girl was thrilled to eat anything Jane described as being Maura's favourite. The great hurdle was the snacks and cereal aisles. The French girl had a knack for her sugary cereal, much like Jane. And she also enjoyed munching on something – anything really- throughout the day. So by the time Jane pushed the trolley over to the register, half of it was filled with boxes of lucky charms, cheerios' and coco puffs. Apparently these served the multipurpose of breakfast and snacks. They also had a wide selection of crisps not found in France that Joyleen was dying to try. The other half of the trolley contained what Jane was sure Maura would approve of – fruits, vegetables, rye bread, organic chicken and eggs, and fish.

When they got into the car Jane was about to call Maura when a thought occurred to her, ''you don't have a phone do you?''

''No. I was on Meme's contract so I returned the phone before coming here. I have my tablet though'', she smiled, looking a bit sad Jane noticed.

''Here'', she handed her phone to Joyleen, ''you can ring Maura and tell her we're on our way and she can get ready to go to the movies with us''

''Yay'', Joyleen squealed.

* * *

Maura was more than happy to get out of the house after Joyleen's phone call. Her bump had lessened and didn't look too horrifying anymore. And the tension between her and Margo could have burned the house down if they stayed under the same roof any longer. The dark blonde had begged and pleaded with Maura. She has made endless promises to get on good behaviour, promising to treat her and Jane with respect. She'd even gone as far as promising to be a better mother to Yolanda. But Maura didn't cave, she wasn't going to be so easily swayed this time around. Both Jane and Joyleen deserved better. It was unfair to Joyleen to only start to receive love from her long ago detached mother only because the woman loved Maura. No! Maura paid no heed to what Margo had to say. They went back and forth for a very lengthy time, until Margo finally realized that Maura wasn't the walk-over she used to be. And she began to realize the great force between Maura and Jane, making it abundantly clear that she had no chance with the blonde whatsoever.

When Maura got the call from Joyleen, she's just began to go through her schedule for the coming week. She had requested a permanent assistant Medical Examiner starting Monday up until after the Christmas holiday when Joyleen began school. This had been done the previous week because she knew it wouldn't do to continuously call-in, or to not be present for Joyleen. Her emails, as she was checking them, indicated that her new assistant would be ready for her on Monday from 12pm after her meeting with her lawyer. At least something in her life was on point and didn't require too much emotional strength.

Occasionally, negative thoughts fleeted through her mind. She wondered what she'd do with her assistant and all her spare time if Margo decided to take Joyleen back with her. This was a thought that left her almost completely paralyzed with fear. Despite her bravado when speaking with Margo, she knew she was sure to lapse into a thorough breakdown. Maybe the time would still be needed either way. Trying to push those sour views away, she got ready for their movie outing.

...

It was almost impossible to not hear Joyleen and Jane as they thundered into the house like a heard of elephants. ''MAURA!'', Jane and Joyleen both called out thudding on the floor around the house hastily seeking Maura's presence. ''MAURA?'', they kept calling out.

''Why are you shou-'', she emerged from the laundry room. She couldn't even get the whole sentence out before Jane picked her off the floor by the waist running away from the young girl.

''Jane'', Maura was screaming.

They went in the kitchen where Jane placed her on the counter-top, planting a long kiss to her lips before the blonde could say anything else. Maura, obviously, melted into the contact, after missing Jane for the few hours she'd been gone for.

''Hand it over'', Jane stretched her hand as she turned from Maura to Joyleen. Begrudgingly, small hands extended a white bag to Jane.

''This isn't fair'', Joyleen whined.

''What's going on?'', Maura eyed them suspiciously.

Jane turned her attention back to the woman in her arms. ''We got these'', she held the bag up to Maura, ''at the candy shop in the mall. And there was only one fudge cluster left-''

''It's your favourite'', Joyleen came to stand with them, ''and we both wanted it. So we made a bet that the first one to find and give you a kiss would get to have it'', she finished sadly.

Jane was holding the small piece of chocolate in her hand triumphantly, grinning like a winner. She didn't even notice Maura bring her hand up and grab the fudge cluster from her and before she knew it, the entire piece was in the blonde's mouth.

''Heeeeeeeeey'', Jane whined, bewildered that Maura would actually do that.

Joyleen broke into a fit of laughter.

''Now you don't have to worry about who gets the last one'', she settled the battle between her two girls.

''But I won'', the detective stomped her foot like a toddler.

''You can't do that to the child Jane'', her girlfriend accused.

''It was a game'', the _child _stood up for her afternoon companion.

''See''

''Fine, I see'', she glared at Jane swallowing the last of the cluster. ''But it's finished. So…how was shopping'', the subject was changed.

You can all imagine Maura's reaction upon seeing the unhealthy contents of some of the shopping bags. She was only appeased by Joyleen's excuse of wanting to taste the delicious goodness of American snacks. But Maura was sure to warn her that those things were not going to appear on their usual shopping list. She pouted a bit, but the doctor wasn't budging. Health was a very important thing and anything pointing at the negative impact to it wasn't up for discussion.

* * *

''We're going for a movie''. It was a statement. Margo was sitting on the back porch reading through something as Maura walked up to her.

''Okay'', she answered without looking up at her.

''I would like for you to come…please''

''Why?'', Margo was still upset and hurt about their earlier conversation.

''Let's not get into this again Margo. We're adults and I'm sure we can all enjoy an outing together'', Maura spoke kindly to her. ''And I think Joyleen would appreciate seeing us all together''

Margo thought about it for a few seconds, heavily weighing the pros and cons of it all. The pros must have won, because she then relented.

''Okay, let me just dress up. I won't be long''

''It's okay, take your time. We should be leaving in about half an hour''

As Maura turned to leave, Margo took hold of her hand tenderly. ''Thank you….for inviting me'', she spoke sincerely.

''No, thank _you _for coming along. And it wasn't really an invitation. We're in this together for the greater good Margo, I wish you'd just see that'', she walked away after her cryptic response. Margo was left thinking – for the first time – that she may be the one with the big problem here.

...

''You okay?'', Jane asked after seeing the strained look on Maura's face. Before she got an answer, she saw Margo heading upstairs, indicating that the two had been talking. ''What happened?'', Jane bolted towards her distraught girlfriend.

''It's okay Jane''

''No. It's not okay. You look like a wounded puppy sweetie. Talk to me. Please'', she pleaded with Maura

''Margo is coming with us, she'll be ready in a short while''

''What?''. It was clear that the two had had a chat in her absence, and she was certain things went relatively well since she hadn't been called to rescue anyone. But how had things gone so well to the point of 'spending time' together?

''It will be fine Jane, I'm sure of it''

''What happened Maura. I mean…what did you guys talk about? What did she say to you when we weren't here?'', Jane rubbed the back of her neck uncomfortably. ''Look, I don't mean to pry or anything, but at least talk me. Say something, anything'', Jane spoke swiftly.

''I'll explain to you later Jane. I don't really feel like getting into it right now. Let's just try to have a nice time and when we get back I'll let you know''

Jane didn't argue because she trusted Maura. It was Margo she had a problem with. So eventually the four left for the movie theatre. The child was happy and completely oblivious to the tension between the adults. To their credit, they were trying their absolute best to be civil for her sake especially. Joyleen had jumped into the back seat of Maura's Prius pulling the detective with her. No one had had the guts to object to their seating order, and the matter had remained un-talked about. Jane and Joyleen laughed happily in the back seat, occasionally bringing Maura or Margo into the conversation – the two who had been sitting quietly in the front.

''Hey, have you noticed how we're J's at the back here, and you're M's in the front there'', the youngster observed jovially.

''Interesting'', Maura was the first to answer. ''I hadn't realized that''

''I think J's are the coolest'', she boasted.

''How so?'', Maura asked her.

''Well'', she cracked her brain. ''We talk and laugh a lot. You guys are quiet. Oh yes, and we are very funny'', she hooked her hand with Jane's.

''That's right kid'', Jane answered this time. Saving Maura from what she was sure was a challenging description from Joyleen.

Margo wasn't sure if her daughter had always been this talkative, or if she just didn't know her at. Her thoughts didn't fester forth, because they soon pulled into the parking lot. ''Okay, we're here'', Maura added needlessly out of want for something to fill the awkward silence descending.

The four made their way to the cinemas. Unfortunately, they're chosen film didn't start until 6:50pm. That meant they had a whole half hour to kill before it started.

''Can I get a drink?'', Joyleen pointed to the fountain machine.

''No'', Margo spoke. Two sets of eyes looked at her in wonderment. Joyleen understood already though.

''Why not?'', Maura asked out of pure curiosity. She didn't condone carbonated beverages but was okay with the exception of once in a while, for example at the movies.

''She drinks a whole cup and then hardly sees the film because she'll be going up and down to the toilet''. Margo had not said much to Joyleen since their arrival, appearing uncaring and unconcerned about her wellbeing. It didn't seem like the woman knew anything about her daughter at all.

''That's understandable'', Maura replied, then turned to the young sulking girl. ''Why don't we wait for the movie to start then we can get one of the small bottled drinks and anything else you'd like''. That seemed to appease her, she smiled widely and pulled Maura over to a nearby jewellery shop. That left Jane and Margo standing in shock and silence.

Deciding to break the ice, Jane began ''We can take a seat here while we wait'', she kindly gestured to the sitting tables in front of the movie-house entrance. ''Can I get you anything?'', she asked curtly.

''A bottled water'', she tested Jane's genuineness. The detective _was _being genuine as it turned out. She figured Maura was trying hard to make piece, and supposed it wouldn't be a bad thing if she tried too. She returned two minutes later with two bottles in hand. ''Here'', she offered one.

''Thank you'', they sat opposite each other silently.

''So…what is it you do again?'', the question came out curiously as if she didn't already know.

''I'm a journalist'', came a decent answer.

''Interesting. I guess that's why you travel a lot hey''

''Yes. I do a lot of work all over Europe and Australia''

''Wow'', the detective mused.

''I was supposed to be in Japan right now, but I ended up changing that around''

''That's why you're so busy right''

''Yes. My work partner had to go alone so we need to be in touch ALL the time so I can help out from here''

''It's nice that he or she was understanding of your situation'', Jane continued with the safe conversation, hoping it wouldn't turn sour at any point before her girlfriend returned.

''He was'', she left it at that.

Silence enveloped them for a short while, each wondering what a safe topic to discuss would be. The heading ''Maura'' or ''Joyleen'' was out of the question definitely.

''I'm sorry about your mother'', Jane settled on.

''It's alright. Life is messed up right?'', she shrugged.

''Indeed''

They sipped on their water, both thankful when they saw Maura and Joyleen heading back.

The blonde watched them in amusement. Her girlfriend, chatting with her ex-girlfriend. She had enough material to write a book if she ever got the time. ''Hey'', she said to the two, placing a hand on Jane's shoulder – her way of asking if everything was okay.

''Hello'', Margo answered. Jane just smiled at them. It was time to get in so they made a single file towards the entrance – Joyleen, Maura, Jane, Margo , in that order. Maura handed Joyleen the cash, who was happy to be familiarizing herself with dollars having been accustomed to euros her whole life.

At the food counter, Maura had to hold herself. Jane and Joyleen were a lethal food combination. Between the two of them they had nachos and pretzels with cheese, two bags of m&m's, large popcorn, and a large drink for Jane. Maura had to even it out by not buying anything at all so she could pick from what they already had. Margo just got a small popcorn and another water.

Without incident they watched the movie. Margo sat next to Maura, and Joyleen settled between Jane and Maura. They all laughed and enjoyed the movie. To no ones amazement, Jane and Joyleen finished all the food they had bought. Maura and Margo even talked a lot during the film. By the time they were heading home, the four were in happy spirits and the tension had vastly decreased.

...

''Sit with me'', Joyleen requested. ''Please, please, please-''

''Okay, okay, sweetie'', Maura gave in.

The sitting arrangement changed on the way back home. It was Jane and Margo's turn to sit uncomfortably in the front this time around. Surprisingly the ride back home was shorter. Maybe it's just because Jane drove so much faster than the doctor did.

When they got home, the child was thoroughly exhausted. ''goodnight'', she kissed her mother, and then her other mother (Maura).

''Bonsoir Yolanda'' [goodnight], Margo bid her off painfully. She watched as Jane and her daughter headed upstairs, wondering how someone can fall in love with someone in just two days. She had twelve whole years to love Yolanda, but it just never really matured. She did love her, but it was more of an obligatory kind of love. She cared for the child, but knew it wasn't enough. That's why she'd opted to have her adopted or fostered. So the girl would be with parents that would always put her first. She couldn't do that. And looking at Maura and Jane, she was certain they were the type of people that would give up their independence, or careers even, for their child. She was 100% sure relinquishing parental rights to Maura was the best thing for her daughter, and her as well. But was she selfless enough to do that? Selfless enough to make a woman who no longer loved her happy? She wasn't sure yet.

* * *

Maura went to Margo's bedroom when Jane and Joyleen headed to the girl's bedroom. Joyleen had said she wanted Jane to help her connect her Ipad to the internet so she could catch up with her French friends.

...

''Come in'', Margo answered. The dark blonde was only in her bra and panties. She was about to head for a shower.

''Sorry, I'll co-come back later'', Maura faltered a little.

''It's okay Maura. Its not like you haven't seen me like this before'', Margo smiled brazenly.

Maura neglected to mention all the reasons why it was so different now, and instead pulled the door closed a little as she walked further into the room.

''Thank you again….'', Maura let the sentence trail. She wasn't sure if she was thanking Margo for coming out with them, or if she was thanking her for not making a scene, or….whatever the reason was, she just felt the need to thank the woman.

''Thank you too'', she shrugged. She hung her dress and put away the clothes she'd changed out off earlier while waiting for Maura to state the reason for her visit.

''I just wanted to let you know'', she started slowly. ''about tomorrow. You see, every Sunday we hold a family dinner here''

To say Margo was surprised would be an understatement. The woman held back from spitting, ''_what family?''_

Seeing Margo's surprise, she elaborated. ''Jane's family _is _my family. Her mother and two younger brothers will be here. As well as the wife of her younger brother and their son. Two very close colleagues from work will be here too''

Margo actually laughed out loud a little, ''You're serious?'', she looked at Maura.

''Of course, why not?'', the doctor asked defensively.

''It's okay Maura'', Margo held her hands up in peace. ''I guess I just remember you being so unsociable and uncomfortable around people. You really _have _changed'', she smiled knowingly at the blonde. Maura reminisced briefly about the person she was twelve years ago and began to laugh together with Margo. ''I guess you want me to be at my best behaviour tomorrow?'', she used a light tone.

''In essence, yes''

''I promise'', Margo said seriously, and then moved to walk closer to Maura.

''I won't be around from 1pm till 4pm….'', she trailed off again, watching Margo intently.

''So it will just be me and Jane and Yolanda?'', she said with a smirk.

''It's not funny Margo'', Maura smiled. The blonde was still on a high from her very lovely evening and found it easier to handle Margo that way – lightening up a bit.

''We'll be fine Maura. We were talking and getting along fine today. I'm pretty sure we're make it for three hours without you. And we'll have Joyleen to be the peacemaker''. At this point Margo was now in front of Maura, as they both laughed at the joke. The dark blonde gazed at the beauty that was the hazel-eyed woman in front of her. ''You're a good woman Maura'', she smiled sweetly at her and tried to pull her into a hug.

''Margo'', Maura tried to take a step back. She was suddenly surprised at how fast Margo had moved into her personal space.

''It's just a hug Maura, I'm not coming onto you'', they both chuckled as Maura allowed Margo to pull her into an embrace.

Detective Rizzoli chose that time to step out of Joyleen's bedroom and heard the light laughter from the room next door. To her utter destroyal, there before her was her girlfriend in the arms of a former lover, who was by the way, only in a bra and underwear.

* * *

**AN: OH Jane *sighs*…or should I say OH Maura….wait...NO…OH Margo!*sighs again***

* * *

**AN: OMG, I totally googled 'fudge clusters' and the second thing that came up on images was a picture of non-other than Dr. Maura Isles. So yeah, I screamed, and made a total fool of myself. But come on, its Maura! Who wouldn't? **


	21. Platinum

**Especially for MB1810...speculate no more**

* * *

**Disclaimer : I do not own Rizzoli and Isles.**

* * *

**AN: Thanks a lot you guys for your wonderful reviews and thanks to all of you lovely people following this.**

* * *

Anger manifests when one's basic boundaries are violated. Margo had gone above and beyond.

People have said that others have learned tendencies to react to anger. Jane Rizzoli was one of those.

The brunette would have lashed out, wanted to burn the house down. In fact, she was sure she could set the whole of Massachusetts alight with her wrath. But no. She wasn't going to allow Margo that pleasure. She wasn't going to let her mood be dampened. She wasn't going to start to not trust Maura. Whatever was happening was Margo's doing. It didn't answer the question of why Maura was the one in Margo's room. Or why the door was almost closed. Or why Maura had permitted Margo to converse with her in such a state of undress. Or even why Maura was hugging Margo back. THOSE questions would be answered by Maura accordingly. The blonde would surely have a reasonable explanation Jane was certain. Margo was the one at fault here.

And before anything else could happen, could be thought, Maura and Margo disentangled. The latter was the first to spot Jane over Maura's shoulder. The look on her face – whatever _that _was – is what caused Maura to turn back. When her eyes met with Jane's, she was convinced of only one thing. That she had made the absolute best decision in telling Margo to leave her house ASAP. Because her brunette girlfriend looked at her with nothing but confusion. And if it was anyone else that didn't know Jane quite so well, they wouldn't understand the gravity of such an act. Jane wasn't the 'sit still' type. Or the 'we'll figure it out later' type. She was the 'what the fuck is going on NOW' type. But here she was, watching Maura with trusting eyes, waiting for her girlfriend to explain what was happening. And in that moment Maura fell in love with her all over again.

''Goodnight'', she turned to Margo indicating her departure and walked away. She took Jane's hand at the door and the two walked back to _their _bedroom in silence.

The first thing Maura wanted to do was to pull Jane into a kiss, and make love to her for as long as possible. She want to further cement how she felt about this woman, to make Jane feel her absolute undying love. Because at this point she was won over by the fact that action could leave a much more powerful impact. But she was scared. Scared that her girlfriend wouldn't understand where she was coming from. Scared that her girlfriend would go on longer with unanswered questions. So she used her words to the best of her ability instead.

''Thank you'', she spoke clearly.

Jane didn't want to answer. She wasn't sure which emotion to settle on yet. They were many, and they weren't all good. She wasn't ready to let herself go in that manner just yet. So she sat quietly and waited for Maura to direct her emotions. Because God knows she needed direction. And what better person to get it from than from Maura. Regardless of the fact that _she (Maura) _was the cause of the turmoil in the first place.

''Thank you for trusting me enough to let me explain what was happening''. Maura deemed it safe to go and sit next to Jane on the bed, albeit leaving a little more room than usual. ''would you like me to explain what happened from after you left this morning with Joyleen, or to begin with what you just witnessed?'', she spoke calmly. They _had _spoken about having to talk about _that. _

''Maybe it would make better sense if you just started all the way from the beginning'', Jane reasoned. She wasn't usually an emotionally rational person, so her answer surprised both her and Maura.

''I uhhhh…'', talking about it suddenly seemed harder than she'd anticipated. ''I uhhhh, asked Margo to leave….th-this morning'', Jane looked at her with wide eyes, then she corrected herself quickly. ''I mean…I asked her leave before Thursday. I gave her an ultimatum of sorts'', the blonde stammered uncharacteristically.

''Maura. What are you talking about?''. All…anger?, was gone as Jane fully turned to Maura, her interest reaching high points.

''I told her to sign off all parental rights to me on Monday when we meet with my lawyer. And I told her the paperwork will be completed by Wednesday so she should be gone by Thursday at the latest''

''Wow'', Jane breathed. She had not in her wildest dreams ever thought of such a thing, let alone thinking that Maura would think it. She was shocked at the very least.

''I thought about it a lot Jane. And I hope it's the right decision. I can no longer stay with her here. Your mother was right you know, I'm not prepared to co-parent with her. I don't want to co-parent with her. And she's making our lives miserable here. We just began a relationship Jane, we should be happy and in what they call a 'love bubble'. But here we are battling ex-lovers, under our roof. She must go Jane. But…..'', she sighed dejectedly.

''What's wrong Maur?'', Jane took Maura's smaller hands into her own.

''She said it wasn't fair and I told her that she could take Joyleen and leave if she didn't wish to sign the papers. Oh Jane…what if she takes her away'', Maura began to sob.

Jane was crying for another reason though. She couldn't believe how it was possible that Maura could do exactly what she warned Margo she'd do. Her and Maura hadn't spoken to each other about the separate conversations they had with Margo in the kitchen. But somehow it had led to this. It had been an empty threat when she'd directed it to Margo. She knew Maura loved her and would put her first before a lot of things. But the situation with Joyleen was delicate and complicated, leaving Jane unsure of where Maura's loyalties lay fully. But now her unasked question was answered. Now her fears were melted and evaporated into nothing. She wasn't sure how it was possible, but in that moment Jane fell for Maura again. Deeper into the abyss that was their love. And though she could see some light before, indicating that there was a way out, now she was in complete darkness – a good kind of darkness. Like being wrapped up in a blanket with the love of your life and you are not even concerned about seeking a source or light. Or disentangling yourself. Or peeking out to breath-in fresh air. You are just happy to be lost in complete darkness together, knowing that there is no place you'd rather be.

''I love you'', Jane whispered into Maura's hair over and over again. It was one of those moments when you fell in love with someone and don't even care about being hurt in the end. Because being with them for however long you could is better than anything else in the world, and worth all the pain that could or could not come.

''Look at me'', Jane pulled away from Maura and took her hands once again. '' Every mother loves her child no matter what. Margo isn't stupid Maura. She knows that Joyleen being here with you is what's best for her. So regardless of what happened or happens between all of us here, Margo will choose what's best for Joyleen. If she doesn't then she's a fool. And if it comes to that, we'll see what we can do okay. Don't beat yourself up baby'', Jane placed several kissed all over Maura's kissable face.

''Thank you Jane'', Maura wiped at her tears. And Jane's too.

''So…is that all you talked about?'', Jane continued the conversation sensing there was more to be said.

''She said she was still in love with me and doesn't like you because you have me''. Expecting a bit of anger, Maura was surprised when Jane chuckled. ''What?'', the blonde asked shyly.

''I don't think anyone has ever been jealous of me all my life. Not to mention someone like Margo'', Jane chuckled nervously again. It was easy for Maura to forget how insecure Jane actually was. Her well placed confidence and dominance covered up that insecurity very well. When Maura remembered, she was reminded how Jane felt insecure about her body, her scars, her worth in Maura's life, and so forth. Many times she'd declined going to functions with Maura only because she felt she didn't fit into Maura's world and would embarrass her.

''I wish you just knew Jane'', Maura whispered.

''Knew what?'', Jane cast her eyes to their entwined hands.

''What you mean to me, and what you are in my life''

''Tell me'', Jane shrugged.

''I believe that's the source of the problem my dear. I fear I may have been doing a lot of telling. I want you to _understand _not to just know. I want to _show _you how much you mean to me. I want to _show _you what you are to me''

Jane was imagining Maura was going to make slow tender love to her all night, reaffirming that Jane was beautiful and she enjoyed the physical give and take. But no. Maura stood up and began getting ready for bed.

''Okaaay'', Jane muttered to herself, getting out of her clothes so she could take a shower.

…..

Quietly she went into the bathroom while Maura slipped into bed checking a few things on her Ipad. When Jane returned, Maura was lying on her side doing absolutely nothing but staring into space. ''What's on your mind?'', Jane asked while getting into a pair of pyjama's.

''I was just thinking about dinner tomorrow. I may be getting a little paranoid'', she sighed.

''What could go wrong? Margo, Tommy, Ma'', Jane snorted. Those three were the worst of the whole bunch that would be there tomorrow.

''It's going to be a disaster isn't it?'', the blonde asked softly, scooting closer to Jane when the lanky woman got in bed.

''Most likely yes. I'm sorry in advance'', Jane kissed Maura's temple.

''It isn't your fault. We'll just do our best to not let things get completely out of hand. At least we'll have four law enforcers around'', she said seriously.

Jane almost lost her breath laughing. ''What's so funny Jane'', the blonde genuinely asked.

''You're so hilarious Maura, you don't even know'', Jane wiped the tears in her eyes turning Maura over and spooning her.

''Lucky I have you to remind me''

''Yes''

A wave of contemplative silence took hold, before Maura spoke again. ''When you saw me in Margo's room'', she began tentatively. ''I had gone to inform Margo about dinner tomorrow and I was pleading with her to be as nice as she possibly can''

Jane didn't answer. The sight of Maura in Margo's arms flashed before her and she had to pull Maura into her a little more for her own reassurance.

''I didn't know she wasn't dressed and when she said I could stay I just figured I could say what I had to say and leave without causing any problems''

''And then you ended up in each other's arms?'', Jane's tone was more amused though, than bitter.

''She was saying how she found it funny that I now a large family coming over for dinner. Because you know…I was…always reserved and lonely back then. So we just laughed about it and she pulled me into a hug''

''It's okay Maur'', Jane kissed the back of her neck. ''I trust you, its her that I don't trust. And I obviously didn't like the fact that she was almost naked''

''I can understand how it can easily be misinterpreted, I'm sorry''

….

''Oh no'', Maura suddenly shot up from her position a few minutes later.

''Jesus Maura, what the hell?'', Jane shot up too.

''I'm so sorry. I just remembered something''

''What?''. Maura was already out of bed rummaging for her purse in the dark. ''You could put the light on you know'', Jane teased.

''Of course. I don't know what I was thinking'', she switched on her side lamp, and easily located what she was looking for.

She then pulled out a small ring box and feeling self-conscious, slowly handed it to Jane.

''Maura what's this?'', Jane reached out a shaky hand to take the small box, her mind going a mile a second. _This isn't a proposal is it? Of course not, she mentally slapped herself. People don't propose like this. And why would Maura be proposing to me NOW? No, it's not a ring. Maybe some earrings? Yes that should be it. Why the fuck are you asking yourself all these questions, open the damn box. She was yelling at herself very loudly. _

''Remind me never to propose to you'', Maura laughed climbing back onto the bed.

''Why?'', Jane got out of her tortured state.

''You look like you've seen a ghost Jane. And look at your hands'', she pointed to the detectives hands, ''you're shaking like a leaf''. Jane smiled and attempted to still her betraying hands. Mission accomplished...sort of, she took a deep breath in and opened the box. There in the center, sat a platinum ring.

* * *

_Earlier on…._

_Maura and Joyleen walked into the jewellery shop hand in hand. ''Why don't we get something for Jane'', Joyleen casually suggested. ''You know, I haven't seen her ever wearing jewellery'', she spoke as if she'd been seeing Jane all her life. _

''_Jane doesn't like jewellery'', Maura stated matter of fact. _

''_Well lets buy her something she might like then. A neckless, a ring, earrings'', Joyleen pointed her finger to all the various items in the small shop. _

''_You know, she wouldn't even wear it. Her job doesn't allow her to wear these kinds of things''…. ''Maybe just a ring I suppose'', she added as an afterthought. Married officers _did_ wear their wedding bands. _

''_Cool, let's get her a ring then'', Joyleen tried to persuade Maura as she scanned the shop looking at all the various types of rings. _

''_Could I assist you in any way?'', a lady a few years older than Maura asked. _

''_Oh thank you, but I don't think I will be purchasing anything'', Maura replied curtly. _

''_Your daughter seems to want something though'', the shop assistant smiled as she looked over at Joyleen. _

_Maura didn't correct her. Firstly, she didn't know how. Then secondly, it was only a matter of days before Joyleen would be her daughter so it was wise to start getting used to it. Besides, Joyleen _was _her little girl. ''She insists on getting my friend something, but the person she has in mind doesn't wear jewellery''. Maura hadn't yet got to referring to Jane as her girlfriend in public. It had only been two days, and they hadn't had an appropriate encounter for that yet. In fact, she didn't even realize her slip up. _

''_Maura, come and see'', the girl beckoned her. The other lady followed as well._

_Joyleen was looking at a cabinet with gold rings of all shapes and sizes. _

''_Get one of these. They are beautiful Maura''_

''_Oh no honey. Jane would not wear any of those. And it wouldn't be appropriate''. It was no secret that Jane wasn't a flashy person. And not just because she wasn't wealthy, it just wasn't in her nature. The brunette liked the simple and necessary things. She liked to be comfortable and didn't enjoy drawing attention to herself. An expensive gold ring would sit in a box by her dresser till the end of time, regardless of how appropriate it was. _

''_What kind ring did you have in mind'', the assistant did her job._

''_I didn't have anything in mind actually'', Maura told her._

''_Please, do look around. This friend…what is the occasion?''_

''_There is no occasion-''_

''_I just wanted Maura to get her something because she doesn't wear any jewellery'', Joyleen piped in._

''_I see. I'm guessing she doesn't like anything too fancy'', the woman probed. _

''_Certainly'', Maura assured her. _

''_Have a look here. We carry a selection of friendship rings which are good for 'no occasion'. And we have some here in….let me see'', she searched the display for what she was referring to, ''aha, platinum. It's not too flashy so it won't be that noticeable. You could pick a thinner kind, which is more comfortable for everyday wear and for someone who doesn't quite like wearing jewellery. And you see, some have engravings on the inside or outside. If you wanted, I could even do a personalised one for you'', she continued rattling off but Maura's eyes had already landed on exactly what she wanted. _

''_I'll take that one'', she blurted out of nowhere, pointing to the ring that caught her eye. _

''_A-are you sure?'', the woman stammered. _

''_Positive''_

_Maura paid for that ring and her and Joyleen were on their way. The woman was shocked to no words. This woman had walked in with a child she claimed was her daughter yet the girl called her by her first name and had a French accent while the mother had an American one. And then she just purchased a $1599 'no occasion' ring for her friend without a second thought. She briefly considered calling security but decided to just mind her own business and enjoy her commission._

* * *

''Oh my God Maura'', Jane gasped. Despite not caring for accessories, Jane was dumbfounded. She picked up the ring and scanned it with watery eyes. Both edges were a shiny platinum, while the middle was pale platinum. Tilting it a little she read out loud the inside engraving ''Friendship, Love, Trust''

''Joyleen noticed you don't wear any jewellery and suggested we get you something. Its platinum, and will never change colour when you put it in any substance. It wont dent or bend or scratch. I don't mean to say you have to wear it all the time - to work or anything. But if you decide to, its perfectly safe for anything really. They say it lasts a lifetime. And it isn't too noticeable-''

Jane cut her nervous talk off with a strong kiss. It led to tongue battling and moaning, until the need for air was pertinent. ''Do you like it? It's a friendship ring'', she asked breathlessly looking into Jane's wet eyes.

''I love it'', Jane breathed back.

''Even if we're in a relationship now Jane, our friendship still means everything to me'', she confessed.

''I never wear jewellery because no one has ever bought me any'', Jane made _her_ own confession. ''I guess people always assumed I don't like it''

''I suppose jewellery feels nicer to wear if it's a gift'', Maura shrugged.

''Yes''

Then Maura took the ring from Jane and pulled out the detective's right hand. She sat cross-legged mirroring Jane's position and angled the ring to Jane's thin long middle finger. ''I love you Jane Rizzoli. And I hope this ring will remind you every day of what our friendship means to me'', she ran her own finger over the words 'friendship' and 'love' inside, before she got to 'trust'. ''I trust you with my life Jane. Every day, and always. But most importantly, I trust you with my heart. I know that you'll protect it, and care for it. And I know that you'd never intentionally hurt me. I just hope this ring will serve as a reminder to you of that, always'', and she pushed the ring in all the way to the base of Jane's finger. It sat there perfectly, an exact fitting to Jane - plain and beautiful, and not too feminine.

The tears rolled out of Jane's eyes without her permission. She was touched. She couldn't comprehend how she deserved someone so precious.

''I will cherish this ring Maura, together with our friendship and love. You don't ever have to worry about your heart, I promise it is in good hands'', she cleared her throat of the clogging emotions. ''you can trust me, and I promise to never let you down…never'', she emphasized.

Maura kissed the ring on Jane's finger and pulled her into a tight her hug. From the back of Maura's shoulder, Jane looked at ring again. She could feel the weight of it, and just by looking at it knew it was pricey.

''Can I ask how much you bought this for?''

''No'', Maura shot back. ''but I know you have your ways of finding out if you really wanted to''. Jane smiled coyly, happy that Maura knew her so well. ''Just know that the monetary value of this - how little or how much it cost - has nothing to do with it's significance.

* * *

**AN: This was really sappy wasn't it? I managed. I somehow feel this is not my territory….you guys know best anyway. For those that follows me on tumblr...did you see that picture I posted of Jane this afternoon?...hahahaha**


	22. Mind made up

**AN: I have the next three chapters written so you won't have to wait long...And the next one for 'ALL over me' is coming soon to those reading that.**

* * *

When Jane woke up, she found Maura propped on one elbow gazing lovingly at her.

''That's very creepy Maur'', Jane's groggy voice filled the air.

''That I'm watching my girlfriend sleep?''

''Yes'', Jane said exasperatedly.

''You're very beautiful'', the deadpanned response came, both women making no intention to move. They stayed that way till Jane remembered.

''Hey, you know I was thinking'', Jane caught the doctor's interest. ''Joyleen is going to need a cellphone asap''

''I wouldn't say as soon as possible'', Maura responded after thinking about it for all of five seconds.

''Maura she-''

''-just got here'', Maura cut her. ''she won't be going anywhere on her own anytime soon. Who will she even call anyway?''

''She's twelve Maura. It's only some months till she'll be thirteen – a _teenager. _So she probably needs to facebook and instagram her friends every two minutes''

''I hardly-''

''Maura'', Jane cut her off this time. ''She needs a phone. Talk to her about it okay, trust me'', Jane fake pouted on behalf of Joyleen. She had a small idea what the child was facing having to be without the direct means of social networking. It was a concept she knew Maura wouldn't quite understand, so she had to help the two out a little bit. She'd felt bad the night before after helping Joyleen connect her laptop to the internet and the girl had to catch up on literally hundreds of messages and posts from her friends. The poor kid had been moved to a whole new continent and was going to suffer through a social back-step. The least they could do was at least provide her with the virtual substitute till school started for her after the Christmas break.

…..

''Is it really creepy though, when I watch you I mean?'', Maura genuinely asked after their shared shower half an ago.

''It is, if its another person you are watching like that. But you're allowed to watch _me''_, Jane smirked.

A soft knock at the door interrupted them. Jane was dressed in her usual home wear – sweats and a jumper.

''Come in'', Maura called out. She was still in search of an attire for the day. A pyjama clad Joyleen stepped in holding her glass of milk.

''Morning'', she kissed both Jane and Maura on the cheeks.

''Morning my dear'', Maura lovingly smoothed out her short loose hair. ''did you sleep well''

''Yes. Are you going somewhere?'', Joyleen asked upon seeing Maura pulling on a dress.

Looking to Jane for some form of support, she explained. ''I have a group session I attend every Sunday. So I have to leave before 1pm. But I will be back at four''

''At four'', Joyleen gasped, eyes wide.

''I didn't know how long three hours was until last Sunday'', Jane shared. She vividly remembered how horrible waiting for Maura that afternoon was, as if they hadn't been separated for longer before.

''Oh Jaaaaane'', Maura cooed, kissing the brunette to let her know how touched she was.

The young girl then spotted the ring on Jane's finger, ''Oh look, she's wearing it Maura''. Joyleen walked over to Jane and took the larger hand for closer inspection. ''You like it?'', she asked Jane.

''I love it. It was a very good idea you had there Joy, thanks''. Joyleen felt proud and elated. Useful even. As if she were the one who had bought the ring and placed it on Jane's finger. Maura on the other hand, was at that point right above being able to describe how you feel. She simply didn't have the right vocabulary anymore. _Maybe I should pick up another language, Finish maybe, she mused absentmindedly putting on her clothes. _

''Wanna make breakfast with me kid?''

''Yes yes yes'', Jane ran downstairs with the child.

…..

''About last night'', Margo began when she met Jane in the kitchen.

''I already talked to Maura about it'', she raised her hand to silence the French woman, ''So there is no need to discuss it again with you''. Jane's words were crisp and devoid of any emotion. She didn't want trouble so early in the morning, especially knowing more was to come later on at dinner time.

Jane connected her phone to the speakers while she and Joy were preparing the food. _''straight off the plane to a new hotel…'', _the song began. Joyleen literally stopped breathing for a few seconds. Her face was comical. _''…just touched down you could never tell…''. _And then she was screaming and jumping on both her feet.

''Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God'', she repeated over and over again. She was like those hysterical star-struck teenagers. Jane had not expected such a reaction and she had to laugh and the over-excited girl who was now repeating lyric for lyric.

''…_midnight memories..oh oh oh..baby you and me, stumbling the street, singin singin singin singin…'', _Jane couldn't help but sing along with Joyleen when it got to the chorus she knew. The younger girl took a nearby egg beater while Jane grabbed hold of a wooden spoon. Margo watched them from her seat as they sang loudly into each other's faces clearly competing for the 'loudest singer' title.

When Maura heard the rapidly increasing volume coming from downstairs she quickly made her way to check on the commotion. ''What are you doing?'', she yelled. No one had even noticed her presence, as Jane and Joyleen were jumping up and down singing like fools at a live show with Margo shaking her head at them. Realizing that she wasn't going to be heard, she briskly made it to the speakers and pressed pause.

''Heeeeey'', came a chorused complain from two stars that had their fake microphone's against their lips.

''Are you trying to make yourselves deaf?'', Maura looked at them sternly.

''Come on. We were getting to the good part'', Jane said with disregard to Maura's concern.

''Well at _this _volume, it may be the last 'good' thing that you hear'', she turned to Joyleen seeing that she obviously wasn't going to get through to her girlfriend. ''Honey, such loud volume can do serious damage to your hearing in the long run''

''Sorry, we'll turn it down'', the girl said guiltily.

Jane sighed exaggeratedly, looking at the clock on the wall, ''What time are you leaving again?''

''Jane'', Maura admonished.

''I'm kidding, come here'', Jane pulled her into a placating hug. When she pulled away she put the volume considerably low and searched for another song on her phone.

''_your hand fits in mine like its made just for me…'', _the song began.

''This is Maura's favourite'', Jane told Joyleen who was looking on in great wonder.

''I didn't even _know _you listened to **One Direction.** They are my absolute favourite'', she put her hand against her heart for emphasis. ''and I love this song too, even though I can't dance to it''

''It's beautiful'', Maura turned the volume up by two more units, forgetting her earlier rant about ear-damage. Jane winked at Joyleen and they both laughed. ''What?'', the blonde asked them.

''I believe you said something about hearing loss'', Jane smirked.

''Yes…well…'', Maura stammered. ''This song doesn't have all those loud drums'', she finished lamely.

...

They went through making breakfast and eating it while listening to several different songs. Joyleen told them about all the other songs that were popular in France and even though they were French, Jane enjoyed some of them. It was perfect level ground, because Margo loved music too. So they managed to go through the morning amicably, even stating that Joyleen got her interest for music from Margo's genes.

After cleaning up, it was time for Maura to leave – to everyone's disappointment. She was the glue that held them together, and truth be told, they were all a bit edgy about being left in her absence. ''You'll call if you need anything right?'', Maura asked the detective. Jane was walking Maura to her car, something they _never _did. It felt awkward, even to them.

''Yeah, I will''. The tall woman opened the door for her girlfriend and then crouched down leaning her arm against the top of the car, so she look at Maura properly.

''You seem nervous Jane''. It wasn't a question.

''I am'', Jane breathed in deeply. ''I don't wanna have Sunday dinner here, _today. _I wish we had cancelled it''.

''We'll manage Jane, we always do''. Jane gazed longingly at her girlfriend, admiring all those little things she loved about her. ''I'll see you later?'', Maura tried to get Jane's attention.

''Yeah'', the brunette jerked from her trance. ''I love you'', she kissed Maura and the blonde drove away.

* * *

''So, remind me who's coming again'', Joyleen asked for what Jane thought was the fourth time that afternoon.

''My mother'', Jane began patiently counting off everyone on her fingers, ''Frankie and Tommy, my brothers. And Tommy's wife Lydia, and their son TJ. And two of our friends from work, Frost and Korsak''

''I don't understand why Maura's family isn't coming still'', Joyleen asked, puzzled. She'd asked the question about Maura's family earlier on and Jane had brushed her off easily. Now it was being asked again.

''You know what kid'', Jane crossed her fingers hoping she wouldn't say the wrong thing. ''Tonight, when everyone else goes home, we'll have a talk – me, you and Maura. And you'll be allowed to ask anything about her family, and we'll tell you. Deal?''

''Why don't you just tell me now?'', the persistent girl asked.

''Because its _Maura's _family, so she should be here for that''

''That doesn't make sense. It's just telling me if she has a brother or sister and what their names are and what they do. Those are just facts, so anyone can say it. I already talked to her mother Constance anyway''

''Sweetie'', Jane smiled at her, ''It's not that simple, trust me. Just be patient till night time okay''

''Fine'', she eventually relented.

* * *

Angela, as always, came barreling through the back door at exactly 3pm. ''JANIE!'', she yelled. ''I'm so sorry I'm late'', she went on even though no one was present. She probably knew her volume was loud enough for anyone to hear regardless of which part of the house they were in.

Margo, as usual, had said she needed to work and was using Maura's office. Jane and Joyleen were in the girl's room upstairs. Joyleen had been showing Jane pictures on her laptop of her friends and her grandparents. The young girl had so many stories to tell about her life in France and school. Jane had then helped her unpack a few of the other things she hadn't yet put away. Joyleen enjoyed hearing stories about Jane's upbringing, and about the detective's friendship with her 'mother'. They talked at great length, sharing many stories about their various interests, and Jane offering some insight on what American school would be like for the new resident. All that was put to a stop of course, the moment Angela arrived in all her loud glory.

''_That, _is my mother'', Jane cringed. ''Come on''. She and Joyleen went to meet the matriarch.

Angela had been in the house for not more than five minutes but the kitchen had transformed already. All the different types of Italian ingredients had been laid on the counter tops, as well as pots and pans.

''Hey Ma'', Jane greeted, Joyleen in tow.

When Angela turned around, it was to see her daughter with a beautiful young girl joined to her hip. ''Oh sweetheart'', Angela squealed, ''This must be Joyleen'', she walked over to the girl who was suddenly looking shy and pushing herself a little further into Jane.

''Yeah'', Jane proudly nudged Joyleen into clear view.

''You're so beautiful'', Angela stretched out her arm for a greeting. ''I'm Angela''

''Hello'', Joyleen returned the gesture.

''Oh just come here'', the elder woman couldn't help but pull her into a hug. Jane smiled at them in adoration. She kind of wished she had a child in that moment, seeing the glimmer in her mother's eyes.

''Has Jane been treating you alright?'', the girl was now held at arm's length by the shoulders.

''She's the best'', Joyleen gushed immediately. Its not like there was any other way to put it.

''I'm so glad honey. Come here, tell me all about yourself'', Angela dragged her into the kitchen. Jane just followed, knowing it was a matter of time before she'd have to rescue the poor child.

* * *

Making decisions came easily to Margo. She was a very intelligent woman in her own regard. The decision she had to make today wasn't an ordinary one. This was one of those do or die sort of decisions. She'd only ever had to make that decision twice in her life before. First it was when she fell pregnant. Keeping the baby, or not. It was a decision heavily influenced by Maura, but she could easily have done what she pleased. The second time, and what she had hoped would be the last time, was after Maura fled from her life. Was she to keep Yolanda or give her away. Both these decisions where life changing ones, and she needed to make the right decision in both cases. Now she was faced with that same predicament once again. Should she take Yolanda back with her, or leave the child with Maura?

The circumstances were the same all these three times. It revolved around her, Maura and Yolanda. There was a difference however, Margo soon realized. The first time she was making this life altering decision, it was for the benefit of Maura. Do I keep the child for her? Or do I just forget and get rid of it. She didn't want it, and the child was barely there. So it was all about Maura. The second time, the decision was being made for her benefit. Should she give the child up for adoption and go on with her life? Maura wasn't in the picture, and Yolanda would be just fine. It was all about what she wanted. Not Maura, and not Yolanda.

But the choice she had to make now was all about Yolanda. Gone were the days when it was about Maura, or her. Now it was about this new life. Should she leave Yolanda with Maura, or take her back to France? She didn't have the time or the will to play full-time mom. And Maura had made it clear that her life wouldn't come to a halt without Yolanda. So the person who had to be considered here was only the innocent child. Take her or leave here? The dilemma was whether or not she was ready and willing to give up all her rights to Yolanda. Signing off the papers like Maura said, meant she'd wipe away any right she had to her daughter. Did she want that? It's not like it really made a difference, Yolanda was raised by her mother anyway. But she still had the option then. Now it wouldn't be there anymore.

She hated these kinds of decisions - they were so final. Everything else in her life worked easily. She was good at her job and always made the right calls. Her love life was okay, despite the fact that she was still in love with Maura , who was totally in love with Jane. But Margo was beautiful, and had zero trouble getting a girlfriend. But this whole motherhood business is what had made her a failure, and she hated Yolanda for it – even though she knew it was just plain stupid.

So Margo sat in Maura's office that afternoon, analyzing her two previous big decisions. The first one was a wrong move, she convinced herself. She had lost Maura, and she never had Yolanda. If she had just had an abortion, she wouldn't be dealing with all of this today. And the second decision, wrong again. If she had just given Yolanda to a couple that wanted her, things would have worked out just fine. But she listened to her mother, and here she was now. She had been swayed by Maura to keep the child. Then swayed by her mother to let her raise Yolanda. Now her mother was dead, and Maura was with Jane. She'd been deceived, and made to feel like a failure by the two people she loved the most in the world. It angered her, and pained her at the same time.

But sitting behind Maura's large wooden desk on a comfortable chair, Margo looked at the picture of Jane and Maura that sat on a frame in front of her and made her decision as an epiphany overwhelmed her.

* * *

**AN: I am working on starting to post pictures on Tumblr that go with some things mentioned in the story. Like pictures of Jane's ring, and of Joyleen and her guinea pig and so on and so forth. Will let you know when they are up. Thanks again you guys **


	23. Dinner, kisses, love

**AN: Please don't be mad. We find out Margo's decision in the chapter.**

* * *

Dinner was loud. There wasn't a single fraction of a second in which someone didn't have their mouth open.

''So, are you seeing anyone honey?'', Angela spoke in an overly polite tone to Margo. She hadn't liked the woman the second she laid her eyes on her. And her intention ever since was to make it clear that Jane and Maura were an item and there was no room for her – not even for a friendship with Maura.

''Nothing serious'', she offered.

''But there _is _someone?'', Angela pushed forth. Jane hadn't asked about that, not to say she didn't want to know. And though she'd normal stop her mother whenever she got all close and person with people, she didn't interject this time – she wanted to hear.

''Yes'', came a chipped reply. Tommy and Lydia were fussing over TJ who was starting to crawl and couldn't stay in one place for a whole minute. The rest of the guys were invested in the conversation. Korsak, Frankie and Frost's loyalty lay with Jane. And from the bits and pieces of information they had heard and what they were gathering tonight, they weren't too fond of Margo either. They didn't have anything personal against her, they just simply shipped Rizzoli and Isles that's all.

''Well that's good then. You two must be very happy, I know my girls here are'', Angela gave the dark blonde a knowing look. The guys were still getting used to Jane and Maura as a couple, hell, _Jane and Maura _were still getting used to themselves as a couple. The two had found it best to sit separate from each other, just to lay low with the PDA for a little while. And of course Joyleen had happily placed herself in between the two at the table.

The young girl had easily charmed herself into the hearts of everyone she met that evening. At first she had been shy and stayed close to Jane or Maura at all times, but that faded away quickly. Everyone was warm and caring towards her. They all paid attention to her, asking questions and including in her all their conversation. She wasn't an attention seeker per se, but just like anyone else, the girl loved to be included. And the Rizzoli's sure knew all about inclusion. Despite the fact that the eldest one took it to the next step.

Joyleen fit in just fine with her new family. She loved to eat, and boy was there lots of food. She tried everything, while Maura continuously warned her about over indulging and mixing foods. She just smiled and plowed on.

TJ took an instant liking to the new addition as well. Even though he wasn't normally a choosy baby, he cried around new company often times. But when Joyleen held him, and watched her guinea pig Buddy running around in his cage with TJ in her arms, the little boy officially welcomed her into the family by shedding no tears.

Margo found it interesting and a little uncivilized. She wondered how Maura had blended in with these people. They were so...different. She wouldn't admit it, but she was endeared by the way she watched Maura sprouting off her science fun facts which nobody understood, but they still humoured her or brushed her off lovingly. Everything going on was done with so much love and consideration for one another. They each made fun of the other, laughed it off, and hugged it away. She found it different, and nice, but certainly not a way she'd like to live everyday herself.

''Do you cook dear?'', Angela interrogated again.

''Not often, I'm no good really'', Margo laughed it off. She never really had the time. One of the traits she looked for in girlfriends were women who loved to cook, because she couldn't.

''Well, while you're here I could teach you a thing or two'', Angela smiled genuinely. She loved to help, and anything involving the kitchen was a massive bonus. But she'd obliviously hit a nerve. The staying situation was still up in the air, and Maura hadn't told Angela about the ultimatum she gave Margo.

Across the table, Margo looked at Maura, and then directed her gaze to Jane before answering Angela with a small, ''We'll see''. All that eye blazing wasn't lost on Angela. The woman immediately knew something was up. She intended to badger her daughter about how the living situation was going when she arrived earlier, but with Joyleen's bountiful energy and general presence, she didn't get a chance to question her daughter – to Jane's great pleasure. But now she was sure she was going to find the few minutes to corner either Jane or Maura before she left. Angela just liked knowing things in general. That's where she normally butted heads with her daughter who didn't favour overly sharing information – unless it was work related of course.

So that's how dinner ended that night – peacefully. Jane wanted to document the event and put it in the Guinness book of world records. It was definitely a wow moment. Margo, Angela, and Tommy had ALL behaved themselves. It was epic, she didn't even know who to thank.

Everyone was gone by 9pm, with the house moderately cleaned. Maura was going to call in her cleaner to come in the next morning to do a thorough job, TJ had left quite an impact.

* * *

''Well, that was…nice. You have an interesting family Jane'', Margo commented when Jane was pouring them a glass of wine. Maura and Joyleen were refilling the food and water in the guinea pig cage, and had to feet Bass and Jo as well. They were on 'animal duty' as Joyleen had so gleefully put it. The youngster had suggested that they'd take turns each night – one of the adults with her, like that.

''Thanks'', Jane said unsurely. ''I think'', came the added after thought.

''It's not a bad thing Jane'', Margo smiled.

''It's just the way you say it, its kinda hard to tell'', Jane passed a full glass to the woman who just shrugged at Jane's response.

''How come your father didn't join us?'', Margo asked curiously.

''My parents aren't together anymore'', Jane replied immediately and dismissively.

''Sorry''. Margo had the decency not to ask any further questions.

When Maura and Joyleen returned, the girl got herself a glass of milk while the women enjoyed their wine. They talked a bit about art, and Maura shared with Margo the story about when Jane had gone to her mother's art installation and found absolutely no joy in it. Joyleen liked to write short stories and poetry, and took the time to read out a few of her writings to the three women.

...

''Come on, come on, I have one more'', Joyleen begged.

''I have to work on something before bed'', Margo announced. Not that it was anything new.

''You can read the last one to me Joy'', Jane pitied the kid.

''What time do you plan on leaving tomorrow?'', Margo asked Maura.

''Our appointment is at nine. So an ideal time would be 8:15''

''Okay. Goodnight then''

Joyleen gave her a hug and a kiss, ''Night Yolanda'', and she was gone.

...

Joyleen held her book in her hand and cleared her throat theatrically before reading out her poem

''_I hate toast_

_Even though I can roast_

_I don't boast_

_I'm in a new era_

_All things clearer_

_Feel like I'm getting nearer_

_So the other day I got a kiss_

_I was in a serious state of bliss_

_All that I now miss_

_My emotions are always in a rush_

_It's safe to call it a crush_

_Who knows, maybe even lust_

_This all seems outta range_

_Well even a little bit strange_

_Rest assured, I am not deranged''_

Jane and Maura were silent for a significantly long time after the poem ended. ''So what did you think?'', the girl enthused. Jane scratched the back of her neck, she wasn't sure what to say.

''Come and sit here for a little while'', Maura began slowly. Joyleen obeyed cautiously, unclear of what was wrong. ''Have you ever…uhhhhh…kissed anyone before?'', came the question from Maura.

Jane wasn't amazed, Maura was one to get right to it without beating about the bush. Joyleen appeared to seriously think about the question, not entirely following on what Maura was getting at. The doctor realized this and specified further, ''Have you ever kissed, or been kissed by a boy…from, uhhh, school or some place like that''

Realization dawned, and Joyleen blushed furiously. Jane's eyes almost fell out of their sockets, but Maura was strangely calm about the whole thing.

''It's okay honey. You can talk to us'', she looked pointedly at Jane who was ready to bolt any second, ''about anything, don't be shy. You know when I was young like you I had so many questions but I didn't have anyone to ask. I had to read a lot from books, but it helps to speak to someone else. Someone with experience who-''

Jane cleared her throat loudly, indicating to Maura that she'd said enough and needed to give the child room to at least answer her first question. ''Right…'', Maura blushed too. ''Have you kissed anyone?'', the question came out more clearly now.

''Yes'', the girl averted her eyes, clutching her book tightly to her chest.

Jane choked on her wine, but she was scared to cough because the girl might get frightened and not share her story. She clumsily wiped the drops of wine and the tears from her eyes from trying to hold in the cough.

''Would you like to tell us about it?'', Maura asked patiently.

Joyleen thought again for a short time. ''It was only once, just before I came here''

''And who was this boy?'', Maura smiled encouragingly at the shy girl.

''He…uhhhh'', she gulped, ''He…I mean _I _had a crush on him. And he liked me too I guess. So when I had a good-bye party he gave me a gift and kissed me good-bye…..on the mouth'', she added.

Maura exhaled, glad it was just a one-time innocent encounter. Jane was as quiet as a church mouse, having absolutely nothing to contribute to the discussion at hand.

''Do you understand why I am asking all these questions honey?'', Maura got a little bit serious.

''Because I said kiss in my poem'', came the immediate reply.

''Not only that. You mentioned a few….mature sentences Joyleen. And I'm just surprised as to where you got that from''

''I don't know'', she answered honestly. ''I just wrote down what came to my mind and it all seemed to rhyme''

''Do you want to tell me more about the kiss?''. Maura went on. Jane gave her the 'please drop it already' look, but the blonde was undeterred.

''I think it was just a normal kiss'', its not like the girl had anything to compare it to.

''Okay'', now that Maura had exhausted her more pressing questions, she was at a loss.

''Well….'', Jane piped in enthusiastically, more than happy to put a stop to the whole kissing conversation. ''If you had a crush on anyone again, and you want to talk more about kissing and all, we're her to help okay?''

''Yeah'', she smiled gratefully at Jane. Turns out _she _wanted an out too.

''One other thing'', Maura stopped her before she stood up. Jane bowed her head shaking it and whispering an 'Oh God'. ''Do you…uhhh, need a cellphone?''

It was like Joyleen had been told Christmas was going to be happening every day for the whole year. ''Oh my God, yes. Yes, yes, yes'', she had to get on her two feet to show how much of a yes it was. Jane just smiled knowingly at her girlfriend.

''Well then, we can sort that out tomorrow''

''You're awesome!'', she planted a huge moist kiss to Maura's cheek. ''She's great'', she said to Jane, pointing at Maura.

''I only date 'the great''', Jane feigned posh-ness.

….

''Wait a minute'', Joyleen paused the television program. ''Jane said when you get back you'd tell me about your family'', she looked to Maura.

Great! Just what the doctor had been avoiding. She couldn't put it off forever though. Joyleen deserved to know.

''Right'', Maura rubbed her palms against her thighs trying to decipher where the best starting point would be. Joyleen pushed herself further into the couch, like she was about to hear a juicy story of some kind. Maura tucked one leg under the other, and turned so could face the girl. ''I was adopted'', she revealed the first truth.

''You were?'', the kid asked, clearly surprised.

''So I have two mothers, just like you. There is Constance who raised me. And Hope is the one who gave birth to me''

''So did you see hope when you were older, like how I met you now?'', Joyleen crossed her legs and rested her head against Jane's arm.

''In a way, yes. I always knew I was adopted but I didn't know who my birth mother was. I only met her last year''

''That's recent''

''Yes. She was living in England before. And I also learned I have a half-sister. Her name is Cailin and she's nineteen''

''Cool'', the girl perked up significantly. For whatever reason, that tid-bit of information elated her.

''Well I guess you could say its 'cool'. Me and her are still trying to…connect. You will meet her soon, she comes around some times''

''Is she nice, like Jane's brothers''

''No one is quite like Jane's brothers honey'', Maura laughed. ''she is nice in her own way. You'll see her''

''And your other mom too?''

''Yes. You'll meet them both''

Maura didn't mention Colin. There really was no need to burden the child with that information. It's not like it would make any sort of difference – the guy was dead, and she'd known nothing about him (didn't even know OF him) prior to the incident. Maura was also skirting around the issue of her father, Doyle. There was really no tender way to put that into words. And if the girl didn't ask, she sure as hell wasn't going to offer the information.

No such luck.

''What about your real father?'', she asked quietly. Maura's eyes immediately sought Jane's, a silent request for help.

''You know how people do some bad things and they have to go to prison?'', Jane said.

''Yes'', came the answer accompanied by a nod.

''Well, Maura's real father did something bad so he had to be put into prison''

''What did he do?'', the curious mind wondered.

''We aren't allowed to tell people about it'', Jane whispered. ''It's against the law''

''Will he come out?''

''We aren't sure yet. But you shouldn't worry too much about it okay. He isn't part of our lives'', Jane left it at that.

Joyleen appeared deep in thought for a while after Jane's last words.

''What is it honey?'', Maura asked her.

''Can I ask you something?'', she tilted her head up to Jane.

''Of course kid, anything''

''Why….why wasn't your father here tonight?''

There it was. Boy did they all have 'daddy issues'.

Jane sighed, not having prepared herself for this. And just like Maura had done before, she looked to the blonde for support.

''Jane's father doesn't live in Boston anymore'', Maura though that would appease the girl. It didn't.

''Why?''

''Because…'', she silently asked Jane if it was okay to share, and Jane nodded imperceptibly. ''because he and Jane's mother aren't married anymore''

Joyleen nodded, thinking deeply again. She knew what she was thinking and what she wanted to say, but it seemed the English words weren't coming too easily now.

''You are thinking very hard sweetie, what is it'', Maura took her small hand and entwined their fingers. Jane almost cried. She'd never seen Maura initiate that kind of intimate contact with anyone other than her before. It was so sweet.

''I was just wondering why all'', she waved her other hand around the three of them, ''our fathers aren't around that's all''. Jane couldn't hold in her humourless chuckle. It was a fair assessment. Why weren't they around? Were they - her, Maura and Joyleen - THAT bad? She didn't understand.

''I don't know honey'', Maura answered truthfully. ''but what I do know is that it has nothing to do with us. All three of us don't have our fathers in our lives, but guess what. We have many mothers – Constance, Hope, Angela. And you have me and Jane, and Margo. And the most important thing is that we have each other. We'll be alright''. Maura pulled her small hand up for a long kiss.

''I love you'', Maura told Joyleen, caressing the young girl's soft cheek and peering into blue eyes. ''I love you very much'', and she took that same hand and repeated the same action to Jane's cheek, ''and you too my love''

* * *

**Disclaimer: The poem above belongs to me.**

* * *

**AN: I hope I didn't disappoint you guys. I decided to make the dinner anti-climatic, I'm working on a few things regarding the direction of this so I didn't want those problems. **


	24. Her decision

**I watched the last episode of Season 1 again today. I wasn't watching Rizzoli and Isles back then. I just wanted to commend people who were for their strength, I don't know how I would have survived the waiting period until season 2 – you guys are heroes!**

* * *

**AN: Warning…sex!**

* * *

Jane and Maura were in bed, settled in for the night. ''You know, it seems like after every other day a new piece of information is revealed. Sometimes I wonder if I will cope'', Maura whispered as if there were someone in the room other than Jane who would hear her.

''What do'you mean?'', Jane pulled Maura even closer to her.

''Like tonight, I realized something else I hadn't even considered''

''You're talking about Joyleen aren't you?'', Jane finally caught on.

''Yes'', Maura sighed. ''The issue about her growing up hadn't yet occurred to me. Now I learn she's been kissed. Its only a few months before she's officially a teenager. Remember when Cailin came to stay here when Hope wasn't around. I very nearly ruined a relationship we hardly even had. I can only imagine what it will be like with Joyleen''

''I thought you said we'll be alright earlier on''

''Yes, but I hadn't had an in-depth conversation with myself at that time''

Jane smiled and kissed her girlfriend at the back of her neck. ''that's what the Sunday sessions are for right'', Jane continued caressing the pale neck with her lips.

''I don't know for certain if I will get all the knowledge I need from there. But it's a starting point I guess'', the last of Maura's words came out more as a moan. Jane's hand had now migrated to her breasts and was massaging it tenderly. ''Jane'', Maura breathed.

The detective knew Maura had so much on her mind, and if she could alleviate those concerns for just a short while she'd do whatever she could. As it was, nothing she could say could make Maura instantly better. But maybe her actions would just carry some weight until the blonde came down from the throes of her physical release.

Jane had memorised the spot on Maura's neck that made her lose her defences, so she attacked that first. ''Jane, not tonight'', Maura tried pushing away from Jane who was spooning her when she realized the kisses were no longer innocent.

''Ssshhh'', the brunette held Maura's heavy breast in her hand firmly, applying more pressure to her kneading. Her kisses involved a little teeth grazing now, as she licked and sucked various parts of the small portion of Maura's neck she had access to. Her one leg slipped in between Maura's from behind, hitting hard against the blonde's sex immediately.

''Ahhh'', she moaned despite herself. ''Jaaaane'', she tried to complain again, though her voice said something completely different.

''Don't stop me'', Jane rasped into her hair, breathing in Maura's familiar scent.

''Not now'', she tried with an even weaker voice.

''I want you Maur. I want to feel you cum against my fingers''

''Jaaaane''. That was an encouragement now.

Jane sucked harder onto her neck, lifting herself up a little so she could access the side. Her thigh ground into Maura harder, as she massaged more and more.

''I love to know I'm responsible for those moans. You don't know what it does to me, knowing that I make you so wet. Knowing that I can make you see stars from just using my fingers''

''Jane….ahhh'', she moaned again.

''I never used to like my fingers you know'', Jane pulled Maura's nightie up, ''till the day I pushed them into your wet pussy''

Maura moaned loudly when Jane did just what she had described. And for sure, Maura was wet. Jane's long fingers slipped up and down moist folds, rubbing until she should feel them swell.

''I look at my fingers in a different way now''

''You do?'', Maura asked softly.

''I love them now'', Jane smiled against Maura's neck finally pushing two digits inside Maura. The blonde moaned again. ''my fingers can feel this'', she curled them inside Maura, eliciting another moan from her girlfriend. She pumped further and harder into Maura, using her thigh to push deeper. She then pushed her other hand under Maura so it could grab the other un-touched breast.

''Jane…''

''Yes baby'', Jane panted from her efforts.

''I…I love you'', and with that declaration Jane began to feel Maura's walls tighten. The vibrations from Maura's body could be felt by Jane, as the blonde's orgasm drew closer and closer. ''Oh Jane…right…right there'' ,Maura instructed when Jane used her thumb to rub on a taut clit. And Jane didn't stop, as she felt her girlfriend drowning in a wave of pleasure. ''Jaaane…'', the name came out as a strangled cry while Maura rode her orgasm to its end.

When Jane was sure the dark spots had cleared from Maura's vision, she slipped her fingers out. With her other arm, she turned Maura over so they could face each other. And when they locked eyes, Jane pulled her two moist fingers into her mouth – sucking and licking all that was Maura's on them. The blonde watched in awe as Jane moaned against her own fingers from tasting her cum. And before she knew it, she was being pulled into a violent and all-consuming kiss. Her taste on Jane's tongue was like the perfect cocktail mix. It left her drunk with desire.

Somehow, sex was just what she need that night. All anxiety and stress left her instantly. Feeling lightheaded from pleasure, and as if the weight on her shoulders had been lifted away, she drifted off into sleep happy and content.

* * *

Last nights 'fuck destruction' had worked marvellously. But it was now Monday morning, and Maura was a teary mess. All that talk about 'you can leave with Joyleen if you don't want to agree to my terms and conditions' proved to be painful now. Maura was the picture of a 'hot mess'.Jane didn't know how to help. She wanted to run, but she knew no matter how fast she went, she'd still be caught – her fate was decided. There was not a damn thing she could do, Maura was inconsolable.

''She's going to take her'', Maura sobbed into the drying towel in her hand.

''You don't know that Maur'', Jane's heart continued to break piece by piece. She knew by the time she walked out of the house they'd be nothing left of it – if she eventually managed it. As it was, she was seriously considering calling in. _Why hadn't I taken the day off in the first place?, _she berated herself. _''I know, none of this had been planned. I was supposed to be giving Maura time with Joyleen. Not leaving her to wonder if the daughter that just came into her life was going to be snatched away''_

''She hasn't said anything about it Jane'', Maura took the detective out of her inner monologue.

''Baby, get dressed up please. You're going to be late. Maybe I can go and talk to h-''

''No!'', Maura almost jumped up. ''Sorry. I just….'', another sob came out. ''I just don't want you guys to end up fighting. Things were getting a bit better and…'', the sentence died in her cries. Jane made a decision in her head that very second. But for now, all she could do was hold her lover while she cried her heart out.

It's an agonizing thing, when the only person who can stop you from crying is the one that made you cry. Jane was partly furious, because she _knew _the only person who could made Maura feel better was Margo. And that was a sickening pill to swallow for the detective.

It was about twenty minutes later, when Maura marginally pulled herself together. With puffy eyes and a red face, she began to dress up.

* * *

''I repeat, CALL ME'', Jane said once again. ''For anything, anytime, however many times you want to call''

''Okay'', came the shallow reply.

''It doesn't seem like it now, and I may not be the best person to be saying this. But it will be okay'', Jane looked pitifully and lovingly at her love, the broken woman before her that she couldn't help. She was now feeling guilty. Had it not been for Maura's love for her, the blonde wouldn't be going through all this pain. It was just a really fucked up situation. ''I'll see you later?''

''Yes. Thank you Jane''. The brunette pulled her into a tight embrace and exited their bedroom after leaving a kiss to Maura's unresponsive lips.

Jane headed straight for Margo's room and knocked loudly. ''Come in''. Margo was already dressed and about to go out and have some breakfast.

The door opened roughly and revealed a VERY serious looking Jane. ''I hope you fix the mess you made _before _I get back''. And as fast as she came in, she was gone. Margo just stared at the ajar door for a few moments before heading into Joyleen's room.

''Morning mommy'', the girl kissed her mother.

''Good morning Yolanda. Sleep well?''

''Always'', she smiled. She wasn't getting dressed just yet. Angela was due to arrive any minute and was spending the morning with Joyleen till Margo and Maura returned from their meeting.

''I…I wanted you to have this'', Margo handed her a sealed envelope.

''What is it?'', she was about to open it. Margo stopped her immediately.

''You can read that tonight okay, promise?''

''Alright'', Joyleen had always been an obedient child.

''Let's go and make breakfast''

The two went downstairs and began making breakfast, which was basically just cereal since Margo didn't like cooking. Maura joined then five minutes later, looking visibly distraught but trying hard to pull herself together.

''Maura'', Joyleen jumped off the kitchen stool to hug her. Maura wasn't sure how long she could hold her resolve if she stayed in the house any longer.

''Is Angela here?'', the blonde couldn't even remember to offer a simple 'good morning'. There was certainly nothing good about hers.

''Not yet'', Margo eyed her suspiciously.

Before anything else could be said, they were graced with Angela's presence. ''Angela'', the girl directed her affection to the elder woman with whom she had gotten along with so well.

''Hello my darling. You seem nice and lively this morning''

''I am'', the girl did a little shoulder shimmy. Maura didn't dare even look at her that morning, she simply couldn't. The prospect of losing her hurt too much. It was slowly starting to manifest itself physically.

''We are going to get going now'', she said to Angela without so much as a good morning.

''Honey, are you alright?'', Angela worried. One look at Maura had told her there was serious thunder in paradise.

''No Angela. But don't worry yourself, there isn't anything you can do. Margo'', she beckoned the woman to follow.

''We'll be back before one'', Margo was the one to tell Angela. Maura was already out of the house.

''What's wrong with Maura?'', Joyleen asked, her blue eyes looking as worried as ever.

''She'll be alright sweetheart'', Margo assured her. ''We'll see you later okay''

''Bye'', she said sadly.

….

''Maura, can we please stop for coffee somewhere for just half an hour'', Margo said buckling her seatbelt. ''We are early''

Maura didn't answer but showed that she heard and was on board. They drove in utter silence, until Maura pulled into a parking spot at a coffee shop ten minutes later.

''Small tea with nothing in it'', Maura ordered.

''I'll have the same'', Margo told the waitress. ''Maura, will you please look at me'', she asked the blonde.

And the waterworks began. It now felt so real and so final – the cruelty of life. Bringing someone into your life so you can love them and then have them ripped away so soon. ''I wish you would just let me talk to you'', Margo said as she joined Maura on her side of booth and gathered her in her arms for a hug.

''I just…'', the sentence never saw it's end through Maura's tears.

''I'm not taking her'', Margo put Maura out of her misery. Maura stopped breathing for a few beats. ''I'm not taking her'', the dark blonde repeated. And finally Maura looked up at her. ''I'm sorry that I made you so distressed Maura, that was never my intention. You need to understand that I also had to think about it'', Maura only nodded. ''I'm leaving tonight, and she'll be all yours''

Their teas came, and the waitress gave them a weary look before walking away. ''Do you mean that Margo?'', Maura tried to ascertain the truth before jumping for joy.

''I care about her, and I know I can't give her what you can. She's my daughter Maura, and I trust that you will do everything for her?''

''You don't have to ask me that Margo, you know I will'', Maura wiped her eyes. Margo pulled her into another hug, relishing the last moments she had with the woman she loved.

After their tea, they drove over to Maura's lawyer for the paper work signing. ''So what are your plans in terms of visitation. Is that going to be left up to the child?'', the man asked the two women.

''No'', Margo answered, and Maura's heart did a little frightened flip. _Oh God, the mantra went on in her mind. _She hadn't texted Jane anything yet, too afraid that Margo would change her mind at any point. ''That won't be necessary. I'll signing off all rights to Maura and leaving their life. I won't be visiting, and they won't be visiting''

''Are you sure?'', the man asked.

''Positive''

So all the paperwork was signed. And it would take twenty-four hours to process before Maura became the one and only parent of Joyleen. At that point, the child would get a new birth certificate, and would officially become an Isles.

* * *

Jane didn't see it coming. She was busy taking crap from the guys about the ring on her finger. When she'd decided she would never take it off – which was the second Maura had put it on her finger – she had convinced herself that people wouldn't notice. What she forgot was that she worked with detectives. Her partners had noticed the small piece of jewellery the second she sat on her chair and covered her face with her hands – like she always did when she was frustrated.

The torment was starting to die down, and she was tapping her foot on the floor when a body practically landed on her. Normally she would have heard Maura's heels from a distance, but it must have been the frustration that hindered her. Or the simple fact that Maura had literally ran into the bullpen.

''Maura'', Jane quickly held Maura so she wouldn't fall. The blonde was half lying horizontally on Jane's lap.

''Oh Jane'', she wrapped her arms around the detectives neck. ''She's not taking her…'', Maura cried tears of joy. ''I'm really going to be a mother''. Jane finally caught on, and wrapped her hands around Maura's mid-section, turning the chair they were sitting on around.

Forget that her partners were watching them, or a few other people in the vicinity. If anyone had questions before, they were answered. Because Maura pulled Jane into a searing kiss, completely disregarding workplace etiquette or the curious eyes. Jane - for all her prudishness - let Maura consume her right there, melting wholly into the tongue battle.

''You and I are going to be parents'', Maura whispered against Jane's lips.

''If this is the sort of celebration that comes with it, I think I may want more than one''

And then finally they began to notice everyone around them. Jane thought she'd die of embarrassment. But when she looked into the eyes of the woman on her lap, she knew she'd happily embarrass herself every day for the rest of her life if she got to see that smile on Maura's face.

''Hello'', she greeted Frost and Korsak, making no move to get out of Jane's lap.

''Well hello Doctor Isles'', Frost greeted in a teasing manner. ''I assume you're having a wonderful day''

''I can honestly say that today is one of the best days of my life'', Maura gushed, swinging her legs in Jane lap as if she were a little girl.

''Care to share the news'', Korsak asked.

''I am going to officially be Joyleen's mother

''That's great Doc. She's a real sweet kid'', the sergeant smiled at the blissful couple. He couldn't remember ever seeing the two that happy, it swelled his heart to know that after all they had been through they still had each other. And that they had finally got that all-encompassing type of all, and that they had found it with each other.

''I don't know how I am going to manage to work today Jane. I just want to scream''. Jane had never seen Maura like that – so over excited that she didn't know what to do with herself.

''Let me take you for coffee before you start'', she looked at her watch. ''You have about forty-five minutes till twelve. That's when your new assistant is getting her right?''

''Yes. Please, take me anywhere'', Maura leapt from Jane's lap with the widest smile Jane had ever seen.

''I'm gonna take her out real quick'', she said to her partners. ''I might have to tranquillize her'', she whispered to them before stepping out.

* * *

**I wrote this on my ohone cause my laptop is mising, its got many mistakes and i'm sorry, My other option was to wait till wednesday...i vouldnt do that to you  
**


	25. Emotional roller-coaster

**AN: I just wanted to send a special thank you to javalover27, your review really put a smile to my face. And not just her one, every single thing all of you have to say to me has been so sweet and kind and I really appreciate it. It makes writing this so much interesting, knowing you guys love it and are actually waiting for more and not telling me to piss off already. **

**This chapter is brought to you by an alcohol free weekend, its just late because typing on my phone sucks and I don't get my laptop till Wednesday. For those reading ALL OVER ME, next chapter will be posted tomorrow night. **

* * *

When Margo got home she packed her few belongings quickly. Her daughter was in the kitchen with Angela baking a shit storm of cookies. Unbeknownst to everyone, the woman have already purchased her ticket to Japan for that evening. She knew her job in Boston was done. She'd settled her child's future and there was no way she was going to stick around and watch Maura being in love with someone else. Her time was better suited doing what she loved - her job. And Kristine, the woman she was in an on-again off-again relationship with was begging for her attention - she might as well put it where it was needed. She called for a taxi to be around to pick her up in half an hour. She had given Yolanda a written goodbye, and - according to her - Jane didn't need a farewell. Bidding Maura goodbye was going to be too painful for her to do in person. When Maura left her twelve years ago she'd spent a long time after that mad at Maura. But then that anger turned into missing her and she had dealt with that by talking to Yolanda about her. She had herself convinced the love was gone, until she saw Maura again. She had to go away, and move on. Margo was a woman who knew what she wanted, but she wasn't desperate. She'd lowered herself already by begging Maura, so she now had to gather what was left of her dignity and leave.

She took a few minutes to write down some parting words for Maura and then began to make a move.

"Dear, we've just made som-", Angela stopped talking when she saw the luggage Margo was coming down with. "Are you leaving?", Angela's voice held all the shock in the world.

"Mommy, where're you going", Yolanda left the kitchen to meet her mother in the living area, Angela in tow.

"I'm just going to stay at a hotel that's all", she lied.

"Is everything alright?", Angela couldn't help herself. She'd called Jane to ask how it went with the lawyer right after Margo came in, but the brunette said they'd talk about it when she and Maura got back.

"Everything is fine. I'll see you later darling", Margo said to Yolanda.

Thinking all was well, Joyleen said okay and hugged her goodbye. "I love you", the elder woman whispered into her ear. Yolanda smiled and went back to the task she was engaged in prior to her mothers arrival.

"Goodbye Angela". And with that she wheeled her suitcase out, as Angela waved at her.

Meanwhile across town, a raven haired beauty and a deep dimpled blonde were having a mini intimate celebration.

The blonde had marginally settled from her high and was starting to take things seriously. Jane sat at the two person table patiently awaiting Maura. She'd gone out of her way to drive a few extra miles to a fancy ass cafe she knew Maura loved. And three minutes ago the blonde had left Jane saying she needed to take care of _something._

Maura returned just as Jane was beginning to get antsy. "Finished taking care of _business_? ", Jane mocked.

"Matter of fact I have", the blonde completely missed the sarcastic undertones.

It wasn't even a minute later when a gentleman walked over to them with a plate with a large slice of chocolate cake. When he sat the plate down, Jane was at a loss for words. It read, in strawberry syrup "**be a mum with me**". When the man sat the plate in the middle of the table, he put two forks beside it and left.

"I feel like I've done enough grand proposals for a lifetime", Maura spoke shyly. "I don't know if I can safely say this will be the last one though"

"Here I was now thinking I was going to be the one who gets to ask you to marry me", Jane joked.

"If you're not careful I might just beat you to that one too. I'm on a roll of late", Jane laughed out loud as Maura tried her hand at colloquialism.

"I'll be on the look out". Jane looked down and read the edible words that decorated the plate once more.

"I don't want you to wonder what your role in Joyleen's life is. And I don't want you to feel like an outsider with me and her", Maura blushed furiously, hoping her next words would be taken well. "You're my family Jane. My best friend, girlfriend, and everything else. Maybe I'm being presumptuous, or too foward, but I would like nothing more than to parent with you", Jane was still listening quietly. "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I want you to be as much of Joyleen's mother as I am - to make it official"

"Oh my God, you're serious?", Jane's eyes grew wide with excitement.

"I would never joke about something like this"

"Oh my God!", Jane exclaimed loudly. She got off her butt and lifted Maura off the ground into a hug. "We're gonna be parents", she told the few people sitting close by.

"Congratulations", came the responses from people around them. They all just figured Maura was pregnant and had just broke the news to Jane. Why would they have any reason to suspect that they were best friends recently turned lovers that were going to be parents to a twelve year old, previously abandoned daughter of an ex lover? They just looked like a normal happy lesbian couple. No one would have guessed that it was only four hours ago that the blonde had been shedding tears in fears that this child was going to be taken away by its birth mother.

* * *

Angela had been too preoccupied by Joyleen to have any extra time to nag her daughter, Jane couldn't have been more thankful. Maura had also been immensely busy with the new assistant who was starting. The blonde needed to show and teach her as much as she could in the few hours she had, her plan had been to take the day off tomorrow. Maura wanted to celebrate with Joyleen and she also needed to go and get the child a new birth certificate and all other things in between. All that didn't leave any time for work, so getting the whole day would be advisable.

...

Jane made it to the morgue by 4pm on the dot, she couldn't wait to go home. ''Hey Maur'', she walked into the doctors office and greeted her with a kiss.

''Oh good you're here. I was about to call you and ask when you'd be ready to go home''

''I'm ready now'', the brunette plopped herself ungracefully on top of Maura's desk.

''Let me just run a few things by Thelma and we'll be on our way''.

Maura's new assistant Thelma walked in right that moment. She was a younger blonde who looked as geeky and eager to learn as Maura most often looked when she was doing her science-y things. The older blonde left Thelma with precise instructions for the next whole day, and told her to call if she needed anything. As an after thought, Maura then introduced her assistant to her girlfriend.

''Oh that's alright Maur, its not like I matter or anything'', Jane gave her a fake hard time.

''Don't be silly Jane, you matter more than anything'', Maura gave her a peck to the lips, making the near-stranger in their company a little uncomfortable. ''I hope you manage well tomorrow, Jane and I have to get going now''

''I assure, I will be fine. Thank you Doctor Isles. And it was nice to meet you Detective Rizzoli'', she said nervously.

* * *

''Have you spoken to Angela? How is she getting on with Joyleen. I haven't heard from Margo since we parted this morning''. They were driving home in Jane's cruiser. Maura had given Margo her car to take it home after their meeting in the morning and she'd been given a ride to the precinct by her lawyer.

''I talked to Ma earlier on, she said they were alright'', Jane referred to the brief conversation she'd had with the elder woman hours ago.

...

When they got home, Joyleen rushed over to give them a hug. ''I missed you guys'', she told them.

Maura couldn't stop her heart from blowing up like an inflatable mattress. This sweet, innocent, young girl was her child. This girl who loved her and _missed _her when she was at work was now hers. The tears Maura cried where of joy, she wanted to lift Joyleen into the air and tell her that they were now a family, and that she'd move mountains for her - that she'd do anything within her capacity to make sure there was happiness in this girls life.

When they had left the office in the morning with Margo, Maura and her had agreed they'd sit Joyleen down and explain the changes in her life till she fully understood what was happening. Margo had already told Joyleen most of everything. What Joyleen now needed to be informed of was that, officially, only Maura was now her mother and not Margo anymore - and all the other things that came with that alteration.

''Oh you're here'', Angela bellowed. ''I was wondering when you'd get here, not that I'm complaining. Tommy and Lydia need me to stay with TJ because they are both working tonight''

''Well why didn't you just leave?'', Maura wondered.

''Mom left'', Joyleen stated.

''What do you mean 'left'?'', Maura asked with instant concern.

''Walk me out will you'', Angela grabbed Maura by the arm and headed towards the door with her. ''See you baby'', she kissed Jane goodbye on her way out. ''Bye Joy''

''Thank you Mrs Rizzoli'', Joyleen waved at the woman.

When they got out, Angela stopped and began to tell Maura how Margo had just emerged from upstairs with her bags and said she was checking into a hotel.

''But I don't understand, did she say which hotel?''

''No, she said she had spoken with you already. I had a feeling something was off but I didn't wanna pry Maura''

''I understand Angela, thank you. You should have called if you had prior arrangements. I would have come back home''

''Oh stop. That girl is a gift. I loved every second with her. Oh by the way'', she remembered. ''How did things go this morning''

The smile that graced Maura's face put everything Angela knew about smiling to shame. ''Margo signed off all parental rights to me'', Maura whispered. It still felt a little bit like a dream to her.

''She what?'', Angela couldn't believe her ears.

''She signed everything. Joyleen is mine now. I've never been so happy in so long Angela, I don't even know what to do''

Angela was quick to gather her into a hug. ''I'm so happy for you honey, you deserve it and so does that little girl''

''Thank you''. Maura debated whether to say more. It wasn't much of a debate really, its not like she could hold it in. ''I asked Jane to be Joyleen's mother too. I want us to do this together''

''Oh Maura'', Angela put her hand against her aging heart.

''She was more than happy to do it, which I presume makes you a grandmother the second time around''

''Oh Maura'', Angela practically lifted her off the ground. ''Can I go in and see her?'', Angela asked hurriedly, as if she hadn't been with the child all day.

''Could I possibly tell her about it first. Maybe, if its not too much, I was hoping we could all go out to dinner somewhere tomorrow to celebrate''

''That would be perfect'', Angela's eyes sparkled with joy.

''I'll call you in the morning and tell you what we decide on''

''Okay. And congratulations Maura. Tell Janie I'll congratulate her properly tomorrow''

''I will'', they shared one last hug before Angela left and Maura went back into the house.

Jane and Joyleen had been catching up on their respective days. The girl was asking Jane endless questions about her detective job and begging to be taken to the police station to look around.

''Does Ma know where Margo went?'', Jane asked as soon as Maura walked into the house.

''No. What did she say honey?'', Maura asked Joyleen.

''She just said she's going to stay at a hotel and that she'll see me later and then she left'', the child was starting to get worried and that wasn't Maura's intention.

''It's okay sweetheart'', she tried to assure the girl. ''I'll just...'', she didn't know.

''You don't have her number do you?'', Jane wondered.

''No. I never thought to ask for it. We were always together really, or she was always at home more or less''

''I'll check in her room and see if she left anything'', Jane headed upstairs. Naturally, there was no reason to be worried about a grown woman leaving the house. Its not like Margo was deaf or blind, or didn't speak English. The woman would be just fine. It was just that in light of recent events, her disappearance didn't seem as innocent and unsuspectful as it should.

This isn't what Maura had in mind for when she got home. She'd expected a talk and then have a mini celebration and possibly a night of intense love making. Searching all over Boston for an adult ex lover wasn't appealing in any way. She tried to distract Joyleen, and herself while Jane was upstairs with conversations about what the girl had spent the day doing with Angela. She didn't have to keep up that guise for too long, Jane returned fairly quickly with a straight A4 sized lined paper written on both sides.

''What's that?'', Maura immediately jumped for the paper, fearing the worst already.

''It's for you'', Jane handed it over. She'd only read the line that said Dear Maura. She wasn't going to disrespect her girlfriend by reading her letter before she did.

Maura walked away, leaving Jane and Joyleen as she paced the hall reading the letter

_Dear Maura_

_I want you to know how proud I am of you. When I first met you, you were only twenty-three and so closed up. You were so out of touch with the real world, hiding in your books and your room. But then I got to know you, and i learned how wonderful you were. And when we started dating, it was the best thing that could ever happen to me. I remember how my friends used to ask me what I saw in you. And if it was someone else dating you I would have asked the same. But I loved that people didn't understand, because I got to have you all to myself - as selfish as that sounds. _

_The best days of my life were the last seven months of my pregnancy. That's when I fell irreversibly in love with you. It was beyond me how you could manage to stick with me through my pains and mood swings, especially given that I had hurt you. And I made myself a promise, that I would never hurt you again and that I'd be by your side whenever you needed me. I promised myself that once our child was born I would make up for wrongs I'd done, and properly thank you for taking care of me when I needed you the most. _

_But you never gave me that chance Maura. You just disappeared, after I had fallen helplessly in love with you. Not to say I didn't love you the years before, it was just a whole different kind of love - like getting to the next stage of something. And so I spent the past twelve years trying to get over you. And it would work until I went to see Yolanda and my heart would break all over again. That's why it was so impossible to truly love her. I hope your memory of me isn't such a bad one, because I will always remember you with so much love. _

_Again, I'm so proud of you. I worried about you back then you know. I wondered if you'd ever mature socially, or if you'd ever integrate into life like everyone else. But I see you now, and my heart swells. You've done so well for yourself, socially and career wise. You're much stronger now, you can stand up for yourself - you can even stand up to me. And that makes me so happy. But you__ have also remained the same amazing person you always were. _

_Contact me via email, only if there is something extremely important that I should know. This will obviously be only in the event of an unfortunate occurrence, so I really hope that I don't ever have to hear from you again. Yolanda has my email, and I told her to only contact me if it was important as well. I love you both deeply, and I know that as long as you have each other you will both be okay. _

_Westlife - Swear It Again_

_All my love, Margo_

Maura leaned her back against the wall in the hallway as a small sob escaped her lips. After returning to work with Jane that afternoon, she thought she had come to the end of her emotional roller-coaster ride, but she was mistaken. She had began the day in a euphoric place after sex with Jane the previous night. And when the itinerary of the day played inside her head she'd started crying uncontrollably. That led to immense fear when she left the house with Margo, and subsequent ecstasy when Margo told her she was leaving Joyleen. The happiness increased with each minute as she signed the paperwork and then shared the news with Jane. There was a period of a lull in her roller-coaster ride when she'd worked with her assistant but then the day had come to an end and Jane was there and she couldn't compose herself anymore. That was her peak. But as always, the ride must go back down, it can't possibly stay forever suspended in the air. And the decent had began the second she walked into her house. Except the roller-coaster was taking a less brutal route now. Instead of the pain and agony and fear of earlier on, now she just ached. She wasn't sure why though.

Margo's letter had taken her twelve years back. She could vividly recall the _girl _she was back then, and it bore no resemblance to the woman she was now. In her attempt to absolutely right things with Joyleen, she had over looked how much she was hurting Margo. Was it really her fault that Margo still loved her? Should she be crucified for finding a greater love in Jane? Was she not already forgiven for walking out on Margo back then? Maura thought all these answers had been answered days ago, but now it seemed as if it was all coming back.

And then Margo had to put that damn song at the end. Their song.

* * *

**AN: Hope there weren't too many errors.**


	26. Apologies and goodbyes

**AN: This chapter is dedicated especially to the 3 guests that left their wonderful reviews with concerns about how Margo has been treated. So yeah, I used some of your idea guys...This is my Disclaimer for that.**

**and jac9815, I'm terribly sorry to keep you up...NOT! :)**

* * *

**I POSTED THE PICTURES ON TUMBLR...CHECK EM' OUT...- ultracollinsj**** ...**

"Maura, what did she say?", Jane rushed to her girlfriend's side.

Maura wiped her tears roughly, hating everything she was going through. Joyleen must have sensed what an emotional time it was so she just stayed in the kitchen.

"Maura? ", Jane tried again.

"Can you stay with Joyleen, I need to go somewhere?''

"Where...is everything okay", Jane was getting panicky now.

"Yes Jane", Maura's voice rose a little. "I'm sorry", came an immediate apology. She knew nothing was Jane's fault. "Sorry Jane. I just need to take care of something very quickly and I'll be back"

She didn't wait for Jane's answer, she grabbed her purse and headed out the door. Once in her car she dialled Frosts number with shaky hands.

"What's up", Frost answered his phone cheerfully.

"Frost, please, I need your help"

The young detective immediately heard the urgency in the doc's voice and an unfamiliar raspiness that indicated that there had been some crying prior to the call.

"Anything Maura. But...is everything okay?" He couldn't reconcile the happiness that Maura had been in earlier on to the anxiousness he could now hear in her voice.

"Sort of. Are you still at the precinct?"

"Yes"

She breathed a sigh of relief, she was praying for him to still be there, "please can you do me a favour. I would never bother you with a personal matter if it wasn't important"

"Its okay doc, what can I do for you?". Frost would do anything for her. Maura helped whenever she was able to, but never asked for anything. If he could return the favour, he'd do it anytime.

"Could you please...", she paused a bit. It seemed too unethical for her liking, but she didn't really have a choice or any other option. "could you please check the flights lists for Margo Bellamy. She's most likey on a flight to Japan" When Maura had spent the afternoon talking with Margo the day Jane took Joyleen shopping, Maura remembered Margo had said she was liasing with her partner in France where she was supposed to be if not for the situstion with Joyleen. And seeing that Margo had no relations in Boston and didn't particularly like the place, deductive reasoning told Maura the dark blonde was on her way to Japan. She'd most likely take the first available flight, so Maura was running against time.

"On it", the distraught doctor could hear Frost frantically tapping away on his key board. After just a minute, he had the information she needed.

"Okay...here we go. Margo Bellamy. She just checked in, flight starts boarding in one hour"

"Thank you so much", Maura breathed. She was actually crying with relief. She had an hour to make make it to the airport."I'll talk to Jane about this". That was her way of saying don't tell Jane if she calls you.

"I understand"

"I can't express how much this means to me.I'll call you when I sort this out, please text me the details"

"Okay doc, take care". Frost would never interfere with his partners love life, but if something fishy was going on between Maura and Margo, he would sure as hell let the detective know. If for no other reason other than the fact that he could be held liable for facilitating it. He wanted no part of _that. _Jane would skin him alive.

Maura pulled out of the driveway in record speed. Jane had seen her parked in the driveway on the phone before she drove off. She wasn't doing to press it, she knew Maura would explain when she got back. But that didn't mean she had to like it. It had do with Margo, so it was suspicious and she was starting to lose her nerve.

* * *

The blonde drove much faster than the speed limit, she was surprised at the fact that she didn't even care. Under different circumstances, Jane would have been proud of her. She drove through the traffic heading for the airport as fast as she could in the evening traffic. It was just after five, and the fact that it was still peak time didn't make it easy on her. But she made it. She got to the airport 40 minutes later. With her car parked, she grabbed her bag and ran through the entrance. She'd deal with the parking ticket later.

She hurriedly asked the man behind the information desk for details of the flight number that Frost had texted her. With the directions she'd been given, she briskly walked to the gate number.

Gate 42 was crowed, a sign that boarding was about to begin. She almost cried when she saw a short haired dark blonde. Margo was sitting on one of the waiting chairs flicking her finger on her cellphone screen. She had a beautiful short red dress and black heels. Her hand luggage - a rather large handbag - sat by her heels, with a bottle of water beside it.

Not wanting to make a scene, Maura walked towards Margo in silence and at a reasonable pace. Margo was casually picking up her bottled water when her eyes met Maura's. She stared at her in absolute shock as she stilled all her movements. They stared off for a few seconds before Maura started again to walk towards her.

It was like one of those scenes from movies Maura never liked to watch. Margo stood up and Maura couldn't help herself but run into her arms. Margo stayed still for a moment, before wrapping _her _arms around Maura's waist.

"I'm so glad I made it in time", Maura hiccuped. She couldn't stop the tears now. "how could you leave like this?", she pulled away from Margo and yanked the letter out of her bag, "you don't write this to someone and leave Margo!", she yelled.

"Maura", the woman gasped in surprised by the blondes behaviour.

"No, let me talk now, since I didn't get the opportunity to write a letter", Maura didn't even care that nearby people could hear them. Margo was only thankful that she'd sat a little further from the crowd. ''What? You were just going to leave Joyleen like that? No goodbye? You TOLD her you would see her later. How could you leave? What the hell did you expect me to say to her after your disappearance?'', Maura's words were just coming out like vomit now. She no longer knew what the right or wrong thing to say was, never mind their current location. The blonde was also racing against time because Margo would have to leave soon.

She took a deep breath to centre herself - it didn't work.

"I'm sorry Margo", she said angrily. "What I did was wrong. You made one mistake years ago, and I have no right to punish you for eternity. You apologized, and that should have been enough". Margo couldn't understand why Maura was angry. Was the blonde angry at her, or at herself? "I was afraid of being nice to you, afraid of letting you in, okay?"

It didn't seem like a rhetorical question so Margo answered, "okay", she nodded her head.

"You weren't all that pleasant when you got here either, and it seemed you were hell bent on straining things between me and Jane, so I hated you for that. But I forgot that you are human too Margo, and when people are hurt or jealous they do things they don't mean to do", her voice started to lower down a bit now.

"Jane and I just took over Joyleen as if we know everything and are some kind if heroes. It was wrong of us, we didn't respect you the way you deserved to be respected as her mother too. And I'll speak for myself, I had no right to judge you over your attitude to Joyleen. Everyone has their flaws, and its not my position to go about highlighting yours". Maura started to notice the stares after her emotions had reached a manageable level so she sat and pulled Margo down with her so they could talk normally.

"I shouldn't have given you that ultimatum, and I should never have banned you from my house. Your letter...it was lovely. Thank you for thinking all those wonderful things about me"

"Its all true Maura"

"You were wonderful too Margo, and I truly loved you"

Margo smiled sadly at the word 'loved', "but you found someone else like me, only better", Margo repeated the words Maura had said to her before.

"Yes, but I don't want you leave like this, that's why I came here"

"How did you even find me anyway?", the woman wondered.

"I have friends in the force", Maura smirked despite herself.

They shared a small laugh, which diffused the tension a bit as Maura wiped the last of her tears. "please don't leave like this?", she asked again.

"I don't know how else to leave", Margo told her truthfully.

"Say you'll keep in touch. Let us call you, and come to visit occasionally, or let Joyleen come", Maura said.

Margo laughed out loud, "so Jane can shoot me?", Maura had to join in the laughter, as hyperbolic as the statement sounded, it held some truth.

"If you behave yourself there will be no need for brutality, please", Maura begged now. "or at least promise you'll think about it"

"Okay", Margo thought, "you guys can call or email whenever you want and we can take it from there", she suggested.

"Yes, that's okay", Maura nodded enthusiastically as if afraid Margo would change her mind. "I was wrong Margo. I was too rash and drastic in my actions and I'm sorry for hurting you".

"I understand, you had to do what you needed to do for the ones you love, and that's allowed. You shouldn't feel bad for protecting your loved ones"

"I felt bad because I care about you too Margo"

The announcement to begin boarded filled everyone's ears as passengers began to queue.

"That's me", Margo said regrettably .

"Yeah. Thank you", Maura said with all the sincerity she had.

"Thank you too. Take care of her Maura"

"I will", the blonde promised.

Margo pulled her into a final long goodbye hug. "what made you come here?", she asked after pulling apart - Maura still in her arms though.

"The song", was all Maura said. And that's all the answer Margo needed. With a small kiss to Maura's cheek, she picked her bag and walked away to board her flight.

* * *

**AN: Sorry this was short. I am at an awkward place now, trying to decide which route to take this story - there are a few. So I am going to kindly ask you to tell me what you think, just this once, please. **


	27. It's who she is

**AN: I'm so thankful to all of you for sharing your thoughts and offering ideas, I appreciate it. **

**This chapter is all because of ****javalover27,**** she pushed me, and I'm grateful. I was having a very hard time with it.**

* * *

Maura waited until Margo had boarded and was out of sight, then her next predicament presented itself. In her haste to get to Margo and make amends, she'd fractionally tossed Jane to the side. Now that all was well with Margo, she began wondering how she was going to explain herself to Jane. Things in her life were falling together and falling apart at the same time. While all was well with Margo, and Joyleen was hers, Jane was now suffering a little. Maura slowly walked out of the airport, a stark contrast from how she'd walked in. She wondered what Jane was doing, what the brunette was thinking, and most importantly, what Jane was feeling.

As she got into the drivers seat of her Prius, her first call was to Frost. If she was going to fix this, she needed to do it truthfully, timely, and tactfully.

''Hey Doc'', Frost answered without the earlier chipper-ness he'd used.

''Hello Frost. I wanted to thank you again, I made it on time''

''It's no problem hey''

''I didn't mean to come off as secrective or deceitful in my actions. As you may imagine, I didn't have time, so I couldn't sit and explain everything to Jane before I left''

Frost understood what Maura was trying to say, and he respected her for the effort. ''I understand Doc''

''I'm on my way home now, thank you again''

''Take care''. And like that they ended their conversation.

...

Maura's heart was beating loudly in her ears. Her palms were sweaty and a dull headache was forming across her forehead. She had no idea what state Jane would be in when she arrived. She had briefly considered calling to test the waters, but figured that would only make it worse. Jane had been somewhat unpredictable in her actions since everything began, so the doctor didn't know what to draw from it. All she knew was that she had to be honest with Jane, and understanding of however she was going to take in all of this.

The only thing Maura was sure of was that there was going to be lots of talking. And that would involved increased and decreased volume levels. Jane was a very expressive and passionate person, meaning she'd want the opportunity to do just that. And any prevention would likely cause an escalation to an already fueled 'pre-argument'.

...

''_Hello'', Angela answered her phone. _

''Hello Angela. I hope I am not disturbing you''

''_Of cause not honey, is everything okay?'', Angela worried._

''I'm not sure yet'', Maura told her. ''could I please ask for a favour?'', Maura was driving home, and this is the best idea she could come up with – Angela.

''_Anything'', The woman told her. _

Maura could hear little TJ in the background making loud cooing noises and Angela seemed to be moving about with the phone settled between her ear and her shoulder. ''Would it be alright if I brought Joyleen to spend the night?'', she started tentatively and quickly added, ''I know you have TJ and it's a lot to ask….'', she sighed deeply. ''Jane and I…'', she paused a bit, ''Jane and I need to talk. Now. And I don't think we can do it with Joyleen around''

_Angela took it all in. Having raised three children, she knew what it was like to need some privacy to have an intense discussion with your partner. Back in her days, she always sent Jane and her brother to play outside, and when they were older she made Jane take them out for the movies or something. ''Bring her over Maura, it's no problem. I have work in the morning so just come to pick her up then''_

''Thank you so much Angela. I appreciate it. I am just getting home so I will make it there in about half an hour''. Maura hated having to inconvenience people so much like this. She loathed having to ask for as much favours as she was asking. Having been always independent, the feeling was unfamiliar and she found herself not liking it at all. She made an immediate mental note to start looking for a child minder tomorrow. Someone who would be available at anytime something came up and she needed Joyleen to be watched. She wasn't going to continuously be an inconvenience to the people around her.

When Maura got in the house, she found Jane and Joyleen peering into Buddy's cage. The guinea pig was running around while the two were feeding it carrots. They both turned their heads when they heard Maura walk into view. Maura's heart broke completely in that moment when she saw Joyleen. Bright blue eyes were looking at her with so much uncertainty it made Maura hate herself just a little bit more. Since the _moment _Maura had met the girl, she'd looked at her with nothing but love, and pride, and happiness. Joyleen had never hesitated to run up to her and initiate any contact or conversation. Now the young girl stood by Jane's side, watching Maura with a somewhat blank face.

Maura had an idea what Joyleen was feeling. She'd experienced that many times growing up. That moment of not being sure. Maura knew Joyleen was confused. The girl had been watching what was happening quietly, and Maura knew she wasn't stupid or naiive. And the reason she was pulling back was because she didn't know if Maura wanted any contact, she didn't know if Maura was still upset, and better yet, she didn't know the reasons for all of this. And her best guess, given the situation, would be that it was all because of her. So Joyleen just stood there, waiting to be guided in some sort of way.

The blonde stepped further into the house, wondering what conversation had taken place between her lover and her daughter in her absence. What she wanted to fix first was the uncertainty in Joyleen's eyes. She never wanted Joyleen to feel like she couldn't approach her at any time – whether she was upset or crying or happy.

And it didn't help that Jane was standing there looking the same way. Except, Jane was looking a large fraction pissed. The tall detective had her jaw clenched and was lightly tapping her one foot on the ground.

''Come here sweetheart'', Maura called Joyleen softly, unable to make any prolonged eye contact with Jane. Maura knew shipping Joyleen of right now was not a wise idea, but what she also knew was that it was better than having her hear or see Jane and her argue.

That was the guidance Joyleen needed, so she happily bounced off to Maura – not too happily though. ''I'm sorry I was upset earlier on. Do you think you can do something for me baby?'', she weaved her fingers into Joyleen's loose hair.

''Yes'', came the unsure answer. The young girl was looking at Maura intently, not wanting to miss a single word.

''I am going to take you over to Angela's for a sleepover. She is babysitting TJ and the little guy could do with a friend''

''Really?'', Joyleen beamed.

''Yes. So you can go upstairs and quickly pack an overnight bag''

''Okay. I wont be long'', she turned and ran upstairs, making a sudden halt when she remembered, ''Jane, can you please give Buddy some water before you go to bed?''

Jane didn't answer immediately, her eyes were glued to Maura. When she realized the words spoken were meant for her, she quickly rasped, ''Sure kid'', and Joyleen continued her journey.

Maura finally met Jane's pained eyes again. ''I want to talk to you Jane'', she spoke ever so quietly. ''But I didn't want to do it while Joyleen was here. Can you wait till I get back?''

Jane watched her. She wasn't sure what she was expecting to find in Maura's eyes, but whatever it was, she wasn't seeing it. And for whatever reason, it was making her frustrated. ''Yeah, whatever'', and she too headed upstairs.

It was only in that moment that Maura realized something else. Angela was living in Jane's apartment. Which met taking Joyleen there was going to bring questions back with the girl. It was unspoken, and Maura was positive that Margo and Joyleen just assumed Maura and Jane lived together – had always. But now with Joyleen going over to Jane's apartment, the girl was going to learn that the detective had her own place and it was going to appear questionable.

Joyleen came bounding downstairs loudly with a satchel in her hand. The living situation was going to be dealt with later. What was most important was talking to Jane, and she had to do it, at whatever price it came.

...

Joyleen chatted happily all the way to Angela's, innocently oblivious to Maura's turmoil. Maura also knew she still had to talk to the girl about Margo and….it was all just a mental and emotional overload for her. But as long as Joyleen would be out of the way whilst she pulled herself together, she would be happy to spare the girl any unease.

The drop off at Angela's happened rather quickly, with Maura being in a haste to get back to Jane. she told Angela they would talk about it at another time, and the elder woman was happy to oblige. The drive on the way back was a rather long one. The blonde was anxious and wondering what state she was going to find Jane in when she returned. Part of her thought of going over a speech in her head, but she figured that would be a waste of time. Whatever she had to say to Jane had to be the truth, and from the heart, rehearsing was not an option.

When Maura got home, she found that Jane was still upstairs and quickly made her way there. It was only 8:30pm but Jane was already in her sleep wear. The brunette was lying on her back with one hand under her head and the other covering her eyes. Maura walked up to the side of the bed, and sat on the small space Jane left between herself and the edge of the bed.

Maura jumped right into it when she was certain Jane was wide awake. ''I firstly want to apologize for putting you after Margo and Joyleen in this instance. If I could have done it any other way I would have. I was limited in time and experience, so I acted instinctively. Not to say that my instincts don't tell me to put you first, no. It's just that I was working towards making the situation right by everyone. I understand that that type of heroism isn't becoming, and for that I'm sorry. The realization of my mistakes came to me after each event. And that shouldn't be an acceptable excuse, but I'm sorry nonetheless''

''It's okay'', Jane shrugged, still in the same position Maura found her in.

''No its not''. Maura was afraid of this. An angry Jane was better. But when she didn't want to talk, it became worse. It meant she was even more hurt or pissed off.

''I said its okay, lets just forget it''

''Jane. What I did is-''

''No!'', Jane said vehemently, finally removing the hand that was covering her eyes and propping herself up on one elbow. ''What you did pissed me the hell off''

''I know-''

''No you don't. I'm not the one receiving fancy letters from my ex-girlfriend and immediately running after her. Why didn't you bring her back? The hotel was posh enough for her?''

''Jane, please. She's not in a hotel'', Maura was trying to speak calmly hoping it would prevent the situation from escalating.

''Look, I don't care about the details of where-''

''She's gone Jane. She left for Japan'', Maura announced hurriedly trying to avoid any interruption.

''She what?''

''I had gone to the airport-''

''Fucking hell'', Jane laughed humourlessly as she got off the bed.

''Jane-''

''So you're telling me you ran off to the airport to what….bid her goodbye?''

''I couldn't just let her leave like that''

''LIKE WHAT?'', Jane yelled. ''Weren't you the one that _told _her to leave?''

''And I was wrong''.

Jane had to sit back down, the energy in her legs couldn't hold her up much longer. She was of the assumption that Margo had told her which hotel she was staying at and that's where Maura had gone. But to run all the way to the airport for your former lover, it seemed a bit too sentimental for Jane's liking.

''Margo wasn't a wonderful guest'', Maura explained. ''She was rude and disrespectful. And it caused me to retaliate in a manner I'm not accustomed to. The situation was hard on all of us Jane, but we had each other and she was alone. I'm not defending her, I'm just saying that I felt like I was too hard on her. And I felt a little selfish in asking her to give up Joyleen completely. I ran out quickly because I wanted the chance to apologize in person''

Its true what they say, that the same things you love about a person are the same things you hate about them when something goes wrong. Jane in the beginning days of their friendship had first been attracted to Maura's kindness and consideration – platonically. It was refreshing to meet someone who was genuinely genuine. Maura was kind to everyone, even people that did her wrong. And as their friendship progressed and Jane's feelings turned into love, the brunette fell in love with that compassionate side of Maura.

If Maura had cut out of her life everyone who had been unkind and uncaring to her, she wouldn't have anyone from the few people she had. But the blonde was forgiving and understanding. She forgave the people that taunted her at school, she forgave her parents – both biological and adoptive, she even forgave Jane after shooting Paddy, and also took in her less than pleasant grandfather. That was the person she was, the one that always saw the good in people, and was readily willing to give them a second chance.

It had always been endearing to Jane. She'd always loved that quality. But now it came at her expense, and that didn't seem so nice anymore. Maura's intentions with Margo were pure, Jane didn't have to be told that. Its just that the girlfriend side of her didn't really like it. She felt irrationally jealous and wished Maura wouldn't be so nice and caring to her ex-lover. But if she felt all these things and said all these things, she'd be a liar.

She looked up and saw Maura watching her nervously. She had been quiet for too long and Maura didn't want to interrupt her train of thought. ''Come here'', Jane put her hands out to Maura so the blonde could move into her personal space while she continued to sit on the bed. ''When I said I loved you, I told you I loved every part of you. I told you I would never want you to change and that I loved you just as you were. I meant it. And I'm sorry for being upset. You're a kind person, and I love that about you. I guess I just felt-''

''Jealous'', Maura supplied. Jane offered her a small smile and nodded. ''And that's exactly how Margo felt. That's why she acted-''

''Bitchy'', Jane finished for her.

''Yes'', they both shared a laugh.

''But while we're on the same note, you aren't gonna go running after Ian if he comes back are?'', Jane joked seriously.

''Don't be silly, of course not. The situation is different Jane''

''I know''. Jane began playing with the hem of Maura's jumper. She had her other hand on the doctors hip wondering what the best words to use for what she wanted to say were.

''You can tell me, or ask me Jane'', the blonde put her arms around Jane's neck.

''What did she say to you, that made you bolt out of here so quick?''

Maura moved her hands, clearly about to go somewhere, ''No'', Jane held her hips firmly. ''I don't to read it, just tell me''. She wasn't sure she wanted to know the exact words used in that letter.

''She reminded me of the person I was all those years ago, and how much I've grown and changed. And she told me what a wonderful person I was and that…'', she wasn't sure whether to say it or not. Might as well right? ''she said she was still in love with me, and always has been''

Jane cringed a little at the words, but she understood – despite not wanting to. Who in their right mind would get to know Maura and not fall completely in love with her forever? The important thing was that Maura loved _her. _

''I don't love her'', Maura needlessly added (just in case there was any confusion). ''I care for her, that's why I went after her. I cant imagine what she might have been going through the whole time she saw us together, and on top of that losing a daughter. I know there are lots of other complexities in between, but the bottom line is that it must have been hard. I didn't want her to go away feeling completely uncared for. And I love Joyleen, and I just felt-''

''You don't have to justify your actions Maura. I understand. I was just a little….you know'', she couldn't bring herself to say the word jealous again, ''but it doesn't mean I didn't understand. I do''

''Thank you Jane'', Maura bent down to press her lips against Jane's. ''I love you'', she told her again.

''I love you too''. And Jane pulled Maura on top of her as they fell back on the bed together. ''So tell me'', Jane asked in between kisses. ''Why did you take Joyleen to Ma?''

''I just thought…''

''You figured there'd be a lot of shouting didn't you''

''I suppose, yes'', Maura said sheepishly, feeling a little stupid for taking such a precaution.

''Talk about always being prepared'', Jane said as she smacked her ass playfully. ''Well, since the child's not home. We might as well make use of our alone time''

''Why detective, I see you already have parenting done to an art now''

''What can I say, I'm smart aren't I''

''You are'', Maura kissed her girlfriend hungrily, liking Jane's suggestion very much.

They kissed each other for a while, taking their time to explore each others mouth just like they had done during their first kiss. When the need for more contact became unbearable, Maura lifted herself off Jane and began undressing herself.

''Heeeey'', Jane whined at the loss of contact. Maura didn't stop though, she slowly took each article of clothing off, eyeing Jane sudectively and daring her to make a move. When every piece of material was off her, Maura modelled her way into the en-suite, heavy breasts bouncing up and down and she walked away.

The blonde turned the hot water on and stood under the spray for a moment, relishing in the hot droplets hitting against her skin. Before she knew it, her detective was sliding the shower door open. ''May I?'', Jane asked.

''By all means. But don't touch'', Maura eyed her own body in explanation. Jane wanted to protest but the blonde held her finger up to silence her. So Jane stood by the wall, painfully watching as the water ran down Maura's body. The blonde's nipples were hard and the goosebumps on her body where just screaming to be kissed.

''Maura'', Jane begged breathlessly. It was torturous for Jane to have to watch and not touch.

Maura completely ignored her, as she began to massage her own breasts. It was such a turn on Jane could feel the wetness beginning between her legs. The doctors small hands squeezed her own breasts as she threw her head back allowing the water to cascade freely down her. It didn't help Jane when Maura let out a soft moan, and increased the pressure on her massages.

Jane swallowed through her dry throat as she watched the soft flesh dipping in and pushing out from Maura's efforts. And just when the brunette thought she could join in on the action, she saw Maura's hand travel down her body until it got to her center. And then the blonde used two fingers to open up her folds and moaned at the wetness she was met with and the sensation of such contact.

Against the wall, Jane quietly watched as Maura turned to fully face her. The doctor rubbed further into herself, before sinking her two fingers into her wet pussy. ''Oh Jane'', she moaned. And that was the last of the brunettes resolve, she couldn't keep watching and not do anything about it. She practically collided into Maura as she attacked her lips.

''I'm not as strong…..as you….think I am….you know'', Jane confessed between the kisses. Her hands landed on Maura's breasts and continued from where the blonde had left off. Wanting to taste Maura so badly, Jane went down on her. The brunette was on her knees as she flicked the tip of her tongue onto Maura's clit.

There isn't anything on earth Jane loved more than the sounds Maura made during sex. She was verbal, and responsive, and Jane love it.

After the bathroom sex, they moved to the bedroom, where Maura then returned the favour. They must have had about four rounds of sex before finally falling asleep. It was rough and loud, and slow and sweet, and everything in between. It was I love you and I'm sorry. It was we'll be okay, and I trust you.

* * *

**AN: This chapter is the beginning of the end….sadly (thank you LMitch95). We will have a few more chapters definitely. And then maybe a short sequel if you guys want.**


	28. ANNOUNCEMENT

**Authors Note:**

**It is with great regret that I announce that I will no longer be able to continue this story. I can not tell you how sorry I am for this. So, if there is anyone who is willing to pick up from where I left off, please PM me and we can discuss. All I can offer is a few idea's, and/or beta for you, but everything else will really be up to whoever wants to do this.**

**Again, I'm terribly terribly terribly sorry. You guys were so nice and kind to me. And I totally enjoyed writing this. I actually made a couple of friends...#sweet.**

**So PM me.**

**And please don't yell at me for abandoning this...I'm really sorry.**


	29. Our family, our home

**AN: Credit henceforth goes to my cousin who has taken over the story. She had to go through an intensive crash study of Rizzoli and Isles (I made her watch all my favourite episodes from season 1 – 4). And then she obviously had to read through the whole story, and through your reviews, and then she finally started writing. She's trying to 'write like me' as she says….hahahaha. She doesn't have a fanfic account but rest assured, all your reviews and PM will be read and responded to by her (she now has ownership of my account till this story is through). My only input is this authors note, and the reviews I will be leaving for her….lol. If she makes some continuity mistakes please don't hesitate to point them out to her….**

**Oh, there also probably won't be anymore sex scenes, she can't write those apparently. Hope my cousin doesn't disappoint you guys…her name is Edith, please be kind, everything is new for her.**

* * *

Maura's assistant had literally just started at BPD but Maura had no choice besides to leave her in charge immediately. She seemed well qualified and capable so Maura wasn't really worried. She had 'family issues' to attend to. So as Jane left to go to work that morning, Maura headed over to Angela's to take Joyleen, she had a ton of legal issues to sort out, and the sooner it was done, the better.

''….and then TJ vomited all over me. It was disgusting, but funny'', Joyleen gleefully told Maura stories about her night with Angela.

''That happened to me once before. Sadly, I was dressed to go to work and had to change all over again'', Joyleen burst out laughing. Maura smiled at her, happily and sadly at the same time. She wasn't sure how the girl was going to take the news that Margo had left. And then there was the whole lawyer and court thing they were going to go through for a short period. Maura also feared the question of why Jane had her own apartment. That morning Jane had told Maura to tell Joyleen to ask _her _instead. Maura couldn't lie, and she didn't want the girl to feel like she was being thrust into an unstable environment when she'd been sure Jane and Maura lived together all this time.

To her relief, the question never came. Joyleen was so wrapped up in giving minute to minute accounts of the past night. The two had now pulled into Maura's lawyers parking lot.

''What are we doing here?'', the girl queried as she took in her surroundings.

''We are going to see my lawyer. I have to sign some paper work and then we have to go to see a judge and another lawyer''

''Why?'', she wondered.

Maura thought for a little while, but figured she must have had this conversation with Joyleen before even coming here. ''I'm sorry honey, I should have spoken to you about this before driving here''

''It's okay'', the girl shrugged.

''We need to collect your paperwork and then tomorrow we go to apply for your new birth certificate''

Joyleen seemed to be thinking about this for a while, before asking her question. ''Does that mean my name has to change?''. She sounded emotionless and Maura wasn't sure what to conclude from it.

''Not necessarily. I will never do anything you are not happy to do, okay?''

''Okay'', she nodded.

''So…uhhh…do you…you know'', the normally articulate doctor was struggling with her words now. She didn't know how to ask the question, or if she even should. Joyleen was patient, and waited for Maura to pull herself together and finally she did. ''Do you want to change your name?''

The simple question didn't have quite so simple an answer. So Joyleen responded with _her _own question. ''Change it to what?''

''Not your first name, I meant your uhhh…your surname''

''Oh. You mean to make me Joyleen Yolanda Isles?''

''Yes'', Maura whispered quietly.

''I guess it only makes sense'', after a beat she added, ''What about Rizzoli?''

Aha!

That was Maura's biggest fear. She wanted her child to be a Rizzoli too, but she needed permission from the owners of that surname. She hadn't asked Jane yet, or Angela for that matter. But she also didn't want Joyleen to feel like she had to _ask _to be considered illegible for that category. She wanted Joyleen to just _feel _like she belonged. Maura herself _felt _like a Rizzoli. It wasn't written anywhere, but she knew she belonged with them. And she wanted the same for Joyleen.

''Yes, that too'', Maura said simply.

''Joyleen Yolanda Isles-Rizzoli'', the girl tested it on her tongue. Maura couldn't help but smile, it sounded beautiful. _''Doctor Maura Isles-Rizzoli '', Maura thought._

The two went through a few technicalities and policies and procedures with the lawyer before having to head over to the judge. It was really quite simple in their case. Maura had complete and full rights over Joyleen so she could make whatever decisions she liked regarding the girl – and Joyleen wasn't complaining. In order for her to take the Rizzoli name though, Jane had to sign some paper work. And it would be at least six months before Jane could officially adopt Joyleen too. So far, Jane could get Parental Responsibility to the child until another title could be granted. That also needed Jane's signature. So with all the paperwork in hand, Joyleen and Maura decided to head over to BPD to surprise Jane with lunch.

Stepping out of her comfort zone, Maura stopped with Joyleen at a pizza place and made a double order of large pizza and wings to-go. The greasy food was accompanied by two one litre ginger ales and Maura had no doubt Jane and Joyleen would finish their potions – with her help of course, though little.

...

They entered the bullpen quietly and stood by the door watching Jane. She had her back to them flailing her arms wildly over a cold case that was frustrating her. When the brunette noticed Frost looking over her shoulder she immediately turned. There she saw her beautiful Joyleen and a radiant Maura, it was a sight for sore eyes for sure - her family.

''Jane'', Joyleen ran up to her. The detective hoisted her lightly off the ground in a bone crushing hug.

''Hey kid, missed you''. She took the boxes of pizza in her hand that looked like they were about to hit the ground.

''Thanks'', smiled the girl. ''we thought we'd surprise you for lunch. And you promised to show me where you work'', smirked Joyleen.

''And _that _ I will do''. Maura walked over and placed the drinks and boxes of wings on Janes desk. ''Hey beautiful'', Jane whispered.

''Hi'', Maura smile into the small kiss. ''We brought lunch, Detective Frost, Korsak'', she acknowledged the two men in the room.

''Hey Doc'', they said in unison.

''This is for you'', the ball of energy began unpacking everything. She placed on Frost's desk half of whole of their order, ''Both''

''Like he'd let me have all this on my own'', Frost joked with Korsak.

''Thank you'', the young detective smiled at the girl.

''You're welcome'', came the very proud reply.

''You want to go to see my office?'', Maura asked Joyleen. She frowned a little, and Maura knew exactly why. ''we will come back here after lunch''

''Oh good'', breathed the girl in relief.

The threesome made their way over to the morgue. Maura had texted her assistant to let her know she would be using the office during lunch and to also tell her to make the place as child friendly as possible.

''Noooo…'', Jane pulled Joyleens arm as soon as they walked into the morgue. The girl looked excited and was about to freely explore. ''We can't look around in here okay, but I promise to show you around the rest of the building''

''Is this where they keep the dead people?'', Maura and Jane didn't miss the hint of sadness in her voice. They knew her thoughts probably must have wondered over to her late grandmother.

''Yes. But what about we have some lunch huh. You brought me my favourite kid'', Jane attempted lightening up the mood. It worked like a charm. They sat in Maura's office and all enjoyed their lunch. And just as Maura had suspected, they cleaned up every last crumb – _her rascals, she thought. _

''So you got all these from Africa?'', the girl asked in wonderment. She was going through just about everything in Maura's office. Not a stone had been left unturned, as they say.

''Of all the things to bring from Africa'', Jane piped in, receiving a light shove from her girlfriend. ''Ow''

After their meal, Maura caught up with the little bit of work she had missed that morning while Jane showed Joyleen around. The detective felt proud to show her little girl around the place, and Joyleen couldn't have been happier. They bumped into Frankie at some point, and Angela too in the café, and eventually their tour was over.

''This is for you'', Maura handed Jane a file while Joyleen goofed off with Frost and Korsak.

''What's this?'', the curious detective was already opening it up.

''No'', Maura placed her hand to halt Jane's progress. ''Take a look at it while we're gone, and bring it home to me after work''

''But-''

''Whatever you decide is okay with me Jane. _N__othing _will change my love for you''

Jane just smiled and offered a her quick kiss. As terrible as it was, she suddenly was eager for Maura and Joyleen to be on their way so she could see what Maura had left her with. She wasn't disappointed. Because minutes later Maura and Joy were on their way out.

''Be right back'', Jane said as she walked away from her desk. She had a feeling she was going to need a bit of privacy for whatever decision she had to make.

A minute later she was walking into the break room where she took a seat in the far corner. Thankfully the room was empty – people had just finished lunch. Opening the file, Jane's mouth hung open. She quickly scanned the papers before her. There was a form she had to fill in and sign that apparently gave her responsibility of Joyleen – after Maura of course. And then there was a form regarding a new birth certificate for Joyleen. She had to sign agreeing that she was willing to give the girl her name as well – Rizzoli.

Its not that she had to think about it, its just that she was too overwhelmed to steady her hands enough to sign the papers. She also wanted to text Maura, but doubted she would be able to type the keys, so she resorted to gathering everything and going over to the café to see her mother.

''Hey Jan- are you okay'', her mothers expression changed from happy to concerned in .7777 of a second.

Jane just thrust the file into her mothers hands. Angela made quick work of finding out what had made her tough daughter so teary at work. And it wasn't long until she was squealing and rushing around the counter to hug her daughter.

''Oh Jane this is wonderful''

''It is isn't it'', Jane wasn't even embarrassed that she was hugging her loud mother at work for once.

''So you are going to officially be a mother, and she's going to be a Rizzoli'', the woman gushed.

''Yeah'', was all Jane could manage through the emotions.

''Why haven't you sighed in?'', the woman worried. Afraid that maybe her daughter wasn't for the idea.

''I didn't have a pen for one. And my hands just weren't steady enough'', she said sheepishly.

''Oh come here baby'', Angela hugged her again.

* * *

When Jane got home that night, she was greeted by an emotionally spent Maura. ''Hi'', the blonde said as she finished clearing the dishes. She and Joyleen had just finished sharing their meal because Jane ended up being late.

''You okay?'', warning bells began ringing in her head immediately.

''Sort of I suppose'', she shrugged, completing her last wipe-down.

''You look exhausted honey'', Jane walked over to her girlfriend and held her at arms length for closer inspection.

''I spoke to Joyleen about Margo when we got home''

''And…'', Jane prompted when the blonde had been quiet for longer than was considered a normal pause.

''She took it well, and seemed to understand. Then she said she wanted to ring her to find out if she got to Japan alright''

''And…'', Jane asked again.

Then Maura started to cry all of a sudden. ''She didn't pick up Jane''

The detective took her in her arms for a strong embrace, ''It's okay Maur. We'll try her again''

''We tried already, _five times. _And just after dinner she tried once again and when….when Margo didn't answer she said she was going to bed. It was only eight Jane. And…and you know Joyleen doesn't like to sleep early…''

''Maura, calm down'', Jane tried to console her.

''No Jane'', Maura pulled herself slightly lose from Jane. ''She's upset. And she isn't talking to me about it. What if she doesn't want to stay here anymore. Oh Jane, what should I do?''

''Just-''

Maura cut her off, ''I just let her go upstairs. I didn't want to hover and….I just let her be. Was that a good idea?'', she looked pleading at Jane with red-rimmed eyes.

''Maybe. It's nice to have some space sometimes. Since its been a little while maybe you can go to talk to her now'', Jane suggested.

''What will I say? Do come with me please Jane''

''Sure''. The detective sometimes forgot how insecure Maura could feel about things un-science related. And since motherhood had just landed into her life recently, the doctor was bound to have her moments where she felt inadequate and lost. Jane understood this, because she was just like that too. That's why they were perfect together, they balanced each other out. They were the other's stepping stone in times of trouble.

...

The knock on Joyleen's door was soft as the two adults stood with bated breath.

''Come in''. Joyleen was lying on her bed doing something on her iPad.

''Hey kid'', Jane greeted her.

''Hi'', she smiled simply at the two women.

''Can we join you?'', Jane asked hopefully.

''Sure'', she moved to the middle to allow Jane and Maura to fit on either side of the bed. Following Jane's cue, Maura lied down on her stomach as well (albeit feeling slightly uncomfortable – more so about the situation than about their positions).

Sensing a talk was coming, Joyleen closed the cover of her iPad and waited. ''You know people are very different, and understanding and accepting that uniqueness is one of the best things we can ever do for ourselves'', Jane began. Maura's eyes grew wide. She hadn't been expecting _that. _''I'm sorry that Margo left, we both are'', she looked to Maura for confirmation and the blonde nodded. ''All three of us can't really be your parents and live together. You understand that right?''

''Yeah''

''So your mom had to leave, because she trusts that you'll be safe and happy with us here. Its not because she doesn't care or that she doesn't love you. its only because she wants what's best for you''

The girl nodded again.

''Her not picking up doesn't mean anything okay. There could be several reasons why she hasn't gotten back to you yet. And I'm not saying that you shouldn't be upset or sad, I'm just saying that you shouldn't think the worst and that me and Maura are here for you. For anything you may want. Talk to us okay, about _anything. _We won't push you sweetie, but we're here'', Jane placed a small kiss to the side of the girl's head.

''I'm sorry. I was just worried'', Joyleen confessed, looking at Maura.

''Sweetheart, you don't _ever _have to apologize for that okay. This is your home, and you have the right to express yourself okay'', Maura looked at her with tears in her eyes, hoping the girl understood.

And she did. ''Thanks mum'', she said. And Maura felt all her internal organs shut down. This was the first time she'd ever been called mum. And the feeling was one she would never be able to describe for years to come. She was now a mother.

''It's alright baby''. The three of them collided into an awkward three-person hug, each person feeling much more happier than they had ever been. They eventually burst out into laughter over their strange positions and goofed off together until falling asleep – all in Joyleen's bed.

* * *

**AN: Thank you all for understanding that I couldn't finish this. But I have my ways of making it up to you...**


	30. Bonds

''To Jane Rizzoli, Maura Isles, and Joyleen Isles-Rizzoli'', everyone clicked their soda glasses together at the round table. The Rizzoli family and the extended Rizzoli family had all gone out on Friday night to celebrate. They were all welcoming Joyleen into the family, and congratulating Maura and Jane. Everyone had had their turn to speak a few words to the new couple and the clicking of glasses signified the end of the speech period. ''here here'', they all chorused.

The rest of the meal was loud. TJ fussed, the guys raised their very opinionated views, Angela tried to bring the volume down by raising _her _voice, Joyleen laughed hysterically and it went on and on like that. Jane and Maura were the quietest ones of everyone else. For them, it was a tad emotional and over whelming. They had gone through a week of signing documents and waiting in anticipation for everything to go through smoothly. Maura had spent some time looking for a sitter for Joyleen as well and had also had a few conversations with Hope and Cailin about the developments in her life.

''Seems too good to be true right'', Jane whispered in Maura's ear.

''Yes'', the blonde simply responded. The chatting and arguing and bantering went on until later in the night when they decided it was time to head home. It felt slightly surreal for Jane and Maura to be driving home with a young girl in the back seat of her car - a girl that was now theirs.

It obviously had taken Maura a while to get completely accustomed to being referred to as mum. There had actually been a few times when she hadn't answered Joyleen when she called her purely for the simple fact that she had forgotten it was her that was being referred to. Kind of like how it had been when she first learned she had a sister. When someone had come into her lab to inform her that 'her sister' was waiting for her downstairs, she had been startled, but immediately remembered that she did indeed _have _a sister.

...

With thanksgiving around the corner, preparations were well underway in the Isles-Rizzoli household. Being the first thanksgiving for Joyleen (EVER!), and for Jane and Maura as a couple, the day was scheduled to be a big deal. As you could imagine, Joyleen knew next to nothing about the holiday. So Maura had taken it upon herself to well educate her daughter about it. Joyleen had been treated to museum and library trips. By the time Maura was done with her, she probably had more knowledge about the holiday than American children her age had.

To Maura's _great _relief, Hope and Cailin were traveling to England for that time period, which left the day a tad stressless for Maura. Balancing _her _newly acquired family as well as the Rizzoli's was going to be a feat. And when she really thought about it, there were three families to entertain. It would have been her biological family, the Rizzoli's and then the Isles-Rizzoli's.

* * *

On their way to meet Hope and Cailin before the duo left the country for the small holiday

''I think I am a little bit scared'', Joyleen fidgeted.

''Whatever for?'', the doctor took her eyes from the road for a second.

''What if she thinks I'm not cool or trendy or something'', she continued to fret.

Maura had to laugh, only because she completely understood what it felt like to be frightened of meeting new people. Granted, she was better off with that now. But that pesky little feeling of anxiety never really left her.

''I think you'll find that they won't be too worried about those things honey''

Joyleen fished her cell phone out of her pocket when it beeped; it was a text from Jane

**Hey you. Pliz dnt tell me u're still nervous – J**

**I am – JOY**

**Well dnt b. They'll like u….xoxo – J**

**Thanks – JOY**

She shoved the phone back into her pocket feeling like a part of the weight had been lifted off her shoulders. There was something about knowing Jane was thinking about her that made her feel vastly better.

''Jane?'', Maura asked in reference to the text messages.

''Yes, she was just telling me not to be nervous''. Maura smiled. Her girlfriend was really sweet when she wanted to be. The detective had been pissed about the fact that she had to work that weekend and couldn't join Maura and Joyleen on their trip to Hope's. Part of her though, felt it would be better if they had a little family time on their own, but then the other of her knew Maura would want her to be with her anywhere – there was no intrusion ever.

Forty minutes later, Maura pulled into Hope's driveway. She was impressed by how calm she felt, and that helped her put Joyleen at ease. Walking up to the door, she knocked lightly. Maura had recently found herself doing studies on herself. She'd do things unconsciously, and then later replay and analyse them. As it was, she found herself subconsciously taking inventory of what Joyleen was wearing. Her brain was doing the math on age and body mass, and equating it to every piece of clothing Joyleen had on. And then she was thinking back to the activities Joyleen had been partaking in in the last hour (mostly just sitting in the car) and comparing it to what she had eaten so far. All of that was in an effort to make sure that the girl was warm enough. In her mind it happened so fast, and all on its own. But it was after all was said and done that she began to shake her head at herself. She had turned into a mother so naturally. It was strange even to her. All of Angela's hovering all of a sudden didn't seem so crazy. Because she found herself constantly thinking about Joyleen and wondering if she was comfortable, and happy. Or if she'd had a balanced meal to eat, or taken a bath, or drank enough water. It was mentally taxing, but was something she had no control over – it happened and that was that.

The door opened and revealed a pleased looking Hope, the elder woman's eyes travelled between Maura and Joyleen quickly before she spoke, ''She is even more beautiful than you described Maura'', and Hope pulled her daughter into a hug. ''Come here'', she released Maura and took hold of Joyleen. ''It's so nice to finally meet you''

''You too'', the girl smiled shyly.

''Thank you for having us Hope''

''Oh Maura, you guys are welcome here anytime''

She ushered them into the house and called out for her other daughter, ''Cailin''.

The girl could be heard instantly bounding downstairs in a hurry. ''Hey'', she greeted Maura first.

''Hello Cailin'', the blonde offered a hug as well.

''So….your daughter huh'', Cailin looked at Joyleen. ''Nice to meet ya'', she bumped her lightly on the shoulder. It was just as well, the sweetness was starting to make Maura a little dizzy. She wasn't quite used to it….yet.

''Indeed. Joyleen, this is my sister Cailin and my…mother Hope''. Removing the 'biological' part was a job to Maura. It felt a little disrespectful to Constance and it was also hard to say having only known Hope by the title 'my biological mother'. But Maura knew that if there was anyone who could understand the complexities of mothers, it was Joyleen. She'd had two from conception, then a barely there one after birth and another 'only talked about one' aka Maura. Twelve years into her life she had found herself with two full one, and a few days later with only one. Then a few days later again she had one and a half. It was only going to be about six more months until she had two full mothers again. It was all really very complicated to anyone on the outside.

_About a week ago, Maura had sat Joyleen down. ''So, I need to explain my family life to you before we go to meet them''_

''_Sure'', Joyleen smiled. At this point she wasn't sure why it had to be a conversation they had to sit down for. At the end of the talk she'd understand though._

''_Remember I told you I was adopted'', Joyleen nodded. ''My biological parents gave me to Constance and Richard just after I was born, and they raised me. I never knew about my biological parents until a very few years ago. My biological father was not a very good man, he did some bad things and he's in prison now''_

_The young girl gasped a little. _

''_It's okay. We are never going to see him again. And Hope, my biological mother has another daughter like I mentioned before''. Maura purposely neglected mentioning Paddy Doyle's name. She didn't want Joyleen to hear his name associated with the crimes he committed and have to know that that is her 'grandfather'. The lesser she knew the better, for both of them. ''I am only starting to get along with Hope and Cailin now. I am getting to know them more and more as time goes by, but that doesn't change the fact that Constance is still my mother''_

_Seeing the slight confusion on Joyleen's face, Maura elaborated. ''It's just like how I am your mother now, but Margo will always be your mother too. Get it?''_

_Comprehension finally dawning, the girl nodded, ''I see now''_

''_Yes. So we'll arrange to meet them soon alright?''_

''_Yap''_

_And that's how they found themselves at the Martins' that weekend. _

''So are you really my cousin or my aunt'', Joyleen asked as she sank her teeth into a cookie. Maura cringed a little, not at the question, but at the girls snack choice. She so wished she could take that cookie away and replace it with a healthier option – maybe some oven baked crisps.

''Uhhh…'', Cailin looked to her mother and sister for rescue. The young girl had asked a valid question that indeed needed a response.

''Technically, she'd your aunt'', Maura offered. ''But in this case I would think cousin is more appropriate. Cailin is in fact only nineteen and I very much doubt she'd been thrilled in being addressed as 'Aunt Cailin'''

They all burst out into laughter, ''True'', Cailin said. ''Please _never _call me aunt – I would die''. Maura, naturally, would have launched into an explanation as to why it wasn't possible for Cailin to cease to exist only because she was referred to as aunt, but she held herself. Knowing Jane for all those years had helped her to know when to shut it.

So surprisingly, they enjoyed their afternoon at Hope's. Cailin and Joyleen got to know each other and got along amazingly well. At first Maura had noticed how hesitant Cailin had been, but eventually Joyleen worked her charm – it wasn't possible not to like her honestly. Apparently they shared a similar love for **One Direction** which led to a minor karaoke contest in Cailin's room.

This gave Maura and Hope a little time to themselves. ''You clearly have embraced motherhood quite well dear'', Hope commended her daughter.

''Yes. I surprise myself most days'', Maura smiled wistfully.

''Well don't be so surprised Maura, you're a very smart woman''

''Thank you. I thought that too at first, but motherhood comes with so many things that even the smartest of people can't conquer. And it wasn't a very clean slate that I began with also''

''It was trying I must say. And for you to have come out of it in one peace…I can only say how proud I am of you''. Maura had been honest with Hope about everything that had led to Joyleen being in her care, and her mother had been nothing but supportive. The blonde just couldn't take anymore lying and secrets. It was too much for her to keep up with and the only person she felt needed to be spared that was Joyleen.

''It means a lot that you think that of me'', Maura smiled sadly at her mother. The countless nights she had cried herself to sleep wishing for only one thing – that she could meet her birth mother. And now here she was, with a mother who was proud of her. She couldn't be happier.

Hope didn't miss the sadness in Maura's eyes. She knew the woman wondered about a lot of things. And it was a pity that there weren't any words in the world that could fully express how much she loved Maura, and how sorry she was, and how she wished she could turn back time.

''You know Maura'', Hope took the blonde's two hands in her own and looked her directly in the eye, ''the way you feel about Joyleen is the same way I feel about you''

And that's all it took for Maura to finally understand. Because any explanation or excuse Hope gave was never going to be sufficient or understandable. But for Hope to give that example – Maura understood completely now. Because she knew how she felt about Joyleen. And it made sense that any mother should feel that way about their child. It even related back to Constance. Because the Artist woman had tried to make amends with her daughter and explain so many things, but Maura just never understood it. And if she could feel this way about a child she never gave birth too, there was no way Constance couldn't feel it too. And Hope…it probably would be tenfold.

And when she hugged Hope that afternoon. It was their first whole-hearted embrace. The hug that was meant to say 'welcome into my life'. A hug that was meant to say 'you are forgiven'. A hug that screamed 'I love you and I missed you'. And Maura felt healed of all sorts of wounds she wasn't aware she was carrying around.

''The way you love her, is the same way I love you Maura. Don't ever forget that'', Hope said firmly into Maura's ear for good measure. Making sure that her daughter didn't ever have to wonder again – and for as long as Maura loved Joyleen (which was forever), she never would forget how much Hope loved.

* * *

**AN: Hey guys. This writing business is pretty cool. Thanks for your kind words, it really means a lot that you guys like this and I am not just writing to myself - Edith**


	31. Sickness and caring

**AN: Someone asked how long I intend to make this, sorry for not having mentioned that earlier. Much of the story has been covered really. I have three more chapters outlined and I believe that will be the end of this story. Maybe CollinsJ will make a sequel. Thanks**

* * *

Jane lazily walked over to pick up the phone. Maura's house phone rarely ever rang. In fact, she'd somewhat forgotten they even _had _a landline. Jane was just catching up on the latest stats from her favourite teams, Joyleen had gone to bed and Maura was reading her journal upstairs.

''Hello'', she rasped a tad too bitterly. She wasn't exactly squealing over having been interrupted.

''I'm sorry, is this a bad time?'', Margo spoke into the phone. The accent was so distinct it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to figure out it was their former French visitor.

''Margo?'', Jane still asked – needlessly.

''Hello Jane'', it's not like Margo would have missed Jane's voice. It was really very sexy if the woman was honest with herself, which she was. ''I suspect you're doing alright''

Margo always had that weird way of talking. Jane wasn't sure if it was just a culture clash or…..she just didn't get it. Actually, Maura and Constance were also like that. They had a weird way with their words and given the context and tone, most conversations came off…unfriendly you could say. Cold in a sort of way. Jane could trace it back to when she first met her medical examiner girlfriend. It had taken the brunette a while to get accustomed to it and know that Maura was indeed sincere in her intentions, regardless of the words she used. But because she didn't know Margo, it all just came off as a jab, even the simplest of words.

''_I suspect you're doing alright''. Who the fuck says that Jane thought. Couldn't she just say something normal like 'how are you'. _To Jane, Margo's words sounded like they were intended to get a rise out of her. As if Margo was hoping that she wasn't doing alright. Or maybe it was the simple fact that Jane didn't like the woman – fair and square.

''I'm doing excellent'', Jane replied with added vigour.

''Great. I called to speak with Joyleen, if that's alright''. At least she respected the boundaries created, Jane would give her that.

''She went off to bed'', but remembering how much Joyleen had been waiting for this call, she honestly didn't mind waking the girl. ''I'll g-''

''Oh don't wake her if she's asleep. I'll just have a word with Maura then''.

And there Jane was about to offer the woman an award for being sensible. Clearly her boundaries came into play when regarding Joyleen, but not Maura.

''I'll get Joyleen!''. Her tone was final, Margo didn't even say anything. In those words, the French woman knew Jane was saying 'don't you even fucking start. Stay the hell away from my woman'. Message received (at least).

* * *

This years Thanksgiving was unforgettable to Jane, Maura, and Joyleen for reasons different from what they had expected. The Monday before thanksgiving, Joyleen didn't wake up at her normal time. Now this worried Maura greatly, because the girl had showed signs of nothing but consistency since being in Boston. She wasn't the neatest of people – understandable, she was only twelve. And she didn't care too much for dressing up. She liked to look nice, but comfort can before anything else. If it was expensive and trendy and nice and comfortable, then cool. If it was shabby and mismatched and practical and comfortable, then cool too. She wasn't a morning person per se, but she was normally up by eight or sometime after. She didn't do the whole getting ready like Maura thing, but she was at least up by then.

But when Maura had finished having breakfast with Jane and the detective had left for work and it was nearing nine and Joyleen was still yet to wake up, Maura became restless. The blonde despised going into Joyleen's room unless invited. She respected that everyone needed a place that was theirs alone. And for Joyleen, that would be her room. So Maura never crossed that boundary unless she had to. And this morning was one of those 'had to' moments.

''Sweetheart'', she knocked lightly before pushing the door open. The girl was covered in her blankets all the way to her forehead. In fact, the only thing Maura could see was a huge lump in the form of a body-shape in the middle of the bed.

''Honey'', she padded over and slowly peeled off the duvet cover from her daughters face. Her eyes nearly fell out as worry and concern filled every part of her body.

Her daughter had beads of sweat running down her face, in fact, she was wet all over. Maura gasped loudly when her hand made contact with Joyleen's forehead. It was almost as hot as the mug of coffee she'd just been having. ''Oh my God'', the woman said. Her worry only heightened when the girl started to shiver and attempt to pull the covers back over herself.

''Sweetheart'', Maura tried to wake her again. And slowly, oh so slowly, Joyleen attempted to open her eyes. She was murmuring some unrecognizable words as Maura frantically tried to assess her.

''Mum'', the girl said with eyes still trying to open.

''I'm here baby. Open your eyes for me love''. And so Joyleen tried, though her eyelids felt like lead. And Maura wanted to die when she saw the bloodshot eyes of her child. Clearly the girl had come down with something, and whatever it was wasn't good.

Normally, she would have stepped into doctor mode and started making a mental list of all of Joyleen's symptoms to try and reach a diagnosis. Normally she would have avoided contact, or put on a pair of gloves before touching the sick person. Normally, she would have already grabbed her medical bag and been checking the patients temperature and what not.

But there was nothing normal about this. Lying before her was her very sick child and Doctor Maura Isles was nowhere to be found. Here was a woman thinking like a mother and not like a doctor. She was panicked, and in tears, gathering up her daughter in her arms in a useless attempt to make her feel better.

''Does it hurt?'', she whispered into the girls ears. She now had Joyleen's head on her lap as she softly stroked the damp hair out of her face. And before the girl could even answer, she threw up all over Maura.

Now normally the blonde would have been mighty pissed, but she couldn't even find it within her. If anything, it made her even more concerned.

''So-sorry'', the girl whispered. She had wanted to get up and run to the bathroom, but the bile rose so fast and it couldn't match the little energy she had within her.

''It's okay, baby. Don't worry about it''. Maura unzipped the back of her dress and peeled it off her body slowly so as not to spread the vomit everywhere. In just her underwear and bra, she led Joyleen carefully to the bathroom. The girl threw up once again, but at least this time it fell into the desired place. Joyleen also had to strip, her clothes were wet from the sweat and it seemed to be making her hot and cold at the same time.

Normally Maura would have been uncomfortable at the indecency of the situation. But again, this wasn't 'normally'. This was her sick child and nothing else mattered – even the fact that they both had almost no clothes on.

And in that moment, Maura heard her phone ring. ''Jane'', she breathed. The distinct ring tone was unmistakable. ''Here'', Maura took a large towel from the one's displayed in the bathroom – that were never really practical to use, they were just too nice. She covered the whole of Joyleen's body and helped her sit on top of the toilet seat. But by the time she rushed to pick her phone from the girl's night stand, it had stopped ringing. Her girlfriend was nothing but relentless, and so it rang again.

''Oh Jane'', Maura finally broke down.

''Oh my God what's wrong?''. Jane had been on her way to her desk from getting another cup of coffee. She immediately halted her progress. ''Maura, sweetie talk to me'', she pleaded. She could hear her girlfriend cry and she knew something was very wrong. Without wasting much time, she turned on her heals and hurried towards her car. Good thing she'd parked it up front – she had decided she'd head home for lunch the moment she walked out of the house. Maura had been worried and Jane didn't like it.

''I'm on my way Maura okay. Just wait for me. Please tell me everything is alright''

''She's sick'', came a soft whimper.

''It's okay. I'll be there in ten minutes''. She said it as if she was a doctor and could actually do something about Joyleen's state of health. As it was, the person who could actually do some good was already _with _the child. Anyway, her siren was on and she was heading home at lightning speed.

Maura returned to the bathroom and put the shower on, turning the water to a lukewarm temperature. ''Let's get you cleaned up honey'', she tried to sound in control but failed dismally. And once again, Joyleen opened the toilet bowl she was sitting on for yet another round of vomiting. Maura dutifully held her hair and rubbed soothing circles on her back until she was finished.

They eventually made it to the shower. Maura had to get in with Joyleen; there was no way the girl was going to make it in there alone. Joyleen was now crying softly. She hated to be sick – the few times she ever was. And she wasn't sure how she was going to make it without her Meme to sing to her and make her her favourite soup.

And seeing Joyleen cry just made Maura the more helpless. The girl looked frail with her red eyes and hair stuck to her head because of the water. She looked weak and scared, and Maura didn't know what to do to make her feel better. And so she gathered her in her arms into a tight hug. It didn't matter that she was naked in the shower with her twelve year old daughter. That was the very least of her worries at the present moment, in fact, it wasn't _even _a worry because she wasn't thinking about it. She was thinking about why her little girl was sick and what she could do to take it all away.

There was a soft knock on the bathroom door followed by a hesitant ''Maura?''

The doctor peeled herself from her daughter and called out for Jane to enter. And as expected, Jane had taken a step back outside the moment her eyes fell on her very naked girlfriend and very naked daughter. It looked too weird for Jane to handle. ''I'll just uhhhh…wait for you guys here'', she rubbed the back of her neck. If she'd known they were in the shower she would have drove home at a normal speed, because _this _is a party she would have much rather missed.

''Jane please, can you hand us some clean towels''. It was in that moment that Maura actually fully assessed the circumstances and realized how awkward it was - especially for Jane.

''I'm sorry'', she said sheepishly to Joyleen.

The girl didn't know what Maura was apologizing for and had no strength to ask. To Joyleen it wasn't strange, she always showered with her girlfriends and her grandmother had always showered her when she wasn't well. And Maura also wasn't bothered; this was a woman who'd gone to a boarding school. But Jane's presence made her understand how other people could be extremely uncomfortable about it.

''Here'', Jane handed her the towels looking to the side discreetly.

''Jane'', Maura pleaded. Jane knew what that meant. So she turned to look at her girlfriend, who was gesturing for her to help Joyleen out. Gathering all her wits, the shy detective wrapped the towel around Joyleen who was now shivering.

''Are you okay kid?'', Jane asked softly, all shyness gone once she laid her eyes on the very sick girl.

''I don't know'', she sniffed.

''It's okay, your mum here will make you _all _better'', she said confidently. Maura's heart swelled at how much Jane believed in her.

''You can take her to our room'', the blonde instructed. And so Jane led Joyleen there while Maura cleaned up the bathroom a little bit.

''Let me get you something warm to put on'', Jane rushed to Joyleen's room to get her some clothes. And when she walked in her heart leaped out of her throat. There was vomit on the floor and the sheets looked wet. ''Oh God'', she gasped. _Now _she understood why Maura had been such a mess when she called. Thinking of the girl she left sitting on their bed, she quickly pulled out one of Joyleen's thick onesies and some underwear for her. Getting back to her bedroom, she helped the girl into her clothes and opened up the sheets for her lie down. ''We'll be right back honey'', she placed a kiss to her forehead and headed off to Maura.

Jane found the blonde gathering up the dirty bedding and towels. ''What happened?'', Jane asked cautiously. Maura looked unstable and Jane didn't want to do or say the wrong thing.

''I just found her lying there Jane'', the blonde pointed to the bed. ''She was covered in sweat and I panicked. I don't even know what's wrong with her'', the doctor sobbed.

''It's okay'', Jane hugged her. ''Leave all of this for now okay'', Jane gestured to the laundry. ''Let's go be with her for now''

''Okay'', Maura nodded and they went back to their bedroom.

* * *

Having pulled herself together Maura realised that Joyleen had a winter vomiting bug – norovirus. It's highly contagious and if Maura had figured it out soon enough like the good doctor that she is, she would have taken precautionary measures. But she'd acted like the hysterical mothers she'd met during her medical rotations and now it was too late to do anything about it.

They all got the highly contagious bug. There was lots of throwing up and the sick taking care of the sick was never proven to be a good idea. They didn't have a choice though. And so they had missed Thanksgiving. No one could come to them, and they couldn't go to anyone.

In its own little way, it was nice. They had five days of just _them. _They took care of each other, shared a bed the three of them, told stories and listened to music and watched movies. One afternoon when Maura and Jane were particularly out of it, Joyleen had even made her grandmothers famous soup for them. Granted it didn't come out right, but it was the gesture that mattered and the two adults were too sick to care anyway.

It wasn't the holiday they had anticipated, but they loved it nonetheless. There is nothing better than time spent with the people you love the most in the world. When they were feeling better, Jane had laughed at Maura and Joyleen about their naked shower.

''I knew you would never let that one go'', Maura had laughed. And then the blonde locked eyes with her daughter, and both came to the same conclusion. That night when Jane was taking a shower, they both barged in and held Jane hostage in there. Jane's entire body had turned red from embarrassment. But eventually she let loose and did the weirdest thing on earth – at least to _her. _And from then on Jane had lost the power to mock them.


	32. School

**AN: I suppose there is a slight lack of 'Jane and Maura' alone time. Having a child kinda does that to you I must say (not that I know first-hand but…:) you know! I will be sure to make the last chapter all about them. Thanks guys.**

* * *

Maura thought she had perhaps learned all that was there to learn about having a child. Granted there was an infinity of things to add on, but she was pretty confident she had got the basics down to an art. There had been through a lot already with Joyleen, the ups and downs, crying and yelling, sickness and oh so much loving. It seemed to be enough to an extent. Maura thought they were finally alright, that all was well and that things were finally moving smoothly.

She was wrong, so very wrong.

Actually, what she was faced with now might just be the biggest and most important thing of all. She couldn't believe how stupid she'd been in assuming that they had hurdled over the toughest of times.

Yes, her current predicament was school. Where Joyleen was going to go for school. At the surface it may seem like this is not such a big deal. But if there was anyone who knew how crucial this was, it was Maura. She had first-hand experience of that. Because the school you go to greatly shapes the person you become. Whether we like it or not.

The friends we meet there, are people we may never have crossed paths with if we hadn't gone to that school – good or bad (people). And our friends play a major role in the people we are, and become, despite what we are taught at home – Maura knew this very well. And the activities available at school also play a vital role in…_everything. _It all determines our future and who we become - what we will or will not be able to do.

This was big.

This was important.

Maura was younger that Joyleen when she herself had determined her future. She had picked a boarding school in a different country and started an academic life there. And she knew she never would have become the person she was today if she hadn't made that decision. And at that time, she hadn't really thought so far into her future. Her decision was based on her circumstances and a desire for a better and happier (mainly) social life. She thought she'd spare her parents the trouble while she benefited at the same time. It obviously didn't quite work out as she planned, but she made it through alive.

Now she was older and more mature, meaning her perspective is much more different. Now she has to make that same decision she made for herself all those years ago, for Joyleen, for her daughter. And now she isn't just looking at the immediate future, she's thinking of Joyleen five years from now, ten years from now, even twenty years from now. She wishes she'd had someone to consider this for her too at that age – sadly she didn't.

...

It was December third and she planned on taking an entire week off work to find the best school for Joyleen. She needed to have the child registered before the schools closed for the Christmas break, and as it was, she didn't have the amount of time she would have normally liked to have.

Natuarally, the blonde began with a thorough internet search. This was followed by a number of calls to people in high positions she had either worked with or were linked to the Isles foundation in any sort of way. The list of the best schools she got was then narrowed down to five school closest that she had to choose from.

As she expected, Joyleen had been taken by pictures of the schools, or dress code, or location, and other fancy things like that. One school was located in Cambridge and the girl liked it for just that simple reason. ''Cambridge. It sounds fancy'', she'd said.

Maura was not making that mistake. She never would have called herself a strict parent, but the one thing she wasn't going to gamble with was Joyleen's education – never. People might argue that education isn't all there is to live, and to a greater extent Maura knew this given her life for example. But education was also the one thing no one could ever take away from you. If you learned it and if you knew it, it was yours, and no one could ever take that away from you. And she wanted her daughter to have something that no one would rip away from her. She wanted her daughter to have at least something she could fall back on if all things failed. And that one thing would be a good education. Everything else they could compromise, but not this. And luckily for Maura, Joyleen loved all the five school they were going to have to pick a final one from.

* * *

''Are you serious?'', Jane thought she may have lost her mind for a moment. Surely she couldn't be seeing properly.

''Of course I am Jane'', the blonde responded calmly. It was the second and last day of the school searching phase. From the next day they were going to have to drive up to all the schools. The previous day Jane had returned too tired to discuss schools and so they were doing it today.

''Honey, the cheapest amount here is...'', she looked back at the papers in her hand briefly, ''...24,000 dollars. That's an awful lot for middle school Maura''. Jane rounded the couch and took a seat next to her girlfriend. She knew the woman had more that enough funds for that, she just wasn't sure if it was necessary to spend such large sums when there were other options.

''I don't know Jane, I suppose. But these are all wonderful schools'', from the look on Maura's face, Jane immediately realized that the blonde hadn't even bothered to check the tuition and fees. She couldn't help but laugh out loud. ''Whats so funny Jane?'', Maura wondered.

''It's funny, you know. Working together….and being friends and now we're in a relationship. You're so modest that I kinda forget we are in two different universes financially''

''I forget too'', Maura said softly. It was true. They never really discussed money matters, things sort of happened. When Jane moved in it was really the only time they had actually had a conversation based on money. Maura had made it clear that all bills were paid by direct debit and Jane wasn't to worry about that. In return, Jane sort of took care of everything else. When they'd go grocery shopping she'd pay, or when they went out somewhere. And every two days or so she'd always take Maura's car and fill up the gas. Obviously it wouldn't compare to the money for bills, but when she added it up at the end of the month, it sort of came up to almost what she spent when she was at her apartment – only for different things now.

''They seem like good schools Maura, but is it necessary to pay so much. And…OH MY GOD IS THIS A BOARDING SCHOOL!'', Jane yelled. It startled the doctor a bit.

''Jane'', she gasped.

''This is like 50 minutes from here'', she pointed at one of the schools.

''I know''

''Why would you want to send her away?'', Jane asked, sounding pained.

''Don't say it like that'', Maura responded sharply. That was never her intention. ''I'm not _sending her away. _Have you looked at that school. Its amazing. Perfect. And she'll finish high school there, and she can go directly to Harvard, or Yale, or anywhere in the world she wants to go. They have French classes and programs. She'll integrate so well there Jane. Its one of the most prestigious boarding schools in Massachusetts'', Maura rattled off.

The difference between Jane and Maura was that when the brunette looked at all the school, the first thing her eyes zeroed in on was the fee. Whereas Maura didn't even look at that. She focused on the alumni and school reviews. It was laughable to an extent. Jane couldn't help wonder _how _she had fallen in love with this woman.

''It looks lovely Maura, but 54,000….'', Jane whispered the last part.

They went back and forth over the issue, until Jane came to understand Maura's reasoning. And if Joyleen was okay with it, how could she say no. It's not like Maura wasn't giving her a say in the matter, quite the contrary actually. The blonde was worried sick that Jane wouldn't approve and was doing her best to try to make Jane understand her stance. And if Jane had truly had an objection that wasn't based on money alone, Maura was certainly prepared to re-evaluate. But as it was, Jane didn't.

The detective had a case that prevented her from joining Maura and Joyleen as they visited the first two schools that were the closest to them. It was just as well anyway, Joyleen wasn't too taken by them for some reason. The girl had lived in a smaller town in France and wasn't quite used to the hurried life and huge buildings of Boston. The two schools they had seen were large private schools in rather busy communities and despite how nice they were, Joyleen couldn't see herself schooling there.

* * *

''So…shall we call this our first road trip?'', Jane asked as she drove down the interstate. It was the next day and they were going to Groton School which happened to be an hours drive away – or a little less with Jane's fast driving.

''I suppose you could. We've never really drove anywhere have we?'', Maura asked.

''Nope. We should plan something like this another time you know'', the brunette smiled at her dazzling girlfriend.

Joyleen was in the back seat of the Prius taking photos and chatting with her French friends via one of the many social networking sites.

They made it to the school in just an hour and half – thanks to the two bathroom breaks. Jane's mouth hung open as they drove down the long drive way into the campus, as did Joyleen's. Maura was just mildly mesmerized, clearly she'd seen better.

''Ho-ly shit!'', Jane exhaled slowly.

''Jane'', Maura smacked her a little on the thigh. Jane didn't even react. It was truly a holy shit moment. The place was fucking breathtaking. Joyleen could hardly say anything.

...

They spent close to three hours on the campus. It was a boarding school from grades 8th to 12th. This was a grade higher than what Joyleen would normally have been entering, but upon consideration, they deemed her suitable. She was smart enough and having heard the Isles name the principle was quick to give her an interview. The girl was up to par for the required level but would have to cover up for the months she'd missed since the beginning of the school year in September. It wasn't unattainable, she would just have to stir clear of the clubs and sports until she was covered up enough. It was all worth it though.

''Can I go back to 8th grade?'', Jane had whined on the way back home. Maura could hardly recognize the woman who had been complaining the previous night about expensive - this, boarding - that.

The plan was that Joyleen would attend weekly boarding, meaning she'd be home every weekend. Maura wasn't _entirely _happy about the prospect of being separated from her daughter, as was Jane, but they knew she'd be okay, and at a brilliant school.

* * *

And just like that, Christmas came and passed. Hope and Cailin joined the Rizzoli and Isles family for the festive celebration and many gifts and laughs were exchanged.

Coincidentally, Joyleen's birthday was on January 3rd, two days before she had to go to school. The girl was turning thirteen – officially a teenager. (And Maura was nervous as hell). So New Years Day ended up being a huge affair for the family. They combined the holiday with the birthday and a somewhat going away party for Joyleen. To Jane and Maura's great relief, all went well. Their daughter was showered with plenty of gifts and she was just simply over the moon. Margo had even had the decency to send her a present and to call to say happy birthday.

Her best present was the one from her parents though. Jane and Maura shocked her to no end. Initially she'd been a little dejected when they handed her the small envelope. Everything else from the rest of the family had been wrapped up in something significantly larger. But hesitantly she'd opened it, only to have her mouth go dry. Her present was 3 tickets to go and seen **One Direction **live. Jane and Maura were going to accompany her and the girl just wanted to die already. She was doing things Maura had never seen before.

''I think this was a bad idea'', Maura had whispered nervously.

''Of course not. You _can _see how thrilled she is right?'', Jane retorted.

''My point precisely. Do you think she will manage to learn anything until Spring Break?''

Jane had laughed out loud and said, ''you're worried _now?_ Wait until _after _she actually see's them''

* * *

**AN: My cousin's tumblr page (ultracollinsj) has some pictures of Joyleen's new school if you feel like checking it out - it's pretty awesome. **

**So guys….I will conclude this story with one final chapter and this will be it (oh yes, an all about Jane and Maura chapter….*wink wink* javalover27).**


	33. Yolanda

**AN: This is just a fill-in chapter from me, CollinsJ, because I had it written since chapter 24 when Margo gave Joyleen the letter but I had totally forgotten about it. It changes nothing in regards to the final chapter Edith is posting so you can disregard it if you like.**

* * *

Joyleen was so happy after her party, she hardly knew what to do with herself. She had captioned SEVERAL snaps of the tickets to the One Direction concert and had posted them online and sent some to her friends. All of them were so jealous and thought she was the luckiest child on earth – teens practically worship One Direction.

When Joyleen was putting the envelope away in her wooden 'secret' box, she came across the letter her mother had given her the day she left. At first things had been so confusing that she'd taken no time to remember it. Then when she learned her mother had left, she'd been upset and when Margo hadn't contacted her until days later, all memory of the letter was completely forgotten. With all the busy-ness, she hadn't touched that box since the day she placed the letter in there.

And now she was looking at it, unsure whether or not she wanted to read it. But thinking back to the gift her mother had sent her and to the phone call, it made reading it that much easier. So she opened it and started reading.

_My beautiful Yolanda_

_There are no words I could say in this letter that would be able to explain my decision, but I feel compelled to write them anyway._

_I call you mine, but I don't feel that you are in any way. You never have been mine dear. When I was pregnant with you, you were Maura's. And after you were born, you were my mother's. Now, you are Maura and Jane's. I won't pretend as if I don't know where I went wrong, because I do. And I still stand by my belief, even though many have called it cruel. I hope you will be educated and liberal enough to understand my stand point. I never wanted to be a mother Yolanda, I'm no good at it. And I hate to admit that I never tried. If you never one day understand where I'm coming from, I will not hold it against you. The same way I have never held it against anyone else who doesn't understand my lack of desire to be a mother. But what I do want you to understand, is that it has nothing to do with you – it never has. You are not to blame for me not wanting you. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! Do you understand that my girl._

_I live with knowing I was a failure in motherhood. But I can't live knowing I failed as a human being. If you cannot understand that I was not around because of ME, and not because of you, then I have failed as a human being. And I will never be able to forgive myself for that. _

_Do you know that you have done for me more in all the twelve of your life than I will ever be able to do for you if I was given a lifetime? When I think of the love I had for my mother, I find it even harder to explain my feelings. We were very close, and I loved her so very much. One would think I would seek that same love and bond with my own daughter – but I didn't. I don't like to think about it, but I know there is a part of me that feels like I was scared. I was scared to taint that love between my mother and I. And I felt like what I would have with my child, would either belittle what I had with my mother, or make it seem so precious. Both aspect weren't pleasing to me Yolanda. According to me, what I had with my mother was perfect, and I didn't want to have anything to compare it with. So I cast you out of my life, out of my heart. Because part of me was scared and stupid, and foolish. _

_But what you did for me...you made my mother the most elated person I know. She adored you, and gave you everything she had without holding back. She lived for you. And I don't know what I would have done if she didn't have you. Money is one thing Yolanda. She had lots of it, and a husband, and a job, and her own life. But her heart was empty when I began to have my own life. And I saw how sad she was, but there was nothing I could do for her – until you came along. It never occurred to me all these years, believe it or not. It only dawned on me now, just before I began to write this letter. By having you, her life was so much richer and fulfilled. I loved my mother. And knowing that she died satisfied to such an extent, makes me more happier than I can put to words. _

_There is one other person I love so very much. And that is Maura. It is a love I won't explain to you, but just know that I love her so much. But there was nothing I could do for her to express my love. Nothing I could do or say to make her feel my affection for her. There was nothing I could offer her, to make her have me. It's the worst kind of love, and I hope you don't ever have to experience it. But now there is something I can do for Maura, something I can give her to make her understand how I feel. My intention is not to have her, I already lost that battle. But just like it was for my mother, it's a way to make her happy to the highest degree. And knowing that you have made someone you love very happy is the best kind of knowledge to live with. _

_You aren't an object Yolanda. My intent isn't to pass you around just to make people happy. Please don't misinterpret this. As I mentioned before, I never knew what I was doing for my mother until now. And even though I understand what it is I am doing with Maura right this moment, I am still not selling you off to her with some sort of agenda. This is for you also. You deserve this life. _

_Maura doesn't love me, she loves Jane, so I am not hoping to get her back. I would love to if I could, but I can't. I am doing this for the both of you. I love Maura, and I love you. You two being together would make me happy and proud. I am not trying be make myself into a hero in any way. I failed you Yolanda, and there is nothing I can do to fix it. Maura….she loves you so much, I hope you know that. I neglected to ask you about your feelings during the moving process. Part of me fears that you may feel as if you are just being dumped into a strangers life temporarily. You aren't! Don't get confused my darling. Maura is your mother. You shouldn't even be calling her by her first name at this point. As much as I was your mother, so is she. _

_And I say was, because I no longer am Yolanda. From no onwards, your only mother is Maura. And I'm sure in the near future so will Jane. It may all not make sense now, but I know you will grow to be an intelligent girl. And years from now when you read this letter again, more things will begin to make sense. I sincerely hope you don't hate me so much._

_I want to say that I would love for you to come and visit as much as you can, but I can't make promises honey. However, your grandfather's house, I'm sure, is still your home and you can go there whenever you please. But this is not to say you must not contact me, whenever you feel like it, please do by all means. _

_I am not sure if my advice is wanted at this point, but I will share some words with you for your future beautiful girl. Both your body and your heart will be hurt many times throughout your life. Don't bottle it, talk to somebody. Apart from healing, it is the next best thing. I stay happy knowing that you are with the best woman in the world – Maura. Don't you ever forget that. She is the BEST person that will ever be in your life. Do not be afraid to talk to her about anything, she is truly amazing, and knows just about anything. _

_You'll be a teenager soon, and you'll start to go through growing pains and they will increase in intensity as you grow older. But just remember that the pain will get better, it always does – even if it never completely goes away. There will be boyfriend, or girlfriends. They will come and leave broken hearts but life goes on. You are beautiful, and are in the best hands, so you will be fine. I can promise you that with absolute certainty. _

_There are many ways to love somebody Yolanda, and I love you in my own way, don't you ever forget that. When you're older and accomplished, you will understand that the decision I have made to step out of your life completely was the best thing that ever happened to you. You can't have me and have Maura at the same time. So I am choosing that you have Maura instead of me. Because that woman is the best thing that's ever happened to my life, and to Jane's life, and will be the best thing to happen to __**your**__ life. _

_With love_

_Margo Bellamy _

Two thoughts crossed her mind after reading that. The first was that Maura was indeed wonderful – no on in their sane mind could dispute that. And the second thought was that Margo was right, all those words would make more sense to her once she was older. So she put the letter back in the box, where she kept her most precious little things, and promised herself to revisit it years later when she had gathered enough knowledge to comphrend everything Margo was trying to say.

* * *

**AN: Until next time…..**


	34. The end

**AN: So….I attempted a little sex there *hides quickly***

**And ****javalover27,**** thanks a lot for the help with this amazing idea. A lot of thanks to her for this final chapter really.**

* * *

When Maura walked into her office she found a lovely bouquet of flowers sitting on her desk – only Jane could be that sweet. The doctor was already slighty vexed because of the up coming warm weather. Not that she didn't like the summer, she just hated being sweaty. And because making love to Jane left her vastly of kilter, she'd worn an attire a little too warm for the May weather. But the flowers did a marvellous job at tamping down her frustration.

''Oh Jane'', she cooed to herself. The doctor slowly inhaled the flowers and pulled out the small card attached to them. **Happy birthday my love. I can not begin to tell you how grateful I am to have you in my life. You mean the world to me, now and forever. **Maura smiled to herself. Jane had already said happy birthday before they left and she was of the understanding that it was the end of it.

Neither her nor Jane made a big deal about their birthdays – Jane especially almost hated hers. And another thing they loved about each other was that they both understood this and never quite fussed about the day. It was usually 'happy birthday' and then a small gift and that was it. And seeing the flowers, Maura was glad that Jane hadn't felt the need to do anything more extravagant than that. For the blonde, that was more than enough.

Jane however, was of a different mindset this year. It was Maura's first birthday as a couple. And for some reason, their previous traditions didn't seem enough anymore. Jane had wondered for weeks now, what did you get a woman who basically had everything. There was a lot she could settle on of course, but it had to be something worth it. After enough thought, Jane finally landed on what the most adequate thing would be.

Just like the previous years, Maura worked on that day – not that it bothered her in the slightest. To the medical examiner, it was just any other Thursday.

At the end of the day though, Jane was nowhere to be found when it was time to go home.

''She left about an hour and a half ago'', Frost told Maura.

''I don't understand why she never said anything'', she worried.

''Maybe she just had something to do. It was slow anyway so maybe she figured she might take care of other things'', the young detective supplied.

''Well then'', Maura said with a sigh, and a frown, ''I'll be out then. Have a lovely evening''

''Sure thing doc. Same to you''. And Maura left. If Frost knew it was her birthday he would have wished the woman well, but he wasn't even aware. And Maura of course preferred it that way. If it wasn't for the bouquet of flowers she was carrying to her car,_she_ would have even forget all about the day.

...

''Hello Jane'', she said into the phone. ''Are you home?''. She figured she might as well ring the her girlfriend before she headed home.

''Yap. Are you done?'', the brunette said casually.

''Yes. I'm on my way. How come you left early?''

''It was slow, and Tommy needed some help so…you know''

''Sure. I'll see you in a short while then''. And so the blonde drove home.

* * *

Before Maura could even shut the door Jane was on her. ''Oh m-'', her words were cut out by Jane's lips. The doctor immediately dropped the bag in her hands which landed haphazardly on the hard wood floors. Her hands were tangled in Jane's curls in no time at all.

''I missed you'', Jane said when she pulled away a little bit.

''Me too'', was all Maura could mumble back.

With strength from God knows where, Jane lifted Maura up and placed her on the couch in a horizontal position. ''I love you Maura Isles'', she told her. ''I love you so much''.

And then her lips where upon Maura's again. The kiss could never be described as sweet or slow. It was rough and eager. Jane sucked hard on Maura's lips, and the blonde moaned loudly. A long tongue found entrance into a moist and waiting mouth both battling rigorously to be the victor. Jane won. She consumed Maura with all the passion she had and Maura became putty in her strong arms.

Maura didn't even realize her buttons were being opened until Jane palmed her breast. ''oh Jane'', she moaned, pushing herself a little more into the woman on top of her. Jane didn't have time for words. She drifted lower onto Maura's neck, aiming for that sensitive spot right away. ''Jane'', the blonde panted more. ''Let…me take…a shower first'', she begged weakly.

Jane didn't answer her, instead, her hand went to lift Maura's skirt further up her thighs as her knee was separating two well-shaped legs. And when Jane's hand cupped Maura's very wet centre, the blonde knew there was no going back – fuck the shower. She may have not been feeling clean or fresh enough for sex, but if Jane wanted her like that then so be it.

A loud cry escaped the blondes lips when Jane bit harder on her neck, marking her clearly, for days to come. And when Jane slipped her fingers inside Maura, and began fast hard thrusts, Maura knew it wouldn't be long before she was seeing stars. If there was anyone who knew how to touch her, it was Jane.

''Jane, Jane, Jane….'', Maura said repeatedly. ''Please keep going Jane…..keep….going''

''I wouldn't stop baby'', Jane rasped into her ear. And that deep sexy rough voice was the last bit of encouragement Maura needed. Oh, and Jane's thumb circling her clit. From her toes, she felt the all too familiar tingling. Her heart beat racing so fast and her nails digging into Jane's clothed back. And she came unraveled in her lovers arms. She writhed and called out and held on to Jane until she had rod every last bit or her orgasm.

''Hey sweetheart'', Jane smiled as she pushed some hair from Maura's slightly damp forehead.

''Hey''

''I love you Maura'', Jane told her earnestly.

''Me too'', Maura said breathlessly.

...

Later that evening, Jane made dinner for Maura and they enjoyed chatting and just relaxed like they normally did on most days. They also laughed at some of the pictures Joyleen was sending them and the a e-card she'd sent Maura that had brought the woman to tears.

When they got upstairs, Jane was quick to use the bathroom first. And innocently, she changed into her pajama's and jumped into bed. ''I got you something'', she said tentatively.

''Jane'', Maura warned.

''I know you don't care for gifts and all that''

''You have already given me a gift''

''What did I give you?'', Jane asked.

''The flowers, and you made me dinner, and….the sex'', she added shyly.

Jane laughed at her openly, ''those aren't really presents Maura. That's like something that happens on any other day''

''Since when did our birthdays start becoming a big deal?''

''Since you became my girlfriend'', Jane pulled the long rectangular box from her side drawer and handed in to Maura. ''Happy birthday honey''

''Thank you Jane, though you didn't have to''

''I know. I _wanted _to''

And when Maura opened the box, it was to find a sliver necklace rightly placed in there. Attached to it was a heart and a key in the middle. Maura gasped loudly, ''Jane''. And the detective could already hear the tears in her voice. ''This is….this is beautiful''

And so Jane did the chivalrous thing and got up to help Maura put it on. It wasn't really the type of necklace Maura would wear. Actually, Maura didn't really _wear _necklaces. But Jane wasn't too worried about that, it was serving a purpose, and that's what was important.

When Jane had it fastened, Maura ran her fingers over it – over the unique inscription that read **''Love I You''. **Really, it was like two necklaces in one, because the **I **bit in the middle could come off and they could be worn separately or together.

''This is beautiful Jane'', she fingered it once more. ''I love you too, so so much'', she kissed her girlfriends waiting lips. And then after a moments thought, ''Does….uhhhh, does the key actually open something?'', she couldn't help her inquisitive mind now.

''Matter of fact it does'', Jane smiled.

''Oh Jane. Don't tell me you bought something else'', Maura's eyes grew wide.

''It came together'', the brunette said nonchalantly.

''So what does it open'', Maura asked curiously. A little excited if she was honest with herself. She did actually like gifts. Its just that all her life she'd always got impersonal and generic ones so it sort of took the fun out it. But with Jane, the gifts were well thought-of, regardless of how simple they were. So actually, Maura _was _happy over the prospect of having to open one more gift – even if she wouldn't admit it.

''You have to find out my dear'', Jane said as she jumped back into the covers.

''Come on. Do I have to do a scavenger hunt or something?'', the blonde whined.

''Nah. I've made it easy for you''

''So where is it?''

''You'll find it when the time comes, don't worry. Just keep the key with you''

''That means I'll have to wear this everywhere, everyday Jane'', realizing how that sound she carried on. ''I love it Jane, I do. But maybe it wont be in coordination with my outfit that day, or –''

''Okay fine, just get ready for bed and I'll tell you''. It became evident that her girlfriend was getting worked up so Jane decided to put her out of her misery.

Maura just sighed and changed into her nightwear before going to brush her teeth.

And the doctor stopped dead in her tracks when she was about to retrieve her toothbrush. Beside the sink sat a small blue box. ''The key'', Maura whispered, hand automatically reaching for the key around her neck. And for sure it fit perfected into the key whole.

Jane was now sitted up on the bed, waiting with bated breath for Maura to emerge from the bathroom. She couldn't hear any sounds at all, but was patient for once in her life. Or maybe she was just scared and was hoping to prolong the moment as much as she could.

The box didn't really look like a ring box, so you can imagine Maura's surprise when she opened it and was faced with a blue sapphire and diamond- undoubtedly - engagement ring. And the loud gasp was the first noise Jane heard. She couldn't tell yet though, whether this was good or bad.

''Oh my God'', Maura whispered as she lifted the entire box up. The chief medical examiner wasn't a genius for nothing. '' The blue colour represents harmony, sympathy and also loyalty while sapphire itself represents faithfulness and sincerity. The blue sapphire also represents reliability as well as steadfastness'', Maura recited to herself. ''even Prince Charles chose the blue sapphire engagement ring for Princess Diana. The same ring was given to Kate Middleton when Prince William proposed to her'', Maura told herself.

And when her eyes left the ring they traveled to the writing on the inside of the box that read **''For the girl who waited, you've waited long enough''**

And when she had stared at it long enough, she ran back into the bedroom to Jane. Jane heard the foot steps and she quickly stood up, hoping she would get the chance to go on one knee and all that. There wasn't time for that. Maura approached her too quickly and jumped into her arms, ''Yes Jane, yes'', she cried. And her tears were of utmost joy.

Jane wrapped her arms around Maura and held onto her as tightly as she could. ''But I haven't asked yet'', she mumbled into the blondes shoulder laughing nervously.

''I've waited long enough'', she said. As if this were a true and known fact.

Between them though, it was. Maura had waited for this day from the moment she met Jane. She knew she loved her and wanted to be with her. And Jane knew this too. Because to the outsider, about seven months of dating wasn't nearly enough to ask for someones hand in marriage. But they essentially had been together for at least four years. So yes, Maura _had _waited long enough.

''I shouldn't have made you wait'', Jane said seriously when she deposited Maura to the ground.

''It was worth it'', the blonde assured.

And so Jane took the box from Maura and pulled the ring out, and then placed the box on the bed. She seriously knelt down in front of her girlfriend and cleared her throat. ''Having a genius for a girlfriend kinda sucks sometimes'', she started with humour. ''I heard you reciting the meaning of the ring so you sort of took away some of my words. But I want you to know that its all true. I will forever be loyal to you. I'm glad that I found a friend in you, because there couldn't be any foundation for this that's better than that. I love you Maura, I love you so much, with everything that I am. I go to sleep the happiest person alive, and wake up even happier. I want to make you the happiest person on earth, if you'll give me the chance. For the rest of our lives, I want to stand by you, and be there for you. I want to be the person that you come to for anything and everything. And maybe this all sounds selfish because there is a lot of I's involved in what i'm saying. But Maura, there's no _I _without you. So just so you know, its all about you. I love you Maura, and you'd make me the happiest person ever if you'd marry me''

And Jane slipped the ring onto Maura's shaky hand with _her _shaky one.

''Yes Jane'', Maura spoke through the free falling tears. ''yes. I'll love nothing more than to marry you''. And with all the euphoria in the world flowing through her blood stream, Jane lifted Maura up and when she brought her back down they shared a searing kiss. The one that sealed the deal. The one that said I love you and this is it – forever.

* * *

When they were lying in bed, wrapped up in each others arms after making sweet love for the longest moments, Jane whispered into the dark. ''There _is _one more surprise''

''Oh God no. Jane, you can't keep doing this'', Maura complained even though her voice was filled with smiles.

''For this I didn't really have a choice. And besides,it's not a birthday gift actually. It's an engagement gift''

And when Jane was quiet for a while Maura prompted her, ''So…'', she said, placing a light to kiss to Jane's lips and trying to look at her ring once again in the dark.

''We aren't going into work tomorrow''

''But we have this weekend off Jane''

''Exactly. I asked Cavanaugh for the added day''

''What will we do?'', the blonde asked, excitement filling her voice.

''Our girl deserves to share this happiness with us. So….we are driving up to pick her in the morning and spending the weekend in Cape Cod''

''Jane'', Maura propped herself on her elbow.

''I have already made all the arrangements. We'll pick her up after assembly at 10am. Then we'll have that road trip we talked about that time'', she winked at her _fiancée _in the dark. ''And I already booked the cottage for us, and we'll be there till Sunday''.

And Maura was on her again, kissing and hugging the life out of her. ''You are so wonderful to me Jane. Sometimes I don't even know what I did to deserve you. To deserve all this happiness in my life''

Jane chuckled a little as Maura pulled her lips from her. ''You didn't do anything Maura. You were just you. And that's all I needed. You know, you went through a lot growing up. And though my childhood wasn't really bad, I experienced my fair share as an adult. And I believe _this _is our time now. We suffered enough, for no wrong doing of our own. And its times like these that I actually believe that there _is _a God. A God who saw us suffering through out the years. A God that helped us pull through and kept us safe for each other. Maura, there are so many ways you could have ended up in life from the way you grew up. And _me? _Between my line of work and Hoyt, I most likely would have _long_ died. But maybe….maybe God preserved us for each other. And now's our chance to shine. To be with each other. To be happy. We have each other now, and I think this is what our whole lives were building up to''

And Maura wasn't sure that it was possible to love Jane all over again – because in that moment she did. She fell in love with her _all over again – DEEPER. _And God knows she had no words to say to Jane after that, she was speechless. And so proud of the woman who was soon going to be her wife. And tomorrow they were going to take their daughter, and they were going to spend the weekend away, alone, together. If that wasn't what people called a beautiful, and happy perfect life, then she didn't know what was. Because Maura and Jane had finally found their place in life – their purpose. And everything was the way it was meant to be.

THE END

* * *

**AN : You can see the pictures of Maura's ring on tumblr (ultracollinsj)**

**From Edith - the few chapters I wrote were fun. And you guys were so kind to me, thanks a lot. I don't do fanfiction so this is the last of me. But I'm glad I got to learn about R&I and now I shall become a true watcher of the show. Bye guys. **

**From CollinsJ - Thanks for sticking with me throughout this story. I had this idea listening to Adele's someone like you in the shower and just started writing it. That you guys thought it was amazing, and think all those wonderful things about me is so sweet, I'm humbled. And when I couldn't finish this you guys understood and still stuck around, it meant a lot to me, it really did. I will be starting another story, maybe in a month or so - so yeah, I'm still around. Thank you - ALL OF YOU. Please do tell me what you thought and anything you think could help in my up coming fics.**


End file.
